Christmas morning went way better than Christmas Eve, although we did at least get to see my dad and my brother Corey for a hot second. And Chooch randomly found one of my weener drawings on my phone and we had a wrestling match as he tried desperately to show my dad. It was so embarrassing. I was able to wrench the phone from him but couldn’t stop him from telling my dad, “MOMMY DRAWS PICTURES OF WEENERS ON PEOPLE!!” I deserve that, I know. This was right after my dad exclaimed, “ARE THOSE TATTOOS ON YOUR FINGERS? LIKE, PERMANENT?” He was probably thanking Baby Jesus for sure that I’m not his real daughter.
My dad is very old school. Henry got him a case of Faygo vanilla cream soda IN BOTTLES and he almost had a nostalgia coronary. And he thought the tiny donuts we brought over were like the best things since Cow Tails.
Corey got Chooch a very Chooch-esque hat:
I remember the days when Chooch was a baby and Corey used to hold him out and far away from his body like he was a swaddled bomb.
Barb hooks up Chooch, too:
It was bittersweet watching Chooch unwrap all his gifts this morning without Speck attacking the wrapping paper scraps. Marcy was lurking around, casting irritated and hateful glances at Chooch and me, but it didn’t make me miss Speck any less. I still can barely believe she’s not here anymore.
For as high-maintenance as my child can be (don’t know where he gets it), it’s nice to see that it’s still the little things that please him. “OMG A NEW PACK OF MARKERS!” Seriously. I’d have knocked down a wall if someone had dared call a pack of markers a Christmas gift for me when I was that age.
Chooch really loves LMFAO. I don’t necessarily approve of this, but who am I to crush a blossoming love for music just because it’s not something I personally choose to enjoy? (Oh who am I kidding. I will needle him endlessly today.)
The gifting extravaganza was watched upon by our Obesitree’s new sentinel, the Jonny Craig Angel:
(That’ll teach Henry not to pitch my homemade Christmas tree toppers.)
Next up is our traditional cemetery picnic and then more Christmas revelry at Mike and Laura’s. Merry Christmas, Internet!