Jun 222012
 

Andrea said bullet-points make her pay attention, so this one’s for her.

  • I am pained that this walking challenge does not allot me as much free time as I need to write in here properly. Two more weeks, guys! Two more weeks. (And from under my desk, my ankles whimper woefully, “Two more weeks…”
  • Lately, I’ve been eating all sorts of wasabi-coated snacks, but when a co-worker asked me if I was on a wasabi kick, I said, “No..?”
  • Henry’s job is all fucked up again, and I have barely seen him all week. I mean, yes, it sucks that I have to take the trolley to work and make my own sandwiches (which then get smashed on the trolley), but the worst part is that I miss him.

    Our only interaction lately is phone calls and texts—I have only gotten to playfully punch him in the balls once all week!!

    • But at least he hasn’t really had to deal with my manic-walking, so I should thank his job for keeping our relationship intact.
  • We were debating on going to the a zombie crawl this weekend, but that was pre-walking challenge. Now I’m not so sure I want to go and lose valuable pedometer steps, but I suppose I could be one of the zombies from 28 Days Later and shamble at a rapid pace. We’ll see.
  • (Totally choking on wasabi powder right now.)
  • There is a new person at work who brought me something to scan, complete with explicit orders on how to do my job written a Post-It note which ended with, “Pls don’t scan this Post-It note.” OH OK, New Person; thanks for assuming I’m a dumbass because I don’t have a law degree.
  • Sometimes I consider dumping this blog and going back to LiveJournal, but apparently no one reads LiveJournal anymore either.
  • Wednesday night, I couldn’t stop walking. My only goal was to reach 20,000 (if I end the day with anything under that, flames will engulf me while Nickelback blares in my face). But before I knew it, I had 24,000 (I was watching So You Think You Can Dance, that’s why) so I thought, “Well, no way can I go to bed without reaching 25,000” so I kept walking around my house, and it became a race against the clock — and the clock won. Midnight hit, resetting my pedometer when I was at 24,864 and did I fall to my knees and scream, “Nooooo!” with my fists shaking to the heavens? Absolutely. I KNEW I shouldn’t have stopped walking to eat!!
  • Jonny Craig called himself the Ginger Jesus on Twitter last week and I almost died.
  • If I had a band, I’d pull all of my blog titles from my blog’s spam comments. Track 4: “We All Nod, Every Kitten Has a Name.” (4 is my favorite number so of course I’d start with that.)
    • It’s my favorite number because that was my last year as an only child and it was such a good, spoiled age.
  • IT’S ALMOST WACKY WORM TIME! Big Butler Fair, I can’t wait to be inside you.
  • Speaking of the Wacky Worm, this just happened: Glenn came over and was taunting me because he only has 1,000 less steps than me. I said, “Yeah, but the difference is that I’ll keep walking until 11:59 tonight.” Glenn Henry-smirked at me and said, “You don’t think maybe you have a problem?

  • How annoying would it be if every blog post was just a list of everything that happened to me that day. “And then Henry called me a fucking retard!” “I just stared adoringly at a picture of Jonny Craig!”
  • I think it’s adorable when the new kids on the blog-block try to tell other bloggers how to write in their blog. How ’bout putting  in your time first, young blood.

    (2001 represent! Although I guess I shouldn’t brag about that because in 11 years I’ve only amassed about 100 readers, and that’s on a good day.)

  • It’s been more than two years since I’ve been working at the Law Firm, and I still have not brought in my own coffee cup. The one I use was “borrowed” from a closet where abandoned kitchenware go to die; it’s plain and lime green, which does not suit me, since I am not plain nor am I lime green. Please, help me find a really special coffee cup to purchase for office use.
  • If you read this thing, say hello sometime. Pretend I’m your neighbor who you feel sorry for but don’t want your other neighbors see you talking to, because how embarrassing.
  • I only posted this so I could use the word “fait accompli” and impress no one. (I only know this from the Curve song, not because I’m so cultured.)

Congratulations. You now know what it’s like to talk to me on the phone. I put all of my faith in non sequitors.

  26 Responses to “Friday Fait Accompli”

  1. Bullet points do seem to make really long things easier to read. So, thanks to Andrea! Go buy a vintage Thermos from Brandy for your coffee, because they’re badass and also some are plaid.

  2. Bullet points fuck yes!!!
    I also only know that term from the curve song. Does anyone even know who that band is Jesus I’m old.
    My niece just offered to nominate me for sainthood and I’m sad that “ginger Jesus” is taken :(

  3. Ps just googled “fait accompli”
    Had no idea that’s what it meant
    I also googled ” a go go” today when I could not explain its meaning to a co worker.
    Also a French phrase and this is more culture than I was expecting today

    • Livejournal is still active, but I’ve had to branch out and find new friends because of traitors like you who have abandoned me.

      And now I want to find you a special coffee mug while I’m out thrifting.

      • I might come back and start over there – this blog just isn’t doing it for me anymore.

        My favorite mug was from Goodwill! I bought it in 1998 when I was moving into my first apartment – it was really thick and had some abstract picture of Jamaican women with baskets on their heads. Totally random but I loved it. It broke a few months ago. :(

        • I like the social aspect of it.

          • That’s what I miss. Comment parties! Being able to find new friends with ease! I’m drowning in a sea of mommy bloggers over here. Every blogging community I’ve joined, I get shunned because I’m not writing joyful posts about cloth diapering and ending everything with a Bible verse.

      • I’ll be your friend on LJ! I’m bluescissors76. I haven’t posted in forever though. I need to fix that.

    • OK, I have no idea how I ended up replying to Andrea. Weird.

  4. Hi Erin – @theviking here, I’ve never officially commented on your Oh Honestly blog, but have been reading since 2005 when you posted regularly on LJ.
    You HAVE to bring in your own mug, another way to express your creative side. Maybe an apple mug? Or perhaps paint your own design? Cube life can be so dull, a sweet mug will make anything taste better. Have a great weekend!

    • I’m so glad you left a comment, Kristen! I can’t believe how long it has been since we met — I’m glad you’re around again!

      I remember you had a blog at one time (and that someone had plagiarized you, right?) — do you still have one?

  5. i read! every word… every post… and i admire every picture! lol

    i haven’t been at this public blog thing for as long as you but i don’t have many readers either… and i think this time of the year is horrible for blogging.. everyone sort of disappears into summer oblivion… bastards!

    i like bulltes… but they do make it hard for story-telling…

    keep on walking girl! i’m impressed! (like that makes any difference ha)

    • and obviously my spelling is fantastic on a saturday morning….

      *BULLETS

    • Don’t worry – the bullets is just a way for me to do a weekly recap at work while being distracted by 87 other things. ;) Plus, my friend Andrea has a bullet point fetish, so I gotta please her every so often.

      • lol it is very important to impress!

        i use bullets frequently… probably more than i should haha but when i have so many disjointed thoughts, well, bullets work good for me

  6. Hi Erin,
    I read every post. I think my daughter does too-yesterday she told me something you were doing (can’t remember right now what it was). I like your description of you being that neighbor that I don’t want anyone to see me talking to!
    Carol

  7. BIG BUTLER FAIR TIME IS THE BEST TIME OF THE YEAR.
    Sandy and I and our respective children (and menfolk too, I think) will be there on Saturday. The best part of the fair is corn dogs. The second best part is running around to all the livestock and petting all the baby sheeps and goats and pigs while Mr. Beez follows behind me, rolling his eyes, about all the “germs” I’m catching.

  8. I promise you people read this, but I know how it feels when you put so much of yourself out there and get little, if anything, back. Just please don’t stop! Maybe people just feel too intimidated to comment! You ARE pretty awesome, you know. =)

    • That really meant a lot to me, thank you for taking the time to say that. I think my problem is that I was so used to the community-feel my LJ had, and ever since I switched to my domain in 2007, I’ve felt like such a loner. It’s not about popularity, but interaction, you know?

      Sorry if I sounded all defeatist in this post! It wasn’t my intent ;).

  9. Hi Erin! It has been a long time! Yes, I still have my LJ but went underground for a bit after one I my stories was literally stolen word for word by a pretty prominent blogger. I post more on Twitter lately and as for LJ I don’t post all that much, but tend to during times of change or when I’m very upset…like the last 30 days. It’s helpful to go back and read those raw feelings and make sure I’m dealing with the situation correctly. Goin through A LOT right now, but I’d like to think I’m processing in a healthy manner. Your posts always make me smile. Thank you! :)

  10. Hi, Neighbor!

Say it don't spray it.

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