Dear Henry, Clean the Fridge. Love, Tweets

Urgent. Will die without reading.

• 18:42 Santa told blake to pull up his pants. #
• 19:22 The patrons of Denny’s let out a collective sigh as we exited. #
• 19:48 Henry has apparently been reading literature on how to raise teenagers. #

• ---

• 08:28 Henry cleaned the bedroom so it no longer looks like a dormroom. Would have tipped him but he no leave chocolates on the pillows. #
• 12:41 I’m bringing puffy paint back. #
• 15:41 Supposedly I melted the handle to henrys pot when I made Chooch mac n cheese. I wondered what that noxious odor was. #
• 16:47 If I ever lose my mind and start shooting, it will be in a craft store. #
• 20:32 I’m taking my quest for a new bestie to public access. Do it up Paris-style. First requirement: someone who actually picks up the phone. #
• 20:41 Or maybe my show will be “I Want to Be the Hump on Erin’s Back.” #
• 09:25 There’s a good possibility I was just called a pee-cow. #
• 09:39 My son just mastered the main players of the color wheel not too long ago, &here I am throwing ‘ecru’ at him. “That’s not brown, dummy!” #
• 12:22 Henry child-proofed our bedroom door knob but now I can’t get in, either. #

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