Jul 082013


When my old office-neighbor Angie suggested that we meet for breakfast this morning at either Tom’s Diner or Pamela’s, I was secretly hoping that Pamela’s would get the final vote because the Law Firm Fitness Challenge started today and Pamela’s is a much farther walk for me.

(Yes, FITNESS Challenge—we can do more than just walk this time!! I can factor in my cardio! I am also the captain of my team!!! We’re the best!)

It dawned on Chooch about 5 minutes into the walk just how far away Pamela’s is. “Wait—stop. Is it by that cemetery?!” he asked in an outrageous tone, clearly remembering being there with Kara and Harland last summer.

(I’m writing this on the trolley and someone just pooped their pants. God, first I had to wait on the platform with a feuding couple of drug addicts and now THIS? Get fucked, Henry.)

Angie brought her daughter Rachel who is the same age as Chooch. They mostly sat quietly, sneaking sidelong glances at each other and smiling coyly. It was pretty hilarious, especially how piqued their interest was whenever Angie and I would share stories about the two of them acting like Sybil. They’d listen intently and then get this proud “Yeah, I did that” look on their faces.

(Oh god, now the drug addict woman half of the feuding couple has held up the trolley because she’s short thirty cents. OF COURSE SHE IS.)

Then Angie’s effort to dine and ditched failed, so while she was out getting cash (seriously, cash-only restaurants are stupid), Chooch watched Rachel playing some game on her tablet and they exchanged a quiet series of words that I strained to hear but failed.

(Some random guy gave the drug addict thirty cents which is a good thing because she probably only has just enough on her for the two bags of god knows what she’s on her way to purchase downtown. Fucking drug addicts.)

I think they were just testing the waters. Next time they hang out, they’ll probably be running around like the hooligans that I know they both can be.

Kids are so weird!! And so are drug addicts!!

  2 Responses to “Awkward First Date”

  1. Was Chris Kelley in the area? That could be the only logical explanation for someone shitting their pants in public.

    Cash only restaurants–NOT COOL.

    Also, what kind of pedometer do you have?

  2. That’s pretty adorable. I’m proud of Chooch for keeping around his age.

    I can’t believe someone shit their pants on the trolley. That’s seriously terrible.

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