Jul 212014
 

I’ve had a list of new designs that I wanted to make for non compos cards, but it just sat in my head, collecting dust. I have to be in the MOOD, you know? Well, apparently waking up sick on Saturday was just the creative ass-kicking I needed…who knew nausea could be so inspirational. Some of you have been asking for anniversary cards: YOUR WISH HAS BEEN GRANTED.

1. Amy Archer-Gilligan

20140721-122256.jpg

Amy Archer-Gilligan was a caretaker and murderer of the elderly, but she also bestowed her services on her first two husbands. Let your babe know that you made it another year of marriage without spiking the supper. Nothing like keeping them on their toes, and possibly getting to eat out more often.


This card is beautifully printed on high-quality card stock and not the back of a sewage bill. It comes with an envelope. To put the CARD in. Anything else is on you. I DON’T NEED TO KNOW YOUR AGENDA.

2. Aileen Wuornos

20140721-122302.jpg

Sometimes you know on the very first day that they’re the one. Or you have every intention of it being a one-night stand but they JUST WON’T GO AWAY and the next thing you know it’s 13 years later and you have an 8-year-old son.


But if you wanted to know secrets about me, you’d just read my blog.

Anyway. The card! What a romantic “glad we’re still married” paper gift! And it comes with a really special envelope that’s actually just a regular envelope but come on, envelopes need some love too.

And you know, if you and your spouse have that delightful love/hate rapport going on, I can always change this to “I wish I had pulled the trigger on our first date.”

3. John Wayne Gacy

20140721-122309.jpg

And then you can be all, “Haha, Just kidding!” OR ARE YOU. Nothing like using scare tactics to keep the passion alive, so what are you waiting for? Give this card to your partner-in-wedded-bliss on your next anniversary.


This card is majestically printed on high quality cardstock. It comes with an envelope. Maybe you could rub some dirt on it, you know, like “Oops, sorry honey. I didn’t have a chance to wash my hands after digging…..in the garden.” I don’t know. Just trying to give you some suggestions. God.

4. Jeffrey Dahmer

20140721-122320.jpg

It’s too bad Dahmer never had time to write a cookbook.

I mean…hey, here’s a great way to tell your spouse they’re still tasty after all these years! And that the thought of digging into their brain with a grapefruit spoon may have crossed your mind once or twice.

This card is printed on NASA-quality card stock, if that’s such a thing. And because I’m a sweetheart, you get an envelope for FREE. They charge extra for that shit in Romania, you know.

5. Dennis Rader/BTK

20140721-122858.jpg

Let your partner know that even though marriage might be torture at times, you sure are stoked to have made it through another year.

This card is printed on high quality paper and comes with an envelope. Don’t worry, it won’t be too thick to slide under the basement door.

6. Assorted Serial Killer Note Cards

20140721-122340.jpg

I was getting frustrated because I kept promising my friends* snail mail, but then I never had note cards on hand and who wants to get a letter written on crappy notebook paper? So I designed this set of blank notecards for my own personal use, and now I’m making them available to my fellow true crime aficionados! This is a set of eight (8) note cards. They’re blank inside so you can write anything you want, with whatever you want (pigs blood, crayons, mustard—go wild!). Look at those colors! These are practically the Laugh In of note cards. 

Included, one of each: Albert Fish, Ted Bundy, Carl Panzram, Dennis Rader/BTK, Jeffrey Dahmer, Son of Sam/David Berkowitz, Ed Gein, Lizzie Borden. 

These cards are your standard A-something. Whatever 4×6 is considered. A4? I should probably google that, or research more knowledgeable card shops on Etsy; one day I’ll get my shit together. These come with envelopes too. 8 (eight) of them. I was originally going to only include 7 to be a dick, but then something on my shoulder told me that wouldn’t be good for business. 

PLEASE NOTE: These are eight individual cards, not one sheet. I only combined them onto one sheet for purposes of showing each design on Etsy. 

*Who am I kidding. I don’t have any friends. Just death row pen pals. :(

———

So that’s it! I’m hoping to make a few more this week, but you know how real jobs get in the way. SIGH.

If you order anything this week, please use coupoRn code “marilynchambers” to get 20% off, just for reading this damn blog!

DISCLAIMER: As always, I’m here to remind you that I do not endorse serial killers, murder, etc. I don’t think they’re “cool” and I don’t “worship” them. I’m just extremely interested in true crime, pop culture and designing tongue-in-cheek greeting cards. 

 

 

  2 Responses to “New Serial Killer Cards Inventory!”

  1. I love the Gacy one so fucking much it hurts! I wish my anniversary wasn’t last week, I need to give that to Correy!

Say it don't spray it.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.