It’s officially been a month since our Orlando trip and I’m still not back to normal yet. Rather than stretch out my thoughts like taffy (because you know I can keep pulling that shit out of brain until someone makes me stop, usually Henry), I’m going to wrap up the Harry Potter portion of the vacation with some photos from the last two days.
The character actors were amazing. They would hold lengthy conversations with anyone who made eye contact with them, and sometimes they would just blindside you with conversation, like one particular witch who crouched down and started talking to Chooch while he was sitting on the ground looking at his map. I mean, she asked him all sorts of questions, and she was kind of cute so his responses were mostly unintelligible. It really added to the experience.
Henry, trying not to smile. Bitch loved him some Harry Potter World.
By the second day, he had pretty much stopped riding things, and said that he was fine hanging out by himself “watching all the people run around making things happen with their wands.
”
There were a lot of things that made me squeal with happiness, but this mirror that made it look like everyone really was walking through the brick wall totally made me lose my mind.
The last two times we rode Hogwarts Express, I had major coughing fits. Like the ones that come out of left field, everything is fine, and then suddenly you have A Tickle it feels like your throat is folding in on itself and there is no other option but to conjure up a magical knife to scratch that itch by COUGHING AS VIOLENTLY AS POSSIBLE so that everyone around you starts feeling paranoid about CONTAGION and PANDEMICS.
Twice this happened on two separate days!! I was so upset the second time because I had planned ahead by making sure that there was beverage available and then my asshole son drank it all while we were in line and had the audacity to get annoyed when I frantically pantomimed for him to give me a fucking ice cube while I was literally wretching in the train compartment and looking like I was Patient X in the zombie apocalypse.
Then I brought the cough home with me and drove my co-workers crazy for a week.
Weird ice cream flavors in an amusement park—thank you, Lord Florean Fortescue. I had a scoop of clotted cream and Earl Grey lavender and might I tell you that it was DIVINE? I mean, I might if that was how I talked.
It was rull gud, guyz.
And the ice cream scooper guy was so awesome and pleasant to talk to and you know how much I hate small talk! Not with this guy!
Chooch got one scoop of Plain and one of Safe.
Otherwise known as vanilla and strawberry. Probably. I can’t remember, but I know I was disappointed that he didn’t get anything I wanted to try,
(Henry got butter beer soft serve, which I already wrote about the other day so you should go back and read that if you want. Or don’t. Do what you want. I’m not your fucking mother.)
I can’t remember if I already posted this video, but oh well! My blog, my rules! Lol(ing alone forever).
Henry spent so much time waiting for me and Chooch to be done riding Escape from Gringott’s that he found himself on the same firebreathing schedule as Gringott’s Dragon.
(Seriously, watching the fire breath never got less exciting!)
Do you know what the best part is? (Sorry, but this is about to turn into a Mommy Blog mo’ right here) For as much as my kid loves to read (his Dibels score thingie is like off the chain, or whatever) he has never really expressed much interest in Harry Potter. But being there was like opening up a whole new world to him and he has been obsessed ever since. He asked me lots of questions while we were there (I mean, he already knew the basics, but there were so many nuances that a casual fan could have missed), and then when I suggested that he just start reading the books, he agreed and there was a scary hunger to his voice. Even though I have the books at home, we bought him the first one on the day we left Florida and he immediately started reading it in the car. He’s currently nearly done with the third book and it’s literally all he talks about. He’s smug because the smartest girl in his class is only on the first book so now it’s like a race I guess, who knows where he gets that from.
See? I knew we could pull off the whole “educational vacation” guise.
Meanwhie: The Penguins won the Conference Finals and are going to the Stanley Cup Finals!!!!
TODAY IS THE BEST DAY! I LOVE EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE!
I absolutely love that going here inspired Riley to read books. I know people love to make unpleasant remarks, and I get it–the hype surrounding those books was annoying. But they really are well-written and clever and good, and we want that kind of writing going into heads. So YAY! The Professor That Never Was is very happy!
I knew you would appreciate this!