Oct 222016

We’re en route to Columbus Ohio this morning so Chooch can see one his favorite bands, The Summer Set. That’s for those people who didn’t read the title of this post. I’m live blogging because it’s what I live for. (see also: no life.)

11:23am: we left the house at 11 which is actually the time I said I wanted to leave and it actually worked! First we went to Dunkin’ Donuts where they gave me a cappuccino instead of a macchiato and I’m pretty sure I haven’t had a cappuccino since high school when Denny’s got a cappuccino machine and that was like ALL THE RAGE LOL. The Henry wanted to stop at the nearby pretzel place to treat himself and I yelled OH COME ON because I want to GO and this promoted Henry to start bitching about how he does everything we want to do and can he please just get a bag of soft pretzels and YOURE NOT LIVEBLOGGING ARE YOU. 

11:39: I just tried to get henry to care about my current favorite Touché Amore song but he’s just like “ok cool story” and I’m devestated as usual. THAT VIDEO THO:

Tears spurt from eyes every time. Real feels. 

12:01: WOO TRAFFIC! I drank my stupid cappuccino too fast and now I have caffeine nausea help. 

12:26: Chooch just came back to the car from Sheetz and panted, “DADDY STOLE SOMETHING!” And I’m like no he didn’t….did he? I just asked Henry if he did and he got all paranoid. Chooch just piped up from the backseat, “he stole the cash register lady’s heart.” LOL ugh. 

12:28: Today my response to everything Henry says will be “you’re fuckin’ faded” a la Kurt Travis. 

1:06: THIS JUST IN: Henry has never heard of the term SHOEGAZE are you fucking kidding me. So we had to have an impromptu Music Genre 101 Class and his takeaway was, “That’s dumb.” So no one get Henry any My Bloody Valentine merch for Christmas I guess. 

1:18: Me n Henry:

1:40: Obligatory rest area bathroom mirror selfie:

You can’t tell in this picture but I looked at myself in the mirror and thought “THE FUCK is up with my Farrah Fawcett hair?” Because the front is flipped weirdly. I walked out and said, “Thanks for telling me my hair is so big and weird today, asshole” to Henry who said, “It looks like Farrah Fawcett hair.” UGH FOREVER HENRY. 

1:55: Couldn’t remember how to tell Chooch to put his headphones on so it came out “Why aren’t you having your headphones on?” I really think I suffered a mini stroke sometime over the last few years I’m not even funnin’ here. I see evidence of it every time I skim old blog posts and see my grammar breakdowns. Should I be concerned or naw. 

2:58: Here in Columbus at Whole World Cafe and miserable Chooch is miserable. 

4:12: Chooch is in a better mood now that he ate. We’re at North Market where Henry passed up all the obvious choices of parking spots in favor of one where he could show off his flashy driving skills by BACKING IN. 

Got some Jeni’s!

I got Sweet Cream Biscuits & Peach Jam and Thai Curry Pumpkin. Henry got Xococo Blah Blah Blah and Sweet Potato Eclair. Chooch got a lame sundae. 

GUYS DONT PANIC Henry found another soft pretzel place. We also got donuts (Oh god to be eaten much later—Jeni’s & my broccoli burger has my stomach on house arrest. Whatever that means. It sounded good for a second. 

Red raspberry hibiscus & dueling vanilla!

5:31: Henry just lost his mind and told a SERVICE story! “Let the Music Play” by Shannon just came on and Henry said it reminds him of when he was IN FLORIDA for a TEMPORARY DUTY ASSIGNMENT during his SERVICE years and the BARTENDER at their hotel played it CONSTANTLY and that his “SERVICE FRIEND” was in love with her, more like HENRY WAS IN LOVE WITH HER. 

In other news, we went to two record stores and neither of them had what I was looking for so now I’m pouting. 

6:21: Standing in line for 3o minutes. So cold. Obnoxious camera happy people in front of us. 

Chooch just photobombed the obnoxious people and pretty much everyone around us saw it and laughed but one of the guys in the obnoxious group was mad I think. 

7:32: this venue sucks. There’s nowhere good to be and the crowd is way older than I anticipated which sucks because they’re all DRUNK TALKERS. 

The first guy to play was really great. We realized that if we came out on the patio we could still hear and the view was way better but it’s COLD. 

MEanwhile Henry is shopping at the World Market and probably taking a nap under a pier somewhere. 

Also William Beckett is here and I had no idea. How do you go from the Academy Is…to opening for a band in a tiny bar in Columbus. 

9:56: you guys I came very close to getting into a physical altercation, but it didn’t go any further than a shoving match. I am so fucking angry right now. The people at this show are the biggest bags of dicks of all time. 

10:27: THANK GOD ITS OVER. WE’RE IN THE CAR. WE’RE LEAVING COLUMBUS. FUCK THE A&R DRUNK ASSHOLE HAVEN. The Summer Set were great though! Chooch got a pick and we saw Brian Logan Dales outside when we were leaving and I was like YOU GUYS WERE GREAT and he very appreciatively said thanks and I was like “That’s how one human talks to another human. OMG I DID IT!”

Henry went to Target, Old Navy, Barnes and Noble, the World Market, Vitamin Shoppe, he thinks that might be it. I think I would have preferred his night over mine. Henry is taking Chooch to see them next time. Chooch I love you but WOW. My adrenaline is like OFF THE CHARTS RIGHT NOW. 

11:23pm: In FUCKING ZANESVILLE and I’m so hungry but Henry is just meandering about like this is some vintage car cruise and I hate Ohio and just want to go home to Pittsburgh where I go to a million shows without altercation. Also there is a route 666 and I never knew it?!

No wonder this place is soul-sucking. 

12:10am: I just had a veggie wrap from Sheetz and some of my humanity has been repaired. It’s freezing in the car but god forbid I put on the heat on while henry is driving because he gets sleepy so I’ll just sit here with my teeth chattering and feel thankful that I’m in a car driven by an awake man. 

JUST TO WRAP THIS SHITTY POST UP: we got home around 2am and I went to bed without washing my face and I ALWAYS WASH MY FACE, that’s how tired I was. Fuck Ohio. 

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