Aug 062008
 

A new Chinese restaurant just opened up down the street from the Bluebots. It was right next to the bazooka delaershop and across the street from the veterinary hospital, which everyone knew was really the mafia’s drug front.

The Bluebots, after a long day of worm harvesting, decided to try out the new noodle joint, moisten their joints with a few squirts of soy sauce.

While they waited to be seated, Alfred Bluebot spied one of the cooks blowing his nose into his balled-up hand and then promptly fisting a clump of lo-mein.

"We can’t eat here after all," Alfred declared.

"Is it because that waitress in the corner just shat into the squished eel delight?" Maddie Bluebot asked her husband, having spied a very different horror across the restaurant.

"No," Alfred said slowly.

"Is it because there’s a feral cat giving birth under the buffet?" their son Stanford guessed, squatting down to watch the cat suck on afterbirth.

"No," Alfred answered, chuckling incredulously at his family’s failed guesses. "It’s because I left my chopsticks at home."

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8×8 canvas board, blah blah.

  5 Responses to “Last Day for Fundraiser: Chopsticks”

  1. all of your “people” have so much character and emotion. love it.

  2. I need to get my shit together and buy more of your work before you get famous.

    This is my new favorite story, by the way.

  3. Hi, stalker here.I have been following you for a little while and have to tell you how humorous I find you and your stories.

    I just had a new baby in Feb. so I’m pretty low on funds-
    but as soon as diapers don’t cost me all of my fun money…
    I will be purchasing SEVERAL pieces of your artwork.

    I love your style. Keep it up!!!!

    • Thank you for telling me! Sometimes I feel like an asshole posting this shit, but I just like to share my stuff. So thank you for making me feel less dumb about it!

      Congrats on the baby!

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