Jan 29 2008

Addiction

Category: art promo,super dumb stories

 

 

Ted, Francis and Julio were enjoying a quick break during their shift at the Rust Ban campaign headquarters.

Francis was going on and on about the despicable effects rust has on fine surfaces like metal and tin, and Julio griped petulantly about how rust had ruined his favorite patio recliner. "Ruined! I paid ninety bolts for that fine piece of luxury furnishing and now if I want to pop a squat, I have to settle for the wicker chaise my wife bought with the money she gets from her ex-husband. No thanks."

Ted’s face became so hot with anger that he could have sizzled a shrapnel sausage on it.

It was then that the friend Francis and Julio knew, or thought they knew, for the past three years revealed a side of him that no one expected.

"I like rust. Sometimes I let well-concealed areas of my body collect a small circumference of rust so I can pick at it before falling asleep, pick at it like a patch of eczema. I like rust. Sometimes I stroke the coarse badges of rouge defect and it calms me down when I’m stressed out about bills and my cheating whore of a wife." He twiddled with his antenna. "When I scratch it real hard, I like watching clouds of rust shavings float down to the ground, like dandruff." He toed the gravel beneath him. "I like rust!"

Francis and Julio, totally agog, backed away in silence.

No one talked to Ted after that, which is a shame because he really hoped he’d help make strides in the war against rust-hate.

Gouache and acrylic on a thick 5.5" x 5.5" canvas, unstapled sides, ready to hang.

10 comments

10 Comments so far

  1. Bueno Mexicana January 29th, 2008 11:53 am

    this painting and story kick ass.

    ted is on to something. rust can be sexy.

  2. Tuna Tar-Tart January 29th, 2008 2:31 pm

    THANK YOU.

    LOLChristinas think rust iz teh sexx0rz.

    Now we just need a picture of you licking a rusty car, which shouldn’t be hard to procure in your ‘hood.

  3. Scarlet January 29th, 2008 4:55 pm

    gah, i <3 your art!!!

  4. Tuna Tar-Tart January 29th, 2008 6:16 pm

    Thank you! I appreciate feedback:)

  5. Jayz1256 January 29th, 2008 4:59 pm

    Do you do prints of any of your paintings?

  6. Tuna Tar-Tart January 29th, 2008 6:17 pm

    I have three prints for sale right now, and I hope to make some more in the near future. Thanks for asking!

  7. Janna January 29th, 2008 8:22 pm

    Poor Ted just learned that changing social stigmas isn’t that easy.

    This story is great! SO is the painting!

  8. Tuna Tar-Tart January 29th, 2008 10:15 pm

    Ted is based on you!

  9. Janna January 29th, 2008 10:24 pm

    Always the outcast.

  10. Tuna Tar-Tart January 29th, 2008 11:13 pm

    well, i was thinking more of how you like to roll around on top of a bed of insulation, janna. i just changed it to rust for the purpose of this particular yarnie-yarn-yarn.

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