Aug 302010

This is one of the sponsor paintings I made for Blogathon. I got a little attached to it AND NOW IT’S GONE. I hope my sponsor likes it.

The second time I participated in Blogathon, back in 2007, I decided to bribe people to sponsor me by offering to paint them pictures. I wound up having to churn out nearly 20 paintings on 6×8 canvas board. It was the first time I had painted in YEARS. And it showed. Believe me. (Not that I’m some fucking Picasso now, but still – at least I’ve upgraded from q-tips to brushes.) As crude as my style was,  it still made me remember how much fun it was, and how good it was to just lose myself in paint swirls for a little while every day. So I kept doing it. That’s how Somnambulant started three years ago.

I stopped painting a few months ago, with the exception of a few custom cupcake couples here and there. Painting started to have a bad connotation for me. I’d look around my house and see all these old paintings I made that were based on songs Christina and I liked, or a line from a poem she had written about me.

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It made me not want to ever hold a paintbrush again, like a piece of my mind had petrified.I just felt dead.

Saturday night, as I sat across from my friend Jessy on a bench, she asked in earnest, “What can we do to get you past this? To get you to start loving painting again?”

I’m not sure what that answer is. I know I need to get all these old paintings out of my house. Be it by selling them, burning them, frisbee’ing them over a cliff, I don’t know. But I think the only way is to start fresh. My style is still pretty rudimentary and childish, but that’s how I like it. And apparently, there are other people who like that, as well and it’s been really fun making friends and connections through art. I’ve been missing that part of it. The part where people send me photos of their newly purchased painting hanging on their wall. The part where people take time out of their day to send me convos on Etsy telling me they enjoy the stories that go along with the paintings. I miss that.

I first painted skulls back in May because of that Etsy’s Dark Side birthday swap I’m apart of. The girl I was given to gift loves skulls and I had never really done much with skulls before. Something similar to the above painting is what came of that. And it was sort of fun! Cutting and gluing newsprint teeth proved cathartic. There wasn’t a sadness backing it like so many of my other paintings have (whether you can see it or not, I know it’s there).

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I have mini ones on Etsy and I might make more; I’m trying to take baby steps. But these skulls, they’re fun to paint and don’t remind me of heartache.

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Yet, anyway.

  12 Responses to “Blogathon Skullz0rz”

  1. I really love the skulls, and hope you’ll find that place in which you’re happy painting again. I know the feeling, though… getting to a point where it seems more like a chore than an actual hobby. You already know that I love your art and hope you’ll continue to pursue it, but do what makes you happy. Seriously, because it’s not worth it if it doesn’t.

    • Thanks Ally, and you’re so right. It really started to become a chore for me, but I let that happen. I got in over my head, and I think I need to go back to the basics and stop over-extending myself.

      I’m so glad we met. <3

  2. I seriously love the skulls and whenever I rock my bracelet, all the scenester kids are green with envy. You should make some more for your shop!
    I can relate to how you’re feeling though. Will email you about that subject at a later date.
    Can you take all the old paintings to the consignment shop? At least then they will be out of sight.
    Your style is fantastic and you shouldn’t change an effing thing.
    The zombie collabs with chooch ate stellar. Maybe you could do a few larger pieces together? Or maybe some dogs playing poker. That would be sweet!

    • I’m glad you like the bracelet! I haven’t made anymore since then because I wasnt sure how well they’d hold up. I don’t really know what I’m doing as far as jewelry goes!

      It’s crazy – I never really thought I would make friends through Etsy. Meeting you has been one of the most awesome parts of it all:)

      Definitely email me, I’d like to know about your experiences with this!

  3. I love your paintings. I told you before that’s what got me e-stalking you to begin with, I found you on ETSY and showed my husband .I was like “Look at this girl! She is as weird as me and doesn’t even hide it” I hate that I make myself act like a grown-up out of obligaton. But you are you and that is awesome. And I have never seen art like yours before. I have been missing seeing it pop up in your blogs. I love these skulls and I like how you used newsprint in the Bunch o’ balloons picture I got from you. (one balloon has a ladies face!). I understand the connection with your painting and how it makes you sad. But you painted before Chrisitina and you are good at it so I hope you don’t ever quit for good. There. I love you :)

    • Misty, you have a way of popping up at just the right times. Thank you for this. I’m glad you found me through Etsy! I’ve enjoyed getting to know you since then and think you’re awesome. AND for what it’s worth, I don’t see you as a grown-up at all. You’re way too cool and youthful!

      I love you too! :)

  4. I was too excited to hope that it was ours… then we got a package today (we got 3, which is very odd for us).. and I was all hopeful, then Notbatman opened it and I was all like SQUEE!!

    I love it. I feel a little bad for making you paint when you aren’t feeling it (I figured you’d send us one you already did), but I hope it helps you get back into it.

    You sure do rock!

    And now I see each of them singing lines of “Don’t go breaking my heart”…

    So don’t go breaking my heart
    I won’t go breaking your heart
    Don’t go breaking my heart

    • I realized after I posted this that I should have waited because you might not have received it yet. D’oh!

      Don’t feel bad! I liked painting this. I only had three to paint this time around and it’s different when I’m painting things for friends. It doesn’t feel like an obligation. If anything, it reminded me why I started it in the first place so thanks!


  5. Bill still has the paintings from your early blogathons and the Henry calendar too, we love your stuff.

    • I remember exactly which one he chose too – it was a monster-thing ready to engulf a city, right? It’s funny, because I thought he’d choose the one with the thumb in the porridge, but he didn’t. And then that one ended up being snatched up by the commentor above you!

      I love you guys, and I’m glad you like my stuff. :)

  6. I am a big fan of your paintings and am thrilled you are healing and moving forward with your art. People still look at “Pig Prance” funny when they come into my office, and that is perfect.

Say it don't spray it.

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