Jul 132018

Let me give you a run-down on how my day is going: it’s 4:30PM and I only have 1,015 steps.

And no, it’s not because I’m on a plane to Seoul.

Today is my work-from-home late shift day which I always get giddy about the night before. I get to sleep in! (I never do though.) I can go out for breakfast! (Usually just stay home and have a bagel.) I can exercise my face off! (This is actually realistic.) Now that it’s summer and Chooch is around, I thought it would be fun to walk to the paleteria in Beechview and go hog-wild on some exotic popsicles while supporting our local Mexicans (#FuckICE #NotThePopsicleKindsThough).

But then I woke up with a stomach bug and spent all morning puking/sleeping/puking/whining/sleeping/shivering/crying/puking/shaking – you get the idea. And then I had to log on to work where I was met with several disasters from the night before and then I cried some more and had to run upstairs and puke up the piece of bread I stupidly ate in an effort to calm my stomach.

Chooch was like, “Hey mum, I feel really bad and all, but um, I’m going to go the library, don’t die.”

Can I pause here to say that I don’t understand why, if he calls me “mum,” he doesn’t call Henry “dud.”

Well, I typed all of this will feeble fingers just to say that all I have the mental endurance for right now is sharing some pictures of my cats who are the worst because they didn’t care about me AT ALL when I was vomiting and then I started crying because I miss my cat Marcy who, even though she hated me, would always sit outside of the bathroom while I puked and I’m sure it was mostly just because she wanted to be as close as possible to see me suffering/ensure that her wicked spell was working, but the point is, she was THERE and then I imagined holding her and for a split second I could FEEL her in my arms and then I just started bawling in bed and texted Henry, “I miss Marcy” and he said he knew exactly why.

Stop acting like you know things, Hank.

But yeah, here are pictures of Drew and Penelope from the other night when they were on Fly Watch and Drew was doing all these fancy circus-quality high jumps and flips in the air in an attempt to catch one, and then all Penelope did was clumsily bat a fly out of the air, smash it under her paw, and then eat it.

Drew was so mad.

Sometimes you just have to go the rudimentary route, you know.

This was after Penelope feasted on her game.

Pouting, lol.

Well that’s all for me. The one bright side is that this happened while I was at home and not sitting behind Carrie at work. YOU’RE WELCOME CARRIE. Aren’t I thoughtful co-worker?!


P.S. Back when I was on LiveJournal i knew someone who always put “vomit” spelled backwards in asterisks and now I feel compelled to bring that back.



Say it don't spray it.

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