Me, when Henry finally answered my FIFTH phone call: “OH HENRY THANK GOD YOU ANSWERED I ALMOST JUST DIED I WAS WALKING BY THIS MAN WHO WAS HOLDING SOMETHING IN HIS HAND AND HE WOULD PAUSE EVERY SO OFTEN AND CLICK IT AND THEN LOOK AROUND AND I AM POSITIVE IT HAD SOMETHING TO DO WITH THE EXPLOSIVES ATTACHED TO HIMSELF AND I WAS IN SUCH A HURRY TO CROSS THE STREET TO GET AWAY FROM HIM THAT I STEPPED OUT IN FRONT OF A CAR AND ALMOST GOT HIT BUT I DIDN’T!”

Henry: “OK.”

Me: “IT WAS SCARY!”

Henry: “What was he holding? A phone?”

Me: “NO SOMETHING SMALL LIKE A BATTERY!”

Henry: “Ok. Maybe it really was a battery then.”

Me: “MORE LIKE A DETONATOR.”

Henry: “Wow. You sure have trials and tribulations.”