Apr 302009
 

Urgent. Will die without reading.

  • 12:48 feels proud that someone found by blog by searching “shits on a glass table”. That’s pretty tame, considering some of the past searches. #
  • 13:51 Oh Jillian Michaels, you make mama’s arms burn so good. The 88 degree April sun takes care of the rest. #
  • 17:03 Me: “What’s Chooch doing?” Henry: “Tying balloons to people & floating them away.” Oh, OK. #
  • 19:05 Henry bought a super-padded toilet seat, feels like pissing @ great-grandma’s house. Hopefully he’ll crochet a seat cover for it. #
  • 19:30 Me: “Do u want me to make u a Facebook?” Henry, panic-stricken: “NO THANK U. I prefer u don’t help me w/ ANYTHING like that.” No trust. #
  • 20:47 I have a major chip on my shoulder. I’m sure that’s not noticeable AT ALL, though. #

  • 05:35 Hi guess who can’t sleep. Would be a good time to polish the silver. If I had silver. #
  • 09:45 Trying to explain baseball to Chooch but all he cares about is that my stick figures don’t have eyeballs. #
  • 13:53 And now I’m receiving broken items in the mail from my ex-bff. How fucking symbolic. #
  • 14:09 VH1, stop giving “New York” TV shows, Jesus Christ. I feel ashamed that I even know who she is. #
  • 15:24 Two tickets for Chiodos in Columbus, BOUGHTEDEDED. #

  • 11:16 Chooch wrestled out of my hug and shouted, “I just want to dance!” OK, Tony Manero. #
  • 14:55 Chooch’s latest Internet Adventure: attempting to purchase Barry Manilow tickets. Perhaps it’s my Mother’s Day gift. #
  • 21:35 I really don’t like Alex Ovechkin. Plus, his teeth remind me of The One Who Fucked Me Over. #
  • 23:48 I asked Henry to cut me an apple & he began lecturing, ending with: “Most ppl adapt to their surroundings, but you would just die.” Aw. #

  • 11:29 Trying to convince Chooch to make cakes for a living. #
  • 16:54 I need a pen name. #
  • 17:06 I’ll tell you what’s a flagrant foul – the universe elbowing my life in the face. #
  • 17:09 “Un-Brodeurian” has officially been added to my “wtf are you talking about” lexicon, because I’m convinced I’m not obnoxious enough. #
  • 18:19 I need a few “descriptive sentences” about myself. Help. #  
  • 19:01 Sound the alarm, I am about to make pierogies for the first time ever. #
  • 19:04 AHHHH THERE ARE BEADS OF HOT OIL SPRINGING FORTH. SOS. #
  • 19:07 Fuck. The outside is burnt, middle frozen solid. Hoping the microwave will save the day. Or, Chooch’s dinner, I should say. #
  • 19:10 It’s a good thing I landed a man who can overlook a little culinary incompetence. Because I sincerely fucked these pierogies up the ass. #
  • 19:16 twitpic.com/48ojc – CHOOCHIE DON’T EAT ITTTTTT!!!! #
  • 19:24 There was a melted spatula tendril adhered to one of the pierogies. In some lands, that’s considered nutritious. #

  • 12:22 The only thing missing from my life is a mothball-scented afghan in the colors of the Seventies. #
  • 12:32 @cantcme99 lol yeah I was already told it was a “rookie mistake”. #

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  4 Responses to “Tweets: Save the Pierogie Tips For Ur Cookbook, thx”

  1. I always boil my pierogies and then saute them in a little bit of butter. That way they are definitely cooked all the way through, plus they look nice and have good flavor/aren’t rubbery from the boiling.

    I want to make you a crazy moth-ball scented afghan.

    • Seriously, I miss having afghans! Growing up, we always had no less than eighteen of them strewn around the house. I think my step-dad’s mom made them or something, and they were ALL in those beautifully burnt colors of the 70s.

  2. Oh, and I don’t care that you didn’t want tips on the pierogies. I also like to eat them with hot sauce or sometimes with marinara.

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