Jul 28 2023

Yelling at Dickhead Pavers and then Brunch: A Saturday

Ugh, my inner Karen is at it again, you guys. Henry and I were walking to the post office on Saturday and when we rounded the corner to get onto the Brookline Blvd sidewalk, we were met by SURPRISE CONSTRUCTION.

I don’t know why we were SURPRISED though considering that Brookline has been a construction workers’ playground for like 2 solid years at this point, and I’m starting to wonder if they’re purposely damaging shit just to use for training purposes?? Is Brookline a training center?!!?

OK, so here we were, coming ’round the mountain aka CVS, stepping out of the parking lot and onto the sidewalk, when we see that it’s being actively paved. We are not dum-dum idiot heads. We clearly saw that there were approx. 5 men in neon yellow pouring cement or whatever it was that they were doing. So we stopped walking (OBVIOUSLY) and were assessing which way to go when all of the men yelled HO HO HO HO!!!! (and not in a jolly Santa way like it was Xmas in July) with their arms  jutting out to stop us from…what? We weren’t walking toward to them!

So then some BITCH traffic flagger yelled, “YOU CAN’T GO THAT WAY!”

OH STFU YOU DUMB BITCH, NO FUCKING SHIT!

You guys, I lost my mind and started shouting about these dicks passive aggressively into the air, things like THEY THINK THEY’RE SO FUCKING COOL, OH OK COOL GUYS, KEEP DISRUPTING OUR LIVES! GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY NEIGHBORHOOD! I’M SO SICK OF THIS SHIT!

And just then! One of their douchebag trucks farted past us.

OH, LINDY PAVING IS IT?? I screamed that out loud and the guy driving the truck looked at me nervously.

“I’m fucking calling them,” I said and Henry was like, “Um, Ok….probably no one will answer since it’s Saturday.” Like that’s going to deter me? “Oh wow, thanks for that Henry. Maybe I’ll just wait until—OH HOLD ON IT’S RINGING.”

Come on, like I was going to wait until Monday?

AND THEN SOMEONE ANSWERED!! Some stupid man because it’s always stupid men who are trying to upend my damn life. So I go, in a fake friendly BUT AGGRESSIVE SHOUT, “HI LINDY PAVING!!!! CAN YOU TELL YOUR WORKERS ON BROOKLINE BLVD TO STOP BEING ASSHOLES TO PEDESTRIANS THANK YOU” and then I hung up on his ass.

We were walking home when this happened so there were probably people walking nearby who heard this but you know what? I was having a rage blackout so I really didn’t notice.

“Wow,” Henry said. “Feel better?”

You know what? I really fucking did.

Stupid assholes.

I hate being YELLED AT by MEN. Also, their fucking neon yellow triggers me every time! AND APPARENTLY, IT’S A THING:

So, that happened and then Henry had to go to a different post office because at that point I refused to take a detour to go to the one on the Blvd, so way to go LINDY PAVING, now everyone has to suffer because of you.

Then I met Debby, Mar, and Megan at the Speckled Egg for brunch (I mean, it was 1:30 so can’t we just call it lunch and move on?). It’s the Union Trust building downtown and you know what? I don’t believe I have ever been in there!

The location and the company were the highlights.

The stafff was kind of….spacey and the other patrons were all basically influencers it seemed like.

I got whatever this is, which was delicious – stewed tomatoes with Moroccan spices, poached eggs, and mushrooms that were like those crispy onion things people put on top of casseroles in the 90s. Really delicious but I was immediately hungry afterward.

Megan told me I would love the bathroom so I went in even though I didn’t have to go, and she was right!

Anyway, I felt a lot calmer at this point of the day, and I got to tell Mar and Debby about the engagement (I actually saw Debby a few weeks ago when she came to my house to drop off a purse she made for me and it took everything in my power not to tell her then!) so that was fun! Megan of course already knew so she had to sit through the story again – sorry I exist!

I love that we meet up semi-regularly. I was so sad when they both retired, so it’s really nice that we get to see them actually more now than we had since the pandemic started, really!

OK, it’s really hot in my house and I need to stick my head in the freezer. Bye.

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