Tweets: I’m their prisoner

July 22nd, 2008 | Category: tweets

Urgent. Will die without reading.

  • 09:41 I really hope I don’t die from a stabbing. I keep daydreaming about it though.
  • 09:54 In the car, chooch & I flipped out at the same time over a passing playground; a good indication of my mental age.
  • 20:19 It doesn’t feel like summer to me unless there’s swimming in the afternoon and horror movies at night.

  • 11:50 Today, chooch is really into storing things down my shirt. A bit uncomfortable.
  • 11:53 Eric Nies and his fucking jumprope DVD can go anally probe themselves. My calves have welts from aerobic flaggellation.
  • 11:55 Just bought 2 Lost Boys figurines for myself. I mean, for Chooch. He unforch doesn’t yet understand e-shopping & wants them NOW.
  • 12:07  I don’t approve of any of the ppl looking at the vacant side of my duplex. Time to pull out the Viking metal & Satanist propaganda.
  • 16:41 One of my co-workers is encouraging me to contact Corey Haim so he can see he’s in love w/ me. God I work with a bunch of enablers.
  • 18:02 I asked Henry if he still thought I was pretty. His answer was "when your face is on my penis." Now that’s love.
  • 20:48 Henry won’t get involved in bento box lunches because "those are so gay looking". Yeah but – so is he.
  • 22:10 Kim had me blowing up balloons for some broad’s bday tomorrow, because she knows I blow hard. Now my fingers stink of balloon rubber.

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* Quite possibly one of the worst Internet services EVER. Mostly I end up doing these  manually because I’m too fucking OCD to say fuck it and drink a fucking Jack and Coke instead and OMG I’m clenching.

 

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