Jul 312010

To those of you who have been following again and reading this bullshit, thank you! You are so very much appreciated! I have a headache. I’m chewing on my hair still. Sweating a little. Would rather be watching Food Party. But look, we’re doing good things here! To date, $456.00 has been raised for the Oil Spill Relief Fund!

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You guys are generous and lovely and without you, this would be pointless.

It’s not too late if you still want to donate. The link will be posted at the end of this entry.

In other news, Henry and Chooch have been gone basically all day. They’re home now, looking like they spent the day at the beach and no one told them about this little thing called sunscreen.

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Chooch’s face is burnt. Henry’s face is burnt. I don’t care about Henry, but come on man. Lather our son up, please!

Apparently, they went to a fair tonight. A fair! Without me! Henry said three random people gave Chooch ride tickets for no good reason. Just, “Here, kid. Have a ticket.” It must be really charming to be Chooch. I’m jealous of my own son at times.


(I mean, if you want to.)

Jul 312010

Good morning! Here is my first entry! Can it be done now?

Boy, have I got a whole lot in store for everyone for the next twenty four hours. A whole lot of nothing. Hopefully I will find a way to scrounge something up, even if it means clipping off Henry’s ballsack and writing about the sound it made.

As you know, or maybe you don’t know, I’m doing this 24-hour blogging thing to raise money for the Greater New Orleans Foundation’s Oil Spill Relief Fund.

This money is not for me! It never touches my hands. You won’t see me pulling up to the soup kitchen in a Escalade next week, I promise. To ensure everyone’s trust, I’ve created a page over at razoo.com so I can keep track of the money raised, but the donations go straight to the charity. So far I’ve raised 6 thanks to the kindness of others!

Some of my sponsors have given me laundry lists of chores to complete throughout blogathon. I must include these words somewhere in a post:

  • pterodactyl
  • rannygazoo
  • janiform
  • absquatulate
  • retrosexual
  • craptastic
  • barbiturate
  • schadenfreude

There are some stunts Henry must perform, such as having a baby shoe fall on him, hugging Marcy, cradling a picture of Tom Selleck like a baby, and learning how to do the Percolater, which I just can’t wait to see. I DON’T KNOW ABOUT YOU.

If you’ve sponsored me, don’t forget to send over your requests! You can just leave it here as a comment.

I’ll be taking donations the whole time this is going on, so if you feel particularly inspired, I would love your help! Every little bit counts. The donation page is here:


(I mean, if you want.)

Hopefully I won’t throw any fits this time around. Keep stopping back and dropping comments! I’ll be here. All day. And all night. Until 9:00am Sunday morning. Fuck.

And oh my god, hopefully Henry and Chooch leave. Like, NOW.