Tweets: Brought to you by Erin’s slick copy and pasting skillz, imaginary pets, and SILENT LIBRARY.
- Was getting lectured by Henry about how I only care about myself. Interrupted him to demand pancakes.
- Oh no wait – there was a rape reference slung in there. I lose.
- I just wrote something without referencing cocks, murder, bait shops or rape. I had to rub my eyes and look in the mirror.
- And now my favorite SYTYCD girl is gone. I think my camel is upset too. At least, I suspect that’s what the steaming pile of shit was for.
- It’s nice I found out Blogathon 2009 is happening, with 8 days to pick a charity and beg for sponsors. Awesome.
- Taught Chooch that whispering involves actual words being spoken not just lip movement. 1st thing he whispers to me? i hate u. ur a jackass.
- My son is nude & posing inappropriately.
- http://twitpic.com/akatm – @ my fave place, freaking out to my fave album from summer 05. Guesses?
- RT: http://www.epitaphblog.com/… – win a free Epitaph Gnarly wristband (via @EpitaphRecs)
- Just fed my camel the cleft chin of an altar boy.
- Sometimes screamo is the only way to blast the static noise from my head. That’s better than a prefrontal lobotomy so I’m not complaining.
- Wonder if my camel will get me 2 Buffalo in time for Chiodos’s 2:55 set. Or at least the nearest rest stop where I can have a trucker orgy.
- Today, I finally buy that camel I’ve had my eye on. He will be my taxi to the Casbah where I’ll get molested by a throng of Moroccans.
- In some states, 45-year-old Mexican men (or, girls that look like one) get carded for R-rated movies.
- IM GOING BACK TO FEDEX PRAISE THE FUCKING LORD!!!!
- Oh good, my blog’s un-broked. I can take down the noose.
- Tried to run off to Scranton today, but Henry went into dad-mode & stopped me.
- Currently having Evil Dead 2 babysit my child.
- And “Easy Lover” comes on while I’m full of falafel – WHAT A GOOD DAY.
- http://twitpic.com/adj5l – Alisha & I are both wearing green I hope ppl don’t think she’s my GIRLFRIEND. Gross.
- Goddammit I think he’s gay.
- http://twitpic.com/adc5z – Alisha’s foyer, want to sit in it for always. Bring me my tea cozy, bitch.
- Yes, keep looking @ me with those ICE BLUE EYES MR LANDLORD
- Hot for Alisha’s landlord.
- Alisha’s new street has crippled people and MERSA.
- At Alisha’s new, closer-to-me apartment, waiting for her to sign the lease, and planning a new photoshoot in her CREEPY foyer.
- I can’t begin to explain the great effect cemeteries have on my mental state. It’s like being swaddled in God’s distressed foreskin.
- I would like to go back to a time when Miley Cyrus’s annoying face/voice/persona wasn’t a hot commodity.
- Thank you, Chooch’s ass, for bringing up instructions on how to remove a speed dial contact. No more purse-dialing ex-bff!
- Conversations would be more interesting if they all started with “Last time, on Matlock..”
- Oh shit, I just cried during 7th Heaven. I think I’ve been Christianized. Fuck, and there goes my stigmata.
- Blue + yellow = puke.
I love Matlock!!! One of the best shows, ever.
where did the 45 year old mexican reference come from?
and why are these still posted backwards? i didn’t find out how you got the camel until after i knew it was upset…. and taking you to buffalo.
Because we act like two dickheads at a high school lunch table, Henry and I were musing over the fact that that’s what Christina looks like, lol.
Ugh, there was an actual site I used that would email all of my tweets daily, in a bundle, but the server for it crashed and it’s in limbo. So I’ve been copying and pasting them directly from twitter and the only way to change the order would be to copy each tweet individually instead of the whole page. And I don’t have the patience for that AT ALL!
So…read from the bottom up? Lol.