As much as it sucked to part ways with Terri and Christian after breakfast at Panera (where Henry’s confident stride was in full effect thanks to Panera Worker Nikki, who was brusque and disgruntled to Chooch & me but apparently very sweet and accommodating to Henry), I was anxious to get on the road because it meant it was almost DUTCH HAVEN TIME.
It’s impossible to be anywhere in the eastern part of Pennsylvania without stopping for my favorite Dutch delicacy: motherfucking shoofly pie.
What? That’s what they call it. At night, after the bonnets come off. Motherfucking shoo-fly pie.
OK, you’re right, Google Translate. It’s probably moederfucking shoo-fly pie.
Actually, I wasn’t even going to ask if we could stop, because I had a feeling Henry was going to grunt something in a fatherly-fashion about how “it’s either shoo-fly pie or the shoe house; pick one!” and if I had to choose….it was going to be the shoe house, you guys. I know! What kind of fair-weathered shoo-fly pie eater am I? (Actually, I’ve eaten the shoo-fly in various types of weather.) So I kept my mouth shut and was rewarded when Henry suggested, all on his own, that we stop!
Some man working behind the pie counter asked us if we wanted a sample and we were like, “Pshhh, fuck that molasses-y noise, we want a SLICE.”
“Oh, you’ve been here before,” he said, but did not seem very excited about it. That’s OK. I wasn’t looking for enthusiasm to put in my mouth. Just some shoo-fly pie. Put it in there.
(Do you guys remember the great shoo-fly pie tragedy of last fall? I’m #soblessed to have had the opportunity to eat the fuck out of it twice since then.)
Chooch has become obsessed with pumpkin pie somehow, behind my back, so that’s what he had. We were all very quiet and still while enjoying our pie outside of Dutch Haven.
Applauding the autumnal offerings.
Before we left, we stopped at the neighboring building, which used to be this creepy BBQ joint and is now a creepy popcorn joint. A young employee was outside on the porch, working hard at a popcorn machine. “Please, help yourself to the samples on the table inside,” he said in a strange robot-trying-to-act-human staccato. I think he was probably recently estranged from Amishdom, so not quite a shitty human being yet.
There were two elderly women in there, and the one was determined to make sure Chooch tried all of her favorite flavors, and then when that was done, she started pressing him for information on his favorite flavor profiles and he kept tossing me furtive glances, like I was even thinking about saving his annoying ass. HOW DOES IT FEEL, SUCKER? ANSWER THE QUESTIONS! The lady’s companion finally pulled her off of us and we were able to enjoy samples at our own leisure and without her staring at us expectantly.
We each chose a small container to buy and the other woman cried, “Well, what did you choose?!” It’s like they’re reporters for the Popcorn Times.
Or, you know, “just friendly,” according to Henry.
The only other notable moment of our drive home was when we stopped to eat the the Summit Diner in Somerset, and Chooch decided to reenact the time last December when Henry asked the waitress for a napkin, not knowing that there was an entire napkin dispenser on the table. So Chooch asked our waitress for our napkin, and then shot us giggling glances as the waitress said, “There’s some right there on the table, hon.” It was incredibly awkward because it looked like he was laughing at the waitress and she totally picked up on that; and since I was the one sitting next to the dispenser, I had to go through the motions of getting him a napkin that he didn’t even need.
“Thanks for making me play a part in your stupid reenactment,” I mumbled, crumbling the napkin and chucking it at his face.
But what flavor a DID you choose?! I’m dying to know now!
Shoo-fly pie sounds magical, I need to try some :-D
Oh man! I forgot to put that in there! I get so stupidly distracted anymore when I blog, ugh. Chooch chose bacon cheddar and I got salt & vinegar!
I brought in a shoofly pie to work and sooooo many people were like “uh….nope” without even trying it! Madness.
Those teeny pumpkins are freaking adorable. I just want to hold them and name them and keep them forever.
I found a shoo-fly pie mix at the grocery store but haven’t gotten the courage to buy it and try to make it yet.
If you do try it, let me know how it is!
I love shoo-fly pie soooo much! My mom made me one in January for my birthday and hubby didn’t like it so I got the whole thing to myself. And now I want shoo-fly pie dammit. Maybe I’ll try making one…there’s a thought. I haven’t baked in a while so that should be my next thing.
OMG I bet it was fantastic! I’ve only ever had it in Pennsylvania Dutch country, and then I also tried two IMPOSTER shoo-flys from Ohio Amish Country and those ones were awful! If you make one please let me know how it turns out!