UPDATE: these are now even better, check out this post!

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For the last couple of years, I’ve really wanted to make sheets of mini-Valentines, like the kinds that kids pass out at school. Remember making those stupid cardboard mailboxes so our classmates could slip in Barbie and Hot Wheels Valentines, and then acting repulsed when you got one from the kid you had a crush on? That’s what I had in mind for my serial killer Valentines, and this year I finally made some. Three different sheets of 6, to be exact! Each sheet is perforated, so you just tear them apart and pass ’em out to whoever is on your hit list this year. I have several of my own people in mind.

I also thought these would be fun to pass out at the office, your AA meetings, church collection baskets. Leave them on the bus for the next person who sits in your seat to find! Stick them in those things called “books” before you return them to that weird place called “the library.”

The possibilities are endless! I just don’t endorse giving these to your kids to pass out at school. (Don’t they have an app for passing out Valentines now anyway?)

These are printed on high-quality paperstock in eye-popping ink. I couldn’t be happier with them!

Want a sheet of all Manson? Half Gein / half Borden? See one that you’d really like as a regular-sized card to send in the mail? These are easily customizable so holla at me with any requests. (That part will just become Henry’s burden anyway, so what do I care?)

This is honestly what I’ve been doing all week: staring at serial killer mugs and eating fruit. I might need a little rest.

DISCLAIMER: These are meant to be tongue-in-cheek. I do not think murder is cool, nor do I condone it. But what’s life without a little humor?