Urgent. Will die without reading.

• 16:31 There’s a postal worker who needs fired. I’m making it my crusade. Henry said good luck; once I have my pins made I won’t NEED luck. #
• 16:34 Walking down the street, I flashed on a vision of getting shot in a driveby. Yes, that’s my bright future talkung again! #
• 17:16 I know, Random Dildo in Brookline, its appalling that I would pick up a piece of trash & toss it in the garbage can. Who DOES that, right??? #
• 17:16 But fear not: tonight I will take a dump in your driveway to balance it all out. #
• 19:37 I am on the verge of regurgitating the oddly curious dinner henry made me. #
• 20:32 Its amazing I’ve gotten this far in life, and no Darwin Award. #
• 21:13 Chooch has befriended a scene kid at Dennys. #
• 10:12 Typical morning convo: Hey Chooch, remember last night when we went to ______ and u were being a clumpy skidmark? #
• 11:05 I dusted off Lastfm after FOUR YRS of non-use (srsly, the last time I used it, it was still called Audio Scrobbler). Add me: vagynafondue! #
• 11:51 please put me out of my misery. #
• 12:14 in addition to learning social skills, it appears i need to also learn how to walk. #
• 12:53 I’m a member of that dying breed of ppl who refuse to talk on cell phones in stores. But I will text a fucker anywhere. #
• 14:40 Hello, Gary Gilmore Christmas card. Where have YOU been? tinyurl.com/5ddelh #
• 22:15 I love the look on a man’s face when he realizes I know some shit about music. #
• 10:43 all i want to do today is sit in my pjs and make mix cds. maybe send out my butler for some champagne and truffles. #

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Newest addition to serial killer card line: Gary Gilmore

Inside says: “…to have my fucking eyes back.”

Cards are $5 and are also available in 5 and 10 card sets at discounted prices, mainly because I’m a pricing fool.

Fuck a snowman, send some slasher greetings.