Jan 312014

Corey found our parent’s wedding album and texted me pictures from it this afternoon, which I can honestly say has been the high point of this week. Even though I was 5 when I made my debut as a flower girl (my dress had tiny bells sewn into the ruffles, you guys! and my shoes were Candies!), I have only vague recollections of this day at best. (Because clearly all I cared about was what I was wearing.)

Thank god my mom’s facial expressions and vacant eyes fill in the gaps. I feel like she FOR SURE popped some pills that morning.


Fuck, they hated me, lol.


My Pappap looks PISSED. My grandma is totally hissing, “SMILE. THE NEIGHBORS MIGHT BE WATCHING.

” Susie knows her dress is the shit (seriously, Wendy and I both agreed that we would totally wear that dress right now in 2014). I’m too afraid to look at Sharon. She looks like she’s casting a spell and I don’t like it.



I think someone didn’t want to get hitched that day.

(Also, thats my great-grandma in the rocking chair. She was from Yugoslavia and didn’t speak English*. Also, she scared me.)


A poster for REGRET.


I honestly cannot stop laughing at these. I mean, I’m thankful they DID get married because otherwise, I wouldn’t have my brothers, but Jesus Christ their marriage was loveless before it even began! They make Henry and me look like a cover of a romance novel.

*ED.NOTE: I’ve just been informed by a family member that my great-grandma was very kind and DID speak English, so what we have here is an example of another lie my mom told me when I was a child.

  4 Responses to “Flashback Friday: The Day “Mr. & Mrs. Kelly” Happened”

  1. Little Erin was so cute! But seriously, they don’t even seem like they like each other. Walking down the aisle at the end is supposed to be happy and your mom looks downright irritated.

    • It’s so funny how many times I looked through that album and never noticed the pure, utter disdain. I guess because I was too busy looking at myself, LOL!

      But yeah, their whole marriage, from what I remember, was just very…there. They coexisted mostly peacefully until the end (they separated after I had already moved out, so it was after 1998) and they both just snapped out and hated each other.

  2. If you were laughing, then I don’t feel so guilty for also laughing. Especially at your Pappap. He’s not even trying to hide it. Oh MAN. Vacant look? Yes, and it’s kinda sad.

    Your Pappap rules.

    Nobody is happy in these pictures.

Say it don't spray it.

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