Mar 142009

Urgent. Will die without reading.

  • 14:09 Chooch can’t like broth, he’d rather have pickles. #
  • 15:58 I sort of miss the days when Ice Box was played on the radio every hour. No, really. #
  • 17:36 Thank you YouTube for having lewd Dora videos for my toddler to accidentally watch. #
  • 17:37 Dora picked up the phone and the infamous Alec Baldwin voicemail played. Chooch turns around and goes, “Pain in the ass?” #
  • 17:46 And now he’s watching a video on how to spraypaint. The side of my house is gon’ look tight by the time he’s 5. #
  • 18:55 Emarosa makes my heart feel paralyzed. If I wasn’t playing trains right now, I’d be doggy-paddling in a kiddie pool of teen angst. #
  • 18:57 And also I’d probably be drunk. #
  • 19:44 Oh my sweetly spanked Mussolini, my life is incomplete without Twister Hopscotch. I’m buying it & starting a league. Signups begin now. #
  • 20:28 I love how startled Chooch gets watching the Pens games with me. Just doing my mommerly job by teaching him heartattack sensations. #

  • 10:47 I wish my job was listening to music all the livelong day, and then going to shows every night. I live in the wrong city. #
  • 12:35 I wonder what it feels like to have patience. Like lounging on a marshmallow cloud, I bet, as opposed to having your head in an oven. #
  • 14:13 Every time chooch sees the Paramore “Decode” video, he points and goes “get ur hair like hers????”. Might as well, I’m not working. #
  • 14:38 Henry said, “Chooch still needs 2 be watched @ the playground.” No shit, like I’m gonna sit w/ my back toward him & suck a weener. #
  • 14:38 Henry: “if it was 5 yrs ago, u probably would.” Awesome!!!! #
  • 17:42 Happy to be at the playground without any other parents. #
  • 20:00 Would like to see how many times Chooch can call Alisha an asshole before she buries him. #
  • 21:32 – Chooch is harassing 2 teen girls on the playground. He’s starting so young. #

  • 10:43 – Wish I could hang him by that hair-hook. #
  • 12:09 Some guy just walked by and he totally looks like a scene kid from the back, but he’s at least as old as Henry. (Read: OLD.) #
  • 12:18 Me: “I love this season of the Real World.” Henry: “why? Because its childish like you?” #
  • 18:17 Quick! I’m making noodles and I have olive oil. Now what do I do to make it delicious? #  
  • 18:33 There is something terribly wrong about these noodles. #
  • 19:55 And suddenly I feel 17 again. #

  • 09:55 I’ve always had a particular fondness for rubber chicken nuggets. #
  • 14:58 My tickets for Cold just arrived and now it seems way more real. #
  • 18:54 I have so much disdain for McDonald’s. #
  • 19:12 MY McDonald’s boyfriend wears a Lamb of God hat. We’re making sexy eye contact. Hi, @awoodhick. . #
  • 19:26 My McDonald’s boyfriend looks like Mark Duplass in camo pants. He looked at my b00bies. Hi, @awoodhick. #
  • 19:28 We just spoke. There was a verbal exchange. Wedding bells, I hear them. #
  • 19:39 So I hadn’t heard from chooch for awhile and obv it was bc he was up in a Playland tower, completely nude. #
  • 19:52 And my McDonald’s boyfriend’s 5yo son said, “I saw your baby’s penis.” #
  • 21:04 – Pre-strip show. #
  • 21:35 Getting Chooch a strippers pole for his Hth birthday. (He’s going to be H years old.) #
  • 22:07 Just watched Chooch piece together a two-sided puzzle for the first time in 15 minutes. Am scared. #
  • 01:28 I’m drunk on wine and being the target of Henry’s and Christina’s psychoanalysis tagteam. #
  • 01:44 Henry: “you’re not drunk, you’re just Erin.” #
  • 01:48 AWKWARD. #
  • 01:52 Christina just invited Henry to sit on her knee. #

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