Aug 13 2009
fuck off, tweets
- and now he’s watching ABBA videos on VH1 Classic.less than 5 seconds ago from web
- Me, as Henry pulls & yanks my hair like a caveman: “Lucia doesn’t dye my hair this roughly.” Henry: “That’s because she doesn’t know you.”
- Missing Stockings pendant might be my fave: http://bit.ly/pj1gp via @addthis
- Henry’s dyeing my hair. I swear that man was a chick in a past life. (Good thing I like girls too.)
- wants to be cuddling with circa survive right now. preferrably in a cemetery.
- http://twitpic.com/dr1c1 – Sissy La La
- Still waiting for the day I can report that I carried my coffee through one room without spilling it .
- Hay look @ the dumb! The Pendants Have Landed: The Conversation: $12 + shipping. Size:(appr.. http://bit.ly/LkwBY
- 8 years I’ve been with this guy & never knew he dislikes peaches. There is so much I could have been doing with this information.
- Out of frustration, I said “Come on!” & the ever-so-wise Chooch mumbled, “THAT’S not going to get you ANYWHERE.”
- Two more days until the Degrassi movie. I should have a party. That’s a more deserving event than my birthday.
- Revamping my Xmas cards for 2009: http://bit.ly/yhTs0 via @addthis
- I don’t know why Chooch wants me to fingerpaint with him because all I’m capable of is adding blood everywhere.
- It’s a Twilight Sad sort of day. Incidentally, it makes for an excellent fingerpainting soundtrack.
- The Conversation pendant, as modeled by a 1970s nudie mug. http://bit.ly/ASBgw via @addthis
- Wants to have a party & doesn’t need a reason, though something involving catapults & Elmo dolls keeps coming to mind.
- What, you don’t sign off your tweets with the letter Y?
- I hate giving up on a book. Almost as much as I hate giving up on meth. Y
- Henry just bought metal files, & when the cashier asked what he was using it for, he said, “It’s for…..jewelry,” then his dick shrunk.
- this bastard bot done made my muthafuckin’ day. RT: @swear_bot I’m gonna fuck you until you pass out, @vagynafondue.
- Chooch found a spider in the corner; is inviting it to do a puzzle w/ him. Brought back my own memories of teaching a Mantis to count coins.
- I hate the ginger chick in the Fresh Beat Band. I want to rip off her smirk and use it to gag her decidedly not-fresh rap skillz.
- Just told Chooch about the tooth fairy & he very emphatically said he can’t like her. Now he’s trying to covertly jiggle his teeth.
- Maybe when I’m a grownup, I’ll be able to sleep without the light on.
- In the car, wanting to see who could scream the loudest but no one will play along.
- The Cure’s “Push” was on at TCBY & Chooch got all happy. This was right after I switched cones w/ Henry because I always pick sucky flavors.
- Good goddamn, Xiu Xiu in the car on Sunday = my version of church.
- Something might not be right if I’m crying at the end of Arachnophobia.
- Why yes, I WOULD like to sleep with the lights on tonight, thank you.
- First 30 seconds into the playground, Chooch’s fall count is 3.
- Henry said he doesn’t get weird vibes from our house. Then why won’t the pussy sleep in the attic like I dared him.
- At Tom’s Diner, having birthday french toast with Brenna. She eats pierogies with Italian dressing.
- SHIT. Etsy shops like THIS ONE make me wish Chooch was a girl, though a little dress-up never hurt anyone (???) : http://tinyurl.com/n6tqre
- Since spell check always wants to change “xoxox” to “socks,” I’m just going to intentionally sign off emails that way from now on.
- This lightweight had entirely too much to drink. Street-walkin’ time! Watch out all you garbage cans & desirable hobos.
- Sometimes solace can be found in unlikely places.
- Hay look @ the dumb! Blood Box: I was bored on Sunday so I did what any other bored person w.. http://bit.ly/fd3tO
- Hi, TwitterBerry. Are you working yet?
- I have paint all over my house, and no one to blame but myself. Fuck.
- RT @SWStitchery Who doesn’t love a discount?? 15% off with code “TWT15” at http://swstitchery.etsy.com (excludes custom, exp 9/23/09)
- Not being able to tweet from my phone makes me feel crippled.
- Last time we were @ Henry’s office, Chooch put a bunch of pens etc in the safe. Today 1 of the salesmen got in trouble for it. I laugh lots.
- Shit — John Hughes? :(
- Janna shouldn’t be talkin’ ’bout how divine her banana bread is ‘less she’s ready to bake mama a loaf.
- Thank god Janna is here to make us pierogies for lunch. (Maybe I should check the status of her bleeding first, though.)
- Janna cut her thumb on a swing and is now HIVing this joint up.
- Dear Janna: you chew your gum like a JV cheerleader filing her nails in study hall. Sincerely, Gum Chewing Patrol.
- I hope to never hear “blog” said so many times on the news again; after awhile it just sounds like blaaaawg & it makes me feel aggressive.
- My kid’s apologies are thoroughly unconvincing but he at least sounds cute pleading his case, that little asshole.
- @awoodhick hay asshole. I’m hungry.
- I’ve never given a shit about one goddamn thing Oprah has to say. It’s a lonely club to belong to, but I don’t care. Never got her appeal.
- Chooch just split his lip & when he saw the blood around his mouth, he got excited instead of crying because “it’s just like vampires!”
- It’s never not a good time to watch “Fright Night.” Except for maybe during a vein ligation procedure.
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Pierogis with … Italian dressing?!! My Babci is rolling in her grave!!! Sour cream only!!!