I don’t like playing in snow. I don’t like feeling like I’m going to lose my fingers and toes and I don’t feeling like I just scrubbed my face with a Brillo pad studded with Flava Flav’s missing teeth. But Chooch has reached that age where laying snow is like a sheath of irresistible cotton candy and he must be eating it constantly. At first he was content with me taking his ladybug cup outside and packing it up with freshly fallen clean snow. He’ll sit on the couch, smile, and say, "Snow!" while he shovels quickly thawing morsels into his mouth. Then my cat Nicotina comes over and they fight over it. She really likes to eat snow, too. She licks it off the bottom of Henry’s boots when he comes home from work. I think Henry mistakes it for a show of adoration.
Even though I abhor the cold, I looked at my son today, sighed, and battled with my selfish side to be a good mother. Finally, I surrendered and pulled out Chooch’s snow suit which he’s never before had a chance to use. Twenty-five minutes and a lot of sweat later, I had him all snug and sardined in his blue puffy suit, hands in mittens and scarf wrapped tightly around his tiny neck. (I don’t know how that tiny neck supports that huge head.) I put on my young heart-and-skull rain boots, battled the zipper on my coat, and forgot to grab gloves.
I thought Chooch would freak once he was sausaged inside his suit. I always did when I was a kid. I hated a fucking snow suit. The padding always made me feel incapacitated and I somehow always managed to get snow up and inside the legs. Not my son though — he loved it. He didn’t even fight to remove his mittens. I placed him in the snow and he proceeded to march around everyone’s front yard like a snow king.
Me, I was freezing. I bitterly trudged around behind him, putting him back on his feet when he’d fall on his ass. He stomped around, laughing so loud he was screaming.
Then Henry came home from work and ruined the easy flow. As soon as Chooch saw him pull in across the street, he screamed, "Daddy! Juice!!!" and tried to run out in traffic. (Henry has been driving home the Everfresh Juice van and Chooch likes to get up close and admire the fruit on the side of it.) We stayed outside for a few more minutes but Chooch’s face was all wind-burnt and frosted. Henry had to drag him into the house because he wanted to stay outside forever and ever and ever and that’s fine, but until we build him his igloo, he’s stuck living inside our dumb old house.
I think my flowers might be dead.
Cry, sucker. Cry!
Aww you’re a good mom :-). That picture series is hilarious! From laughing and happy to being heaved into the house to waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahing about wanting back OUT. Hee! Ye gods that’s a cute kid. And he makes for great stories!
Thanks, Deb! I still shudder when I think of wearing snowsuits. I hated them when I was a kid!
Chooch is a freak.
awww! it looks like fun!
that last picture makes me want to cry. =(
He’s very convincing.
I love your son. We have lots of snow up here in Canada, and we live in igloos all the time. You should ship him up here for a visit! =)
OMG he’d be in heaven!
Out of everything, I laughed at the flower caption the most.
He is so fixated on juice!
I’m glad to see that I’m not the only one with pots on my porch that have the remnants of flowers protruding out.
Chooch in a snowsuit is ADORABLE.
Every time I come home, I look at those I consider putting them away (somewhere) but then I get distracted. I’m new to this whole flower pot fad.
I loved this entry! Priceless pictures. Is it so wrong that the last one made me laugh my ass off? I’m not really a sadist, I swear…
If you’re a sadist, that makes two of us! It’s OK to laugh at him because he’s such an overreactor. He gets that from Henry.
I hated snowsuits as a kid, too. My mom didn’t particularly care for helping me into one, either, as inevitably, as soon as I was swaddled in too much padding, I had to go to the bathroom!
I forgot about the bathroom dilemma! Fuck snowsuits.
Aw hes so freakin cute!
He is a freak though, who actually likes the snow? I am not jealous of your pittsburgh snowyness, thats for sure!
We have to make sure we don’t track any snow in the house, because he eats it off the floor. He IS a freak!
aww! i loved this story.
when chooch gets older, i’m taking him snowboarding.
once i learn how, of course.
HIS HEAD ISN’T THAT BIG.
chooch really is incredibly lucky to have such a cool mom.
AND a dad with a juice truck.