We only got about 2 – 2.5 hours with Chooch on Saturday but it was so worth it. We got to University City a little after 3PM and there was a flea market thing going on so one of the streets was blocked off AND THERE WAS A MISTER SOFTEE ICE CREAM TRUCK PARKED PLAYING ITS HAUNTING MELODY!

“Did you get a Mister Softee???” I panted by way of greeting.

“No,” Chooch sighed because unlike me, he does not fine reasons to obsess over the little things, like an East Coast soft serve franchise with a creepy cone logo. 

“I wish I had worn my Mister Softee shirt,” I murmured through waves of regret.

This time Henry got to take the elevator up – we did not make him climb 20 floors, which is he STILL crying about, by the way. In fact, I even texted Chooch the other day and said, “OMG guess what he’s crying about right now.”

“Idk. The steps?”

DING DING DING.

“I’m sorry, but you two fuckers LEFT ME IN THE STAIRWELL. I could have had a heart attack!!! I could FEEL MY HEART BEATING IN MY EARS,” Henry raged from the kitchen when I told him I ratted out his whining to our judgmental son.

Chooch actually had one of these already on his desk! Granted, he had it upside down, but that’s fine. I fixed it, framed the Marvel Cave one, and then picked up the ICONIC picture of Henry rummaging through my backpack in the Busan train station. Chooch took this picture of him that day and we laughed about it heartily for the rest of the trip. I can vividly remember sitting at a table in the train station, nursing drinks from a cafe, and cracking up over this while Henry sat alone and smoldered haha. We were so slap-happy. Then I printed and framed the picture for Chooch that Christmas.

Meanwhile, I presented one of his roommates with the shoo-fly pie we had brought from Dutch Haven and I don’t know what I was expecting, the equivalent of a Publisher’s Clearinghouse Sweepstakes winner reaction, but he was like, “OK” or something and I was like, “WOW OK” and then stewed over that for the rest of the day. I brought it up immediately after we left the room and were waiting for the elevator.

“I don’t think your roommates like me,” I whined to Chooch, who did not care about this at all and said, “Well, they were having a conversation and were distracted” but ONLY ONE OF THEM WAS IN THE ROOM DURING THE PIE PRESENTATION.

“I like your high school friends better,” I said sadly but also not without a hearty dose of crybaby poutiness.

“Wow,” Chooch mumbled, again not caring.

Then we took Chooch to GIANT, a grocery store which is apparently of no affiliation to our local Giant Eagle grocery stores. He’s trying to be a grown-up I guess and opted for the lowest tier of the dining plan and alleges he will be “cooking” at “home” for most of his meals.

Um.

‘K.

Henry left us to go to the bathroom so we wandered down the baking aisle where Chooch started to ogle the flour.

“I should get flour,” he said.

“For what??? Isn’t that for BAKING?” I cried, gagged by incredulity.

“Um, yeah, that’s why I want to get it,” he scoffed.

“Well, I don’t know what kind you’d need so you have to wait for him to come back from the bathroom,” I said, dusting this whole uncomfy sitch off my shoulders.

“Yeah, I wasn’t asking you, believe me,” he sighed.

He did grab a thingie of sugar though because he said they “made lemonade” whatever that means the other night and had to use I forget what to sweeten it. Honey I think he said, I quit listening because I WAS SO BORED.

While we were there, Henry signed up for a Giant loyalty card thing because he’s a good homemaker. Chooch also made us buy him a pineapple plant, not shown.

And just like that, our time with Chooch was up. We took him back to his apartment, his roommates came down to help him with the groceries, and then Chooch and I hugged goodbye awkwardly which ACTUALLY IS PROBABLY JUST AWKWARD TO EVERYONE ELSE BUT  NORMAL FOR US SO LEAVE US ALONE.

This was Henry’s truck stop dinner later that night. He had to assemble his hoagie that he bought at 7-Eleven and that’s the face he made after I started dry-heaving to best convey my disgust at this splayed meat exhibition.

Also fun to note is that I was still on a mission to get all of my steps for the day so at every truck stop, I made Henry walk all around the parking lot with me, EVEN THROUGH THE BIG RIG SECTIONS and we started laughing because to all of the truckers in their cabs, they probably thought I was a LOT LIZARD leading Henry to the PARTY ROW for some COMMERCIAL COMPANY.

Why yes, I did Google trucker sex lingo and apparently there really isn’t much they use over the CB in case the POPO BE EAR-PEEPIN’. But I learned PARTY ROW and COMMERCIAL COMPANY after going down the lot lizard rabbit hole and just an FYI, I learned about lot lizards back when I had a Blackberry and used to play around on some CB radio channel on it with truckers.

Well, I guess that’s all. Chooch is officially back in Philly, working his co-op which he said seems cool so far, and learning how to make things with tofu which is already a step ahead of me.

I’m not crying about him being gone, I’m crying about him surpassing me in the cooking area.

Just so  you know.

*aka Chooch Moves Back to Philly Day :(

8:58am: Waiting for Henry to come back with the rental SUV – he hilariously thought that renting a larger car would mean only one trip but after seeing all of Chooch’s shit in the living room, it’s become quite clear that Henry and I will still be taking that second trip next weekend lol. How do other people do this without renting a Uhaul (Drexel says no Uhauls!)??

10:03am: We’re leaving :( Chooch was saying goodbye to Penelope and I started crying. This sucks and feels worse than last year somehow.

But hey some good news! So the whole draw of Drexel is that they have co-ops so graduates will already have 1 to 1.5 years of work experience in their field when they graduate. This is why Chooch chose Drexel over Pitt (and because he didn’t want to stay in Pgh). Anyway, they had three rounds of co-op applications or whatever starting in June. He got no interviews for the first round. Second round he had one and then didn’t get it. Third round JUST happened 2 weeks ago and brother when I say I have been stressed to the point of sickness this summer – basically if he didn’t get a co-op he’d have to take classes this quarter which means we’d have to take out another last minute loan, etc. just a lot of financial stress when we have been kind of doing ok.

All week we’ve been preparing for that. He had some calls with his advisor and it seemed like that’s what was going to have to happen. Then! He had an interview yesterday at noon and by 2::30 they offered him a position! Not trying to doxx my kid here but it’s at a museum (!!!) and he will be doing meta-data and archival work whatever that means. The weight that melted off my shoulders when he sent me a screenshot of the job offer (he was actually at our neighbor’s house cutting grass – the guy on the street behind us with the Corgi!) – I knew I had been carrying a lot of stress this summer but didn’t realize just how much until I read that email.

You guys I even prayed sort of in my own way over this! It was awkward but I did it.

10:40am: Pulled into a Sheetz. Chooch is bitching because he realized he brought one of the reusable straws in his Dunkin and doesn’t know what to do with it now that his drink is empty so he told Henry to throw it away and I piped up, “no!! It’s reusable! That’s the whole point of reusable straws so that you don’t throw it out!” And everyone is annoyed with me but you’re welcome, Straw, for living to be sucked on another day.

11:10am:

Here is Son, having backseat bitch fest because he doesn’t like the food at Sheetz but was forced to get something since Henry starved him all morning.

OMG HUGE FIGHT ALERT: when we were at Sheetz I tried to get a fork but got pissed bc people kept crashing into me. So I gave up and said to Chooch, “go get me a fork” so he walked over to the food pick up area while Henry and I went out to the car.

“I guarantee he doesn’t get me a fork,” I said as we got into the car.

Just now I turned around because I was ready to eat my watermelon snack. I made “fork” motions to chooch who got real annoyed and yelled “I don’t know what that means.” I kept trying to say fork but I was laughing because of how mad he was so that was making him even more mad until he finally understood me and said, “why would I have a fork??”

“Because I told you to get me a fork!”

“NO, you did NOT!” he yelled haughtily. “You told me to go get my food!”

“I said to get me a fork!!!!” I cried.

“Why wouldn’t you just get your own fork?? You were halfway there!” he yelled.

“Because people kept crashing into me!!” I screamed, feeling my eyes bulging at this juncture of the argument. The crux, if you will. The climax.

Henry was doing a silent laugh through this whole exchange, practically crying over it, while I’m yelling, “HOW WILL I EAT MY WATERMELON???”

“Use the stupid reusable straw!!” Chooch yelled and we all lost it at that point.

I’ll miss our car fights :(

2:57pm: at IKEA somewhere because chooch needs cups?? Henry called the two of us a “little bitch clique” bc we were whispering about him decomposing in a trunk. You had to be there.

1. Now that I have been to the bathroom in the Pgh IKEA and whatever IKEA this is, and the one in Denmark, I can safely say that the US IKEA bathrooms are far inferior.

2. HOWEVER!! The plant ball meal here was way better than the strange concoction they served up in the Danish IKEA 100%. I actually hated that meal so much but this one was nice.

I also split a rainbow cake with Henry but there’s no picture because he carved into it immediately and had it all in his beard ugh.

4:03pm: hello back in the car and I’m seriously about to puke my stomach hurts so bad from eating at IKEA ugh. Anyway we’re 40 minutes outside of Philly. I’m so sad even though Chooch has been mean to me all day. (Nothing unusual!)

4:43pm: we just pulled up and asked the move-in crew if this was where he needed to be for his apartment move in and she looked back and forth between me and Chooch and asked if he was the student, DID SHE THINK IT COULD HAVE BEEN ME LOL.

6:02pm: wow what an actual cluster moving him in but here is his view from the 20th floor:

Oh and excuse me look at what he tried to take????

I made him pose here and he did it haha. Also we had to walk up 20 flights up steps with his computer monitors and TV because we didn’t wait for the elevator again since the line is out the door with move-in activity. I’m cooked.

6:58pm: I feel sad. :( We will see him again next weekend to bring the rest of his stuff but still. This is a part of parenting that I was not prepared for.

7:37pm: ugh why is every experience at Wawa so mid. I got a gross fajita veggie bowl and the avocado I paid extra for was the tiniest squirt of guac. So underwhelming. Meanwhile Henry bought a pretzel and realized in the car that it was opened with a piece taken out of it and he was sure it wasn’t like that when he scanned it at the self-checkout but refuses to eat it now because he can’t remember opening it. I have no idea what’s going on but I’m pissed bc while I was hate-eating my bowl the only consolation I had was that I was going to eat some of Henry’s pretzel like the pigeon I am. Ugh.

8:40pm: here we are an hour later at a rest stop and Henry is still pondering the pretzel puzzle:

“It’s not hard though, you’d think it was opened before I bought it, it would be hard….”

9:39pm: did I mention that Henry rented a GMC SUV? He thinks it’s a Terrain? Never heard of it. It feels like something MAGA would drive and I actually hate it so much. Every 5 minutes I’m finding new things about it to hate but mostly it’s that I can picture these on Texan highways with LET’S GO BRANDON stickers on the back window. I always forget that GMC exists and prefer to keep it that way, which is particularly difficult when I’m sitting in one.

10:03pm: we saw the prettiest stray (?) cat at the last rest stop but Henry wouldn’t let me take her :( When we were leaving, there were workers from the rest stop food places outside feeding her so Henry thinks she’s a regular and “will be fine.” Well, he can sleep outside tonight too. I’m sure he will also be fine.

When we were walking back to the car, I was complaining about my distended stomach and said that I actually look pregnant so I started rubbing my belly while saying, “it’s ok baby, we’re almost back to the car.”

“Wow! I’m telling Chooch. You never talked to HIM like that,” Henry said in mock offense. I mean, kind of true. I never called him “baby.” Lol.

Ok I’m posting this now. I miss Chooch. Bye.

10:53pm: I lied. I’m back. We just stopped at this rest stop that has something called TRAILHEAD and Henry said it has something to do with the bike trail that goes to DC or whatever. I needed to get the rest of my steps for the day so we walked over to look at the pavilion that was built and apparently just opened today???-

I guess this is supposed to have a 3D effect but ok.

Oh! When I was in the bathroom, one of the girls working at Baskin was at the sink with me and she said she liked my shoes (just Vans) so of course I had to run back to Henry and tell him because it’s always news worthy when I get a compliment since I am attention starved, always. He didn’t care.

Anyway, this whole time I have been crying over my stomach pains which I have had ever since eating at fucking IKEA. My stomach is so bloated and distended that I could pass for a pregnant lady.

Henry was annoyed that he had to accompany me on my rest stop walk but I was like I DONT WANT SOME TRUCKER TO BE LIKE OOH LOOK AT THIS LATE-IN-LIFE PREGNANT BROAD WHILE LICKING HIS LIPS.

Henry thought this was hilarious and I was like THERE ARE MEN OUT THERE THAT I WOULD APPEAL TO YOU WILL BE SORRY WHEN I GET TAKEN.

Then I started spiraling out. “What if when they check CCTV to get the last known footage of me being seen alive they see me walking through that last rest stop parking lot when I was caressing my fake pregnant stomach and then the APB really does say I’m a late in life pregnant lady???” Henry was like, “omg plz stop.” But then he said that’s probably why the Baskin girl said she liked my shoes, she felt sorry for me being “old and pregnant” and I snapped, “I never said OLD I said LATE IN LIFE but thanks for speaking your truth.”

Then we argued over Trailhead some more because THE HEAD OF THE TRAIL CANNOT EVEN BE ACCESSED AT THIS REST STOP?! Henry said it’s like a mile and a half away. I am so irritated by this.

LOLOLOL.

On Saturday, I made Chooch join us for some Pink Box buns and a stroll through our fave cem. It was, after all, our last full weekend with him but really just Saturday because his Sunday was filled with going to the Steelers game (DON’T WORRY, he likes the team they were playing – Seahawks – not the gross Steelers) with his friends, Chipotle with his friends, PICKLEBALL with his friends (gross!!!) and then a haunted house with his friends. It’s OK. I just stayed home and cried. (He did let two of the friends come in the house with him & awkwardly interact with me in between Steelers game and Chipotle so that was something.)

I really don’t want to take him back to Philly this weekend. :(

This is what he did when I asked him to stand with me for a picture :( He is my biggest troll.

I wanted Henry to take a picture of me in my BIGBANG shirt that Veronica sent me years and years ago! Speaking of, they will be at Coachella next year and you know I am super ugh about Coachella when not even BIGBANG can get me to go again. I’m sorry but can my first time seeing BIGBANG *not* be at Coachella with a bunch of drunk influencers??

(Although it would be worth it to see Jake and Johnnie and the Alexanders, lol. A sentence that Chooch would be very disappointed to read.)

WHAT WAS I POINTING AT. This was only three days and already I’ve forgotten.

Then I asked Chooch to take a picture of Henry and me and the following is what I received:

???? I’m going to frame this one for his apartment.

Plus a selection of random close-ups of Henry. My camera roll always needs to be cleaned up after Chooch has my phone.

And then he finally took OK ones.

Afterward, we came home and didn’t see him again until around 8PM when he decided to go to Walmart and buy a blue shirt and fabric paint so that he could make his own DIY Seahawks t-shirt since it was going to be too hot to wear his Seahawks hoodie to the game on Sunday. I had a lot of fun making fun of him for this while Mr. He’s Crafty was salivating on the sidelines, waiting to be tagged in.

Basically, nothing major happened on Saturday yet I remember laughing a lot. I feel like when we’re all together we’re always laughing a lot (mostly at Henry’s expense). I’m going to miss this. :(

Last fall was so tough and I really hope this time the separation anxiety isn’t as bad. I just REALLY loved having him home, even when he was mostly in his lair or running past us to grab the car keys while calling out over his shoulder where he was going. My workdays are going to be so depressing again.

I’M WRITING THIS ON CHOOCH’S 19TH BIRTHDAY, BTW!!! It feels so strange not getting to celebrate with him in person, and knowing him, none of his Drexel friends even know it’s his birthday. My work group chat wants to pool monies and hire a skywriter to fly over Drexel, lol. “HBD CHOOCH A/K/A RILEY, MOMMY LOVES YOU.”

I did buy him tickets to the Men I Trust concert this September, which as you know, I will always associate with the maybe-dead-body we saw upon leaving the Mattress Factory. :/

Anyway, in lieu of having real time birthday stuff to share on here, here’s some pictures from the second half our day in Philly last Saturday.

I have wanted to check out Laurel Hill Cemetery since years before Chooch started going to college in Philly and it finally happened last weekend! Lucky for Chooch, HENRY left the DSLR at home so the Easter photoshoot I had in my hopes and dreams was dashed – however, Chooch was also sick with a cold so I likely would have let him off the hook anyway. Instead, we just took some casual photos which was still annoying to Chooch.

But come on, dude. Moms need pics of their kids, no matter the age!

I loved this classic hearse! I had to send pictures to my dad who has always been a classic car aficionado. He responded right away with his guess of year – “Neat – looks about a 1948” he replied.

Dude, this donut bag pops up in every picture, I swear. It was even sitting on a wall later on when Chooch was taking pictures of me and Henry “running,” and I had to crop it out. (THAT WAS YESTERDAY’S POST IN CASE YOU MISSED IT.)

If this was Korea, we would have had to wait in line to get these pictures. Trees are famous in Korea! And the ones here in Laurel Hill were poppin’ off this spring. The juxtaposition of decrepit tombstones and bright florals was so my vibe.

FYI – Chooch got that shirt last fall when he won dodgeball or something.

Honestly, I didn’t even know he was sick until halfway during our cemetery walk when was like, “Leave me alone, I’m sick” and I was like, “Wait, you are?” and he was like, “Hello, have you not seen me coughing this entire time??”

All the moms are momming.

Then there’s me.

Me taking dumb selfies and apparently ignoring the symphony of sickn emanating from my child.

Mwah. Chef’s kiss. This place probably looks impeccably macabre on a rainy day, too.

Maybe this is where we’ll take Chooch’s college graduation portraits?!

I love a cem with layers.

Like a cake.

But old and rotted.

I am really so deep in my feelings over this birthday. 19!! This whole past year has made me question life and time every single time. Who am I? What is my purpose now? Just lots of panic and sadness. And confusion.

You can take tours here but we didn’t have enough time. I do know that the Rittenhouse guy is buried here (there is a Rittenhouse building thing in Philly so that’s my only knowledge of him) and the broad who petitioned the government to recognize Thanksgiving as a federal holiday.

I learned this by watching “Philly cemetery” vids on YouTube, which is also how I found a news clip of a recent incident at a local Philly cem where the pallbearers FELL INTO THE BURIAL HOLE and there was a video of it happening which, OK THIS IS NOT TRULY FUNNY, but that sick and dark part of me started cracking up and I sent it to Corey and said, “I AM PICTURING JANNA FALLING INTO AN OPEN GRAVE NOW AND US MAKING HER DO IT OVER SO WE CAN RECORD IT” and he was like, “OMG YES!”

Quick, someone ask Janna to be a pallbearer!!

Chooch in the middle of criticizing / judging / mocking me. Normalcy!

And me in the process of making sure he’s being in an active participant in our MOMMY / SON photo sesh.

Donut bags.

None of us have seen this movie, but maybe you have so this could be interesting to you.

(Who are you?)

This is in the “Millionaires” section.

I Wiki’d this guy for you:

An English American industrialist who founded the Keystone Saw Works in 1840 and developed the surrounding Tacony neighborhood of Philadelphia to build housing for his workers. His company became the Disston Saw Works and was the top manufacturer of hand saws in the United States during the late 19th-century and early 20th century.

Boring.

SERIOUSLY, GO OFF QUEEN!!!

I feel bad that these are in the worst part, butted up against a chainlink fence along a busy road, but here’s some Rocky stuff for you. Chooch mumbled, “I guess I’ll take a picture too, ugh.” LOL.

After this, Chooch got to drive for the first time in Philly. He asked “an undisclosed friend” for some cafe recs and we ended up at Greek from Greece around the corner from his dorm. I got a butterfly pea latte and it was very refreshing! If we hadn’t had donuts, I’d have definitely gotten something from the dessert display there. They had orange pie! Next time. Next time.

I didn’t think so, but thank you, Mirror.

And that concludes another visit with Chooch!

WHO BTW JUST SENT ME THESE PICTURES AFTER I BEGGED HIM TO MAKE PICTURES OF JANNA FALLING INTO A GRAVE!!!!!

She looks so happy! “Wheeee!” Also, the way her torso and legs are facing opposite directions is sending me!

Philly is not exactly considered a “day trip” for most Pittsburghers, as it takes a good 4.5 – 5 hours by car. Yet somehow, we have done this approx. 5 times in the last 6 months. It is effing exhausting but worth it to get a few hours of quality time with Chooch. (If you ask him, he will likely drop the ‘quality’ and just call it ‘time’ haha, annoying parents.) Ideally, we would have liked to have spent the whole weekend there, but we are going away to Detroit this weekend and:

• $$$
• hate leaving Penelope overnight for two weekends in a row

So, a quick Saturday trip it was! The drive there was relatively uneventful. Sheetz stop for breakfast where I flipped out and cried, “EVERY TIME I TURN AROUND THERE ARE MEN IN MY WAY! MEN ARE EVERYWHERE I NEED TO BE!” and Henry was about to say “calm down,” I could tell. But he thought better of it and instead said, “What do you need, I’ll get it for you” – NICE TRY! This just made me even more angry and I shouted, “I CAN DO IT MYSELF!”

In case you were wondering, I needed coffee in a bigly way but there were MEN at the coffee area, stinking it up with waves of toxic masculinity, and then every time I turned a corner – MORE FUCKING MEN.

I really wanted to rip my skin off. Or theirs.

OK, theirs. LOL.

Then Waze was like, “Hi, here is a new way for you to try, apropos of nothing” and it ended up taking us through some park with lots of lollygagging drivers, but we finally arrived at Chooch’s dorm around 1:00!

I was so excited because ever since the first time we went to Drexel for a visit last April, I have been obsessed with this cute breakfast/lunch spot called SABRINA’S. I guess there are numerous locations around town but the one on Drexel’s campus is by far the most aesthetic because of the sweet ass Victorian house in which the millennial brunch classics are whipped up.

We had about a 20 minute wait so Chooch took us around the corner to some campus market thing that he goes to a lot, just a convenience store thing where he can use his Dragon dollars (OMG this just gave me a flashback to when I went to Pitt as a non-trad student and begged my mom to add cash to my Panther card so I could use it in the vending machines and she was like, “ha ha” but I was serious). Anyway, the older woman cashier was all, “HEY BABY!” to Chooch and then she chuckled and said, “I KNOW I’LL SEE YOU LATER” because he evidently is a REGULAR there and also, I am aware that the way I wrote this makes it sound like she is predatory but she was sincerely just a very jovial woman.

I loved how everywhere we went around campus, people knew Chooch. He’s branching out, you guys. I love that for him!

Then we were sitting outside of Sabrina’s waiting for our table and a group of old ladies walked past, but one stopped dead in her tracks and exclaimed, “OH I LOVE YOUR SHOES!” but it was DIRECTED AT CHOOCH, NOT ME. Chooch gets all the attention in Philly!!! I am just the shadow in the background there. It’s fine, I’m OK with that.

(Am I though? Currently plotting my outfit/accessories for our next visit. Must upstage him.)

THAT LOOK OF DISDAIN, DO YOU THINK HE MISSED ME?

I loved everything about Sabrina’s. It’s small and our table right in the flight path of the servers, but it still somehow felt cozy and delightful. Every staff member we interacted with was beyond friendly. And the menu is so veg/vegan friendly! I had the hardest time choosing what I wanted. I thought for sure it was going to be the banh mi because I had studied the menu online prior to our visit and even sent Chooch a screenshot of it.

“That looks good,” he replied, and I was shocked because it was one of those rare moments where he was acting like an adult and not a kid who is perpetually annoyed and embarrassed of his parent.

But then we got there and the actual menu seemed larger than the one online, so my options began to expand until I finally settled on the OG Vegan bowl with tofu, boy-o.

Henry got the Korean bowl (it came with chicken and didn’t have sub options like some of the other menu items so I didn’t want to be difficult by asking) and POLENTA FRIES, and Chooch got some kind of omelet. We were all content.

After lunch, we drove to Dottie’s Donuts – we went to a different location YEARS ago and I’m happy that they’re still around. I know none of us our vegan but when the options are there, I will take it so I always like to look for vegan spots when we’re on road trips. While we were at lunch, Dottie’s most recent post came up in my IG feed and it was a table-thumping moment for me.

“The special donut this weekend at Dottie’s is BAKLAVA.”

“I guess we’re going to Dottie’s,” Henry sighed as though he wasn’t secretly getting hot for donuts.

Dude, this fucker was bussin’. I was sad that once again I made poor choices and said I would share this with Henry. What an unbelievable life fail. We took our bounty to the Laurel Hill Cemetery (separate post to come!) and Henry is so lucky that I was feeling a modicum of love for him at the time because he immediately walked over to the office to use the bathroom, leaving me alone with this bad boy which I could have easily inhaled in three bites, but I somehow managed to stop myself at the halfway mark.

(This is also mostly because I have been feeling super down on myself re: old lady weight gain this past year, and actually much less to do with any spousal love haha.)

Anyway, we also got a Thai tea donut to share, and Chooch got two of his own – also a Thai tea and a vanilla frosted I think. Excellent, chewy donuts in a beautiful setting in perfect spring weather with my favorite people back together again.  I couldn’t have been happier.

l

Corey and I were stressing over finding a good place to eat post-Mattress Factory when we first made plans but then Chooch came home from college and was like, “I want to go to Cafe Moulin. One of my friends recommended it.”

Turns out the FRIEND is Sophia, who probably is legit just a friend but I had to be a total mom about it and start grilling him for info. She’s part of his friend group in Drexel (HER ROOMMATE IS FROM ROMANIA!) and is from Grand Rapids but her dad went to CMU so I guess they were visiting Pittsburgh at some point because of that, but I thought it was kind of funny that we were going somewhere based on a quasi-tourist’s suggestion.

Especially since it wasn’t really anywhere near the Mattress Factory and Chooch said he didn’t necessarily mean that he wanted to go there THAT DAY but once it was mentioned, Corey and I both had CREPES ON THE BRAIN.

Speaking of brain, we spent the whole drive to Shadyside rehashing the body outside of the Mattress Factory. We were all determined to continue having a good day but now there was this macabre fog hunkering down on us, you know? Add to that the fact that Corey had recently hit a deer with his car and when we got out of it in the parking garage, he pointed out some DEER FUR that was still stuck to it?!!? I wailed, “WHY WOULD YOU SHOW ME THAT??”

He re-emphasized the fact that the deer was actually fine BUT STILL?! Jesus!

Anyway, Cafe Moulin was packed but luckily we were able to get a table within about 10 minutes. It took us forever to order because Corey couldn’t decide between sweet and savory so finally Chooch had enough and tossed a coffee creamer onto the menu. It landed on the Dubai chocolate crepe so Chooch was like, “Congratulations, now let’s move on with our lives.”

I’m telling you, Chooch is the adult amongst us.

FALALALALALA-FUCK these crepes were things of beauty! Corey let us try his and I had ordering remorse BUT my crepe was also delicious and so was Chooch’s (Chooch and I split ours with each other because we couldn’t choose – we made the right decision).

Chooch had to cut mine for me LOLOLOL.

His was the spanakopita and mine was….I forget but it was basically a caprese and oh, did it sweetly butter my muffin.

(Tivoli! Mine was called the Tivoli!)

Other things to note from Cafe Moulin:

• Corey and I go to the same therapy place so we talked extensively about our mutual family issues which inspired me to ask Chooch if he was happy, was his childhood ok, does he think he will need therapy someday?? He said yes, yes, and no!
• There was a young single diner sitting at a table for two, reading TUESDAYS WITH MORRIE while slowly peckig away at a crepe and sipping coffee. No shade on her at all, in fact, I was admiring her because I’m not the type of person who is OK with solo dining, but it did make me chuckle because the book choice kind of sent it over the top for me and I started wondering if she has one of the decks of cards that give you a solo adventure to go on and the one she pulled that morning was “eat crepes alone in a Parisian cafe while reading a famous memoir.”
• Chooch super dramatically spilled his glass of water. Like, he spilled it and then somehow spilled it again when he tried to set the glass upright and water was everywhere, but mostly pooled in the crotch of his pants. Luckily, he was wearing black track pants that day, but it was still enough of a spill that one of the servers had to come over to assist with a thick boi stack of napkins.

Overall, solid 10/10. I don’t have crepes very often but these really seemed like god tier crepes, at least for Pgh anyway.

After this, we went  to Kawaii Gifts and I bought the BSS album!! Corey and Chooch were like, “Mmm. That’s cool.” Things have really changed because when I used to go here, they never had anything kpop-related! And now they have a fairly decent collection, I must say.

Then we went to Amazing Books and as soon as we walked in, Chooch stopped in his tracks.

“Is this….oh wow, it is!” he said, in a “HARK!” stance and looking up at the ceiling. Turns out they were playing the new MEN I TRUST. What the actual fuck, you guys. I will always relate this band to THE MAYBE-DEAD BODY.

Chooch said this was the song that was on in Corey’s car when we were waiting to pull out of the Mattress Factory parking lot and then…well, you know the rest. UNLESS YOU DON’T READ EVERY BLOG POST I WRITE AND IN THAT CASE…well, I probably wouldn’t either I were you.

Chooch went over to the counter and had a lengthy conversation with the two guys working there about the new album while I was pretending to peruse books and not constantly thinking of the lady and the blood and the way her body was slumped over the curb of a random street in the Northside, and Corey was looking at a rack of greeting cards made by local artists which, btw, is also what he was looking at in the Mattress Factory’s gift shop, SHOULD I SEND HIM THE LINK TO MY ETSY CARD SHOP AND REMIND HIM THAT I TOO MAKE GREETING CARDS.

One last stop before we left was the little independent toy store and the lady working there reminded us of Janna’s mom a little so then Corey and I started up again with our favorite memory of Janna being beaten by her mom behind a curtained window and that was fun but also my stomach was starting to hurt from the crepes and the general excitement of the day so now I will associate that toy store with pain. Chooch meanwhile touched every single item in that place and then ended up not wanting anything, not even the dumb things that Janna’s mom was demo’ing for him (“THIS BALL CAN BOUNCE UPWARD OF 10 STORIES!”) which is CRAZY because I was offering to buy him pretty much everything since I was so happy to have him home.

And then we came home, where I would go on to spend the next two weeks hyper-obsessing over THE LADY and driving Henry and Chooch crazy over it.

(The next day when we were at lunch, I asked Chooch if he told any of his friends and he said, “No, because maybe did it occur to you that I’m traumatized and don’t want to talk about it?” he said drily.

“OMG REALLY??” I cried, ready to consult my mental Mothering manual.

“No!” he said, going back to looking at his phone while eating his omelet. Wow.)

8:09am: we just left to drive Chooch back to Philly :( Running behind schedule because

1. He wasn’t fully packed
2. He “lost” his wallet (it was on his bed but he didn’t realize he didn’t have it until we were getting in the car

Anyway, I didn’t plan this but my nail polish perfectly matches my windbreaker so then I had to swap out my shoes and purse to complete the coordination. Not seen – pendant that also got the memo.

8:40am: Sheetz update! Henry is bitching because we spent over $40 like we just went to a restaurant for breakfast. Then Henry thought he was a hero because he held the door open for a man exiting with a case of Mountain Dew but I ALSO HELD A DOOR OPEN FOR HIM?! Then right as Henry was getting ready to start the car, the Mountain Dew guy pulled up alongside of us in his white stallion truck to signal that Henry’s DRINK WAS ON THE ROOF OF THE CAR. It was a real wholesome moment like a scene out of Donna Reed or some shit. Henry did the “another mans is talkin’ to me” hyuk hyuk, his standard response.

9:52am: CHOOCH IS/WAS READING A BOOK. Apparently I disrupted him by telling Henry I need to pee so that drew attention to him at which point I started bombarding him with questions and then Henry was like HE IS READING A BOOK! and I almost broke neck trying to turn around to see. It’s a Brandon Sanderson book and I said “I want to read his books but they’re like 800 pages.”

“I know,” Chooch grunted.

“That doesn’t look like it’s 800 pages,” Henry said.

“That’s because it broke and the other part is in my dorm,” Chooch said. Sounds about right. It’s also not his book but his friend Ben’s in case anyone needs to note that in the log.

10:13am: First rest stop of the drive in Bedford and Chooch realized that he forgot something.

“My Rubik’s Cube!” he cried. Oh to the well.

Then it took him forever to decide what snack he wanted from 7-seven and Henry was so annoyed and ughhhh I’m going to miss this. :(

12:57pm: In traffic outside of Philly. Chooch and I slept most of the ride haha. But now he and Henry are arguing because chooch put the window down. “THE AC IS ON!” Henry bellowed. And chooch mouthed off back and then Henry angrily twisted the AC knob to OFF and is pouting now. Welcome us, Philly! We’re here!

Also this was happening during the Jennie / Dua Lipa “Handlebars” song and I yelled at them for ruining it for me.

“I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT THIS IS!” chooch yelled. Wowowowow.

I can’t remember if it was our flight to Korea but on some recent long-haul flight I listened to a Dua Lipa playlist on the inflight entertainment thing for nearly the whole flight while playing some number game and Chooch was disgusted.

1:27pm:

1:51pm: We’re here! First Henry to go back to get his phone in the garage because he’s an idiot so Chooch and I ditched him because we had to pee.

In that building back there! There are also bunnies roaming the grounds everywhere over there which is cute but weird.

College bathroom selfie!

Now we’re waiting for gross SEPTA to take us downtown.

2:25pm: well no one was paying attention and we passed the stop (to be fair no one told me where we were going) so we ended up having to walk a bit which was a big Lost in Korea mood with Henry and Chooch bickering. It warmed my heart.

But anyway we had to put our name in at Bae Bombon so we came next door to Black Turtle Coffee where the most agitated girl waited on us but whatever. We have iced drinks and are sitting peacefully in wait.

5:56pm: Henry and I are on our way home now. :( Another lackluster goodbye from our son lol.

We did finally eating at Bar Bombon and it was good but S H E E S H getting a table was an ordeal and I said no less than 17 times that I wanted to just go elsewhere. We did attempt to go to a place across the street called The Love or something but they had just closed for the between brunch / dinner time.

I got really mad because it appeared that the hostess gave our table to some old bitches who came straight from yoga, rolled mats and all, but Henry the White Knight of Hostesses because it reminds him of the packaged baked goods mmm Ho Hos, insisted that they were ahead of us on Open Table. Ok Henry. You know everything.

Then they tried to give us the lone table in the front right smack in the busy sidewalk after saying that they would seat us inside and I was like NO THANK YOU.

They promised Henry if we could wait a few more minutes they’d have a table for us inside. Overall our 30 minute wait in the beginning turned into over an hour and I was very displeased about that because it was after 3pm and none of us had eaten since around 9 and I especially was getting hangry. Ok I had bypassed hangry and was firmly planted in much mad starving zone.

Henry was all THANK YOU THANK YOU when the hostess finally summoned us and it was so annoying.

But we had the best seat in the place at all – corner table just the way I like it.

I will say this: ambiance was great. Our server was wonderful. The hearts of palm “fish” tacos I ordered were incredible.

However! We also ordered two starters but our tacos came first (and actually surprisingly fast) and we were told like 3x that our starters would be out soon, then our server was like “let me go check on those starters.” Approx 15 minutes after we finished our tacos, the starters came and Henry joked that they were finishers now but Chooch and I didn’t laugh because that was dumb so you better not have laughed either.

We got some kind of yuca sticks on a pool of nacho (?) sauce which was really good but now what I was expecting. I thought the yuca would be like fries and crispy but they were soft.

And a plate of sweet plantains. I love plantains so much.

Overall it ended up being a good meal but kind of not worth the wait and probably won’t be going back.

We opted to walk back to Drexel after that because I always like to walk after eating a big (to me) meal. MAYBE THAT IS JUST ME. And it’s a really nice walk too. Flat, scenic, and only about 20 minutes.

7:01pm: Checking in to say I’m on my biannual Danity Kane nostalgia tour. This time it’s because Henry said that one of Jennie’s new songs reminds him of a Danity Kane song and I said WILD BC JISOO’S EARTHQUAKE REMINDS ME OF DANITY KANE. (Jennie and Jisoo are both from Blackpink for any anti-kpop person who might themselves reading this).

So now we’re listening to Danity Kane. Fuck you, Diddy. Truly.

Anyway back to Philly – here are some pics from the walk:

I sent this to Corey and he asked me if I wrote that? I mean I’m a Stay but I don’t like them THAT much lol.

The sidewalk was closed at one point and Henry and Chooch were arguing about this. I thought I heard Henry say something about having to go underground so I screamed “we get to go understand?”

Chooch said to him, “Great, now you have her saying that.”

LOL wow.

But seriously I kept asking “when are we going underground though?” And they’d yell in tandem, “We’re not!!”

Then we split up so Henry could go back to the garage to get the car while Chooch and I continued on to his dorm. We were sitting outside when he causally said that I might be able to meet his ROMANIAN friend Bianca!!! She had just made it back to Philly. “Actually there she is right there” and then I fucking spazzed out. “WHAT SHOULD I SAY TO HER??!”

“Oh my god please don’t make this weird. I shouldn’t have said anything,” he groaned as she was quickly approaching.

Turns out it didn’t matter because she came over and they briefly chatted about who else was back and then she went inside.

“Wow she didn’t even look at you,” Chooch laughed.

“Yeah thanks for introducing me!” I cried.

“Maybe she thought you were just another student,” he shrugged.

“OMG REALLY!” I squealed, mood instantly brightened. I mean, we really weren’t sitting that close and I was swinging my legs like a kid on a playground with my telephone purse on my lap. Just ignore my gray hairs and crows feet lol.

Then Henry came back and we had to take Chooch’s shit up to his room and he yelled at Henry repeatedly for stepping on his purple shag carpet which is remarkably clean I must say.

Before we left, I wanted to see the place he’ll be living next year. We couldn’t do much other than go on in the lobby but it’s this tall bitchin’ building behind him:

the final stop was the 7-Eleven near his dorm because he spent all week talking about how they have the best croissants – this location specifically. I mean I’m sure the entire country of France would like to weigh in on that but OK. I wanted to try for myself.

I mean, it was better than the one I had that morning but that was from Sheetz, so. For $1-ish (and for a convenience store) it was decent?

Anyway, it is. Ow 9:46pm and we have another hour left in this drive. Ugh. Signing off.

Skipping Saturday’s action for now and going right to Sunday because there’s less to say and I am lazy. (A lot happened on Saturday!)

I really wanted to have a NICE FAMILY AFTERNOON. Chooch got really into collecting records several years ago so I thought it would be best to offset the misery of “hanging with the parents” by including the incentive of record shopping. He seemed to perk up at that.

I found this random Turkish cafe in Harmar which was on the way to the record shop we were going to in New Kensington. It was called Gino’s Petit something so super confusing because it sounded both Italian and French but then…Turkish. I loved the vibes of the place! It seemed to maybe be a family affair? There was some yelling going on in the kitchen. Our server was wearing a bright orange crop top and leather shorts. I don’t know that this has much to do with anything, but I wanted to remember that lol.

To start, I got Turkish coffee and it was d-i-v-i-n-e.

Crepes seemed to be the main draw there but Chooch and I had just had some of the best crepes in town the day before with Corey, so we both went for something different. Henry and Chooch both got omelettes and I got the TURKISH PLATTER which was like a fancy Lunchables that someone plated for me. The scrambled eggs were mid but I really enjoyed making one-bites out of the tomatoes, cucumbers, feta and mozzarella. And you know I love some olives, boy. They gave me more than what was advertised lol.

Plus, the inexplicable inclusion of french fries – this wasn’t featured in the description so I feel like they were an after thought, maybe some stragglers left in the fry basket or something.

But yo, listen. The best part, and I am closing my eyes in remembrance of the ecstasy my mouth experienced yesterday, was the SUBSTANTIAL SLICES OF MARBLED RYE TOAST which I straight up SOAKED in the provided honey and Turkish jam (it was pureed strawberries in a fruit syrup and I was ready to drink that shit, it was INTOXICATING). Henry and Chooch had to sit there for a full 10 minutes after finishing their meals while I ate each part of my plate. They were so annoyed at my exaggerated savoring of each component, haha.

I would like to go back sometime to try one of the sweet breakfast offerings after seeing plate after plate being shuttled past us to other tables.

Then we went to Preserving Vinyl in New Ken, where I was disgusted at how many Taylor Swift records there were, and the fact that there is vinyl pressed for Halsey of all the crap singers out there, what a waste of resources, if you ask me.

Anyway, I have been out of the record collecting loop for a big and was surprised to see so much Top 40 vinyl.

Then I just felt nostalgic when I saw all of the Joyce Manor, Citizen, etc AND THEN PVRIS STARTED PLAYING and Warped Tour Erin was like, “Knock knock, I’m still in here, you know.”

Chooch got a Daft Punk record (did not know he liked Daft Punk) and an Otis Redding collection.

Then we walked to the other location that’s in an old church which is also a music venue where Armor for Sleep was just playing and I wanted to go but it was the night after we came home from Chicago and Henry was being an Old. And I only know two other people who like(d) Armor For Sleep but:

1. Both live 4+ hours from me in each direction
2. I don’t talk to either of them anymore
3. lol

Anyway, at this place, Chooch got a super old Peter & the Wolf record which was cool just for the cover alone, and an Emerson Lake and Palmer record just because he liked the cover which was also coincidentally wolf-themed and I screamed, “I USED TO LOVE ELP YOU WILL PROBABLY LIKE THIS” and that was probably a mistake, I just swayed him in the opposite direction and am not preparing for him to be like, “So, I listened to that Emerson whatever record and actually it’s garbage.”

I really should have fucking bought this. I reference this movie once every two or three years and no one ever knows.

Then we left and I put on PVRIS for the drive home. What a wholesome afternoon with Chooch, Home from College.

You guys! Chooch came home Thursday night and all feels right in the world (ok I’m gonna walk back on that one and just go with “in our house”).

First! During my lunch break on Friday, we walked to 802 Coffee where I, as per uje, ordered poorly and hated my latte but chooch’s was delightful (it was their dumb March leprechaun menu).

Then we stopped at the library specifically so he could say hi to Robert the Security Guard who always asks me how he is doing and just told me the other day that he keeps him I. His prayers. Get you a library security guard friend, you guys. Robert is such a gem and one of the few good things that came out of the pandemic because I only started talking to him during the very strict book pickups during the early part of COVID.

After work, Janna & Kara came over for pizza and to pepper Chooch with questions about college. So far, the first thing he tells everyone, including Robert, is that he has been playing Spikeball. (Shout out to Corey who got him this for Xmas and Chooch has said repeatedly that it’s one of the best presents he has ever got ok wow, RIP the memory of me presenting him with Hamilton tickets the first time it came to Pgh.)

It was a really chill night and also I liked this beer a lot even though I poured it wrong apparently.

Oh btw when Chooch came home Thursday night, he opened the fridge and yelled in disgust, “There is only beer in here!!!”

TO BE FAIR – we still have a lot of beer left from Chingumas. I put a moratorium on the weekend Duffy’s runs for build-your-own six packs because I was afraid of becoming an alcoholic. Now I will only drink in social situations like before. You heard it here first.

Smirking because approx. three of us asked him who he was texting and if it was this girl that I have latched on to because he let her name slip several times. They’re going to see The Weeknd with two or three other ppl and she bought all the tickets so I had to Venmo her money for him because I’m Mommy Dearest and also because concerts is the one thing I will never deprive him of.

(well, food and love too I guess lol.)

Anyway, it was such a wholesome night of reminiscing about psychos I attracted during the LJ years, game nights of yesteryear, and when Chooch was a baby with a giant head. It was the perfect start to the weekend!

I got this text from Chooch the other day and it cracked me up so bad. His dining hall has an app I guess where everyone can request songs and then apparently you can thumbs up or thumbs down the requests (here you can see Chooch thumbs downed the Earth Wind & Fire song “because my friend requested it,” he said in his defense. Isn’t he so much like me??!! I would be Janna’s biggest thumbs downer if we were part of this dining hall experience).

Anyway, I was stoked to see the SVT song in question because that one IS SO GOOD. I kept sending him different performances of it and he refused to watch (not even the one from Glastonbury! Or maybe it was Lolla Berlin I can’t remember).

Then!! He texted me a picture of the laptop of the girl sitting next to him in one of his classes – she has not one but TWO pictures of T.O.P.’s Squid Game character Thanos and I was like TELL HER YOUR MOM LOVES BIGBANG.

“She doesn’t know who that is,” he said. “She only knows him from squid game” but then he said he didn’t even ask her so WHO KNOWS – this could have been my future kid-in-law but sure. Cool.

Other incidents I think I already logged here:

• Someone was writing STREAM SEVENTEEN LOVE FAME MONEY on white boards and he accused me of breaking into the dorm lol
• He had to critique someone’s essay in his English class and it was ABOUT THE GLOBALIZATION OF KPOP and he said his feedback was “you forgot to mention that bts only sings in English now” lol snap. Apparently it was moot though because she only had one source to cite and it turned out to be some high school kids paper so she had to pick a new topic.

Also speaking of “Thanos,” my old T.O.P. Valentine has been selling thanks to his renewed popularity!

That’s all for me, reporting from the tail end of the longest Monday ever.

Booooo, we took Chooch back to Philly today. Unlike after Thanksgiving, this was a much better experience. Drove straight there. No fighting. Everyone was in a good mood. I helped Chooch take his stuff back to his room and organized his stack of games while I was at it because they were encroaching on his roommate’s side of the room.

Then we went to Nourish for a late vegan lunch and it was gooooood.

Buffalo wings and scallops to start.

Henry’s Philly steak or whatever. (It was fucking magnificent.)

Chooch had a chik’un Philly cheesesteak thing which I tasted after I had already declared mine the best of the bunch and now I’m just not sure because that seasoning, the peppers, the sauce. Sheesh.

LOOK AT THIS THICC BOY ARE U KIDDING. I have never had a sandwich that tall before.

Not even the Inkigayo!

It took me OUT. I ate half and honestly probably could have housed the rest but Henry gave me the “you’ll get sick” speech so I tapped out and am already anticipating polishing it off later tonight on the road.

Chooch walking the streets of Philly in his Seahawks hoodie and Minion crocs. Sigh.

I briefly got to see one of his friends he’ll be living with next year and then he quickly hugged me and that was that…

…until he came running back to the car because he lost his room key in the backseat and found it lodged inside the middle console thingie. Jesus Christ, him and keys, wallets, and debit cards. I can’t.

ETA Sheetz over Wawa everyday all day long. Fuck Wawa, truly.

• “There’s nothing to eat in this house.” x26278344 throughout the day.
• Walking into the kitchen in the morning to a sink full of dirty dishes even though “there’s nothing to eat in this house.”
• Towels all over the bathroom floor.
• Globs of toothpaste in the sink.
• “I’m bored.” x1728383949 throughout the day.
• Maniacal laughter and screaming well into the night as he plays his dumb computer games with his friends.
• Household expenses ⬆️.
• “I want….” x373848484 throughout the day.
• “I need….” x383849494 throughout the day.
• Annoying YouTube videos featuring grown men screaming playing in the background while I’m working.
• “There’s nothing to do.” x9992827737 throughout the day.
• The rise in my blood pressure when he has an eye appt and I give him my insurance and HSA card and he OF COURSE leaves the house without it and then texts me angrily from the doctor demanding me to “take a picture of the insurance card” so I do and then I go back to work and about 30 minutes later he texts again this time needing my HSA card # and because it took me a whopping 10 seconds to retrieve the card, he then texts THIS IS SO EMBARRASSING. Well yeah and good for the doof who WAS PROVIDED BOTH CARDS IN ADVANCE BY A RESPONSIBLE PARENT yet STILL LEFT WITHOUT BOTH.
• A text sarcastically thanking me for not telling him some road is one lane due to construction.
• Being in the middle of writing a work email while a rant about “and why did I have to pay anything anyway, isn’t that what insurance is for?!” is being tossed around behind me. Welcome to America, sonny boy. (It was a $10 copay but still, he was S H O C K E D by this.)
• Being told throughout the day that everything I do, say, an(d like is dumb like it’s my life’s theme song (omg is this how Henry feels lol).

But other than that, it’s been so nice having him home! 😆

Earlier today, I was trying to get Henry to show off his Seventeen member knowledge to Chooch and he refused.

“Then I’m not talking to you for the rest of the day!” I cried.

“Can you not talk to me too?” Chooch asked with faux enthusiasm.

Just in case you were wondering how “absence makes the heart grow fonder” is working out for our family.

Hello from Thanksgiving! It is so weird having Chooch home! I know he has only been away at college since September but it feels so much longer. And just like old times, he didn’t wake up until nearly 1PM and then came downstairs to take up space and complain (OK but mostly because I was trying to make him watch Seventeen videos).

Penelope was rolling around on the floor, playing with her toys, and I effing swear to god she would stop every once in a while and look back at Chooch as if to see if he was watching. It was so cute but I still think she hates him muchly.

Then he went to the Teen Center to interview the lady who runs the place, since she apparently is more interesting than his own mom and makes a better profile subject. Mmmm. He came home long enough to bitch about things and then went to the mall with his friends (and my credit card ughhhh I miss the days of Working Chooch) so Henry and I chilled out with some kpop content and beer. First I tried this Orval Trappist beer because I was convinced that I love monk stuff but this one was NOT GOOD.

“It smells like the pee of a sick person,” I reported as I pushed my glass toward Henry because he is like the sink drain for my beer rejects. Sorry, but I’m not wasting calories on a gross beer??!!

Henry found a Blue Moon in the back of the fridge and thought it would be a good idea to drink that next. Hello, it was probably left over from a party and who knows how old it was. Blue Moon was one of the first and only beers I was able to tolerate back in the day and if we were at a concert or festival and they had it, Henry would always share his with me because I could never drink a full one on my own and we all know how much concert beer costs. Anyway, I went to have a sip and Henry abruptly warned me it tasted bad and tried to stop me. But I was like I WILL BE THE JUDGE OF THAT.

“Ugh!” I grimaced. “It tastes like—”

“Stop! Don’t ruin it,” Henry pleaded.

“–the interior of an old car. Like if you ate an ace bandage.”

“OK great. That’s enough. Thanks.”

LOL, like I was actually done. “It tastes like Camden Park, like if you licked the duct tape holding together one of the rollercoaster seats,” I continued.

I’m pretty sure he dumped it out after that.

I did have one of my Chouffes though and even though it was an IPA, I found it to be quite refreshing and delightful. Even Henry liked it and was waiting for me to split it with him but I said, “Nah, I’ll just drink the whole thing, but thanks.”

😊

(LOL the TV in the background is showing the livestream from Incheon airport where Dispatch was waiting for Seventeen’s arrival and you better believe we sat here and waited with everyone else because we are legit Carats.)

Wait, real time update: I came downstairs and Henry is ROCKING OUT in the kitchen to Seventeen’s “Hot” while making vegan kimchi. Welcome to Thanksgiving at the Kelly-Robbins shanty.

Today has been pretty chill so far (literally) – I went for a walk in the rain this morning which I majorly regerted afterward and will probably be getting sick soon. But other than that, I have just been relaxing (well, after I got my workout in – I’m trying to get back into a fitness routine and of course I chose Thanksgiving week to kickstart that, like a fucking freak), watching some shows on Hulu, adding some Kpop Christmas cards to my Hello Hanguk shop because I am finally feeling a tiny bit creative again after like, years of not.

We got premade vegan Thanksgiving meal kits from Viridis so I’m looking forward to having that tonight. We have never had anything from Viridis before so this was really a shot in the dark but hopefully it’s good? Wish we lived closer to Seitan’s Realm because their T-giving meals looked fire. I love Seitan’s Realm so much.

Um, I guess that’s all! Just trying to use this bitchin’ space for more free-style type of posts because my therapist said that would be good. (Also, I googled “is it unethical to invite therapist to Christmas party” and I’m sure you already know the answer because even I knew the answer even though TV CHARACTERS ARE ALWAYS INVITING THEIR THERAPISTS TO EVENTS but gentle reminder to myself that I am not a TV CHARACTER, just a BROOKLINE ERIN, but anyway – this is how I learned about “transference” and how therapists are required to immediately refer their patients to someone else when that happens. HOW EMBARRASSING.)

Wait one more thing! Henry is back in the kitchen doing cooking things and Stray Kids’ Lose My Breath just came on and I got SO STOKED all over again about seeing them again next year! I told Henry to turn it up and he tried to get Echo to do it but Echo was like, “OK I WILL STOP THE SONG” and then it took him forever to get it to restart so consider the mood killed.

(My last two blog post titles ended in “Things” so I felt compelled to keep with the theme.)

Anyway!!! I woke up so excited yesterday because it was the official “Chooch Comes Home” day! We can’t trust him with basic things so Henry urged him to leave for the airport around noon even though his flight wasn’t until 6ish lol. He texted me around 1:30 to sarcastically thank me because he had made it through TSA super quick and was now faced with about 5 hours to kill hahaha. But I was relieved that he was at least where he needed to be and I could stop worrying about him arriving late and missing his flight.

And yes, I had begun nagging him a full week ago about not forgetting to bring his passport.

Just doing my job!

He randomly sent me this and it cracked me up because ew football. I asked him who took the picture and he said some random guy. Did Chooch actually….ASK for someone to take his picture? Please someone tell me who is this kid, FOR I DO NOT KNOW.

I was practically bouncing myself out of my desk chair all day, in anticipation. I wanted to leave for the airport as soon as I logged off from work at 5:30 but Henry was like HE HAS NOT EVEN BOARDED YET and Chooch was like THE PLANE ISN’T EVEN HERE YET. Boarding was delayed by nearly an hour, which was making me lose my mind.

As soon as Henry saw that the plane was over Harrisburg, he was like, “OK fine, we can leave for the airport now.” YAY YAY YAY YAY!!!

Even though there was an hour delay, he still somehow landed only 10 minutes later than scheduled. I hated almost every single person who walked past us while we were waiting, btw. Just lots of people I could tell that I would hate if I had to:

• live near them
• work with them
• stand in line somewhere with them

Henry was lecturing me about judging books by their cover (OK Mr. Rogers). But then he said, “Look, there’s Mark Madden” and I actually truly do hate that guy, so….see?!?!

(I used to listen to A LOT of sports radio when I was an uber hockey stan.)

As soon as Chooch texted me that he was on the shuttle, I got my phone ready like Dispatch in South Korea waiting for G-Dragon’s airport arrival. Chooch was T H R I L L E D.

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There was no hugging or anything like that – Chooch would never. LOL. And as soon as we got in the car, he read us a literal list of demands. Mostly necessities so I was OK with it, but then of course he tacked on, “and an iPhone 16” at the end, lol. Go away.

“I have to write a profile on someone for English while I’m home—” he started to say, to which I interrupted by shooting my hand into the air and grunting, “Oooh! Ooooh!” and he quickly cut me off with a curt, “Not you.”

WOW.

I guess he is going to ask the lady in charge of the Brookline teen center. Even though I am entirely more interesting, but OK.

I made him pose for a picture by the renovated Chooch Wall and when I said, “Ugh, smile properly!” this is what I got. He thought he did it fast enough that I wouldn’t get it BUT I DID and immediately posted it on Instagram much to his chagrin. :D

He had plans to hang out with his friend Isai but I made him watch the G-Dragon/BIGBANG performance from MAMA first and he actually sat through it and made comments like, “Is Seungri going to come out too?” KNOWING FULL WELL THAT THAT WOULD TRIGGER ME. But then when it was the BANG BANG BANG performance and G-Dragon come out with a new outfit on, Chooch goes, “UGH that is totally how he dressed me that one time!” and I knew exactly what he was referring to because I too made the comparison!

Also, Penelope seems mad that he is home. She was legit glaring at him on the steps last night and I said, “That’s because you’re her abuser!” He’s always telling her she looks like a rat and that she stinks!

I can’t wait to barely see him while he’s home!