My fragile VIP heart is so full today! My ultimate favorites BIGBANG finally had their time to shine last night at Coachella. They were supposed to headline in 2020 and well, we all know what happened in 2020! Then they lost two members and between all of the scandals and backlash, G-Dragon’s hiatus, etc., it seemed like the possibility of a BIGBANG comeback was never going to happen. But it’s their 20th anniversary this year and they made their official comeback at COACHELLA.

IN AMERICA.

The last act to perform on the Outdoor Theater at 10:30PM on a Sunday, not headliners anymore, and still pulled THIS CROWD:

YouTube livestreamed it and I thought for sure my old lady ass was going to have to miss it, but I decided to go to bed early and then Henry woke me up at 1:25AM, saying, “Hey….five minutes.”

My eyelids shot open and I sat up like I was on a string. Grabbed my glasses and went downstairs to wait on the couch for it to start and when I say my heart was RACING.

I of course REALLY got into Kpop toward the end of 2016, and this was essentially the end of BIGBANG’s golden reign. They all began enlisting in the military shortly after. Then T.O.P. had his “scandal” which almost killed him. Then Seungri revealed his true colors with an ACTUAL scandal.

I long ago gave up hope of ever seeing them live. Whether as a 4 person group or 3 at this point, it was seeming less and less likely.

But this! It simultaneously made me feel unwell while also being healed?! I watched the whole hour and fifteen minutes with my hand on my heart, trying not to pass out. Henry watched the whole thing too – we both sat there quietly, no commentary. Then I just started sobbing, lol.

This morning, it was the first thing I thought of when I woke up.  I immediately started scrolling through IG and Threads and was so happy to see how much praise they have been getting. The Kings of KPOP are back. They did that.

“Haru Haru” made me nostalgic for a time in Korea I didn’t actually live through. It BROKE me. Especially without T.O.P. Respect his wishes but jfc I really hope that one day he changes his mind and comes back.

Taeyang and G-Dragon performing “Good Boy”? Stop.

Daesung BRINGING KOREAN TROT TO FUCKING COACHELLA? He did that shit.

I have been so stoked all day (OK, while also slipping into sporadic sob sessions too!) and for the first time in years, I feel that old joy I used to get listening to their songs. Being a VIP is not for the weak, you guys. It’s been a rough 10 years. In fact, several years when Henry and I were in line to see Kang Daniel in Toronto, the girl in front of me asked me who my ult group is. I said “BIGBANG” on the broken wings of a sigh.

“I’m sorry,” she answered somberly.

It’s like that.

But today, I woke up feeling like this is the start of a new era! I poured my coffee in my BIGBANG coffee cup and put on a BIGBANG playlist while sitting down to work. I smiled like a goof while doing my boring work.

BIGBANG FOREVER.

Welp, I had therapy today and wasn’t planning on mentioning it, but I ultimately shared with my therapist the agonizing “what even is this feeling??” that has overcome me since hearing about Mark Lee’s departure from NCT last Friday. She helped me understand that it’s not weird or dumb, this emotion that I can’t pinpoint, but it really does signify the end of a golden era in my life and that it makes sense that I am feeling this grief-but-not-grief because no one died unless you count a past version of myself.

Please indulge me here, but I thought it would help to go back through the pictures Henry took of me at every NCT / Super M / KCON concert where I literally felt like my best, most happiest, purest self. NCT has been with me for years now and I really feel like while all the members were growing up, I was growing up in a way too by putting more even space between the Erin of Now with the Erin of Then, which wasn’t a good Erin.

KCON 2017!

Not me wearing a Pierce the Veil shirt to my first Kpop concert lol. June 2017!

That’s NCT127 in the red.

KCON 2018!

Saw them again at KCON 2018!

This was back when Winwin was still with them. </3

SUPER M 2019!

20     

NCT 217 in Newark 10/22!

Mark Lee on a bus stop ad </3

I spent so much $$$ on my ticket that Henry had to wait until the day of and get a nosebleed seat for himself. This was the selfie he sent me from his literal last row seat haha.

We stayed afterward too and waited for their vans to leave the venue just to get a split-second glance of them through the tinted windows, it was so much fun.

This was when I had FULLY accepted that in addition to VIP and SHAWOL (KPOP fandom names, don’t try to understand) I was now an NCTzen.

NCT DREAM 2023 in Chicago

This was the one that really sent me. NCT 127 had been to the States numerous times but the Dreamies never had. Until spring of 2023. Again, I threw down some serious cash on my ticket and I will live the rest of my life having not even a single regret. This was one of the best concerts and nights of my life. I bonded with the other NCTzens around me. I saw my bias Renjun for the first time ever. I cried so hard but also smiled so big and screamed so loud that I gave myself a headache.

That’s  me on the screen, smiling a genuine smile which doesn’t happen very often (I’m the President of the Fake Smile Club).

This was one of the happiest days for me and I think about it a lot.

This was when I escorted Henry to his seat, lol.

NCT EXHIBITION IN SEOUL 2024!!

OK this doesn’t really count as “seeing them live,” but there was an NCT127 exhibition happening at the DDP when we were in Korea for our “marriage mission.” Chooch was off Pokemon Go’ing so I made Henry go to it with me and I loved every fucking second of it.

I got this delightful mug in the gift shop at the end. They had one for every member and I got Haechan’s of course because he’s my ult NCT bias (tied with Ten who btw also just announced his departure from SM although he is allegedly still going to participate in team activities with NCT and WayV – we’ll see) but I wanted to get one of each, honestly.

Another fun fact is that we were in Korea for NCT Dream’s comeback, so I got to buy their new album from the SM Store and watch their video FROM SEOUL. Short of actually seeing an NCT concert in Korea, that was next level for me. (Although Chooch and I did see one of the Dreamies in 2019 – Jeno – when he was hosting The Show and we attended a live taping of it!)

NCT DREAM 2024 – LONG ISLAND

They didn’t have Renjun with them for this tour and that made me sad but I was still grateful to see them again!

There’s this inside joke within the Kpop fandom that no matter what the concert is, you are guaranteed to see at least one neobong (NCT lightstick) in the crowd and I have definitely found this to be true! It’s funny because now it’s crossing boundaries into non-kpop territory too.

Henry sits alone – again LOL.

JINGLE BALL 2024 DETROIT!

One of my work friends tried to talk me out of buying tickets for this since I had just seen NCT Dream 2 mths prior BUT THERE WAS A CHANCE THAT RENJUN WOULD BE THERE.

AND HE WAS.

Henry got to sit with me this time. I used my Capital One card for the presale and got really great seats.

This was on TV as well and some of my friends were like THAT GROUP YOU LIKE IS ON MY TV RIGHT NOW. YEAH BOY!

I was so grateful to get to see Renjun again but now, in hindsight, this would be the last time I’d see NCT Dream with all 7 members. JFC that stings.

NCT 127 3/25 CHICAGO!

I ALMOST DID NOT GET TICKETS FOR THIS TOUR. Some of the members were in the military. One was kicked out and we do not speak of him. I almost said, “Well, I have already seen 127 three times, I can pass on this one.” But then I was like, “Hello, what kind of shit talk is that for an NCTzen!?” So, I got the tickets. AND THIS WOULD END UP BEING THE LAST TIME I SEE MARK, MAYBE AT ALL.

Henry sits alone again LOL.

We made a bunch of pins to give out as freebies.  This is just a few – there were at least 100! <3

MARK.

Literally. The end of an era. I’m really sad.

So, I woke up at the crack of dawn this morning to the news of Mark Lee leaving SM and halting all NCT activities. First, I saw it from his own Instagram – you know it’s not going to be good when the post is a picture of a handwritten letter. I still didn’t fully understand the context – what was he apologizing for? Was there a scandal? Did he get hurt?

But then right after, I saw SM’s statement confirming that they had mutually decided to part ways after 10 years. Mark Lee! Literally carried 4 teams on his back at one time. The backbone of NCT. Haechan’s bestie.

It’s no wonder why there were so many videos of the NCT Dream members straight up sobbing during the finale of their Dream Show run in Seoul – we all thought they were just sad because that era had ended, but no, they knew. They knew it was their last time performing with Mark. Ughhhhh.

Sorry to be MELODRAMATIC, the man isn’t dead, but yo…NCT has been my antidepressant for YEARS. They were also at the first Kpop concert I ever went to – KCON 2017! I feel blessed that I got to see Mark so many times with NCT127, NCT Dream, and even – gloriously – Super M. I will support him no matter what, especially since it sounds like he made this decision for himself and he has admitted that he is scared of what’s to come.

FUN FACT, back when Chooch was a Kpop stan with me, Mark was his bias.

This is true with bands of any genre because aging is aging no matter how you slice it, but there is something especially jarring about watching Kpop groups grow up. There is little in life that makes me feel as old and panicked about time & mortality as going through an entire life cycle of a Kpop group and realizing that you’re reaching the inevitable expiration date. I hate it so much. I fear that NCT won’t survive this and their current & future military enlistments. I mean, I thought that all of the viral “NCT Dream crying” videos from this week were because they knew Haechan was due to enlist soon. Not this. (BTW, Mark is Canadian and exempt from military enlistment in Korea so Henry and I are always talking about how with NCT Dream, at least they would still have him, Renjun and Chenle (both Chinese), and NCT127 would have him, Johnny (American) and Yuta (Japanese), but I guess that is not going to be the case after all.

This is making me spiral out for so many strange, personal, possibly neurotic reasons. I have attachment issues (bigly). I take everything so hard. And it’s such a weird thing to be like, “Hi, I’m upset, can I talk to you about it?” to anyone other than Henry, who has been bracing for the fall out and of course it happens when he leaves to go to Lowe’s and I’m here alone, thinking about all of my favorite NCT memories, how I never got my NCT Dream tattoo (but really need to), and just how they have always been my cozy/comfort listen. Tears incoming.

This will always be one of my favorites:

And before I end this: A BIG FUCK YOU TO SM. I know it’s been said that this was a genuinely respectful departure and not the typical LEGAL NOTICE that these agencies are also putting out in these situations, I just feel like they could treat their artists better. They worked this man to the fucking bone for 10 years.

ETA: I just heard someone say that Mark chose himself and you know, TRUE. That takes away some of the hurt knowing that Mark is going to be able to do what HE wants to do now (hopefully starting with a vacation and lots of rest!!).

I love Mae Martin. Like, lovelovelove Mae Martin. Ever since watching their show “Feel Good” on Netflix several years ago, I’ve been enchanted by their nervous comedic delivery and pure adorability. When I saw they were coming to Pittsburgh on their The Possum* comedy tour, I was all in. Originally, I was going to go alone, but then Henry watched “Wayward” with me and I sent him some of their late night show interviews, and he was on board too.

*(SPOILER, THERE WERE NO POSSUMS AT THE SHOW.)

I thought I lost this jacket!

Having Chooch home this week has been so great – for us, anyway, LOL. It’s been pretty annoying for him, like when I made him take pictures of Henry and me before we left.

LOL, what faces.

Then, to further Chooch’s annoyance, we made him drive us downtown to the Byham Theater so that we wouldn’t have to either take the T or pay exorbitant parking prices. This was actually almost as funny as the Mae Martin show because Chooch was SO PISSED IMMEDIATELY when I put on NCT127 at high volumes and then Henry was nagging him for driving too fast through the church parking lot across from our house, and then!! Henry was digging around the backseat of the car (we make him sit in the back when Chooch is driving, LOL) for his hat and Chooch was like, “Oh well, I’m not going back” but then Henry was like, “NO, I THINK I HAD IT ON THE ROOF OF THE CAR!!!!” and then I realized it was his Canada hat, so I said, “Oh, you HAVE to turn around then!”

So, Chooch grudgingly looped around Brookline and went back to the parking lot.

“THERE IT IS!” I screamed, while Chooch was breaking his fingers in his intensity to get NCT127’s “Sticker” off the radio.

You can hear a clip of my unhinged cackling in the background, but it actually went on for so much longer – that irate flourish with which he snatched his lost hat SENT ME.

“Anything else you’d like to report missing?” Chooch said drolly after peeling out of the parking lot before Henry even had the car door shut.

“YOU,” Henry spat.

This of course made me lose it all over again and after another full minute, Chooch side-eyed me and said, “OK, it wasn’t that funny, you can stop now.”

AND THAT JUST MADE ME LAUGH LOUDER as I reached over to crank the volume on NCT’s 2 Baddies (another of Chooch’s most hated songs).

It was only about a 10 minute drive to downtown, with Henry and Chooch bickering the entire way over directions. Oh, I was wheezing. I missed this so much.

I’m surprised Chooch actually let the car come to a complete stop before booting us out at a curb.

I realized that I hadn’t been to the Byham since pre-Covid when my pal Michelle and her daughter were in town and invited me to the TROCKADERO BALLET with them!

It was such a great night, even when Henry the Doof dropped his phone under the seats in front of us (thankfully it was during intermission) and made me hold his beer while he gently tapped the shoulder of the woman in front of us to tell her he had to retrieve his phone which had landed near her purse and didn’t want her to think he was trying to rob her. She was super impressed by his politeness and commented on the gentleness of his shoulder tap, which irritated me because I hate when Henry’s inner feminist is on display and stealing my spotlight.

Sigh.

Her partner seemed equally impressed and I was like OMG WE GET IT, HENRY IS AN ALLY.

I wanted to pop into the conversation with a reminder that I have had to correct Henry’s misuse of pronouns when referencing Mae Martin all night, BUT THEN HIS BEER SPILLED ON MY LEG AND PULLED ME AWAY FROM THE SCENE.

Aside from Henry shifting uncomfortably in his seat all night, miming his discomfort and earlier diatribe of how poorly-designed theater seats are (maybe it was because people weren’t fat asses back then who ate king-sized Twix during shows, HENRY), it was a really great night. We had good balcony seats, everyone was respectful, and there were lots of laughs! Mae Martin is a treasure. Canada,  you produce the best people, I swear to god. I am fully in my Canada-era right now, I think. I mean, we came home and I forced Chooch to watch more episodes of the Nirvana the Band web series, which he said I’ve ruined for him and made it feel like homework, LOL.

The first half of Mae’s show was stand-up (I could have listened to them talk all night – they have such a nervously hilarious vibe that I am so attracted to!), then after intermission, their friend Matt came out for some improv (this was Henry’s favorite part of the night) and then Mae ended the show by performing several songs. Yes, they can act, make people laugh, do improv, sing, play guitar, AND they just taught themselves how to play harmonica after getting inspo from the Bob Dylan biopic.

I need, need, need Mae Martin and Matt Johnson to work on something together. PLEASE. My two favorite Canadians. <3

Anyway, it just felt really good to laugh so genuinely all night, starting with the drive down there courtesy of Chooch’s surliness and Henry’s rooftop hat mishap. This was almost one of those events that come up in my feed and I go to myself, “That could be fun” and then take no action. I’m glad that I bought tickets though! I had that niggling sensation that I would get FOMO if I didn’t. I think I was right to trust the niggle! I think I’m doing pretty good in my mission to “get out there more,” as prescribed by my therapist.

Afterward, Chooch was waiting for us in the parked car a few streets over, sitting there reading a book (The Martian) like a real dad. He went to the bookstore and visited his friend at work and then grudgingly came back (in time!) to retrieve us. What a sweetheart.

I can’t explain fully what my deal is with Mama Steve’s, but I just really super love it so much. I was actually more excited about going here than Busch Gardens, and it has absolutely nothing to do with the food. It is all about the outdated ambiance for me. Please do not ever renovate, Mama Steve and Fam.

I was positively shaking with giddy anticipation. It was just as I had remembered!

Henry and Chooch were not even a fraction as stoked as I was. They’d have preferred the free hotel breakfast, I’m sure.

I’m not even going to pretend like this is the best food ever (although I’m the wrong person to ask since I’m very limited to what I can eat from this menu) but it’s just the fact that I truly get such frivolous joy from eating while swathed in a palette of baby blue. I mentioned this in my first ever Mama Steve’s blog post from…2021?? But it reminds me so much of my Pappap’s living room and dining room, color-wise. I feel instantly comforted every time I’m there!

Chooch was so over it before we were even seated, me taking pictures of everything like it was my first time there. But I was just so excited about everything in that moment! Chooch was back with us AND we were at Mama Steve’s!? Both of these things happening at once?!

I’m fairly certain that I took this exact picture the last time we were there but oh well. I love the coffee cups and I love the table tops and that’s that.

I became outrageously incensed because Henry’s meat-fists ruined this picture and you better believe I cried openly about it.

“Oh no,” Chooch said drily. “It’s too bad that nothing you wanted a picture of is still there. Like the tables. And that wall. Gone.”

NIRVANNA THE BAND THE SHOW THE MOVIE!!!!!!!!! Chooch said that I actually made him hate it with my zealous enthusiasm and wow, no one could have predicted that.

Anyway, in mock-excitement, Chooch blurted out, “Wow, 10 silver dollar pancakes?! Maybe that’s what I’ll get.” And then, “How big do you think they are?”

“Uh, silver dollar-sized??” Henry answered, incredulity pooling in the corners of his mouth. It was a whole thing. You had to be there.

That’s our server back there! Her name was either Lemon or Lenora. But she truly seemed to get a kick out of us and left our table chuckling to herself every time. When she took Chooch’s order and he hit her with the swerve of “vegetarian omelet,” she acted REALLY SHOCKED and goes, “OK! Vegetarian omelet….I thought you were gonna get the pancakes!” and then as she walked away, she said out loud, “I heard him say ‘10 silver dollar pancakes!‘” and then she chuckled so hard to herself. It was the cutest.

I don’t know what was going on behind my pancakes, but Henry clearly must have had the gall to ask Chooch to pass him the pepper and Chooch can’t complete any task without mouthing off in one way or another.

Anyway! I asked Henry if he would eat some pancakes if I ordered them because 4 p-cakes is too much for me. He said sure so I got a stack of blueberry and then immediately doused it with blueberry (or “blueberp” as it appeared on the carafe thing) syrup. “Wow, first you get my least favorite pancakes – blueberry – and then cover it with more blueberry,” Henry sighed. I almost peed my pants laughing because WHY WON’T MY BRAIN RETAIN THE FACT THAT HENRY HATES BLUEBERRY?!

Every time we go, we are usually only one of 2 or 3 tables. Lemon even told us not to hurry when she brought our check because, “as you can see, I don’t have any other tables,” she said with her patented chuckle. But then the hostess said, “The bus hasn’t come yet,” and Lemon chuckled some more so we weren’t sure if there really was a tour bus on the way or what? I mean, it’s freaking Williamsburg so I have to imagine that Mama Steve’s must get waves of crowds. I think every time we’ve been there, it’s been a weekday morning.

I look exhausted and my hair was wet. But I was so happy to be there! Henry looks like my prisoner.

And now for a series of pictures taken by Chooch which is always scary.

This was after Lemon busted us posing for pictures and did her “Pee Wee-watching-the-movie-about-himself-at-the-end-of-Pee Wee’s Big Adventure” chuckle.

Genuinely happy with a bellyful of blueberry pancakes from Mama Steve’s very own kitchen. Why does Henry look like he’s in the middle of psychological break, though. Like someone just put him out to pasture and told him to look at the flowers.

Oh! Speaking of the kitchen, we were desperately trying to figure out what they were listening to back there. It just sounded like the same several notes over and over. Chooch said it sounded like Nine Inch Nails because, “all I can hear is screeching and that’s what it sounds like.” I could see where he was coming from, but the cooks in the kitchen were a middle-aged black man and an old white lady. I mean, who I am to judge but they didn’t seem like the demographic for NIN.

My guess was that it was some sinister classical piece, something that would be used in an old horror movie. It was actually chilling. Henry even walked past the kitchen on purpose on his way to the restroom to try to get a better listen, but he said it only sounded worse the closer he got. We shouldn’t have sent the one person in our party who is hard of hearing.

(I actually really want it to have been NIN though because it just makes no sense, similar to my love for Mama Steve’s.)

Chooch always does this thing where he ultra-zooms on Henry when he’s supposed to be taking pictures of us, so I have a whole-ass collection of horrifying Henry close-ups on my phone. I sent this one to Alyson because it also happened to be her BIRTHDAY! She was excited because it was the live version of it, so she got to see Henry hee-hawing in motion.

And then we started our 6 hour drive home (well, first we had to stop at the Goodwill down the street from Mama Steve’s because Chooch’s latest obsession is starting a DVD collection). This was Henry whenever he was relocated to the backseat when it was Chooch’s turn to drive:

Wow. The end.

P.S. The last time we were at Mama Steve’s!

Williamsburg to Orlando: A Live Blog

The first Saturday of March was pretty great, not gonna lie. It was in the 70s here in Pittsburgh which definitely lent a hand to th eongoing battle against winter depression. March is so underrated as far as I’m concerned – maybe I’m biased because 2 of the 3 times we went to Korea happened to be in March so I can’t help but think of my favorite place on Earth while anxiously awaiting the arrival of spring. That sounds so corny—who am I, an author of books of inspirational quotes for purchase at Turnpike rest stops??

Anyway! We had a few plans for Saturday so it was nice to get out of the house. First, we had to pick up an order of seitan from Self-Reliant Seitan at the Bloomfield farmer’s market. I didn’t feel like getting out of the car but I was able to zoom in and take this picture to send to Chooch of Henry being creepy. “Ew, I just heard him do HYUCKHYUCKHYUCK laugh” I texted Chooch, who then sent back a “gross” in response.

Then we went straight to the Monroeville Mall for the ENHYPEN concert film. I love love love this trend because it’s fun to get to relive concerts that we went to but up close. Henry and I went to see ENHYPEN on this past tour in Long Island, but this was specifically their stadium performance in Tokyo – a huge deal for a Kpop group that’s only 4-5 years old.

This is the first time I’ve ever had a use for this Hipstamic filter! Anyway, that’s Jungwon, my bias in ENHYPEN. It was such a good time but I have some grievances to air:

• Henry kept falling asleep and denying it (he genuinely like ENHYPEN – I know there are people who can’t fathom that he actually enjoys this stuff but oh well, be miserable – so I’m chalking it up to old age) which was pissing me off because these tickets were $20 each since it was a “special event” I guess, so that’s an expensive nap, Old Man.
• The downside to liking these newer/younger groups is that the fans keep getting younger too so the theater was full of middle school girls, including the two behind us who:
  • never shut their fucking bitch mouths
  • kicked the backs of our seats like we were on an economy flight to pre-pubescent hell

I did have a moment where my quiet, internalized rage grew so powerful that I seriously thought I was going to have to get up and walk out rather than be THAT KAREN going viral on TikTok for fighting a 60 year old narcoleptic and two 11 year olds at a kpop movie in a near-defunct mall in the Zombie Capital of the World.

Viral video averted, we then went to the nearby Squatch Brewing for an afternoon beer and Henry ordered at the wrong part of the bar even though I pointed out the cordoned off section with the giant ORDER HERE sign hanging above it. He refused to move though so I left him alone at the bar and got a seat at a table the farthest from the bar because I didn’t want to be associated with him.

I had a RED ALE. It was actually very nice and refreshing.

Henry got a flight – did I mention in here that I’m over fights? Every time I get one, I end up feeling SO DRUNK and not great – I don’t know if it’s the mixing of different types of beers/alcohol levels?? I’m not a drinker in general so my tolerance is pretty low (even at home, I usually will pour myself the tiniest amount from a can/bottle and then give Henry the rest – sometimes I really just want a sip) so I truly have no idea what I’m talking about but I have noticed that now if I just order one full pour of one beer, I am totally OK for the rest of the day instead of coming home and collapsing in bed at 3PM with the spins (this happened several times after hanging out with my sister! I can’t do that shit anymore).

It was an OK place. Kind of out of the way for us so I can’t foresee going back anytime soon. But at least it earned me another stamp in my stupid book – I haven’t gotten a new one since December when I finally got my 20th! Now that I know this book doesn’t expire, I have had no fire under my ass to seek out new stamps. (I do want to get to 30 though because there’s a prize for that one too.)

In my ENHYPEN concert shirt :)

I took this on the way home because I liked how my nails looked #vanity

Not too much else to report from Saturday other than we watched another MATT JOHNSON movie because I’m on a giddy mission to becoming a MATT JOHNSON COMPLETIONIST. We watched Operation Avalanche and I’m not just saying this because I’m a ho for MAT JOHNSON but it was fucking incredible. Literally, this man’s brain makes him so freaking hot. He is a genius. The best part is that Henry is also strapped into the passenger seat for my wild descent into Matt Johnson madness and I love that for him, and for me. Get you a person who goes along with all of your obsessions and will basically be your GIRL TALK sounding board when you want to sit here and glaze a Canadian all day long for having high emotional intelligence and huge arms.

This is basically just a Nirvanna the Band / Matt Johnson fan site now. I just saw it in the theater for the THIRD TIME last night (after I said I didn’t want to go to the Waterfront on a Friday, that’s how you know this is Big Time Fixation) – I cannot recommend it enough. As I have already ranted: Go in cold, don’t watch trailers, don’t google. Then come home and binge everything they’ve done as Nirvanna the Band up until this point. Obsessed. Bought the poster. Dying to go back to Toronto.

There were these guys sitting at the bar near us beforehand and they ran into someone they knew who asked what they had come to see.  One of them giddily said, “Nirvanna, for the second time!” to which the other guy responded, “Nice! I saw it three times!” I could feel Henry tensing up next to me, knowing that what I actually heard in my deranged mind was “Paging Erin Buttinsky, Mrs. Buttinsky” which caused me to nearly fall out of my seat in my desperation to blurt out, “ITS OUR THIRD TIME TOO!!!” throwing three fingers wildly into the air like I was celebrating my third gold Olympic medal in the game of Obsessing Over Niche Things. (And fuck the White House invitation!)

The guys weren’t dude-bros so they didn’t mind my outburst and instead celebrated along with me for a second. (Maybe that’s me romanticizing the scene as usual.) “Yeah, Canadian pride!” one of them said to me and I felt like I was part of something.

When I get this fixated on random things, I start to wonder if I really am on the spectrum, somewhere, maybe riding it side-saddle down at one end. Because I will get these obsessions and then there is no room in my head and heart for anything else. Like, I’m at work wanting to spam my friends on Teams about this knowing full well that none of them will give a shit.

Anyway, if you catch me around town wearing thick headbands it’s because I belong to the Church of Matt Johnson now. Sorey. (Henry agreed that Matt Johnson can be my free pass, so Toronto here I come.)

I got it BAD. My NTBTSTM poster came today and Henry, supporter of all of my obsessions, tucked it preciously into its frame immediately, took a nap, woke up and made my dinner, went grocery shopping, came home and hung it in Chooch’s ex-room. I am so delighted! I can’t wait for Chooch to come home for spring break and see it LOL.

Another sign of Henry’s support: we originally had plans to see One Battle After Another at the Hollywood tomorrow night but Henry said, “OR. We can go see Nirvanna the Band the Show the Movie again.” I think that’s what we’re going to do and I’m giddy about it! (Probably not tomorrow night thought because I loathe going to the Waterfront on a Friday night.)

In the meantime, I have spent most of my life these days consuming every Matt Johnson interview I can find on YouTube while gushing to Henry about how amazing I think he (Matt Johnson, not Henry) is and Henry calmly agrees with me every time.

I guess Henry’s got it bad too.

The other night, I was lying in bed and thinking about the small handful of movies that I have latched on to so hard that I saw them more them once at the theater (this applies only to new releases at the time, and not classics like Halloween, The Lost Boys, Suspiria, etc. which I have watched a thousand trillion times at home). Of course, I made Henry try to guess (and then also Chooch, via text, after midnight, who takes these guessing games VERY SERIOUSLY). Henry did better, but Chooch required so many clues that I was practically resorting to sending him pictures of the official movie posters.

I know you are just CHOMPING AT THE BIT to know, pens poised on your NOTES ABOUT ERIN scratch paper, anticipating the super hifalutin’ classic cinephile picks to come.

Well, brother, it ain’t that, lol.

The first one will take us back to 1995, throw on a flannel and daisy choker, curl your bangs to a crisp ‘cuz we’re going to see CASPER, motherfuckers.

Keri (ugh, why does she have to come up twice in a week) and I went to see this once and afterward, we looked at each other, a moment of mutual understanding: we were smitten and knew we had to see it again.

Here’s the thing though – Keri, like normal girls, was into it because of Devon Sawa.

Me? I had the hots for the dad – PLAYED BY BILL PULLMAN.

And yes, we went back to the theater to see it again. I even bought the soundtrack! No regrets.

Two years later, my favorite actor was the imitable John Cusack. Still fucking love him to this day. 1997 was a big year for him and it had me double-viewing TWO of his movies in the theater! Sadly, I believe all of these were seen with my then-boyfriend, Psycho Mike.

GROSS POINTE BLANK – amazing, no defense needed. Now I want to rewatch it soon because I haven’t seen it in YEARS.

And the last movie is the one that usually really throws people off because it doesn’t make sense to anyone who knows me, and that movie is CON AIR. LOL, aside from Mr. Cusack and Steve Buscemi, I can’t explain the grip this movie had on my figurative balls but I have watched it so many times over the years and it never gets old to me. It’s like my Die Hard, I guess, and Chooch just thinks this is the dumbest thing ever and refuses to watch it (his loss). It comes up so often in my life too! In fact, we were recently playing that stupid Hum the 80s and 90s Songs games during one of Chooch’s last college breaks and my song was LEANN RIMES HOW DO I LIVE and I was so mad that no one guessed it, and I was screaming IT WAS IN CON AIR!!!!

Ugh.

I also want to note that the second  time Mike and I went to the theater to see this (I remember it was the Whitehall theater which is no longer there!), my mom had given me some of her WATER PILLS because I was trying to lose weight so yes, give your 18 year old some of your prescription pills (this has been my whole life since 6th grade you guys, frantically trying to lose weight). Anyway, I spent the whole movie running to the bathroom to pee so I’ll let you decide if this actually counts as “seeing a movie twice in the theater” when I spent most of the time seeing the inside of the bathroom stall.

If I dig ouy my journal from 1997, I’m sure I will have an entry about how Mike and I fought on the way home from one of these viewings because, knowing him, he was accusing me of being a whore and fucking John Cusack.

This is all a boring and pointless lead up to tell you that last night, I added a fourth movie to this list, and it is arguably the best movie on the list:

YES, we went to see it again! I am so obsessed with this movie, the lore, Matt Johnson, Toronto (always obsessed with Toronto though, one of my fave cities ever) that I have been watching interviews, the web series, guest spots, anything I can find ever since seeing it last week and especially now that we know some behind the scenes stuff, I felt compelled to go see it again. When I mentioned this to Henry the other night, he was like YEAH I’D GO SEE IT AGAIN! Luckily, AMC was still showing it this week.

My takeaways:

• It was just as delightful the second time around and especially fun looking for the things we missed on our initial watch.
• I’m glad we saw it in a little independent theater for our first watch though because it’s a charming film and the venue mattered, in my opinion. This is a movie meant to be seen in an art house / indie theater, preferably with a crowd of college-aged film nerds. The crowd last night was fine and there was LOLing but it wasn’t as festive-feeling and contagious as the night at the Harris Theater.
• I would dump Henry for Matt Johnson, let’s go, eh. Sore-y, Henry.
• I want to go back to Toronto STAT.
• All of my framed posters at home are concert/festival related but I’m about to make this the first movie poster adorning my walls.
• The second time around was obviously stripped of the shock value, but it made it feel like we were part of an inside joke.

I can’t recommend this movie enough, but I also can’t recommend it to everyone because I KNOW there are people who would be like “wtf why did you make me watch that, it was dumb.” But damn, the humor in this might not be for you but it is 100% for me, like just thinking about some of it, I’m on the verge of crazy-tears. It re-wired my brain or something, I was so bored and this invigorated me, electrocuted my mind with happiness. I don’t have the words! Also, if you can, don’t watch the trailer, don’t WIKI it, don’t LOOK ANYTHING UP. Just go see it. That’s how we initially went into it and it was the right move. We had NO FUCKING CLUE what we were watching, and it literally felt like – as a hat tip to the movie – lightning in a bottle. Just pure joy and excitement, like we really witnessed THAT.

If anything, now I just feel sad knowing that I can never see it again for the first time, and also because RIP Orbitz.

Slowly getting to through the camera photos from our Romania trip. I simultaneously am so relieved to almost be wrapping up these recaps but also – so sad. It really was one of the best times of my life and I will never forget it! (How can I with a vacation journal, 1000 pictures, and approximately 75 blog posts about it? Yes, I know – I’m exhausting. Try being me!!)

Anyway, these are the only pictures from Sighisoara we took with the camera, mostly just of the cemetery and the cafe where I got the best pie of my freaking life!

<3 you, Sighisoara!

We were just watching some travel YouTuber’s video the other night of the best/cheapest places to travel in Europe in 2026 and Sighisoara was on his list. I was happy but also like bro, don’t tell everyone the secret!

This was right outside the entrance to the cemetery.

The Scholar’s Steps from above! I loved those steps.

Cemeteries are basically my whole personality.

OK back to listening to the Pens game on my phone!

She sent me four cans of G-Dragon’s limited edition Peaceminusone highballs! They were only just released in the US after debuting last spring in Korea and of course, there is nowhere even remotely close to Pittsburgh that is stocking them. But Veronica lives in LA and was able to snag a case of both the black and red versions and sent me two of each, plus stickers!!!

I actually screamed, I’m not even going to lie. You can ask my cat Penelope. I stopped everything, nearly sliced my hand with a knife while savagely carving the box open, and then immediately took pictures to send to Henry and Chooch. Chooch of course just said, “Wow. Good job” because he is so over my Beatles-level mania for G-Dragon.

I mean, honestly, G-Dragon could put his name on a rock and I would set an alarm to wake up at 3AM in order to join a queue to try to buy one, and then pay more in shipping than I paid for the actual item without even hesitating because GD got me like that. He makes me stupid. Er.

Stupider.

Margie the Bad Influence told me to just crack one open right then and there while I was still logged on to work but I had restraint. Mainly because I wanted to wait for Henry. We decided to save it until tonight and I thought about it all day because I am so lame!

We just tried the black can for now.

First of all, the tab is so cool – I love that it pulls off in a circle! And there is a real lemon slice inside!

OK look, it could taste like actual squirrel piss and I would have rated it on a 5 on Untappd, but this was genuinely delicious. Crisp and refreshing, lemon-y and fizzy. It actually gave me Smirnoff Ice vibes, a little bit? And if you knew me in, say, 2000, you know that was my drink of choice at McCoy’s and at home, which was obvious if you see pictures of me back then with my big bloated face.

This has a French burgundy Sauvignon Blanc base so it feels fancier than a Smirnoff Ice, for sure. Plus, the power of GD’s branding.

I’m excited to try the red one next, maybe this weekend!

God, I love G-Dragon so much. Thank you, Veronica! I am always so grateful for our paths crossing on Instagram all those years ago. <3

(Obvi I have to keep the cans and do art with them.)

One thing about me that hasn’t changed since probably 2003 or 2004 is that I will NOT LEAVE THE HOUSE ON NYE. You can’t make me. I like to stay in, be cozy, not get social anxiety, and most importantly – avoid drunk drivers.

Plus, we got some heavy snow this year on NYE so even more reasons to stay in! Chooch was happy because we played some dumb game he got for Christmas called Hitster which he quickly realized he hated because I was REALLY GOOD AT IT. Basically, you can a QR code on a card and when the song plays, you have to correctly place it in the timeline you’ve created from other cards you’ve won. It gets progressively harder the more cards you accumulate.

You can also win a “token” if you correctly guess the name of the song and artist. Chooch made fun of me bigly because one of his songs was “Let it Be” and he goes, “Oh the hit Let It Be by Corsby Stills and Nash” as a throwback to when Corey and Kevin were here Thanksgiving weekend. I don’t think I wrote about this but it has been HAUNTING ME ever since so here goes.

Deep breath.

Exhale.

OK, we were playing that Songs of 80s and 90s Humming Game that I love so much. One of mine was “any song by Madness.” Um, OK I only know the ONE Madness song and I thought, “OK I have this in THE BAG.” So I started humming it and NO ONE was getting it. Everyone eventually gave up and when I said, “Our House by Madness” no one knew the song and I was aghast. But here is where it goes south.

“Yeah, it’s their cover of the Beatles’ song,” I said with full confidence. Chooch and Kevin were both immediately questioning this and I was like, “Yeah, the Beatles.”

We moved on with the game.

But two days later, I shot up in bed and cried out, “The Beatles didn’t sing Our House! That was CROSBY STILLS AND NASH!” I texted both Henry and Chooch about this, in a state of PANIC because if you know me, I am like half-savant when it comes to music things.

“Wow, good job,” Chooch replied, and then Henry admitted that he was thinking to himself that night, “What is she talking about??”

But then a few days went by and I was still emotionally self-flagellating over this when the actual Madness song popped into my head and I said out loud to no one, “THAT WASN’T EVEN A COVER, THAT WAS THEIR OWN FUCKING SONG, WHAT WAS I EVEN THINKING?!?!!?!?”

Am I losing it? Is this early on-set dementia? Was it just because I was drinking a strong Belgian beer and off my game??

Anyway, Chooch will never let me live me this down, hence his little Crosby, Stills and Nash quip.

I originally put on Seoul’s countdown and Chooch goes, “This was like 12 hours can we please just watch the US one, thanks.” W O W. Penelope was walking by and stopped abruptly to stare at the TV, which cracked me up.

Then she continued watching from the table.

Anyway, anti-climactic as always. Happy fucking New Year, etc.

But then for some reason, I brought up the Miz again I GUESS HE HAS BEEN HEAVY ON MY MIND SINCE LOSING HIS MATCH AT  THE DUMB WWE HOLIDAY THING ON SATURDAY and it inspired me to put on The Challenge compilation videos and Henry and I sat there until after 1AM reminiscing, saying things like, “What was his name? Abram I think?” and being totally mesmerized by CT (the best to ever do it, IMO). There was one clip of CT with Adam from The Real World Paris and I was like, “His dad was someone….but I can’t remember now.” Lionel Richie kept coming to me but I knew it wasn’t him. Eventually, I gave up and Googled and his dad is one of the founding members of The Commodores, so practically Lionel Richie! But it also made me laugh because one of the songs Henry got earlier that night during Hitster was “Easy” by the Commodores but he said Lionel Richie so we didn’t give him a token.

How’s that for too much detail into our boring NYE??

Meanwhile, I was avoiding my phone all night because the Stranger Things finale was released but Chooch and I had tickets to see it in the theater on New Year’s Day at noon. I wouldn’t even open Instagram to post a Happy New Year picture.

But finally it was Thursday and I was so sick to my stomach over the anticipation of saying goodbye to Stranger Things! I get so easily attached to everything and anything, it’s fucking stupid. I hadn’t originally intended on seeing it in the theater. Kevin and Corey were telling us it was going to be released this way back in November and at the time, they had thought it meant it was the ONLY way to watch it so I was really annoyed by that because I don’t generally enjoy going to the theater to see movies, let alone a series finale?? (Says the broad who is about to go to the movies again tonight to see Marty Supreme, but I digress! This is only because Chooch also wants to see it and I’m trying to actively be more supportive of the Hollywood Theater down the street.)

Of course, it turns out that it was also going to be released on Netflix so yay, but then Chooch started hounding me to reserve tickets to see it in the theater since he’d still be in town for it. I grudgingly did so. There were only two theaters showing it, and the closest one is in a part of town I try to avoid with all my might (the Waterfront, I have always hated the feel of this area) so I asked Chooch if he cared if we’d have to drive 45 minutes out of the city to see it in Greensburg, LOL. He said he didn’t care! He just wanted to see it and besides, the theater in Greensburg had more availability.

Can I just pause here and say that the fact that he chose to do this with me and not one of his friends actually made my heart feel like it was going to pop out of my chest? We have watched this show together since it came out in 2016 and this just felt so special, driving to Greensburg (me yelling, “SLOW DOWN!” to him every 10 seconds as if he doesn’t get his speed demon tendencies from me) and making him listen to my annoying music, ugh. It was probably the BEST New Year’s Day I’ve ever had, if we’re being honest.

There was some AMC promotion where every ticket came with a $20 food credit — the same cost as the ticket, so suddenly I wasn’t AS annoyed that it cost us $40 for these tickets!? I am so out of the loop with theater prices that I had to consult with my friend Nate at work who confirmed that $20 is the going rate for “special releases” I guess. Because of this, I figured we could just get there a little bit earlier and get food for lunch they allege to have Impossible nuggets, flatbread pizza, etc. But the young kid at the counter said, “no, we’re out” to both of these items and then before we had a chance to choose anything else, he added, “We’re out of basically everything.”

Dafuq.

Here’s $40 in concession credits, good luck.

There was a mall across the parking lot from the theater and we had a good 45 minutes, so I suggested just going there. I was fine because I had eaten breakfast, but Chooch hadn’t eaten anything yet and I didn’t want him to have popcorn for lunch (assuming they weren’t out of that too). So we went to the food court and luckily there was a Panera there so Chooch got his beloved caprese sandwich. Neither of us had ever been to the Westmoreland Mall before so that was a fun side quest.

Back at the theater, the concession stand now had a legit line as opposed to earlier when it was just Chooch and me, looking like we had only gone to AMC to eat lunch. I felt bad for all the people in line around us discussing what they were going to get when I knew it was basically candy, popcorn, or suck their fat one. (IYKYK.)

However, when it was our turn, I decided to press my luck and tentatively ask for a soft pretzel.

There was an awkward silence.

“Well…” the guy started. “We’re out of the pretzel bites, but we do have one Bavarian pretzel left…” He was saying this is a tone like he was trying to talk me out of ordering it, but that’s the pretzel I was actually asking about.

I was like, great my guy, OK cool, I’ll take the last Bavarian.

But he goes, in a weirdly serious tone, “It’s a pound and a half.”

LOOK I HAVE $40 DOLLARS IN FOOD CREDIT HERE AND WOULD LIKE MY FUCKING PRETZEL STOP FAT-SHAMING IT AND ME! Bro was about to pull out the bullhorn next to announce to everyone that this Fatty from the City had just purchased the last 1.5 pound soft pretzel.

Anyway, I got to use the stupid food vouchers – one Bavarian pretzel, one bottle of water, and one soft drink was $30. Jesus.

However, once that pretzel was birthed from the over and delivered to us, I opened the lid and yelped. That was one motherwhompin’ pretzel for sure and actually worth the $16. Plus it came with two things of cheese. It was so big (literally looked like a vine from the Mind Flayer) that Chooch and I only ate about 1/8 of it before Stranger Things started and took the rest home for Henry the Pretzel Monster.

I should have held it up to my head for scale – it was definitely bigger than my head.

Well, anyway – no spoilers here obviously but props to Chooch for twisting my arm because being in a sold out theater for this finale was everything. I don’t think I have ever experienced anything like that even back when I was regularly going to the movies (I used to be a huge movie buff as a teen and into my early 20s!) and I’m so glad that the Duffer Bros made this an option because the live audience made it feel so much more epic! I still plan to rewatch it at home on Netflix (Henry and I have been re-watching the whole series and are almost done with Season 4, anyway) but this was truly the coolest way to watch it. THANK YOU, CHOOCH.

He was 10 when it first came out, and being able to watch something with him that touched so heavily upon my own childhood as an 80s kid was wild and memorable!

(OMG don’t mind me but I’m just over here crying again, lol.)

The rest of the day was super chill. Just hung out at home, finally got to start scrolling through all the Stranger Things reaction and theories posts on Threads and Reddit, and just had a nice relaxing New Years evening.

That was a really nice start to 2026, although it also means it’s almost time to take Chooch back to Philly and I am really getting sadder and sadder thinking about this because having him home for this Christmas break made everything feel normal again and now I’m going to go back to being lonely during the days while I’m sitting here working.

Sigh.

Happy New Year!

It’s been a minute since I went to a concert alone (not counting the kpop concerts we go to where we sit floors apart) but when I saw that PVRIS was bringing their 10th anniversary White Noise tour to Pittsburgh I didn’t even bother asking Henry if he wanted to go because I knew he’d say no. So I signed up for the presale and bought one ticket just for me – cheap and easy!

The White Noise album technically came out 11 years ago and it was on constant rotation in our house for a long time back then! From the moment I saw the video for St Patrick, I was subbed.

I’ve seen them a whole bunch of times since then – mostly at Warped Tour and as the opener for other bands – but coincidentally every time I have seen them headline, I’ve been alone (this was the third time!).

Henry dropped me off at the Roxian 30 minutes before doors and I was kind of shocked at how short the line was. Granted, it was a cold night but that usually doesn’t stop die hards. The Roxian opened sometime after I had become totally immersed in Kpop so I actually had never been here before this night since I wasn’t going to non-Kpop concerts for a big chunk of there.

While I was standing there, I saw a man get out of a parked car down the street and start walking over to the line. I squinted and was like, “OMG HENRY CAME BACK! HE BOUGHT A TICKET AND CAME BACK FOR ME!” because the man was of Henry’s age, same glasses, same beard…but the closer he came the more groomed he was and also his beard was more solid white and manscaped well. So, not Henry. But that man was definitely attending the concert though because at one point during the night I turned around and saw him standing up in the balcony.

Anyway! Doors opened right at 7PM. As my purse was getting casually inspected (have fun sifting through my collection of YOU NEVER KNOW tampons, Male Security, one of the lady staff standing nearby said she liked my purse.

“And your shoes, too!” she added and I did my signature cringey Shirley Temple hand-under-chin smile thing that I do which totally sends Chooch. Good thing he wasn’t there but I was sure to text him about it.

(My purse and shoes were both Vans! 99.9% of my shoe collection is Vans. I stay consistent. The only non-Vans I have ever coveted are the G-Dragon Para-noise Nikes which have been unattainable for me over these last 6 years.)

Once I got inside, I made a beeline for the barricade. It’s my go-to when I’m at shows alone. Usually far-right barricade. It seemed like the people at the barricade to my left were also there alone, and we all just kind of leaned against it, mindlessly scrolling through our phones, until the opener – Dua Saleh – came on. That was fine with me because small talk is exhausting to me, especially after a full day of work that also included therapy. I was happy to stand there alone in silence until the show started.

I went in blind to Dua Saleh and was blown away. First of all, they came out on crutches, foot in a boot, and still managed to work the stage.

I was blown away – I think all of us there who didn’t have prior exposure to them left that night as a fan. Their singing was soulful and mystical, honestly hypnotic to the point where I began to forget where I was.

Afterward, we were entertained by watching the stage crew go through the tedious process of attaching furniture to the stage lighting trusses (I made Henry look up the technical name for me because I was just calling the “stage light things” lol). Meanwhile, not one but two Fergie songs played which had me dying because we were talking about the meme of her singing horribly on GMA (I think?) and doing back flips across the stage. I honestly can’t remember the last time I actually heard a Fergie song out in the wild, but they had an early 00s playlist pumping so it made sense but still!

The final result!

Oh, before I get into the rest, I want to give a shout out to the security at the front of the stage – there were three of them and they were so chill. I had fun watching them fuck around with each other in between sets and taking selfies to send to their security friends in the balcony. My first impression of the Roxian was really solid!

And finally….PVRIS. I knew I was going to cry but I didn’t expect to cry AS SOON as they came out on stage. (OK that’s a lie, lol.) But damn, it’s been too long since I last saw them live and that’s totally on me. (I think the last time was actually when I saw them in Royal Oak, Michigan?? That may have been in 2018.)

They tore through the entire White Noise album – no breaks, no banter in between songs. That did feel kind of sterile but also added a layer of mystery and seriousness, if you know what I mean. Like, this is such a special album and a special night honoring it, so it made sense that all the banter was saved up until the special set proceeding White Noise because it kept us all in the zone.

But Lynn is such a light-hearted banterer so it was definitely refreshing to hear her speaking voice after White Noise was finished. It brought us back down to earth, in a way, anchored us after that wildly emotional ride!

View this post on Instagram

You and I is one of my favorites and I screamed my throat raw during this one (not my video!!):

I don’t really know what else to say other than it was a great crowd, a great show, and an overall great night even though I was alone! I feel like the last two times I went to one of their headlining shows, the crowd was annoying, but the crowd was so cool and considerate at this show. When the person who was originally next to me gave up their spot to the young girl behind us who was SUPER STOKED TO BE THERE, she turned to me at one point and asked, “You can still see, right??” Her flailing arm was blocking my view a lot of the time but I just smiled and told her she was fine because go off, queen! She was living her best night and I’m not going to stand there and be a tight-lipped Karen because she has her arm in the air. (If it would have been her phone, that’s a different story!) But she was so cute and I was jumping and flailing about too so who cares. Just a really great crowd.

My voice was cooked after that though because I just screamed my face off most of the night (most of my video clips are just my big mouth lol). I felt so GOOD after that and was blabbering my head off to Henry on the way home.

PVRIS 4EVER.

SETLIST

1. SMOKE
2. ST PATRICK
3. MY HOUSE
4. HOLY
5. WHITE NOISE
6. FIRE
7. EYELIDS*
8. MIRRORS
9. GHOSTS
10. LET THEM IN
11. YOU & I
12. BURN THE WITCH
13. SNAKES
14. GOOD ENEMY
15. ANIMAL
16. DEAD WEIGHT
17. LOVE IS A….
18. I DON’T WANNA DO THIS ANYMORE**
19. HALLUCINATIONS
20. GODDESS

*Ugh, Christina and I liked this song together
**What I say approx. 87x an hour during my typical work day

UGH, I love PVRIS so much.

I am obligated to end this with a picture of Chooch and Lynn Gunn from Warped Tour 2015! The line was actually cut off for their meet and greet and were like “:(” but then Lynn saw Chooch in his Emarosa tank and she called out to us, “I designed that shirt!” (she’s also an artist!) and then waved us over to their merch table and took a picture with Chooch. She was so gracious and sweet and it’s something that stands out in my mind every time I think of PVRIS. <3

I haven’t shot off any music videos into the ether in a while so here are some jams that I have been obsessing over lately! (See also: need a break from typing words lol.)

1. PRESTON KNIGHT – A NIGHT TO REMEMBER

Originally, I was going to post the first one of his songs that I heard but then this one slipped into my heart. I appreciate that his music videos have a Lost Boys / horror-theme to them! How to steal my heart:

• 80s synth
• horror-themed music videos
• smooth vocals

2. NCT DREAM – BEAT IT UP

NEW NCT DREAM ALERT!! WAKE UP!! NEW NCT DREAM DROPPED!!

God, I still love them so much.

3. SUMMER SCHOOL & RYAN PREWETT – SENTIMENTS

Sadly, there is no music video for this but I would remiss not to share it (I was spamming my work friends with this last week on Teams because it’s just too good and even GLENN LIKED IT). It’s like next gen Rick Astley and I can’t get over how good it is. If I had gone the traditional wedding route, I would be so mad right now that this wasn’t around yet to play at the reception.

4. CHANDLER LEIGHTON – SAY LESS

I’ve been in my Chan era since seeing her open for Johnnie Guilbert.

5. DAVID DEEJAY feat. DONY – SEXY THING

OK this one is old but I recently found out that the Romanian music I became obsessed with on our trip is a genre called POPCORN which makes it even more amazing. Anyway, this song comes up a lot in Popcorn playlists and instantly gets stuck in my head like a popcorn kernel in the teeth. IS THAT WHY THEY CALL THIS POPCORN??

Well, there you go. Five songs. Maybe one will stick.

(SRSLY THOUGH SUMMER SCHOOL BETTER GO ON TOUR BECAUSE I WILL TRAVEL FOR THAT SHIT. Heads up, Henry.)

Remember last spring when I accidentally became a Johnnie Guilbert fan? Well, Henry and I got to see him last week at Skully’s Music Diner in Columbus! (OMG before you even assume that Henry didn’t want to do, I have someone’s video from that night playing on YouTube for blogging inspo and Henry was whispering the words!!)

First time at Skully’s! A love a new-to-me venue but I also get curiously anxious beforehand too. Fear of the unknown, etc. This one ended up being tiny with just the amount of grime. You know I love kpop with my whole heart but I really miss these small shows in dark, sweaty venues too! I’m glad that I have been squeezing these in again.

Chooch didn’t know why we were in Columbus until I sent him this picture and his response was, “Ugh. Great.”

There were two college-aged girls in line behind us talking about how embarrassed they’d be if their parents came with them to see Johnnie and I was like, “Do they think we’re here with our children? OMG DO THEY THINK I’M HENRY’S DAUGHTER???”

LOL.

I appreciated that I got carded and the girl at the door who was way younger than me called me “dear” when she called me over to get a wristband. This night was already off to a great start.

Creepy red-light special bathroom and giant ornately-framed mirror. Obsessed. Not obsessed with the fact that the bathroom stall had a curtain instead of a door though.

We were standing in a dark corner so this selfie looks like I took it on my old red Blackberry in 2007.

I don’t know what it was about Skully’s but I felt super cozy there and confidently abandoned Henry to go upstairs and buy my JOHNNIE VIOLENT DREAMS TOUR SHIRT. It’s a weird-feeling material but I will still wear it when Chooch is home for Thanksgiving because I love to trigger him and remind him that Mommy has young interests.

They still had their Halloween decorations up and that really set the mood. And they were playing some awesome emo tracks too, some of which inspired high-energy sing-alongs from the crowd (Metro Station, lol). I was stoked that they played an old Jimmy Eat World song but no one else seemed to know it so I felt old.

I took this to send to Chooch as proof that Johnnie has fans.

Chander Leighton was added as the opening act a few weeks before the tour started and I didn’t know anything about her because friends, that ain’t my scene anymore. I skimmed her Insta and thought I had an idea of the vibe she was going to bring and expected to be ambivalent toward it. What I didn’t expect was IMPRINTING ON CHANDLER LEIGHTON THAT NIGHT. Holy shit you guys, she was phenomenal, the rizz was oozing. I was completely captivated. Here’s some clips!

Meanwhile, the cutest couple ever was standing near us, dancing together through her whole set (and, later, Johnnie’s). They were kind of neo-bohemian, he sounded like Spicolli, and for some reason instead of annoying me, I thought they were so charming and adorable together and I hope they last forever. They were just existing in their little space, not bothering anyone, we love to see it. Meanwhile, Henry stood like a block of Disgruntled Elder behind me even though he CLAIMS to be having a “good” time.

AND THEN IT WAS JOHNNIE TIME! I just love him so much and in some weird parasocial way, I’m proud of him. He’s very open about his struggles with depression and residual trauma of losing his dad at a young age, not to mention being groomed by an older YouTuber when he was just a teenager. It’s crazy that this stuff was happening when Chooch met the aforementioned YouTuber at Warped Tour. Chooch was right to think this guy was a loser even at such a young age!

For the most part, the crows was pretty OK people but there were some young girls gravitated to our area toward the end that lacked concert etiquette and I was not happy with them. But mostly, I enjoyed watching all of the girls lose their minds every time Johnnie came to their side of the stage. Adorable. (OK, and relatable haha.)

But now Johnnie is in his late 20s and his music is gaining more and more traction – I’m sorry but I feel proud of him! And I genuinely 100% like his music too.

Henry’s favorite parts of the show:

• VAMPIRE
• ZOMBIE
• “I liked that first person. I can never remember her name. Yeah, Chandler. Leighton.”
• Right Girl Wrong Time

Someone asked him to do Timmy and he said no and I think that was Henry’s least favorite moment of the night because he loves Johnnie’s Timmy persona.

Please enjoy this series of snippets from the night!

He stayed on stage afterward and signed things for everyone and seemed like he was sincerely wanted to meet every single person in that room. We stan a prince who appreciates his fans.

I wanted him to sign the shirt that I was wearing but also felt weird because I’m nearly 20 years older than him so in the end, I accepted my fate (age) and we head out to start the 3 hour drive home. T O T A L L Y worth the drive, right HENRY??

(I guess I could have taken off my shoe to get signed like that person up there?!?!)

Here’s Henry’s version of Vampire, he missed almost all of the song because he thought he was recording AND HE WASN’T BUT THAT’S OK HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAUGHHHHHH.

“Vampire” is my favorite Johnnie song. Back when I started watching Jake Webber’s videos and had the realization that, wait, is that Johnnie Guilbert from the Warped Tour YouTuber days??? and then saw that he makes music now, I had the kneejerk presumption that it was going to be super lame. “Ha! Let’s see about this,” I thought as I went to YouTube and played the first video that came up, which happened to be Vampire. And then almost instantly, I said, “Oh. Fuck. Goddammit.” I hate it when I’m wrong! But I’m also glad that I was because exploring his music and watching his YouTube has been so much fun since then!

Anyway, I’m grateful that Henry and I are still doing things like driving to Columbus for a concert and driving home the same night. IT KEEPS US YOUNG RIGHT HENRY.