You guys, I think I was so excited about having Chooch home from college that I focused too hard on having the “perfect” Thanksgiving and then I ended up being sick-adjacent most of the day (I felt mildly feverish and like I was on the verge of a stomach thing but it never developed into anything). Really, it was supposed to be a laid back Thanksgiving – we got a vegan meal kit from Viridis so that Henry wouldn’t be in the kitchen all day, but then he was STILL in the kitchen all day because he picked that day to make kimchi for Chingumas.

I barely had it in me to even set the table let alone take pictures of it.

The food was underwhelming. I mean, it wasn’t BAD by any means but I guess it was just kind of boring (that mac n cheese was fire though) and the annoying part is that for as expensive as it was, there was no dessert!? Bro, you couldn’t have added a slice of vegan sweet potato pie up in that piece?

We knew this at least so we prepared by buying a boxed mix of bibingka which is a Filipino coconut cake that I made the year we had an international Thanksgiving. About 25 minutes before it was time for dinner, Henry dropped the bibingka cake-down onto the floor as he was pulling it out of the oven, and he burnt his hand on it but instead of me asking if he was OK, I was just like, “Cool now we have no dessert.”

Don’t worry – the box had two packages of mix inside so Henry made the second one. It came out dry and with burnt edges and he was like DON’T START when I opened my mouth to criticize him.

Also, looking at that picture I realized that I didn’t eat a single bite of that salad. Oh well. Ugh.

And since he had burnt his hand, he was in a BAD MOOD and being a total dick so then I got mad and then we were bickering and Chooch was like, “Cool – home sweet home.”

Ugh holidays. I wish we had had enough time (and money) to just go to Dollywood like we have done in the past because that is our happy place – Gatlinburg and Pigeon Forge in general – we rarely fight when there! But no, we stayed in Pittsburgh and ate in near-silence (it can never be fully silent with the way Henry eats).

We were begging Chooch to tell us stuff about college but he is SO MYSTERIOUS. All we know is that he loves Drexel, his grades are great, and he already had three good friends that want to room altogether next year. That knowledge was really all we needed to make this salvageable Thanksgiving. Ugh, this year though. This motherfucking year. Having Chooch home is so awesome but it’s also picking the scab off my Bambi wound. She would have been so happy these past couple of days, having him home.

First Thanksgiving without her. In that cat grief book that Corey sent me over the summer, one of the big takeaways for me was the fact that you kind of have to go through every season of mourning, you have to get past all of the “first <whatevers> without the loved one.” This was the first Thanksgiving. The first Xmas will be really gross and unbearable, I’m sure. This really sucks so bad. So bad. It’s almost December and I’m still crying every day. When does it stop hurting.

Obligatory family Thanksgiving photo.

After dinner, Penelope came downstairs and cuddled with me. She knows. I don’t think she really misses her sister, but she knows.

Sorry – this was so negative. It really wasn’t a bad day, just the dinner portion which I don’t really care that much about anyway, and I know that what really matters was that we were all together. The next day / night was so much better so I’m not too mad about things.

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