Hey hi whatever. I’ve been feeling down again. Super neurotic and panicked, sad, depressed, antsy, bored, low self-esteem, uncomfortable, paranoid (mostly I just feel like I’m dying).

I had therapy today and I guess I will try to stay positive by listing some things that are making me stay above water. Like this song that G-Dragon produced, where he personally selected a number of singers, actors, TV personalities, comedians, even a chef, who were relevant over the last year and then had them collab on a mashup of two Dosi Brothers songs from the 80s. And it was all for charity. GD’s reasoning was that he wanted to bring back the big collabs that used to happen when he was a kid, a la We Are the World, but it sounds like Korea was doing their own versions of that back then too.

I just love this so much. For any Squid Game fans out there, Player 333 is the guy in the beret in the beginning. <3

I started painting my nails again recently after being too despondent to care for several mths. Little things, right?

Hoping to get in at least one good road trip with Chooch this summer. I have a few days off around my birthday and have proposed that we drive to Iowa for two parks there (Lost Island and Adventureland) and then head down to Missouri for Worlds of Fun and a redemption tour of Silver Dollar City. Henry was buying a one-way ticket to Frown Town when I excitedly called him over to show him the map I made. We’ll see how much of this actually comes to fruition haha.

(I added Bowling Green because there is also an amusement park there, too, haha.)

(If you are familiar with anything cool / weird / tourist trappy on this route, let a bitch know.)

I saw HNC outside on Sunday and he jokingly asked me if I want his cats and I return-jokingly said, “Haha sure” and then he texted me later to see if I was serious and gave me this big spiel about “having peeps” who are allergic and I was like “OMG no I am not seriously offering to take your cats, mine would have a conniption” and he was like “OK because we prob wouldn’t actually give them up anyway” (???) and then the next morning he texted me AGAIN and apologized for being wishy-washy. Henry thinks my texting adventures with HNC is amazing.

Recently, I had been watching Coachella content on Youtube for two reasons: Enhypen performed both weekends, and my favorite YouTube siblings – the Alexanders – all went to weekend 2 and I love their vlogs. But that screwed up my algorithm so then I just started getting oversaturated with Coachella content. HOWEVER, this is what brought YouTuber Jake Webber into my life!? At first I was like UGH THIS GUY IS SO ANNOYING UGH HIS FRIENDS ARE SO ANNOYING but then I was finding myself genuinely laughing and being entertained?! And then I was like HOLD UP IS HIS FRIEND JOHNNIE GUILBERT THE SAME SCENE KID FROM THE WARPED TOUR YOUTUBERS DAYS?

Um, that would be a yes. And he is still emo and almost looks exactly the same?! So now these highly obnoxious videos are playing constantly and even Henry is getting sucked in. Chooch is SCANDALIZED by this. He hates it so much. I keep texting him pictures and videos of Henry watching and laughing and Chooch is like, “No, I reject this from my life.”

Then this sent him:

Oh! Oh! Oh! Speaking of Chooch, he texted me this the other night and my ego was POPPIN’ off.

I love that Chooch has been deep-diving into my blog archives! Until he finds the weird shit. But still! Practically his entire life is on here, at least my version of events, and I imagine that’s gotta be interesting to him someday.

Well, I think I’ve hit the bottom of my positive reserves and also, I had taken a break writing this to exercise and I jacked my left knee kind of (???) bad and I think I need to go and ask Dr. Google if I need surgery now so that’s kind of all that’s on my mind right now hahaha ugh.

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