Jul 132009
- Good goddamn, I haven’t had a single second to sit down and just fucking chill all day long. Give mama a fucking cigar.
- Why golly, son, we have different last names because YOUR FATHER WONT MARRY ME.
- Hay look @ the dumb! Coming Soonish: Wearable Art: Oh hey it’s art you can wear, and .. http://bit.ly/cbQ4m
- In my head, these things are hilarious. I don’t think Henry & Alisha agree.
- Nearly peed myself as I popped out the front door to say “m-m-miscegenation” to a porch-sitting Henry as an example walked by our house.
- Then I couldn’t stop picturing him running Baywatch-style across the sand en route to catch squid for dinner. My little Henryhoff.
- Thought I heard Henry say he’s making squid for dinner & he goes “yeah, I just ran down to the ocean.” I laughed for an entire minute.
- Listened to the dulcet tones of my phone repeating “gonorrhea” for 15 minutes. I’m in tears from lol’ing, Alisha is rubbing her temples.
- I have a long list of interests & hobbies, such as miscegenetic flagellation. Hopefully match.com can use that to find me a mate.
- My fried green tomatoes have some pink to them, like they’re a product of a miscegenetic relationship.
- Me? Weird quirks? Alisha thinks she knows me so well. I have no such quirks.
- Alisha’s rant du jour: why adding bacon or sausage increases a meal by $2.20. It’s like hanging out with a senior citizen.
- I will never understand Vampire Wars. But at least I have a cool name.
- So glad Silent Library taught my kid how to snap my bra.
- Didn’t realize how short I cut my bangs until the humidity made them go all Bettie Page on me. I guess that explains the current urge for whip-play …
- My favorite part of summer is the dirty looks I get as I sit @ red lights with screamo on high. Oh also – my neighbor Robin’s tubetops.
- I think Alisha and I need to start an amateur boxing league, and all the bouts will be me against her.
- Just sat through a ten minute vitriolic rant about Shoes Under from Alisha. Am a little frightened. It ended with “…& it boils my blood.”
- @cantcme99 haha, u dummy-turkey
- http://twitpic.com/a28k9 – “A book to record the colorful things your kids say” bahahahaha.
- http://twitpic.com/a25vy – Where my obsession with Phil Pfister was born.
- I bet Phil Pfister is down with #miscegenation.
- Phil Pfister, you should be ashamed of yourself. Just go home already.
- Apparently I’ve been saying “light & refreshing” all day.
- Sometimes, when I really want to push Henry out of his comfort zone, I send him to Starbucks.
- @saucalisha oh thx a lot, I directed that
- Watching Chooch eat a bowl of shredded cheese, I said “What a weirdo.” He said back to me “Look at yourself.” WTF!?
- What? Hackneyed bangs are in again.
- Today I will be attempting to work with resin. If you have a storm cellar, get ye ass down in there.
- Hay look @ the dumb! humor me, humor you: My friend Ally posted this on Facebook. I did it t.. http://bit.ly/6VAGT
- Always feel slightly hungover, w/ a desire to punch a mime, after a night of extreme giddiness. Glad my friends have a high Erin tolerance.
- Hay look @ the dumb! a post of random happenings: Tonight is Henry’s last night at his.. http://bit.ly/13ysen
- Alisha won’t comment on my Facebook status because she’s “having a conversation [about miscegenation] with someone else.”
- Someday, Chooch is going to hear “miscegenation” as an adult & wonder why he feels so scared.
- Set it as my ring tone, made Alisha call me & proceeded to traumatize my son by laughing so hard.
- I want this to be my ringtone.
- Have my phone pronouncing “miscegenation” in a loop. I’m the only one who thinks its funny. Chooch said he doesn’t want to hear it anymore.
- Oh, so my mom’s home from the hospital, but no one felt obliged to tell me. Fantastic, guys!
- Just got my ass kicked by a squirt gun-wielding douchebag known as Henry.
- Alisha thinks it’s creepy when grown ppl whisper. Then she sang us the ABCs.
- Yeah, I don’t know why I’ve been worried about a school district for this kid. He’s so not going anywhere.