Apr 072023

Hello it’s 8:12am and we’re leaving our dumb hotel in Toledo-ish to start the second leg of our Chicago journey. I’m glad I didn’t live blog last night because it was extremely uneventful unless you consider me having my dinner hopes and dreams dashed twice in a row before finally settling on Sheetz which is what I should have just done when we were still near home but I said NO, MAYBE WE CAN STOP SOMEWHERE BETTER ON THE WAY but then Oath pizza had a confusing menu and a worker who was too busy fucking around with ingredients to pay attention to us and then another rest stop has a Freshens which excited me because I wanted something healthy and was eyeing up the rice bowls but, as if reading my mind, a surly worker emerged from the back and mumbled, “Just so you know, we’re out of rice bowls” extremely eventful.


(Not you!! The food places.)

We’re at Flying Joe. I got a BLUE BIRD latte (white choc/lav) even though I came in here just wanting a regular coffee. Sigh. Henry got a lemoncello cold brew which sounds disgusting.

We’ll see. I liked the woman who waited on us.

I also got a kombucha because my stomach is begging for it.

ok Henry’s has a lemon cold foam on it which is delicious. I didn’t taste it with the coffee itself though. I dunno, it was a fine experience except that one of my fave NCT Dream songs came on RIGHT when we got there and I was sad to get out of the car.

9:56am: just stopped at PETRO in Somewhere, Indiana because I had to pee so bad but first I had to walk past a rack of NOT GUILTY Trump shirts (mmm) and a hunting knife kiosk. Ugh. I hated it there except that Demi Lovato’s “Heart Attack” was playing (love that song) and the bathroom soap smelled nice.


Then Henry drove right down the road to Pilot to get gas and I screamed WHY DIDNT WE JUST COME HERE TO BEGIN WITH and he said “I dunno” with a mouthful of pretzels. Ugh.


12:59am: Dude.

12:34: oh fuck I am fully stuffed you guys. What a great experience!!

Fish sandwich!! I have been craving a good vegan fish sandwich ever since the not-great one we recently got in Pgh. I really do not understand the Pgh vegan scene at all. Every other city we go to has it locked down, but Pghs over there having vegan restaurants that only open when they want and, as Henry pointed out, caters to only one demographic: white hipster assholes. With the exception of Sugar Spell (and Zenith, which is not fully vegan) I have always felt like an interloper at these establishments.

Henry got a po boy but my photo sucks:

Also, their chocolate chip cookies were bus.

12:38pm: Henry just performed a series of weird nose noises and I asked him to please calm down. “CALM DOWN WHAT??? WHAT AM I DOING??” Clueless.

1:24pm: we’re back in the car after doing a WALK ABOUT at some small park near where we ate lunch. I can’t eat and then sit in the car – I need to digest, Fran.

Henry loves when he’s about to take my picture and I say “wait! Should I pose?” and then activate my signature floppy limb stance. (Also, 6.5 hours until NCT Dream!)

There were a lot of different birds at this park because it was surrounding a lake, and it made me miss Chooch because he loves ducks, geese, and seagulls, and this spot had them in abundance.

Chooch, in case you’re wondering, is home with the cats, not even remotely caring that we’re gone.

3:56pm: in case you’re wondering, we checked into our room at the Wyndham for about 90 minutes now. We drove past the Allstate Arena on the way here and NCT Dream was already there and I was SWEATING.

Our hotel is decent. Henry napped off and on the whole time and I did a Grow With Jo workout and watched Friends. Then I got dressed for tonight (a preliminary run) and made Henry take pictures of me which is his favorite thing to do. But now we’re on our way to this vegan Korean restaurant for a light dinner before the show!!

5:01pm: We swung by Amitabul for some vegan Korean fare and lemme tell you something: if I lived in this area, I would be a regular. So peaceful and the food felt fully nourishing!

Spicy kimchi maki roll!

(Wait hold on we’re in the car going back to the hotel now and Henry said I BET THESE TINY HOUSES COST $300,000 AND THEY DONT EVEN HAVE DRIVEWAYS and I said “they’re cute but this area seems congested” and then immediately second-guessed myself because sometimes when I try to say adult things, I’m exposed, but Henry said “that it does” – I constructed an adult statement and it was correct, you guys!)

Back to dinner:

I got the Buddha Bop and it was delectable. I ordered the spiciest version and it was a gochujang explosion of ecstasy in my mouth-space. Ugh I love the taste of gochujang and sesame oil.


Chooch would have been THRU THE ROOF if he was here to hear Henry’s wet mastication of his meal with the soundtrack of a monk chanting “Om” on repeat playing from a speaker. It was actually making me twitch a bit.

We both only ate half because we were still full from lunch but now we’ll have food for after the concert at least!

6:01pm: we just came back to the hotel after getting some of the best lattes I’ve had at:

It’s inside a train station. I got an ube latte (hot) and Henry got an iced pistachio donut latte. We are both in agreement (I tried so hard to make agreeance a word) that they are quality.


“It’s because they’re handcuffed,” I said, AN INSIDE JOKE because I saw a sign that said their coffee drinks are hand-crafted and my shit eyes read it as “handcuffed.” Because that makes sense.

Some girl was in the station with her NCT lightstick!!!!

ITS ALMOST TIME so I have to change back into my concert clothes and say BYE.


Say it don't spray it.

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