Books. Let’s get it:

1. What Have We Done – Alex Finlay

Honestly? I didn’t like the other Alex Finlay book I read and this one was pretty much on the same level. In fact, I can’t even remember reading this now.

Oh wait, I do remember. There were some sincerely annoying characters in this bitch.

2. Funny You Should Ask – Elissa Sussman

Duuuuude. I had taken this out of the library several months ago, DNF’d it without even starting it, but then trying it out later when I saw the audiobook chillin’ on Libby. (Scribd, maybe? Can’t remember.) The premise is that a young writer interviews a famous young actor in a way that leaves the reader wondering DID THEY OR DIDN’T THEY DO IT.

Fast forward a decade or so and she’s asked to write a follow-up. I won’t get into too much but holy shit, I loved this book. It was funny, bittersweet, refreshing, and hopeful. Um, why are my eyes wet right now?!

(Also, can we talk about this cover? I am so hot for the red/pink color palette. If we ever buy a house, I 100% want a Valentine-themed room.)

3. Fantasticland – Mike Bockoven

OK. I liked this premise and REALLY liked how it was told via interviews for a documentary. I listened to this on audio and that made it even better. Basically, there is a huge ass hurricane that hits Florida and a bunch of employees at a popular theme park agree to stay behind for extra pay because the park was built to withstand catastrophes of a certain degree and because of that, rescue teams / the government make this is a low priority area to service. Shit goes awry and since the majority of the people stuck here are teenagers/young adults, it gets very extreme and violent super quick.

There were definitely a lot of body horror parts that made me blanche a bit, but I thought that the story itself was pretty decent. It did get pretty redundant at times though because various people were essentially telling the same story from different angles/perspectives.

I actually finished it in the car on the first leg of our drive to Chicago for NCT Dream so I will probably always remember it for that.

4. The Paris Apartment – Lucy Foley 

I think this is the third Lucy Foley book I’ve read and each one has been mid. What am I missing here? Lucy Foley is so popular on Bookstagram but I just haven’t been that impressed yet.

This was your typical “everyone in the apartment building is connected/fishy/sinister” whodunnit. Not the worst I’ve ever read but I also sincerely did not really care about anyone in this book or what the big reveal was going to be. The cover is nice though.

5. What Lies in the Woods – Kate Alice Marshall

I knew this author’s name sounded familiar and it’s because I read a YA novel of hers several years ago, which I thought was just OK. This adult thriller/mystery was much better. I cared about the main character and honestly, the plot can fall apart in a book but if I love the characters, I will still probably end up loving the book. That being said, this was KIND OF far-fetched but the writing was strong and the people felt real to me. Sometimes that’s enough.

6. Everyone in My Family Has Killed Someone – Benjamin Stevenson 

OK, this was pretty effing great. Sometimes I need a light-hearted, slap-sticky take on a mystery novel and this one did it for me. Charming cast of characters, loved the writing style, quirky and smart. Apparently, this is the start of a series and I think I will have to see it through!

7. Wrong Place, Wrong Time – Gillian McAlister

Typically, I don’t fuck with sci-fi / time travel type shit but this one was pretty compelling to me! The book starts in present day and goes back in time from there, with a WHY that needs to be answered. I was invested, buckled in for the ride. Did I understand all of the time shit? FUCK NO. But it didn’t frustrate me, because the characters and story itself were strong enough to carry me through. There was a solid A-HA moment for me too, which was satisfying.

I think one of the reasons I was felt connected to the main character was because her son reminded me of Chooch a little bit and I was desperate for his actions to make sense.

8. The Lost Night – Andrea Bartz

INTO IT. I really really really liked the flashbacks into the lives of a hipster friend group living in NYC in the early 2000s. The core member of the group kills herself and the rest of the book is about how, years later and after they all had drifted apart, the protagonist of the book starts to realized that she can’t actually remember key elements of the night their friend killed herself.

I loved the music references – it made me so nostalgic – but also this was just so wonderfully written, the story was compelling, there was some humor sprinkled in too so you didn’t get weighed down by the heaviness of the themes. I flew through it and then immediately recommended it to Henry who listened to the audio book in like, one day. He loved it too.

Highly recommend but if you hate it DON’T @ ME.

9. Remarkably Bright Creatures – Shelly Van Pelt

I read one chapter and the voice in my head screamed, “DNF THIS BITCH. THIS IS NOT GOING TO END WELL.” Because one of the characters is an octopus in an aquarium and the first chapter is him telling the readers what the lifespan of his type of octopus is, and how many days he’s been captive in the aquarium. So, you know where this storyline is headed.

But I forged on and I’m…..glad that I did because this was a very sweet story of found family but hoo boy, I finished it right before I logged on to work one day and couldn’t stop doing the “I HAVE BEEN CRYING” full-body shudder / breath hitching.

This was a nominee for the 2022 Goodreads Best Literary Fiction category and I get why.

Ow, my heart hurts just looking at the cover. Fuck.

10. All These Bodies – Kendare Blake 

Highschool boy in the 1950s tries to solve the mystery of a midwest murder spree. It was ok. I didn’t realize it was YA when I picked it up and it definitely read as such.

11. People Like Her – Ellery Lloyd

A thriller, at times tongue-in-cheek, about a UK Instagram influencer mom who finds herself on someone’s shit list, BIGLY. It was a fast read and I thought it was pretty OK and entertaining!

12. My Darkest Prayer – S.A. Cosby

Wow, what a disappointment, considering that Razorblade Tears was one of the best books I read a few years ago, a big 5 stars. This was like someone else had written it – or is this the same way Razorblade Tears was written!? I truly can’t remember but hoo boy, this was overloaded with extremely trite and eye-rolly similes. SO MANY WORDS for no reason. Cringey dialogue. Vulgar. Crude. Made me feel like I was reading a book for bros without permission.

The worst part though is that the plot wasn’t solid enough to make up for any of that shit. I TRUTHFULLY DID NOT CARE. There were chunks and chunks of chapters that I totally skipped over – not even skimmed, SKIPPED – because it was like, ‘Oh, OK. Another annoyingly descriptive fight scene.”

I think, no – I know, that I was just definitely not the target audience for this book. Your dad would probably like it. Me? DIDN’T IMPRESS ME MUCH.

Oh and also, it kind of felt like this was a second book in a series. There was one incident that was referenced numerous times throughout the entire book and it made me feel like there was another book out there that I should have read first, I don’t know. But yeah, just really not my cup of tea and also, AND THIS IS PROBABLY AWFUL TO SAY, I didn’t think that the “shocking discovery” was all that shocking? Am I just a terrible person? Maybe.

I was expecting to really like this because there was a funerary / church angle to it, but nope. Big fat nope. Did not enjoy this.

And these were the books:

1. All Hallows – Christopher Golden

UGH this was supposed to be “if you like Stranger Things” and like, the 1980s – I dunno. But I did not feel a single 80s vibe from this book, the characters were cardboard, and the writing was cheesy AF. Not scary.

2. The Villa – Rachel Hawkins

I didn’t realize immediately that I disliked another book I read last year by this same author, so I was nervous. However, this one was 4-stars for me. Two BFFs (the friendship is lowkey strained though) go to Italy for the summer to write their respective books and the villa they rent is the location of a very high-profile murder that took place in the 70s. I loved the 70s-throwback chapters so much, and I thought the characters in this one were better written than Reckless Girls (I think that’s what her other book is called – I don’t feel like looking even though in the amount of time it took me to type this, I could have checked lol ugh who cares). This is one of those times, though, where I wonder if I liked it because the audiobook was so well done, or if the book itself was just that solid? I dunno, it was different and I liked the main character. The ending was….I mean, it’s a bit outrageous but isn’t that why we read thrillers?

3. All Good People Here – Ashley Flowers

OK, does this borrow loosely (heavily) from the Jon Benet Ramsey case? Sure. But is it a motherfucking page-turner? EFF YEAH. I always bring a book with me when we road trip even though I barely end up reading in the car because I’m liveblogging or blabbing away into Henry’s shut-off ears, but this one had me so enrapt that I couldn’t put it down on the way to and from Toronto in March and then I stayed up late when we got home because I had to finish it before going to bed. This entertained me bigly.

4. You Must Remember This –  Kat Rosenfeld 

OK, I was super into this mystery / thriller. Loved the old family estate setting, the flashbacks to the grandma’s youth, the sardonic banter from the surly uncle. I was fully on board with this book, getting successfully creeped out here and there, until it all kind of unraveled for me at the end. I think I even said, “Really?” out loud. I still gave it a 4 because I really did enjoy my time reading it but the ending was hard for me to swallow.

5. Gothic – Philip Fracassi 

OK MUCH better than his other book I read, A Child Alone With Strangers. As I read this, it so vividly played out in my mind like a really classy horror movie from the 70s, something akin to The Omen. Basically, this struggling author is gifted an antique desk by his rich wife/gf but UNFORCH, the desk is fucking CURSED big time and all kinds of very violent chaos ensues, and believe me when I tell you that it was written with such intricate detail, that I could feel the pain in my bones. I listened to this on audio during my neighborhood walks and I was involuntarily flinching in public and sucking the breath between my teeth during some of these scenes.

But yeah, total 1970s classy horror movie aesthetic here.

6. A Flicker in the Dark – Stacy Willingham 

Megan lent this one to me and our tastes in thrillers are extremely aligned so I knew it was going to be good. She never lends me a dud!

This one was a page-turner and even though I sort of guessed the twist, there was enough other shit / red herrings going on that kept it fresh.

7. A Quiet Life – Ethan Joella

This was a very sweet character study of three extremely different strangers who each recently lost a loved one,  and how their lives end up intersecting. It was pretty maudlin, I’m not going to lie, there was no quirkiness, no comic relief really. But it was written beautifully and I cried.

8. I Have Some Questions For You – Rebecca Makkai 

FUCK YES. FIVE STARS. MY SECOND MAKKAI, AND BOTH WERE 5 STARS. This was excellent. Dark academia that I can get behind. If you’re an audiobook fan, I would definitely recommend going that route with this one.

One weird thing to note is that I read this right after a Flicker in the Dark, and both books had references to kids crushing fireflies.*

Anyway, don’t waste any more time reading this blog – just go and grab this book as fast as you can.

9. The Golden Spoon – Jessa Maxwell 

Eh. Very overhyped if you ask me. A light mystery. Didn’t really care one way or the other.

10. Shoko’s Smile – Choi Eun Young

Hello, this was fine but every time I pick up a book of short stories, I’m like, “Wait, I don’t like short stories.” Somehow I didn’t realize that’s what this was even though it literally says it in the title. Cook on, Erin.

11. Sign Here- Claudia Lux

Eh. I kept losing interest and couldn’t keep up. This had the potential of being so great and right up my wino-laden alley, but the delivery was kind of a mess and I cared about no one or nothing.

12. Episode Thirteen – Craig DiLouie

Another one that is best read via audiobook because it’s about a ghost hunting TV show, each character has their own chapters, and the background noise gave me goosebumps even when walking around the ‘hood in broad daylight. Also, there is a song that’s played several times that is FUCKING HAUNTING. It did kind of lose me toward the end because it became very sci-fi-y but I was overall thoroughly entertained and creeped out. No fucking way I could have listened to this alone at night.

13. London Seance Society – Sarah Penner

More like the London Snoozer Society.

***

OK, that’s all. Just wanted to give you a little break from the NCT Dream content (oh shit, there I go, mentioning NCT Dream again lol).

*(There were also two books that I was reading in tandem last month – one had a DAYS reference, and then as soon as I picked up the second book, THAT ONE ALSO HAD A DAYS REFERENCE IMMEDIATELY IN THAT CHAPTER. Also, two back to back books had a girl character named Riley. That’s all.)

I have no original titles under my belt these days. Let’s just reminisce about the books my eyeballs drank in last month. If I remember correctly, it was a so-so reading month and some of these books I probably have nothing to say about.

1. Everything I Know About Love – Dolly Alderton

I really loved this a lot. I pictured a British Jane Pratt throughout, it was like rolling around on a mattress papered with Sassy pages. A VIBE. My friend Sadi’s Goodreads review was “a beautiful love letter to female friendship” and I really can’t summarize it any better than that. It was entertaining and also taught me that there is a Windows hotkey that will change CAPSLOCK to lowercase and I was so excited about this that I wrote it down and then tried it at work the next day AND IT WORKED but now I’ve lost it. I cannot tell you how many times in the past I have been tippy-tap-typing away only to look up and realize I had CAPSLOCK on!!

 2. Just the Nicest Couple – Mary Kubica

Uh….I don’t remember reading this lol. I just read the synopsis a bunch of times and these names aren’t ringing any bells and the blurb is so vague. I gave this 4 stars though—but maybe I should knock it down to three since this clearly wasn’t very memorable.

3. Thank You For Listening –  Julia Whelan

Dude, I loved this and gave it five stars. In fact, as soon as I saw the cover again, I spontaneously smiled, bigly. This book was really cook because the author, Julia Whelan, is also one of my favorite audiobook narrators! And this gives some really cool insight into the audiobook narration and voice acting world. At its core, it’s a romance novel (and actually a really one too – I cringed not), but it also covered some serious issues too. The main character was a rising star, born to act, until a horrific accident (the details of which aren’t described until well into the book and it….it was unexpected) leaves her with a disability and essentially ends her acting career. The writing is snappy. The characters are full of life. This book was just so fun to read and yeah, I cried.

4. A Child Alone With Strangers – Philip Fracassi

I really want to find a horror author that I love. Please Lord, help me. This book was FINE. The writing was kind of cheesy (OK, very), it was about 200 pages longer than it should have been, and the characters felt like cardboard cutouts. The story itself was interesting but I wasn’t scared. It relied a lot on body horror and that’s just really not my thing. There was also a whole chapter involving stray dogs that I had to skip. I didn’t HATE it (I gave it 3 stars) but it’s not something I would recommend.

I will say that I only read this because the book of his that I wanted to read was just released last month and I was on the waitlist for it, so I chose this one to tide me over. DID I STILL END UP READING THE OTHER ONE? You’ll have to check back for the March wrap-up to find out, lol.

5. Tell Me I’m Worthless – Alison Rumfitt

NOW THIS WAS A GOOD HORROR BOOK. Shit, this actually chilled me.  I had this on audio and was listening to it in the attic while painting a mural on the closet door and then I would remember that I was in the attic and have to turn it off. It has pretty much every trigger warning imaginable. It has some GRAPHIC scenes. It made me feel uncomfortable, nauseated, disgusted. It was one of the best literary horror novels I have ever read. The most unique take on the haunted house trope. It delivered.

6. Mean Baby – Selma Blair

I like Selma Blair. I still say YOU ROONED IT!! instead of “ruined” because of her character in Kath & Kim, a short-lived sitcom the name of which I couldn’t even remember, but I will NEVER forget “ROONED.” I was obsessed with the old-ass WB show Zoe Duncan Jack and Jane. And obviously Cruel Intentions. But that’s about as far as I dug into her oeuvre. Yet something made me snag the audiobook of this (she narrates it) and now I can officially say that I LOVE Selma Blair and want only the best for her.

Yet somehow my main takeaway from this is that a HAWK ATTACKED HER DOG I HATE HAWKS SO MUCH.

7. Bad Cree – Jessica Johns 

This was terrible 1 star. The writing was so bad. The plot was a mess. The main character was boring AF. I wanted to LOVE this book. I really did. But I wish I could get my time back.

8. Someday, Maybe – Onyi Nwabineli

This, on the other hand, was a joy to read. OK also excruciatingly sad because the WHOLE ENTIRE BOOK is a woman trying to make sense, recover from, process, heal from her husband’s sudden and tragic death. This isn’t a spoiler, it’s literally in the blurb, but he killed himself on NYE and she is the one who found him. I know it sounds like this book probably needs to be soundtracked with a funeral dirge, but there are actually quite a few moments when I laughed out loud. It’s witty, poignant, bitterly sad, and just very memorable. I will definitely be on the lookout for more from this author.

(Also, reading this made me want to hug Henry. ‘Lil bit.)

9. Now Is Not the Time to Panic – Kevin Wilson

I really like Kevin Wilson. I didn’t love this as much as “Nothing to See Here” because the story itself just didn’t captivate me as much, but if you read this, DO NOT SKIP THE AUTHOR’S NOTE. I actually bumped this from a 3.5 to a 4 because of the author’s note.

I’ll just tell you that this about two teenagers in the 90s who become friends one summer and make some random poster, photocopy it a bunch of times, and then tape it around town. I know, what a plot, right? But …yeah, it gets weird, lol.

10. One Italian Summer – Rebecca Serle

I dunno, you guys. I had a hard time with this one. It didn’t really go anywhere? (Well, except to Italy lol.) I couldn’t relate to the main character and the grief she was experiencing because of my own weirdness with my family. The only think it succeeded in doing was putting me on an I WANT TO GO BACK TO ITALY kick. I dunno, it was fine. It would make a good airplane or beach read, I think, but was kind of not great for February at home.

11. No One Gets Out Alive – Adam Neville

Another horror novel over 600 pages! This one was way better than the Philip Fracassi one though. It actually scared me, and the violence was very well-written and so descriptive that I could EASILY picture what was happening even when perhaps I didn’t want to be able to! Again, I don’t think it was necessary for it to be this long! What is up with these giant tomes that horror novelists think that they have to write?

That being said, I need to read more from Adam Neville. I feel like back in 2020, I ordered one of his books from the library and panicked when I saw how large it was and ended up returning it because I didn’t want to have that pressure hanging over me – all of his books are probably chunkers!

***

OK that’s all for February!

January was such a fantastic reading month for me. I can’t even get over it. It reinstated my bibliophile status, I think. Revived my love for BOOKSBOOKSBOOKS. Basically, I quit listening to Booktube. I pulled from various Best of 2022 lists from reliable sources like Time, etc. I think where I was being led astray with Booktube is that I was watching these channels because I liked the personalities, but then I started to realize eventually that my tastes just didn’t align with most of them. Like, I love Kayla from Booksandlala but what she considers horror and I what I consider horror are very different.  I have also found that I gravitate more towards literary fiction and less towards the magical realism shit that she is obsessed with.

Anyway, who cares. Here are the books I read in January, all 14 of them! They were mostly all 4 and 5 stars, maybe one or two 3-3.5 in there.

1. Iona Iverson’s Rules for Commuting – Clare Pooley

Right off the bat – five star read. This book has humor, humanity, and the found family trope that I love so hard. Most of it takes place on a train / subway where a group of passengers become forced to interact with each other after one of them nearly chokes to death.  It mostly centers around Iona, a sort of “washed-up” socialite whose current employer at a magazine is beginning to find her to be irrelevant. Iona has a very strong, abrasive personality that makes the other passengers either despise her or admire her. I adored her. I adored all of them. I am crying right now as I remember how fucking precious this book is and how much it almost made me miss taking the T to work because now I want to actually strike up conversations with the regulars who I used to see every day and assign monikers to based on their fashion choices or whatever.

Well, anyway, this book made my heart grow a size or four. Then I’m sure I had the sound of a child screaming and it immediately shrunk again.

2. Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow – Gabrielle Zevin

Baby, believe the hype. Solid five stars and I am still thinking about it and getting choked up. I have read from  this author once before and genuinely liked it so I was excited to get into this one. However, and I don’t think this is just me because I read other raving reviews that agree, this book starts out slow. Like, not BAD, but knowing that this was on so many Best of 2022 lists, I was confused and really wondering if I was missing something. But then before I had a chance to DNF out of spite (I WON’T LIKE YOUR FAVORITE BOOK, AND YOU CAN’T MAKE ME), it hooked me. I can’t explain it, because this book is basically about two childhood friends who meet again when they’re in college (different colleges, same city) and decide to make a video game together.

The characters, their relationships, the blurred lines, their history…it was all so perfectly executed. There is a HUGE TRIGGER WARNING – I don’t want to spoil this book for anyone so you might want to look it up but there is a big traumatic thing that happens, and it wrecked me. I mean, I felt like I was being scooped raw by a melon baller, the pain was real. This will definitely end up being one of the best books I read this year, no cap or whatever Those Kids say.

P.S. Henry also read it and loved it, but he claims he didn’t cry. I mean, I SOBBED.

3. The Hero of This Book – Elizabeth McCracken

Sweet and oftentimes LOL funny, is this a memoir or fiction? Either way – it was a lovely read. 4 stars.

4. Vladimir – Julia May Jonas

This was a TRIP. The writing was so fresh, the characters beautifully-flawed. I laughed out loud numerous and could clearly hear the protagonist in my head, but my favorite part was the fact that Chooch had to pick this up from the library for me haha.

Anyway, 4.5 stars. Loved it and if this was Jonas’s debut novel, then I cannot fucking wait to read the next one.

5. Twenty Years Later – Charlie Donlea

This was recommended to me by my friend Eve – THANK YOU! What a unique thriller! Part of the plot revolves around an unsolved murder, the suspect of which is presumed dead after being in the WTC on the morning of 9/11. The other part follows a TV personality in present day, who resurrects this cold case while also trying to hide from her own unsavory past. I needed a good thriller, and this was it. 4 stars! Didn’t see the twist coming. (Either one!)

6. The Book of Goose – Yiyun Li

What an elegantly written, intriguing story of a childhood friendship between two girls living in rural postwar France. Honestly, Fabienne was a bit of a cunt and I wanted Agnes to haul back and clock her. But yeah, if you’re in the mood for something beautiful and literary, try this one – it’s another 4 star for me, fam.

7. Bad Dolls – Rachel Harrison

You know I tend to SORRY NEXT when it comes to short story collections, but I had to exception for Rachel Harrison, I just love her so. There were 4 stories in, one was a 3-star, 2 were 4-stars, and one 5-star about a bachelorette weekend. One of the 4-star stories was a SUPER RELATABLE tale about a savage diet app that actually had me wishing it was real because sometimes a bitch be desperate.

This was a fantastic, quick read and just what I needed  – something fun that I could listen to while taking my frigid winter morning walks. 4.5 stars overall (is that how averages work!?!?).

8. Perfect – L.A. Kessler

This one was also an audiobook, and I chose it in a whim through Scribd. I just needed something to listen to for when I walk and nothing was really looking too compelling to me. I haven’t heard of this author or this book before. It was fine! It was entertaining for sure but, and maybe this was because of the narrator, it kind of had a Christopher Pike feel to it, especially the scenes were people are killed. It’s like, “Oh OK, this person is dead now, moving right along.” Like I would have read this SO HARD in 9th grade and thought it was the coolest book ever.

It was actually pretty creepy, I’ll give it that much. Will I read the rest of the trilogy, probably not, doc.

9. Sophie Go’s Lonely Hearts Club – Roselle Lim

I was so close to DNF’ing this. I just could not connect with it and picking it up had become a real drag. But, just when I was telling myself, “Finish this chapter and then call it,” something changed. I can’t pinpoint it, it probably was a me-problem, something with my attitude, but I was suddenly ON BOARD and then the rest of the book was just a sheer delight (ok that’s not true, it had some sincere sad moments and the main character’s strained relationship with her mom stressed me out bigly). I also loved the tiny sprinkling of magical realism that was involved in that Sophie, a professional matchmaker, could see ribbons attached to peoples’ hearts and knew when there was a love connection by the way ribbons would react when two people were near each other.

Sophie moves into a new apartment building and immediately targets a group of elderly men, called the Old Ducks, as potential clients. Each Old Duck is adorable, even the one who is super grouchy. ESPECIALLY the one who is super grouchy – I actually pictured him as Glenn throughout the entire book. The Old Ducks and the FOOD were the real stars of this book.

4 stars, glad I gave it a chance! (I think this is another one that Eve suggested, so thank you, friend!)

10. All This Could Be Different – Sarah Thankam Mathews

Solid four stars, but dayum did it give me anxiety. There is A LOT going on here but in general, books about young adults out in the real world, trying to stay afloat and not perish financially, emotionally, and mortally, really makes me sweat. Our main character S is actually not very likeable but hoo boy did I feel for her. Her parents are back in India after her father takes the fall for a crime, leaving S behind in America as a teenager. Now she is out of college, being strung along by a boss who promises to sponsor her for citizenship, living rent-free in an apartment above the racist property manager who makes her life hell (this is where I was REALLY secondhand misery), becomes obsessed with and eventually starts a relationship with a girl she sees in a hardware store, but in the midst of all of this she is also developing beautiful precious friendships with some people who become her family. Love me a found family saga!!!

I can’t explain this book as well as it deserves, but I really fucking loved it and couldn’t wait to pick it back up every time I put it down.

11. Britt-Marie Was Here – Fredrik Backman 

My least favorite Backman book, but still better than most books I’ve read – that should tell you something. He has definitely become one of my favorite authors at this point. The way he crafts his characters! The dialogue! The SUPER DIFFICULT BUT LOVEABLE protagonists. The way he makes you want to live in a small town! From the telephone check-ins Britt-Marie forces upon a girl at the unemployment office to the begrudging companionship to finds in a rat, to the character in  wheelchair known solely as “Somebody,” to SAMI <3. This book gave me so much to think about, so much to love. 4.5 stars.

12. Signal Fires – Dani Shapiro 

Five stars, and I’m not ready to talk about this, I’m sorry. It got me good. Tears, lots. I love you, Ben Wilf.

;(

13. The Me You Love in the Dark – Skottie Young / Jorge Corona (art)

Finally, a graphic novel/comic that I actually liked! The story was decent but the art was excellent. Artist moves into a haunted house, becomes close to the ghost that haunts it. 3.75 stars.

14. Kindred – Octavia Butler

I want to read more classics this year and this was an excellent start. I don’t really think it needs much introduction, and I’m just sorry it took me so long to read it because it was brilliant. This book is obviously a classic for a reason, extremely intense, emotional and throught-provoking. I wish I had been required to read it in high school, to be honest. Solid 5 stars, everyone should read this once in their lifetime.

***

k, bye!

In no particular order, these are the BEST BOOKS I read last year. All were 4.5 – 5 star reads for me. Looking over this list, the ones that I would place in my ultimate top tier, would be:

1. Just Last Night (the character study in this was perfection; I felt like I knew these people)
2. The Winners (obviously – PLEASE READ THE BEARTOWN TRILOGY, THANKS)
3. The Summer That Melted Everything (I would pay to be able to read this for the first time again, it’s extraordinary)

I’m trying to do the “12 Books From 12 Friends” challenge this year, where you read one book recommended by a friend for each month of the year. I got some good recs on Instagram but still need 7 more.

The ones on my list so far:

1. Invisible Life of Addie Larue: recommended by my friend Kelly. I attempted to read this the year it came out but DNFd it very early on. I’m willing to give it a second chance  though because I have a lot of friends who loved it. Maybe I’ll try it on audio this time??
2. Bel Canto: recommended by Katrina and I am STOKED because it’s by Ann Patchett and I have wanted to read more by her ever since I read The Dutch House, because that was a solid 5 stars for me.
3. Twenty Years Later: my friend Eve recommended me a bunch of books a few weeks ago, and I currently have THREE of them in my possession courtesy of the great Carnegie Library, but this book by Charlie Donlea is the one I am specifically adding to the challenge calendar.
4. Devil House: I feel like I might regret this because it was a hard DNF for me when it came out but like Addie Larue, I will give it another go with the audiobook this time. It’s a book that I really want to love but it started off so.effing.dry.
5. Michelle Obama’s Becoming: my friend Heather suggested quite a few that I have not read, but since I have had this one on my TBR for quite some time, I will take this as a sign to crack it open finally!

OK so if you’re reading this and feel like controlling my TBR – tell me some of your favorite books!> They don’t have to be new! The only types of book I don’t like are sci-fi and self-help. I will try out anything else! Please and thank you!!

I read at least 10 books a month all year until we arrived at December. Then my motivation petered out bigly. I had a lot of stress that month too so I’m sure that played a big role.

Anyway, let’s get this over with.

1. Paper Girls: The Complete Story

The only good thing about it was that there was a Monster Squad poster in one of the characters’ bedrooms. Otherwise, this was a complete waste of my time. Not one memorable character. Extremely confusing plot. One star only because Goodreads doesn’t let you go lower than that, lol.

2. The Winners – Fredrik Backman

One of the best books I read all year, no contest. Backman did not disappoint with this third and final installment of the Beartown series. I was already quietly weeping before anything either happened and if you read book one, you know who is going to die in this book and even that didn’t prepare me for the absolute GUTTING that occurred when that time came. The way I ugly cried. The way I am tearing up again, over a month later, just by writing this.

This is such a dork alert, but one of the things I’m so excited about for our trip next summer is buying a copy of Beartown in Sweden, Backman’s home country. I just feel like that would be so special!

If there is only one thing you ever listen to me about, let it be Beartown. I will be singing the praises of this series for the rest of my damn life.

GO READ IT!! Bobo and Benji will be in your heart forever. Trust.

3. Fleishman Is In Trouble – Taffy Brodesser-Akner

What a shit book. I didn’t care about anyone in this. Narrated by Fleishman’s friend for some reason. Boring. How was this turned into a TV series? SAME WITH PAPER GIRLS?!

One star. Do not recommend. I hate-read every page and then hated myself for doing so. This was very deserving of a big fat DNF but nope, dumbo Erin had to go and waste her time reading until the end.

4. You’re Invited – Amanda Jayatissa

I was excited because this was set in Sri Lanka and I thought it would pander to my wanderlust but it was so fucking dumb. Not thrilling. Unlikeable characters. Stupid plot.

5. On a Quiet Street – Seraphina Nova Glass

Megan saved December by lending me this domestic thriller reminiscent of Desperate Housewives and I was into it! It was really just what I needed: entertaining, twisty, tense, exciting. A pretty solid ride. Would recommend!

6. An Anonymous Girl – Greer Hendriks & Sarah Pekkanen

I still don’t know how I feel about this one. It was a quick read, it kept my attention, but…there were things that didn’t add for me in the end and I was sort of walked away from this book confused and moderately unsatisfied. OK, I definitely didn’t love the ending. But the plot itself was interesting and suspenseful, and there were times when I actually felt a little scared and stressed out.

Some of the chapters are from the POV of a therapist and I really appreciated the way those chapters were written. This was my second book by this writing duo and I do enjoy them. But this one possibly had a bit too much going on and was also extremely far-fetched which, you know, I don’t mind that very much – don’t most of us read books to escape reality anyway?

7. Home Sweet Christmas – Susan Mallery

I didn’t realize this was #2 in a series until I had already started reading it but apparently, each book also works as a standalone. This was fine. VERY light, low drama. It follows four residents of a small town called Wishing Tree – two women, two men – who eventually pair up and begin relationships after resisting for most of the book. Of course, conflict / misunderstandings arise for both couples, but SPOILER both duos prevail in the end.

Super saccharine. A very light and easy read, even easier to forget afterward. I already forget everyone’s names haha.

****

Happily, I already started 2023 off with a five star book, so fuck off, December.

2022 has not been a good reading year for me. My New Year’s Resolution I think is to start physically going to the library and browsing the shelves again like pre-Covid times. I need to stop relying on Booktube & Goodreads as much.

Anyway, here are my November reads, which feels like it happened so long ago.

1. Just By Looking at Him – Ryan O’Connell

I really enjoyed this. The characters were bright and well-written, the dialogue was very trendy. I have been watching Uncoupled and would recommend this book to anyone who is enjoying that or any TV show similar to that. I gave it a 4. Apparently the guy who wrote it also writes for TV, and it felt like it (not in a negative way).

2. Such Sharp Teeth – Rachel Harrison

OK RACHEL HARRISON. I had been dying for this book to come out ever since reading Cackle last year. That book was witch-centric, and this one is her foray into lycanthropia. (Is that a word? The red squiggles under it says otherwise, lol.) While I didn’t love this one as much as Cackle, it still had that Harrison-feel to it. The dialogue is so irreverent and suitable for Lorelai Gilmore to spit across a table at Luke’s Diner.

I loved it and can’t wait for her next one!

3. When I Was You – Minka Kent

I gave this 3 stars but it was a snooze, honestly. I barely remember it.

4 Hidden Pictures – Jason Rekulak

Dude, this was pretty decent! Apparently, it won the Goodreads Award for best horror book of the year. I’m not sure I would go that far (though I didn’t really read very much popular horror this year) but I really devoured it. I love ghost stories that also involve kids, plus this one had a pretty crazy swerve toward the end that had me almost-screaming.

I had the physical book for this one and I’m glad I did because it includes copies of drawings made by the little boy in the book who may or may noy be possessed by a spirit.

I think the reason why I didn’t REALLY love it was because I couldn’t connect well with the main character, the young woman who becomes the live-in nanny for the aforementioned boy. I mean, I was still rooting for her, but all of the characters were just a bit too flat, in my opinion. The story was memorable, the people not so much. Still, I gave this 4 stars, and would recommend it probably just to casual horror fans or people looking for something moderately chilling.

5. White Is For Witching – Helen Oyeyemi

Helen Oyeyemi’s writing is not easy to digest. This is the second book of hers I’ve conquered now, and it really does feel like winning. This probably sounds like I’m leading up to an abysmal rating, but Oyeyemi might actually be one of my favorite authors. She is so WEIRD and scarily brilliant in the way she tells her stories. At one point in the book, I realized that there was a certain thing she was doing to convey the switching of POV between the main people in the book and THE FUCKING HOUSE. The house tell its own side of the story and it’s just…this is the most unique “haunted house” / “ghost story” I think I have ever read.  It took me over a week to read this and it’s only 200-some pages, because I have to read her pages slowly in order to understand everything and make sure I don’t miss a thing.

In other words, this is not a beach read. This is a “hunker down during a snowstorm with the phone in another room” fantastical experience.

I am so obsessed with Helen Oyeyemi’s brain.

6. The Shame – Makenna Goodman

This book was so short yet felt like it was never going to end. I don’t even know what it was about. It was so boring.

7. The Honeys – Ryan La Sala

The first young adult book in A MINUTE that I actually liked. Plus, that cover! The majority of the book takes place at a summer camp where a teenage boy is trying to figure out what was going on with his sister before her untimely death. I needed something “light” to listen to while I was repainting the cat wall and while this ended up being pretty dark, it was definitely riveting and the audio book itself was very well produced – I loved that there were “camp” sounds that could be heard in the background.

Plus, can we talk about that cover? 4 out of 5. I’ll read more from this guy for sure.

8. Palm Beach Finland – Antti Tuomainen

I have been wanting to read some books with Scandinavian / Nordic / Finnish settings and this was the first one on my list that the library had available. It’s not that I thought it was BAD per se, but like….I had no idea what was going on for most of it, and it seemed entirely too long for what it was. The characters were quirky, the setting was exactly what the name of the book implies – some tacky Florida-themed beach resort in Finland that the property owner was desperate to have take off. It’s just one folly after another, with accidental murders left and right, a Dumb & Dumber petty criminal duo who cause hijinks to ensue every time they’re together. It wasn’t BAD but there were numerous times when I was like, “OK let’s speed this shit up.” I couldn’t read very many pages at a time without losing interest.

9. The Remaking – Clay McLeod Chapman

Big shrug. It was OK. It started off strong, I thought, but then I thought it was pretty cheesy. It 100% wasn’t very scary either.

I gave it a 2, apparently. Sounds about right.

10. Flipped – Wendy Dalrymple 

I needed something short and light to wrap up November and I found this on Scribd. It was fine! Just what I wanted. Nothing deep. I gave it a 3. No strong opinion either way.

Bye!

1. Suburban Hell – Maureen Kilmer

Horror Lite. Like, the book equivalent of saying you want to watch a horror movie and then settling on Hocus Pocus. Good for people who aren’t really into horror but want something comfortably spooky to read in the fall. It was fine.

2. The Roughest Draft – Emily Wibberley / Austin Siegemund-Broka

Yeah, that’s what this book felt like, alright.

3. A Dowry of Blood – S.T.Gibson

Oh snap, I just realized this is #1 in a series! If you love anything Dracula-related, pick this up. It’s written from the POV of Dracula’s medieval peasant bride, as she’s explaining to Dracula why she…did what she did. I thought this was damn near perfect. I only wish I had been reading it under a tree in a cemetery. Yep, this was the perfect October read.

4. Her Majesty’s Royal Coven – Juno Dawson

HOLD THE PHONE. IT’S A 5-STAR READ. Phew, these come by so rarely anymore, so when I find one, I want to caress it tenderly and let it take Henry’s spot in bed. I can’t believe I almost returned this to the library before even trying it because I was overwhelmed with my TBR and didn’t “think” I would like this. OK, it’s about WITCHES. I was worried that it was going to be super dense with way too much world-building, but luckily, it’s similar to Harry Potter in that it takes place in the world as we know it, just….with witches existing.  The chapters rotate between the POV of a group of adult friends who all grew up together in witchdom or whatever, but as adults, we see that some of them have chosen different paths. There is a lot of LGTBQ+ discourse in this, gender identity, friendship, betrayal, BIG ASS PERSONALITIES THAT MADE ME FALL IN LOVE. I just loved it – it was exciting with biting dialogue and I actually understood the political shit going on. I can’t wait for the second book in the series!!

I could also see this being a really great TV series.

5. The Lost Years – Mary Higgins Clark

ONE STAR. It makes sense that I liked MHC’s books in middle school. But as an adult? No thanks. The way she writes, at least for this particular book, it’s like she assumes her readers are morons. Information is repeated OVER AND OVER. This book was lame & totally boring.

6. Daisy Darker – Alice Feeney

Oh wow, I forgot that I gave this 5 stars too! A 4-star for a thriller is usually very high for me, but there was something about this book that made me go all the way with it. The setting, the characters, the grandma, the VIBE. I kind of had a feeling about the twist but it was still a great time. It was cozy and perfect for October!

7. The Last Housewife – Ashley Winstead

Um, the fuck was that? I loved Ashley Winstead’s first two books with my whole damn heart and thought this was a shoo-in for the 5-star club. Wrong, bitch. First of all, it felt like someone else was writing this. I mean, it was borderline embarrassing to read at times. And the plot…no. It just didn’t work for me. I have this 3 stars but it was really more like a 2.5, Bob. I was not thrilled at all while reading this, and all of the characters were so painfully flat.

8. The Butterfly Garden – Dot Hutchison

…but then I read this one and it made The Last Housewife seem, you know, not so bad. Yeah, this was just so bad. I had a very hard time following the timeline, I didn’t care about the main broad/victim, the whole butterfly garden in general was like, “Wait, what? Huh?” No, this was trash. I should have listened to my favorite Booktuber Kat when I saw that she gave it a 2 and said “criminal minds s11e14 in a nutshell.” YES, THIS. GENERIC. And the parts with the cops were like, so stereotypical. This is apparently a series and I will not be reading any more, lol.

9. The Book of Cold Cases – Simone St. James

You know…I liked this. I wasn’t sure at first and thought I was going to be disappointed, but it was pretty interesting. I gave it a 4, maybe realistically it was more of a 3.5, but I was rooting for the main character pretty hard (she was a blogger lol) and the mystery kept me hooked.

10. We Spread – Iain Reid

OK. I went into this with the wrong mindset. I read “I’m Thinking of Ending Things” several years ago and love it so so so much, like, became obsessed with it and googled it and watched the movie (eh) so my expectations of We Spread was tainted. This isn’t horror. This was fucking sad. This is about aging, growing old, losing yourself. Iain Reid s a crazy-good writer, but I only gave this a 3 because this wasn’t what I wanted. This was definitely a “It’s not you, it’s me” situation going on here. I went in for the horror, thinking I was going to be scared to death, but instead all I got was….being scared of death.

***

So overall, not the best month for books. But hey: two 5-stars! That’s pretty fucking alright.

Hello. Here is my run-down of the books I read in September. Apologies in advance if it feels rushed but I was entrenched in a war with a HAWK this morning and have yet to get my body to calm down. IF IT COMES AFTER MY SQUIRRELS AGAIN I WILL PUNCH IT IN THE FUCKING HEAD I DO NOT CARE IF IT’S FEDERALLY PROTECTED. (You know this has been an ORDEAL when my apathetic son is alarmed and says, “Jesus Christ, please don’t wind up in the fucking hospital because you made a hawk attack you.”)

1. Book Lovers – Emily Henry

Cute, quick read. I liked the small-town location and the banter. Emily Henry is a pretty solid choice if you’re looking for a light romcom escape.

2. Things We Never Got Over – Lucy Score

First of all, did this need to be 568 pages? Probably not. I thought it was quirky and fun, the characters had personality. I hated that the kid’s name was WAYLAY!? And that the dog’s name was WAYLON. (Or something similar that made it super confusing.)

WAYLAY, THO??

I haaaaaaated that Knox eliminated “I” from every sentence. So he’d be like, “Need to…” or “Want to…” and maybe it was because I had the audiobook for this, but hearing the narrator actually speak this out loud was so grating. Very cavemannish. Maybe that was the intent??

Still though, it was entertaining enough. I’m not sure that I will continue along with the series, though I did give it 4 stars (probably more of a 3.5).

3. The Worst Best Man – Mia Sosa

Mediocre romance. It was fine. The audiobook kept me company on some walks.

4. The Lesbiana’s Guide to Catholic School – Sonora Reyes

A decent coming-of-age book for LGBTQ+ young adults. Lots of drama. Love the book cover!!

The only thing I have to say about this is that I was on my lunchbreak walk one day listening to this when I got stopped by two young guys canvassing in front of CVS for ASPCA. Usually when I have headphones on, people leave me alone, but the one guy was like HELLO WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO.

I paused the book and said, “Oh, it’s um, just an audiobook.”

“Oh? Which book?”

“Um….” AND FOR SOME REASON I FELT TOO EMBARRASSED TO SAY!? So I just stammered, “It’s just a young adult book….”

AND HE KEPT PRESSING ME SO I FINALLY FLASHED MY PHONE AT HIM. I DON’T KNOW WHY I FELT SO WEIRD ABOUT IT??

Oh I guess because I’m 43 and reading about a lesbian in Catholic School, lol.

Anyway, 20 minutes later and I walked away with the new title, Erin R Kelly, ASPCA Guardian Member.

Literally, I just can’t say no to animal stuff. I already make semi-regular donations to ASPCA but now I’m signed up to make monthly contributions to the legal team that helps prosecute animal abusers. I am such an advocate for this stuff that when I said I didn’t have my wallet, I promised that I would come back after work and finish signing up, but as I walked away, I thought, “WAIT A MINUTE…MY APPLE PAY!” So I WENT BACK immediately to finish signing up, and they were legit shocked at my honesty.

That’s what I will associate with this book now.

5. Bright – Jessica Jung

Dude, the sequel to Shine that all Girl’s Generation (or kpop in general) fans have been waiting for. The tea was SPICY. I love Jessica Jung and while we may never know what really happened between Jessica and GG, this book doesn’t really leave much to the imagination. It was entertaining and juicy. Would you like it if you weren’t already in the know about the real-life drama? Mmm, maybe! But probably not.

6. I’m Glad My Mom Died – Jennette McCurdy

Is it really shocking anymore to find out that a child star has suffered unspeakable levels of abuse? I guess not, but I was still so appalled and disgusted while reading this (Jennette narrates the audiobook btw). I was a huge fan of iCarly when it was on because it was the first show that Chooch REALLY LOVED. And we REALLY LOVED it together. I mean, I have an iCarly pocketbook and messenger bag for fuck’s sake. We lost our minds at the series finale.

Jennette’s character, Sam Puckett, was our favorite and you know, when you latch on to a TV show, the characters start to feel like family or friends. Knowing all these years later the disgusting sexualization, abuse, psychological control, and multiple eating disorders that Jennette endured while filming a show that so many children around the world loved…it makes me feel gross. This is why former child stars are on drugs or commit suicide. The industry alone is abusive and then when your own family isn’t protecting you, but contributing to the abuse themselves…well, it’s no wonder we see so many beloved stars take a turn.

I’m glad that Jennette was finally able to break free from the industry. Protect this beautiful angel!!

7. The It Girl – Ruth Ware

Ruth Ware is hit or miss for me, but I genuinely enjoyed this one. I love mystery/thrillers that bounce between present day and the past. This one is centered around the death of a man convicted a decade earlier of murdering an Oxford student. But there’s a reporter who doesn’t believe that he actually did it, and between the death of convicted murderer and this reporter asking those who knew the victim to sit for an interview, it’s forcing an old group of college friends to rehash the events leading up to the murder.

I thought it was entertaining! I liked the flashback parts the best. I kept picturing the “It Girl” as that bitch from the later seasons of Dawson’s Creek – Busy Phillips! Ugh, she’s so annoying.

8. Tripping Arcadia – Kit Mayquist

My Goodreads review: I was pretty bored throughout most of this, though it started off well enough to hook me. A big problem I had, and maybe this is me being a big dumb stoop, was that I had a difficult time really picturing what was going on and then it just got confusing as to who was doing what, re: the NYE party. I wish there had more to do with the aunt in Italy.

9. Good Rich People – Eliza Jane Brazier

That’s big NOPE from me, Bob.

I’m 0/2 with this author now so perhaps I will pass if/when she publishes a third.

10. The Surprising Power of a Good Dumpling – Wai Chim

Wow, this one was darker than I expected, and really very sad about a mother struggling with mental illness. I appreciated that it didn’t have a happy ending, but a realistic one. Also it made me want to go hog-wild on a bowl of dumplings.

(Specifically kimchi and dubu mandu.)

1. All I Want – Darcey Bell

Henry and I listened to this audiobook on the drive home from New Hampshire after my birthday and it was dumb, not scary, had really stupid characters. 100% forgettable. I only chose it because it was relatively short and we wanted something that we could finish the day, and I thought the cover was snazzy.

2. The Weird Sisters – Eleanor Brown 

The library’s recommendation service really did me dirty with this one. A trio of insufferable sisters, a cringey dad who speaks exclusively in Shakespeare quotes, no plot, messy narration. I truly didn’t care about any of these people except for the mom who spent the whole book in the background battling breast cancer.

What a waste of time.

3. The Last Guest House – Megan Miranda

This was OK but I think I need to recognize the fact that Megan Miranda books just aren’t for me.

4. The Summer Place – Jennifer Weiner

My least favorite book of Weiner’s so far because the characters were flat but I still cried at the end. I’m not a monster, you know.

5. Just Like Home – Sarah Gailey

What did I just read. This was fine, but not what I wanted and now that I’m recapping my August reads I’m just feeling depressed because did I read anything good and worth recommending to my bookish peeps??

Actually, this book was interesting and well-written, it just wasn’t what I was craving. I am SO PICKY with horror these days. It’s been a good long while since a book SCARED ME. Maybe I should just re-read Peter Straub’s books because barely anything compares to him in my eyes.

If you’ve read a really good horror novel recently, PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, tell me about it.

6. Memphis – Tara M. Stringfellow

OK OK, finally, a 5-STAR BOOK in August. I love generational family sagas and this one was IT. Wait. What’s that burning sensation in my face – oh that’s just the tears springing up at the memory of the amazing women in this book.

It was good. Read it.

7. Hide – Kiersten White

…aaaand right back to a 1-star read! Why-o why-o why-o did I not DNF this trash book-o? Ugh. I was reading this on our trip to Wildwood too and it was so fucking bad. SO FUCKING BAD.

Well, let’s go with my Goodreads review: One of the most terrible books I’ve ever read. All the characters (too many, IMO) felt like SIMS. The plot was a cluster. The whole time, I just kept saying WHO CARES. This is supposed to be an adult novel but it felt middle grade at best. (Not to knock middle grade books – I’ve read books from that age bracket that are so much entertaining and compelling than whatever this is.)

8. Just Like Mother – Anne Heltzel 

Four stars! Not what I was expecting, but pretty fucking creepy, I’m not going to lie. I love cult stuff and this was actually a good one with a pretty original plot. (I’m not sure that I would consider it horror though? Thriller, yes.)

9. Black Cake – Charmaine Wilkerson

That’s another 5-star book for me, Stu. Drop what you’re doing and pick this up STAT. And bake me a black cake while you’re at it.

10. Vacationland – Meg Mitchell Moore

OK this is the book that I wanted that recent Jennifer Weiner one to be. 4 stars, maybe even 4.5 – I was invested in this family! The kids were GREAT – I loved the chapters that included the letters one of the young, elementary school-aged daughters was writing home to her dad. Hilarious and heartwarming. Everyone in this book had my whole heart. If it was turned into a TV drama, something along the lines of Brothers and Sisters (LOVED THAT DAMN SHOW) I would consider getting cable again.

I need to read more from this broad and see if she legit has the potential to be a new fave author or if it was just a fluke. I WILL REPORT BACK, MAYBE.

11. Mika in Real Life – Emiko Jean

I really enjoyed this. I don’t know what else you want me to say. Mika was charming and lovable and the story was heart-warming.

12. The Pallbearers’ Club – Paul Tremblay

OK Paul Tremblay. I see you.

While this wasn’t as scary (or scary at all) as I had hoped, it was actually a really good story about the relationship of the guy and girl that made up the very short-lived Pallbearer’s Club. I loved that it was written as a novel transcript from the POV of the founding member of the club several decades later, with “editor’s notes” from the other member scribbled in the margins in red font. It’s lowkey a vampire story but mostly just a really sentimental exploration into the friendship between two people.

I wish I was better at reviewing books lol.

One of the Booktubers I follow on Goodreads said it much better: “Imagine you’re in a movie theatre watching a lonely and slow little indie film following 2 unlikely friends throughout the years, but you think you can vaguely hear an epic vampire movie playing through the walls, three theatres down.

That about sums up the reading experience for this book (and the amount of horror it contains.)” – BooksandLala, 2022

13. Cult Classic – Sloane Crosley

The fact that I was going to DNF actually scares me because this ended up being a solid 5-star read for me. OK listen, what happened was, I had the audiobook for this first, and I just couldn’t pay attention to it while out for a walk. In all honesty, this isn’t the type of book that can be “casually listened to.” It is SO SMARTLY WRITTEN and so BRILLIANTLY FUNNY, but it deserves your full and undivided attention. I’m glad I gave it another shot in physical book form because I became obsessed with it. It was so funny and weird and obscure, unlike anything I’ve read before.

It’s a fucking trip, and it was a great end to a subpar reading month.

That’s all. I read 13 books and only truly remember maybe half of them lol.

(Except you’d have to go back in time to read them in July 2022.)

July was a strange month. Chooch left us for most of it so I was very disoriented and sad. I tried to drown myself in books but a lot of the books sucked, so that was a big backfire. I read 12. Here they are in the order I read them, as usual.

1. The Summer Melted Everything – Tiffany McDaniel

SOLID FIVE STARS AND ONE OF MY NEW FAVORITE BOOKS OF ALL TIME.

I knew from the first chapter that this was going to shape up to be 5 stars, and one of the best books I’ve read. Ever. Period. It broke me. One of the most beautifully written coming of age tales ever. Every sentence is art.

It’s set in a small Ohio town in the early 80s and every last character is exquisitely crafted, the writing is — hold on, I’m crying lol. The writing made me feel like I was a part of something and I wanted to protect every member of the Bliss family until the end of time.

Please please please read this book. If you’re into audiobooks, the narrator of this one is exceptional.

2. All the Pretty Things – Emily Arsenault

Ssssssskip it.

3. Mrs. Caliban – Rachel Ingalls

This was written in the late 70s / early 80s I believe and it felt like something that would be assigned to read in college because it was so literary and full of meanings and allegory that I was definitely too stupid to understand, yet JUST SMART ENOUGH to pick up on. It was bizarre and I did laugh out loud quite a few times, but then by the end it got too soap opera-y. But I gave it a solid 3 stars for it’s weirdness.

4. The Scapegoat – Sara Davis

I low-key hated this book and every character in it, and also I had no idea what was going on for most of it because I didn’t care. I don’t want to talk about this book anymore because it was stupid. Read it if you want though, I don’t care.

5. A Certain Hunger – Chelsea G. Summers

Suuuuuper graphic book about a cannibalistic food critic telling her story from prison. Literally all you need to know. I found the writing to be an absolute delight though the book felt fairly dense and I couldn’t read it for very long lengths of time. The human parts didn’t bother me, but there were some parts that detailed animal butchering and processing that I obviously was not a fan of.

Overall, a pretty quirky and dark book from the POV of a female serial killer.

6. I Kissed Shara Wheeler – Casey McQuiston

I was really stoked for this because I loved One Last Stop and McQuiston writes some snip-snappy dialogue that would have been right at home on the old WB back in 2000. But this didn’t get it done for me. I just didn’t really understand why we cared where Shara Wheeler went (look, I cared so little about her that I originally spelled her name “Shari” in the title and had to go back and correct it. I don’t know, read this if you want. But it’s kind of dumb. Although I did cry at the end.

OMG what is the matter with me.

7. The Perfect Stranger – Megan Miranda 

I put this on for Henry and me to listen to on the way home from Waldameer and it was abysmal. I should have DNF’d it. It was so over the top, the characters were flat, the plot was confusing. The back and forth with the timeline was frustrating. Megan Miranda just kind of writes like an amateur, sorry, but THAT IS MY OPINION.

8. You Made a Fool Out of Death with Your Beauty – Akwaeke Emezi

Shit, I have loved every one of their books that I have read so my expectations were SOARIN’ for this. But this one just didn’t move me like the other books there. It felt just like any other romance, really, and speaking of romance, I DID NOT GET THE ATTRACTION BETWEEN THE TWO PEOPLE?? It just didn’t work for me. It didn’t even feel like this book was written by the same person who wrote The Death of Vivek Oji and Freshwater, to be honest.

There’re some REALLY VIVID food descriptions in  this though and I was there for that.

9. His & Hers – Alice Feeney

A pretty solid thriller with some excellent twists that I definitely did not see coming! I think it’s decided that UK thrillers are my faves.

10. A Touch of Jen – Beth Morgan

I knew going into this that a lot of people hated this book which is actually what inspired to me to read it. I needed to know for myself. The verdict is that while I didn’t outright it, it also wasn’t a very enjoyable reading experience because all of the characters were so unsufferable and the story itself was….I mean, I dunno, wtf was that?? Basically a couple are obsessed with this bitch that the guy-part of the couple (Remy) used to work with. He’s clearly infatuated with her and then his gf starts trying to be like her and they role play about her and it’s just all very uncomfortable. Then something happens somewhere past the halfway mark which actually made me scream and feel a little sad, and it just wasn’t a good time.

Even now, being forced to think back on it, I feel really icky.

Also I forgot that there was one good character and that was Jake the Roommate. Remy can get fucked with a rusty pole, honestly. What a cunt he was.

Um, I gave it three stars because it made me have feelings and the writing itself was actually pretty decent – I even LOL’d a few times. But there were a lot of chapters that were so boring and new-agey. Read at your own risk.

11. So Happy For You – Celia Laskey 

OH YEAH, BOY. This was the book. The thoroughly entertaining, super quick read, thrilling and delightful book that I had been looking for this summer. If you hate weddings and tradition, this is for you. This book was wild. I’ve heard a lot of booktubers say that main character was grating but I didn’t find her to be so at all – I thought she was a great character and I loved her ideals.

12. Promise Not to Tell – Jennifer McMahon 

I read one of McMahon’s newer books and absolutely hated it, but I still gave this one a whirl based on the library’s recommendation. It’s one of her older books (from the early 00s, I think) and I actually really enjoyed it. I listened to it on audio because I’m currently in the middle of a new gemming project but it’s a gift for a friend so more on that after the Pie Party, but this book was PERFECT to carry me through some lonely hours of gemming alone. It had a dual timeline but unlike dumb Megan Miranda, Jennifer McMahon made it work well here. I LOVED the earlier timeline with the Potato Girl character and commune life – it was all so creepy and made me so nervous even in broad daylight.

A solid summer thriller / kind of ghost story-ish.

The month was June, and these books were read.

1. The Family Chao – Lan Samantha Chang

Leftover from Asian Readathon. Three stars. I only cared about the dog.

2. The Last Mrs. Parrish – Liv Constantine

Solid domestic thriller! I love it when a book blindsides me and this one definitely did.

3. Once Upon a K-Prom – Kat Cho

Nothing ground-breaking here, just a cute YA centered around Kpop – it was just the light, fluffy read that I needed, like a palate cleanser before moving onto meatier books. My favorite part about this is that each member of the Kpop group had their own page of member facts and it would list who their idols were growing up (G-Dragon was mentioned for one!) and who their friends are (NCT and Stray Kids came up a lot for this!). I loved also that BTS was not mentioned AT ALL but I did kind of feel like the fictional Kpop group was based off of them, except that one of the members was American which is not the case with BTS. I always appreciate when other Kpop groups are name-dropped because BTS is such an obvious, lazy, boring choice.

4. Yerba Buena – Nina LaCour

OK. Nina LaCour is like, the little fucking darling of Booktube, right?

But I tried one of her other books and hated it so much. When I got this book from the library, I didn’t even realize it was hers. However, I believe this is her first foray into adult contemporary (she typically writes YA but it’s the super pretentious, navel-gazey kind that makes me roll my eyes). Um, ha. Whoa there. Consider my opinion changed BIGLY. This book was so beautiful, the characters were emotional in a way that they felt 100% real to me. I just wanted the best for everyone and I couldn’t wait to see how the two narratives were going to collide. The most sublime and believable Sapphic love story I’ve read in quite a while. I’m crying just thinking about it.

5. The Last Final Girl – Stephen Graham Jones

When am I going to quit trying to love this fucking guy? Horror movies are my absolute fave so the references were not lost on me, but this book just wasn’t it. Written like a movie script, I get what it was trying to do but it was confusing and hard to follow. So fucking cheesy.

6. Greenwich Park – Katherine Faulkner

Really twisty domestic thriller – kept me hooked and entertained on my daily walks!

I think I’m starting to prefer British thrillers over American at this point. Far less duds!

7. A Deadly Inside Scoop – Abby Collette

I apparently gave this book a four, but my knee-jerk reaction to seeing this cover was that I only moderately enjoyed it. Lots of over-the-top characters and suspects which I anticipated going into this but the thing that most bothered me was how many times people were like, “YOUR ICE CREAM SHOP IS OPEN IN THE WINTER?” Um, people eat ice cream all the fucking time, no matter what season, and also in the book I’m pretty sure it was only October?? I couldn’t get past that. It was so strange. Aside from that, it was cute. I don’t think I’ll be continuing the series though. I think what I’m learning about myself if that I prefer sinister, dark mysteries over the cute and cozy lot.

8. Version Zero – David Yoon

I hated this book so bad that I don’t even want to review it.

But I will say that where I changed my negative opinion of Nina LaCour after reading her first foray into adult novels, my positive opinion of David Yoon based on his two exceptional YA books was tarnished a bit for me after reading his first adult novel. A caveat: I should have steered clear from the get-go because I do not like sci-fi / techy books and that’s exactly what this was. Also, the characters were very poorly written and I was stunned because typically David excels at character development. This just made me feel so uncomfy and bored.

9. Delilah Green Doesn’t Care – Ashley Herring Blake

This romance was fucking presh. I loved the small town vibes, strained family dynamics, chaotic wedding planning, snappy dialogue. I WILL be continuing this series!

10. All the Wrong Places – Joy Fielding

OK Joy, I see you, and I’m sorry that I never heard of you until last month when I snatched this book from a nearby Little Free Library. What a sick, fast-paced thriller about a serial killer who snags his victims from online dating sites. Seems like a tired concept, sure, but this one is very much focused on the relationships and lives of four women so you’re just waiting for the other shoe to drop the whole  time. I was pleasantly surprised with this one!

***

You have now finished reading WHAT I READ IN JUNE. Please enjoy the rest of your day.

Blog, this was the worst / most disappointing Asian Read-a-Thon I’ve had since I started in 2020. I only read 12 books and a lot of those didn’t do it for me. I will make this quick.

1. The Night Shift – Alex Finlay

Right off the bat, the readathon was off on the wrong foot. I had run out of time in April to read this book and didn’t want to return it to the library so I flipped through the pages and saw that one of the characters was South Asian. Boom, Asian rep. A stretch, but I allowed it. (He was also pretty much the best character too, in a book full of cardboard cutouts.) The premise of this book sounded awesome (a thriller that starts off at a Blockbuster in the 90s) but the execution was just sloppy. Characters were flat, and I barely remember it at this point. I gave it a 3 on Goodreads but more like 2.5.

Blockbuster deserved better than that.

SO DID THE ASIAN CHARACTER.

2. Grass – Keum Suk Gendry-Kim

Growing up American with a shitty history curriculum, I didn’t learn about Korean comfort women until I developed my own interest in Korea as an adult and saw firsthand all of the memorials and statues around Korea when I visited. This graphic novel details the true experience of a woman who was sold into Japanese enslavement during the Japanese occupation of Korea and it is, needless to day, harrowing, graphic, infuriating, and nightmarish. The stories of these women need to be heard and this is a good starting point.

This is one of the comfort women memorials we saw in Paju, South Korea.

3. Fiona and Jane – Jean Chen Ho

A series of vignettes about two Taiwanese American friends. I liked some stories better than others but I’m always here for a coming-of-age tale. I loved the cover a lot and of course was happy any time there were Korean references which is pretty much every book nowadays it seems.

4. Tokyo Ever AFter – Emiko Jean

Look, I needed a YA palate cleanser, OK? This book was a delight. Princess Diaries but make it Japanese. I LOVE books that are set in other countries, especially east Asia, and this delivered interesting cultural references and made me want to revisit Japan in a big way.

5. Arsenic and Adobo – Mia P. Manansala

6. An Emotion of Great Delight – Tahereh Mafi

7. Popular Hits of the Showa Era – Ryu Murakami

YES BITCH. Japanese horror is my jam and this was one of the best books I read in May, and the whole year. It was so gross and violent and HILARIOUS, the characters were wild, the whole book was a dumpster fire in the very best possible way. It was a fucking RIDE. I loved this so much, screamed, “OMFG” numerous times throughout, and then laughed like a maniac when I finished it, like I had just gotten done hanging out with the funniest friend I have. I really felt like I was in this book.

It is very graphic though and there were a few moments when I had to put it down because I was feeling it.

I’ve also read In the Miso Soup by this author which I really liked, and also one of the sickest horror movies I’ve ever seen was based off his book “Audition,” so I have a good track record with this guy and should really try to read more from him.

8. Dava Shastri’s Last Day – Kirthana Ramisetti

OMFG die already. That’s all, that’s the review. One star, hated everyone.

9. Ayesha At Last – Uzma Jalaluddin

Billed as a modern-day Muslim Pride and Prejudice and it’s exactly that. I really enjoyed. Main characters that you really felt good about rooting for, eye-opening cultural lessons, and just a GOOD love story. I needed this after that Dava shit show up there. (Also this cover is gorge.)

10. Minor Feelings: An Asian American Reckoning – Cathy Park Hong

Solid five stars. This is a must-read. Part memoir, part history lesson, it’s a beautifully-written collection of essays that every American should read, regardless of race, to have a better understanding of the minor feelings that come with growing up Asian in America.

11. Joan is Okay – Weike Wang

This was a weird, quirky little book. It’s weird to read books that are already referencing COVID, but I thought that this one did it well when that time came. I thought the writing was excellent and definitely need to read “Chemistry” soon.

12. Dial “A” for Aunties – Jesse Q. Sutanto

A bunch of high-strung Chinese-Indonesian aunties trying to cover up a murder, solve an un-related crime, and work a wedding all at once? This book was so slapstick, well-paced, with fleshed-out characters that pop off the pages. It’s so over-the-top and completely implausible, but that was the intent and it works. I will definitely continue on with this series because I need more aunties! (Highly recommend this as an audiobook – the narrator is excellent and brought the aunties to life!)

Let’s barrel through this quickly. It was a very up and down month.

1. Finlay Donovan Knocks ‘Em Dead – Elle Cosimano

OK, usually my the second book in a series, I start to lose interest, but Finlay Donovan and her sidekick Vero are hysterical and I love how over-the-top these books are. It has a very modern day Lucille Ball / I Love Lucy feel to it. So good. Light, upbeat, and entertaining. This would be the PERFECT beach/airplane read, too.

2. 5 Centimeters Per Second – Yukiko Seike & Makoto Shinkai

This was OK but I think I just don’t really like manga. Reading in reverse just isn’t my jam.

3. Such a Quiet Place – Megan Miranda

This was fine. I gave it a three. I wouldn’t recommend it but I also wouldn’t…NOT…recommend it. You know what I mean. A basic thriller. Cannot remember a single character but there also wasn’t anything “wrong” with this either.

4. Heartstopper: Volume 4 – Alice Oseman

You already know: FIVE STARS, A MILLION AND FIVE HEARTS. This graphic novel series has really touched in me and made me feel more emotions than most any other book I’ve read recently, so don’t get caught up in the YA-ness of it all. This installment deals heavily with eating disorders and mental illness and it was done in such a thoughtful and sensitive way.

If you haven’t watched the Netflix series, I highly recommend it. Especially if you particularly are looking for a TV show that doubles as a psychic bear hug.

Also? I read this in the car during our spring break road trip and that vacation was sooooo good so I will always associate these two things with each other now and that makes it even better.

5. How to Kill Your Best Friend – Lexie Elliott

Very very very far-fetched but who reads thrillers for a dose of reality, you know? I thought this was a pretty entertaining book about a group of friends – who were all on their college swim team, this is somewhat relevant – reuniting at some South Asian island resort (Thailand, maybe? I can’t remember the exact location now) where threats and murder ensue. This was apparently the second book I read by this author, and I liked them both so now perhaps I should make a point of remembering their name.

6. Real Easy – Marie Rutkoski

This book was t-r-a-s-h. Entirely too many characters. Shitty dialogue. Predictable plot. Best thing is the cover but what does that even have to do with the book, you might ask? WHO KNOWS. I urge you to skip this.

Oh, apparently I actually wrote a review on Goodreads:

OK hear me out. The story itself was good, and the strip club setting was interesting. But the writing was unbelievably frustrating – it was jumbled and very “try-hard” at times. Like come on, I don’t give a shit that the Denny’s waitress had husky blue eyes flecked with gold. Get over yourself.

Also, so many damn characters, and most of them were strippers with two names (real and stripper name) so it was extremely difficult to keep them straight. Same with the cops. So many. Who even are you.

Yep. That sounds about right.

7. A Bad Day For Sunshine – Darynda Jones

If Lorelai Gilmore was Star Hollow’s sheriff, but Stars Hollow was in New Mexico. That makes it sound like it could be better than it is. I mean, it wasn’t the worst book and I liked how every chapter opened with either a witty phrase from one of the town’s shops’ signs, or a blurb from the police blotter, etc. It really helped back up the “KOOKY TOWN” premise. I liked that it went back and forth between the mom, Sunshine, and her high school daughter who was finding it hard to adjust to a new school having just moved back to Sunshine’s hometown. The characters were quirky and the writing was good but I just wasn’t really into it enough to continue on with the series.

8. Reckless Girls – Rachel Hawkins

I gave this a three on Goodreads apparently but my initial reaction when it was time to review this here was one of annoyance and mild anger because I think I actually hated this. It’s an adult thriller but it came off as a bit Young Adult-y at times, like maybe I would have enjoyed this is high school. I was hoping that the secluded island setting would offer a bit of escapism but it just felt suffocating.

9. Fool Me Once – Ashley Winstead

Bro. I was a little disappointed when I saw that Ashley Winstead’s follow-up to her debut novel was going to be a romance.  I LOVED last year’s “In My Dream I Hold a Knife” so much, and that was a dark academia / thriller. I picked this up anyway out of curiosity and I am so glad that I did because it was fantastic. Laugh out loud funny, realistic/believable character dynamics and dialogue, and a story that I actually cared about. It was a wild ride and I was rooting for our main character the whole time, in both her romantic endeavors and professional growth. The side characters  were practically punching their way off the pages, the hijinx were hilarious and believable, and the feel good factor was off the charts. My face hurt from all the smiling I did while reading this.

SO GOOD and I am now anxiously waiting to see what Winstead is whipping up next. This broad has written her way into my heart. This was my second 5-star of the month! See?? I’m not *that* picky.

10. The Unsinkable Greta James – Jennifer E. Smith

Wow.  To think that I almost returned what ended up being my THIRD FIVE STAR BOOK OF THE MONTH back to the library before reading it because I was afraid I was running out of time before Asian Read-a-thon started. That would have been a fatal error because this book, despite being set on a cruise to my least favorite place in the whole world – ALASKA, literally cruised its way into my heart. Almost immediately, I had a feeling that this one was going to become a forever favorite and I was right. The writing was fresh, the dialogue was SNAPPY (clearly dialogue is super important to me), and the story itself was a heartwarmer but also a heartBREAKER.

Greta is a somewhat-famous musician, a fact that her dad can’t stand. Greta gets guilted by her brother to take her recently-deceased mother’s spot on an anniversary cruise that her parents had planned with two of their married couple friends. Now they have this floating prison to attempt to salvage their relationship, and it is an amazing process to follow. This book had me straight up laughing out loud on one page and then sobbing like a bitch five pages later. In fact, I kept getting a lump in my throat every time I tried to give Henry a synopsis.

I cannot recommend this enough. It’s fantastic. I need to add more books from this author to my TBR because her writing is totally my style.

I don’t have an intro.

But I guess that was my intro.

1. No One Belongs Here More Than You – Miranda July

See last month’s review of the Miranda July book I read, but subtract one star because: short stories.

2. Inside V – Paula Priamos

I had never heard of this book, nor this author, but I needed something to listen to while tromping around the ‘hood and this came up as recommended on Scribd. Dude, it was good! A domestic thriller/mystery, great pacing, kept my attention. Would recommend to you, just like Scribd did to me.

3. Lemon – Kwon Yeo-Sun

You know I love me some translated-from-Korean thrillers and word about this one had been spreading like wildfire on the bookish webs because suddenly everyone is on my level now with Korean stuffs. This wasn’t bad, but also a tad disappointing I guess because of all the hype. It’s about the murder of a high school girl and at times I was kind of confused because the chapters switch narrators and timelines. I would say it’s more of like…suspenseful literary fiction. I gave it a three.

4. Grown Ups – Marian Keyes

Also a three for me because it was UNNECESSARILY LONG – like over 500 pages with tiny type. It’s basically like reading an entire season of a dramedy about an extended family and honestly it was just too much. Too many characters. Borderline annoying dialogue. Only two characters in the book were even slightly compelling to me and I enjoyed the tension of their relationship but then the end is soooooo unsatisfying. And one of the characters had an eating disorder and I’m not going to lie, I was pretty triggered. This one got so much love and hype from some of my favorite Bristish Booktubers and I’m kind of shocked.

It was entertaining enough but I don’t feel inspired to pick up anything else by this author.

5. Reprieve – James Han Mattson

I thought I would love this. A haunted house/escape room in the 90s? Fuck yeah. But again, no compelling characters and I was kind of bored.

6. The Hawthorne Legacy – Jennifer Lynn Barnes

The problem with me and book series is that by the time the next book comes out, I can’t remember anything from the first book. So, I was lost through nearly the entire first half. There are two many Hawthorne brothers to keep track of, and two of them are basically the same person in my mind. But it’s still a fun read, I like the mystery/puzzle-solving aspect of it, and there’s a love triangle that held my interest. But the real star of the show is that goddamn book cover. Ye-ow-sah.

7. All Her Little Secrets – Wanda M. Morris 

Dude. This was EXCELLENT. (OMG that’s literally what my Goodreads review was and I didn’t even realize that until after I typed this, lol.) And this was a DEBUT? 4 stars from me, Sam. Loved our main girl in this and was screaming at times. Trying to get Henry to read it – you should read it too!

8. True Crime – Samantha Kolesnik

Trash. I gave it one star because Goodreads doesn’t allow for NO STAR ratings. This was just “how much shock value can I stuff into a novella?” and it failed. This was not interesting, entertaining, or even slightly well-written.

9. When I Am Through With You – Stephanie Kuehn

Actually hated this. Not a single likable character and then it turned into a survival story which I dislike so I guess this is on me for not knowing more going in. It was so boring that I kept forgetting the main character’s name and then I couldn’t keep the other characters straight. Seemed like too many people and not everyone even mattered, so….if this hadn’t been an audio book, I would have DNFd it but I needed something to listen to on my walk(s) one day when I was off work and didn’t feel like looking for something else.

ALSO, I DON’T HAVE TO EXPLAIN MYSELF TO YOU, MOM.

10. Made In Korea – Sarah Suk

Just the palate (eye ball?) cleanser I needed after reading back-to-back 1-star books. This was adorable, Korean, and straight-up fun. I wish someone was selling Korean beauty products from their locker when I was in high school! Also, I love reading books written by Korean American authors because they typically will throw in some Korean words and I always know what it is before it’s explained. That’s just a really good feeling. I can’t speak the damn language but I have at least learned some things!

11. House 23 – Eli Yance 

Did we ever learn why this was called House 23? Did we ever care? This was dumb. It started out intriguingly and I was in it to win it, but then it got real dumb real fast and ended up being so unsatisfying. Apparently, most people on Goodreads agree with me on this so I should have probably put some stock in the low ratings before diving into this.

12. Ain’t Burned All the Bright – Jason Reynolds / Jason Griffin

Oof. This one hits hard. Beautiful art paired with poignant text about the last several years in America, during Covid and the BLM movement, my eyes were burning with tears.

This is from the synopsis because it explains it perfectly:

And so for anyone who didn’t really know what it means to not be able to breathe, REALLY breathe, for generations, now you know. And those who already do, you’ll be nodding yep yep, that is exactly how it is.

Yeah, this one really knocked something loose in me.

13. The Cartographers – Peng Shepherd

Um hello, Peng Shepherd. This was MAGICAL and SWEEPING. I never thought I’d care about a book about maps but this had me thinking I was really part of the action. I was IN THIS STORY. I loved every fucking character. I loved the glimpses into the lives of the young Cartographers. I might actually want to learn how to read a map now. (Future Henry is reading this, choking on whatever Hostess product he inhales in the privacy of the FAYGO FACTORY, like “YEAH RIGHT.”)

Five stars for me, Mary.

OK BYE.