You guys rioted* when my other serial killer notecard set didn’t include Jeffrey Dahmer, so here is the much-anticipated second series with 8 more vicious bastards to terrorize mail recipients, including the ever-popular Jeffrey Dahmer.
*(OK literally just one person was like “No Dahmer?” on Instagram. But hey this is proof that I consider your feedback!
)
Each card features 1970s wallpaper backgrounds and famous quotes from each killer, or as I like to alternately call these: Things Not to Say on a First Date.
Or job interview.
Or ever, probably.
These cards are the A2 size, smaller than the single cards I sell in this shop. 8 envelopes are included for free. I was going to charge extra for them but my boyfriend showed me the definition of “dick move” and it said “Charging extra for envelopes.”
This set includes: Jeffrey Dahmer, Carl Panzram, Charles Manson, BTK/Dennis Rader, Gary Ridgway/Green River Killer, Henry Lee Lucas, Richard Speck, and Andrei Chikatilo (somehow I realized that in the 10 years I’ve been making these cards, I don’t have a single Chikatilo design, like America’s the only country with deranged killers).
I wanted to give the second series more of a retro feel, whereas the first set is more of a “granny’s stationary drawer” feel. I had so much perusing various 1970s wallpaper designs, that’s for sure. (Much less fun looking up killer quotes, though.)
Gary Ridgway.
Henry Lee Lucas.
BTK.
I think we can all use that “head dropping” excuse though, right? I was definitely dropped on my head as a kid and also as a teenager when Jared and Damien were trying to drag me over to the window of our 8th grade homeroom because my mega-crush was outside and I was like DONT MAKE ME TALK TO HIM and one of them DROPPED ME ON MY HEAD because I was not going willingly and I saw animated bluebirds for real, you guys.
Granted, I haven’t killed anyone or even tortured or bound anyone yet but at least if I decide to, I know I have a SOLID EXCUSE.
J/K please don’t report me.
Andrei Chikatilo
This one just makes me laugh, but also it makes me wish that some group of people would want to buy my brains when I die.
Charles Manson, le duh.
Has there ever been a more relevant sentiment uttered by a cult leader? Everybody out here trying to out-crazy each other, man.
Anyway, this note card is blank inside and if you’re like me and work in a city, it could easily be filled up with the nutso things you see during your lunch break strolls through downtown alleys. For example, one time some dude walked to the nearby Army Navy store, bought a machete, and then used it to chop a dude’s hand RIGHT ACROSS FROM WHERE I WORK. No one died or anything, but there was a crime scene with blood so you better believe I went out there and took pictures of it. After I was sure that it wasn’t Jason Voorhees, that is. Turns out it was an isolated incident and the two guys knew each other and were fighting over a broad. A tale as old as time. Or at least as old as 2014.
Jeffrey Dahmer.
Richard Speck
Fun fact about me: I had a cat named Nicotina but I started calling her Speck one day, one of those instances* where you see one of your pets and just blurt out a new name for them, because Richard Speck happened to be on my mind for some reason, and then that name stuck to the point where my son was born several years later and that was the only name he ever knew for her.
*(I also called her Breakfast Nook and Pickles.)
***
These sets come with envelopes, perfect for slipping in a handwritten excuse signed by a parent. Any parent. I’m a parent* and can sign it for you if you want.
*(I know, right?!)
They can also be purchased individually, so just send me a convo if, say, you only want the Gary Ridgway one or something. I will accommodate!
In other greeting card news, I’m working on some new Kpop cards for my Hello Hanguk shop and hope to have a THIRD set of mini-Valentines ready for 2019, and also some Christmas card sets. I have not had very much time to give these shops the proper attention that they deserve, but I’m trying to be more mindful of carving out time. So if there are any killers or Kpop groups/idols you want to see featured on some cards, let me know!