Aug 042016
 


Throwback to yesterday when I was on my lunch break and Henry called and was all “Chooch is down there on the North Shore, kayaking” (because: summer camp) and I was clear on the other side of town, but I RAN in the 89 degree heat all the way to the dumb kayaking thing, I even JAYWALKED which I’m a firm disbeliever in; once I got close enough to the river (an entire section of the river walk was closed up so I looked like a tourist trying to find her way ugh), I creeped on all the kids with my bad eyesight but couldn’t seem to find Chooch and also didn’t have much time left so I walked back to work sopping in sweat, and sent him this picture of the river. 

“I tried to find you:(” I texted. 

“I didn’t go kayaking today. That was yesterday,” he replied. 

I mean, I’m sure it would have been pretty anticlimactic even if he had been there because what would happen really? I would blow exaggerated kisses to him and he would tell the other kids I’ve never seen that broad before in my life and then we would all go on with our lives. 

And maybe that would have happened – ON TUESDAY.

Get fucked, Henry. 

Say it don't spray it.

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