The Abandonment Brouhaha: 2 Chooch Tales

I made Chooch watch the British Open with me on Sunday. Parts of it, anyway. (I actually don’t know anything about golf;  I just really wanted to share with him my inexplicable love for Phil Mickelson.) Approximately 2 seconds in, Chooch had completely peaced out. I believe his exact words were, “Oh my god, STFU!” Let’s just say that me watching golf is akin to me riding the Caterpillar. Lots of from-the-gut yelling and high energy cheering. The only thing Chooch took away from the experience was the word “brouhaha,” which he heard one of the commentators say. Except he doesn’t believe that it’s a real word, but evil laughter.

Later that day, we went to see Thor and in the middle of the movie, Chooch leaned over and hoarsely laughed “brouhaha” into my ear, which resulted in me cracking up after I had spent the majority of the movie shushing him.  (It also made me crack up when one of the scenes was a bunch of  galaxy shots, and when a particularly brown cluster of gross outerspace scenery was shown, Chooch said, “That looks dirty. Like daddy’s poop.” I totally lost it.)

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While I was at work last night, Henry took his mom grocery shopping. It was raining pretty hard and I guess Henry’s mom jokingly told Chooch she was going to make him get out of the car and walk. (I’m sure he provoked this threat.) Then she said she was just kidding, that she would never actually try to get rid of him, to which Chooch responded, “Mommy would. She tries to get rid of me all the time.”

The boy speaks the truth.

And now if you’ll excuse me, Henry’s on vacation this week and if he thinks he’s going to sleep past 9:00 every morning, well, he’s about to find out how very misinformed he is.