Sep 162017

OK man, I’m really trying to blow through these Chicago posts because I want to write about the Taeyang concert, but my penchant for chronology won’t let me skip ahead. So let’s whiz through the second half of our Sunday in Chicago, because really it can be summarized by: lots of walking, more Chooch injuries, me pouting at lunch which was really projecting because I had pre-show nerves big time. It’s hard enough going to shows by myself in my own city, let alone some giant metropolis like Chicago. My nerves were shook, yo.

After Navy Pier, we decided to check out Lincoln Park (I type “Linkin” every single time, ugh) because of the free zoo. I have some mixed feelings about zoos, which is pretty obvious, but Henry and Chooch like them and anything that was going to eat up a few hours without also eating up our bank account was pretty desirable.

Henry thought he knew for sure how to get there via bus, but he done fucked up twice and we wound up standing in front of some church somewhere, waiting for a Lyft. (Chooch and I went into the church to snoop around because something was going on, no not mass, thanks for suggesting the obvious though, but then we were afraid of getting usurped by the holy spirit so we split.)

Eventually, we made it, and the road into the park where the Lyft dude dropped us off was blocked off to traffic. Henry decided he wanted to cross over, so we followed him and somehow it ended up looking like we were just casually strolling in the middle of the road instead of crossing because Henry kept changing his mind and Chooch and I (aka the Lemmings) kept blindly following him, so some lady cop YELLED AT US not to walk in the street even though it was closed to traffic, and if there is one thing I hate, it’s being YELLED AT by AUTHORITY FIGURES, so I was straight RUFFLED at this point and snottily yelled, “THANKS FOR GETTING US YELLED AT, ASSHOLE” and the cop was all, ‘I just don’t want y’all to get hit,” and I was like, “HUH, THE ROAD IS CLOSED THOUGH?!” and then SUDDENLY this beautiful car came zooming past us, followed closely by a car with like a hundred cameras hanging off it.

“WHAT IS GOING ON?!” I asked the cop, and she acted like she wasn’t sure if she should tell me, but then she stuttered, “Cadillac commercial.”


That’s boring.

I was really mad about getting yelled at for like the next 45 minutes though and I kept replaying it over and over again in my thick head.

But enough about COPS. Lincoln Park was so wonderful, like being in the country while still having good cell service and not getting suspicious stares from the locals for being CITY FOLK.

The zoo was full-fledged, too, and I can’t believe it was free. I had plans to look up how that’s sustainable, but then I remembered that I am a half-assed blogger who only delivers partial facts so why start being accurate now.

Some girls asked me to take their picture in front of this statue and then when they saw me getting ready to take Chooch’s picture, the one was all, “Do you want me to  take a picture of you guys too?” and in my head I was like SO MANY NOs, A GIANT BUSHEL OF NOPES but she was so nice for offering so I relinquished my phone and posed stiffly next to Chooch.

It turned out OK and Henry was like, “Yeah, because a stranger took it and not me.” I HATE EVERY PICTURE HENRY HAS EVER TAKEN OF ME. It’s like he purposely aims for the worst angles and timing in case anyone on the Internet ever decides to woo me, Henry can be like BRO THIS IS WHAT SHE REALLY LOOKS LIKE OK.

Also, I’m excited that Chooch’s hair has grown out some since these pictures were taken. His latest cut was WAY TOO SHORT and did nothing to complement his cute BABY CHEEKS.

Then some old man sidled up next to us at the puma exhibit and schooled us on how the government wants us to believe that pumas are endangered but he’s from Florida and they’re more prevalent there than deer, and etc etc., please stop talking to us, human interaction is uncomfortable, stop looking at me, I feel ya, pumas.

I have no idea what that was all about or how much of it was even true, like maybe he’s a disgruntled former zoo employee trying to start rumors?

In any case, we only stayed at the zoo for about 90 minutes before it was time for an afternoon feeding. Henry thought he found a vegetarian place within walking distance, but we just kept walking and walking and walking and I was getting so irritated, partially from hunger but also a lot of it was pre-show nerves, so we ended up going to Del Seoul which wasn’t originally an option because Chooch hates everything with flavor, but we were like BOY YOU BEST DEAL WITH THIS SHIT and he ended up really liking his tofu taco, and I liked mine too but I only ordered one instead of two and then got unreasonably upset about this when really it was just PROJECTION because MAJOR INTERNAL STRESS was happening. This show was a big deal for me and I was so worried it was going to be awful since I was going alone.

I was also mad because Henry got kimchi fries but there was way too much pork belly crap to eat around and I was like, dying for kimchi because I eat it every day, yet when Henry was like, “Just go back up and order a side of kimchi” I acted like this was the most offensive and ludicrous suggestion ever and refused.

At least I can admit that I’m a fucking spoiled brat? Even if it takes two weeks. And I will never say it out loud to Henry’s face.

By this point, it was late afternoon and I needed to go back to the hotel to “rest” (LOL yeah right, this never happens) and change for the concert, so we got back on the L and made it back to our beloved Chinatown without issue. I liked the L! It wasn’t as cool as the subway in Toronto, but it got us where we needed to be fairly easily and we never had to use our car once the whole weekend.

We were going to stop at Ice Max in Chinatown for ice cream but the line was out the door. The rolled ice cream place across the street was even worse. So we stopped there on the way home from the Taeyang concert around 11pm that night.

[The Taeyang concert will be its own separate post, because there’s just so much to say and this post has gone on long enough.]

Pittsburgh just recently jumped on the rolled ice cream trend too but I’m glad that our first foray into this world was in Chinatown. It felt way more legit and authentic, and it was like a fucking party up in that bitch.

Even at 11pm on a Sunday, that place was packed, but since we had nowhere to be, the wait didn’t bother us at all. Besides, the energy and atmosphere of Ice Max was so entertaining! It was like leaving the concert and going to an after party. (OMG WHAT IF TAEYANG HAD ROLLED IN.)

If cereal is a flavor, I will choose it every time. Fruity Pebbles ice cream, topped with strawberries and more Fruity Pebbles, and fucking Pocky man.  I don’t even care what Henry and Chooch got.

What a way to end the night.

  One Response to “Lincoln Park with the Boyzzz”

  1. The zoo in Washington DC is free as well. Leave it to Pittsburgh to charge for every little thing.

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