Dude OK just stop, slow down – I took these top two snaps from the car window as Chooch was taxiing us to our second lighthouse of the day. Just so serene! Was I in a surly, snurfly, sniffly mood still? Hundred percent! But even that screen of psychological disdain I was lurking behind like the silhouette of an 80s star slasher wasn’t so opaque that I couldn’t appreciate nature’s beauty!

Sometimes I think that I could be a boat person, just sitting on a pouf on whatever the deck is called, a starboard or whatever, sipping a bellini and reading some trash novel. But then I remember who I am and how I am unable to unwind and relax like a normal person and I would likely go stir crazy and freak out in the middle of a body of water which will culminate in me belly-flopping off the side of the boat and then having a nervous breakdown because I am terrified of THE THINGS in the SEA. And lakes. And rivers. And ponds. I’m not even too thrilled about public swimming pools, if we’re going all in here.

But I dunno, maybe an hour or two would be nice.

(And then I watch YouTube videos of whales flipping over boats and revert to my original anti-boat stance.)

Yes, I’ve seen beaches and oceans before but Maine just hits different, OK? (I think this was technically Penobscot Bay?)

(Penobscot is amazing to say. Love the mouthfeel.)

We had to park in a little lot and walk through a trail in order to access the lighthouse and it was a very enjoyable walk. Look at these views!

Why can’t I look as loose and cool as Chooch?

I’M ALWAYS TIGHT AND COILED INSTEAD.

Also this Hipstamatic filter makes me look like I have a skin condition.

I want to go back to Maine and just do slow tourism, which is really against everything I believe in, but being here honestly made me wish we had more time so we could just slow down and be outside at our leisure. I just don’t know how to plan trips around … “nothing.” The pain purpose is always amusement parks or concerts, sometimes both.

He was super annoyed with me because there were all these little, treacherous paths that went down to the water and he wanted to go down them but I was having jelly-legs and wouldn’t let him. Jelly-legs is how I know I’m truly a mom. (YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN ME WATCHING THE OLYMPICS, THEY WERE ALL MY CHILDREN.)

I don’t know man. I just kept envisioning him tumbling down there in Instagram reel-format with Culture Club playing on 2x speed.

I realize now that we probably should have been finding people to take a picture of us with Henry too  (LOLOLOL) but I really have been so desperate to get as many photos with Chooch as possible at the risk of making him totally averse to any type of photographical situation for the rest of his life, eschewing family photos with his future family much like my own mother has for her entire adult life.

Taken from lighthousefriends.com: Owls Head Lighthouse is number one on Coastal Living magazine’s most haunted lighthouse list, and there are said to be at least two ghosts at the lighthouse. One is known as the “Little Lady” and is most frequently found in the kitchen or looking out a window. Doors slam, silverware rattles, but people say her presence brings a feeling of peace. The other is thought to be a keeper from beyond the grave.

Of course, we were there on a sunny, blue-sky day in July and nary a spirit was felt. I think in general, lighthouses at night are such a haunting, forlorn presence – ghosts or not!

I saw some old guy standing up here with his good-good camera so then, monkey see monkey do, obviously.

This flag made me mad.

Bitching about me being annoying, I’m sure.

UGH I love nature! I know everyone is like knocking each other out of the way to go to New England in the fall, but the summer!! THE GREENERY!! I loved it. Even though I was/am in such a bad place, I think it was at least a little bit healing for me. The fresh ocean air and sunshine was a lot better than being at home in shitty Brookline, I guess (Although, I missed Penelope terribly and was so concerned about her even though my mom was there because it was the first time leaving her since Drew died.)

Then we went into the gift shop and this is when Chooch gasped at the realization that a LIGHTHOUSE PASSPORT exists and that would have been good to know and a fun family activity (mmm, maybe strike “family”) if we had more time but also I think there are like 50+ lighthouses in Maine so I feel like that would have to be the actual theme of a vacation. Lighthouse Lunacy, or whatever.

I did buy some magnets and a really pretty sea glass pendant that has the Owls Head lighthouse hand painted on it by a local artist (allegedly).

Before heading to Portland, we stopped at a general store so I was able to take a picture of the adjacent, adorable Owls Head post office. Shit, this town was so presh!

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