Jun 252013

[I’m still on vacation so I asked my buddy Alex from Everybody Loves You to help fill the festering void that is my abandoned blog while I’m gone. I’m posting this from my phone in some sketchy hotel outside of Boston, so apologies in advance if the format is all jacked.

I think this post is apropos because my friends Matt and Kristen tried to get Henry to order whiskey at dinner last night and just the thought if him drinking something so manly made me die. Whiskey is the opposite of Faygo, you guys.]

A recommendation of a place I’ve never been to…

I’m a lightweight. I can only handle a maximum of four drinks before I start to get a massive headache and tumultuous tummy. This hardcore hangover then lasts around eighteen hours, the majority of which are spent lying feverishly in bed with the occasional puke-sprint to the toilet. Since my tolerance is so low, I steer clear of pretty much everything but beer. Sure, I may partake in celebrating Cinco de Mayo by chugging a Big Azz Margarita at Mad Mex, but my days of Jagerbombs, Colt 45 forties, Goldschlager shots and Flaming Dr. Peppers are firmly behind me.

Despite my naturally-induced temperance, I really want to try some Wigle Whiskey for two reasons. Firstly, watching six seasons of Mad Men* has convinced me that to be a real man, I need to drink more hard liquor. And when it comes to booze, does it get any more masculine** than saying “I’ll take a whiskey on the rocks”? Nope!

Secondly, Wigle Whiskey has wiggled itself to the top spot on the list of institutions where hip Pittsburghers matriculate. If you don’t frequently tweet superlatives about your visits to Wigle or the other establishments on this esteemed list – Bayardstown Social Club, Harvard & Highland, Fukuda and Espresso a Mano – then you’re just not that cool. I’ve not been to one of those places, but I gave up trying to be cool years ago when I got a Chinese character tattooed on my ankle.

Wigle Whiskey is located in the Strip District and hosts tasting tours Tuesday through Saturday starting at 10am. I recommend waiting till at least noon until you start chugging. Salud!

*There’s just no better way to express masculinity than by coming home late from work, ignoring your family and sitting at the kitchen table while staring into space with a cigarette in one hand and a scotch in the other.

** You want to know what the antithesis of a man’s drink is? I once ordered a Chocotini at Jack’s and my friends still remind me about it. Definitely not my finest moment…

  One Response to “Oh Honestly Alex: A Guest Post”

  1. I got Mr. Beez an aging barrel for Hanukkah last year, and he has prided himself on his aged whiskey (I don’t really think he can rightfully claim any credit, all he did was pour that stuff in a barrel and let it sit). ANYWAY, my favorite drink with Wigle Whiskey is whiskey + lemon shrub (it’s a local mixer, you can get it at the co-op, marty’s market, and other such places where hippies hang out) + club soda. So good. And it’s got that whiskey kick that keeps it from being too girly.
    Whiskey + club soda is pretty darn good too.

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