Here is an intro to tell you that these are the books I read in November. Thank god for intros else you’d never have figured that out.

1. The Last One at the Wedding by Jason Rekulak

LEGIT OBSESSED WITH THIS BOOK. Maybe it was just because I was in a slump, but this was SO ENTERTAINING with a dad protagonist that was borderline surly and just exhausted and his narrative was hilarious even though this was a thriller. A little humor never hurt a thriller, if you ask me. I was rooting for him so hard and kept picturing him as a younger Bruce Willis trying to save his daughter from marrying into a VERY shady family. And then you throw in his sister and her emergency foster kid – golden dialogue. OMG my nose just started to burn because thinking about this book, especially the ending, has the tears threatening to spill.

I thoroughly enjoyed this book so much. I could barely put it down and stayed up way past my bedtime to finish it. MMMM. MMMM MMMM MMMM.

2. Everyone Who Can Forgive Me Is Dead by Jenny Hollander

Eh. I need to get it through my thick skull that dark academia is not for me, even when the academia portion is just via flashbacks. I also found this very hard to follow.

3. Hampton Heights: One Harrowing Night in the Most Haunted Neighborhood in Milwaukee, Wisconsin by Dan Kois

A cute, short read – kind of like Goosebumps for adults. I had higher hopes for this one especially because it was set in 1987 and I love me some radness. Anyway, this follows a bunch of paperboys as they find out that Hampton Heights is overrun by an array of monsters.

4. We Came to Welcome You by Vincent Tirado

What is it with book covers featuring pies?? They always lure me in and then disappoint me. This was such a bland domestic thriller. I could not force myself to care about the main character, her wife, no one. Your basic “new couple in a gated community” thriller, except there were very few thrills.

5. At Home with the Horrors by Sammy Scott

A short story anthology that I actually LOVED. Every story was between 4 to 5 stars, except for the last one which was actually a novella but – IMO – didn’t need to be. It was the only one that dragged on for me. But the rest? Shoooo—I actually really did get some chills out of these pages. It was like being a kid again and reading Christopher Pike, but for adults. “Scared Mary” was my favorite, an urban legend-ish tale for the current generation: being more and more extreme for the views.

Also, this cover! Coincidentally, I had checked this out of the library at the same time as “The Last One at the Wedding” and was so stoked at the similar covers. And then they both gave me great reading experiences, too! Thank you, lakeside book covers!

6. Sandwich by Catherine Newman

OK Ann Patchett, I’m disappointed in you for blurbing this and getting me to listen to the audiobook. I can’t believe how annoying it was. The MOST annoying family. The only character that wasn’t annoying was the cat. Who has these types of explicit yet casual sex conversations with their children? Granted, the kids were young adults but S T I L L – you know when something sexual makes ME uncomfy, then it’s gotta be weird.

Also, I must not have been paying attention because I just realized after the fact that the book is called Sandwich because it’s set in Sandwich, MA. The whole time, I was like, “They haven’t been eating that many sandwiches though, have they?”

Just so boring and whiny. And I too am boring and whiny –  but not like this, I hope.

7. The House That Horror Built by Christina Henry

I had really high hopes for this – a horror novel about a reclusive horror director? Yeah boi. But it was actually so boring, barely held my interest even after I tried switching to the audio. I think Christina Henry is just very hit or miss with me.

8. I’ll Stop the World by Lauren Thoman

OK I didn’t realize this was a time travel book until after I was already PRETTY INTO IT and that’s a good thing because I likely would have skipped it since we know how I roll (or stall) with time travel. But this was so good. Honestly, just very pure, the characters were so real, the 1980s vibes were vibin’ – I really enjoyed it.  4 stars.

9. Rest Stop – Nat Cassidy

Well this was a sick-fuck of a little book! I knew going into that it was going to be pretty violent and gross but it’s NAT CASSIDY and I am his FAN GWORL so I had to read it. 4 stars, a solid novella and made me feel like I had bugs crawling on me quite a few times.

10. Allow Me to Introduce Myself by Onyi Nwabineli

Five stars. The second book I’ve read from this author and she has me sold on her words, people. This book made me feel guilty about how much of Chooch’s life I have put online, but also grateful that I never actually got popular / become an influencer / etc. Because reading a book from the POV of a character who is fighting with her stepmom to take down posts and images of her as a child, and to see the continued trauma she is going through even as an adult was really upsetting and made me feel like an asshole.

My favorite part of this book though is the found family our main character has with her two best friends, and the sweet and pure relationship she has with her grandparents in Nigeria. I loved the parts of the book where she was there visiting and feeling her happiest and safest.

Nwabineli is an excellent writer. The emotion was there but also SO MUCH REALNESS in the dialogue and dynamics within the friend group.

11. Mr. Higgins Comes Home by Mike Mignola

A fun and spoopy little graphic novel that I read just to kill some time. I loved the illustrations!

That’s all for November.

My intro is just “fuck it all to hell.” On to the books.

1. Malice House (Malice Compendium, #1) by Megan Shepherd

A “meh”-ish 3 stars. It was fine.

2. Don’t Eat the Pie by Monique Asher

This cover is chef’s kiss. This and the plot itself gave me some ideas for future Pie Parties lol (Dear Henry, make the top crust of the pie say “All Hail Queen Erin”). But truly, this book was kind of a snooze. I didn’t latch on to a single character. I also didn’t even care about the whys and hows. That’s….not great. Kind of Rosemary’s Baby-esque but not very well executed.

3. Sleep Tight by J.H. Markert

*HIT THE BUZZER!* Next.

4. Incidents Around the House by Josh Malerman

YO 5 STARS. This was included in Spotify Premium and as soon as I started listening, my immediate reaction was, “Ugh, this is narrated from a child’s POV” and thought FOR SURE that the voice would drive me insane. Yet somehow, I withstood it and thank god because this one was actually chilling. The horror book I have been searching for! Perfect for October, creepy AF, also kind of funny at times. My ONLY gripe is that the way  the parents (especially the mom) talked to the kid. I think she was supposed to be 8 and they were slinging some Big Thinks around. I mean, I always patted myself on the back for talking to Chooch like I would talk to anyone else, totally eschewing baby talk, but this was reminiscent of watching Dawson’s Creek back in the day and screaming, “WE DO NOT TALK TO EACH OTHER LIKE THAT!” I thought that was kind of bizarre.

Actually, I just saw this in someone’s Goodreads review and it is very spot-on: “the author wrote the 8 year old like she was 4. meanwhile adults are having full on conversations with her like she is their co worker.”

However, the plot was just THAT GOOD that I didn’t let this drag the score down.

5. Gray After Dark by Noelle W. Ihli

I truly do not know how this absolute garbage disguised as a book has such a high average on Goodreads because it felt like it was written by a middle schooler. Repetitive. Boring. One dimensional characters. I appreciate that it was based on a true story but I think I would rather read a non-fiction account of it. Cringey. Poorly-written. The captors name one of the girls RUTHIE SUE? Get this cornball trash out of my face. Ugh I actually got so angry thinking about this drivel.

6. All This & More by Peng Shepherd

Really cool concept, reimagined Choose Your Own Adventure, but it got kind of boring and also confusing. I didn’t want to choose either option most of the time lol.

7. Horror Movie by Paul Tremblay

This started off strong, but then I got bored. 3 stars but honestly his books are usually pretty mid to me.

8. Docile: Memoirs of a Not-So-Perfect Asian Girl by Hyeseung Song

Loved it! Apparently, a memoir was just what I needed.

9. So Thirsty by Rachel Harrison

OK I am a big fan of Harrison’s writing and have given all of her books 4-5 stars. I love her modern takes on classic horror tropes. AND I LOVE VAMPIRES so this should have been an easy 5 for me. Henry and I listened to the audiobook on the way to Chicago for the Seventeen concert, and finished it on the way home so in that regard this book will always feel cozy and warm to me when I think about it. And Harrison’s writing was, as per usual, snappy and quick-witted. I love how she writes her dialogue and I love how her main characters always have a sort of “ugh what now” attitude about them. This one was no exception. I loved Sloane, but her BFF Naomi was so fucking grating. I get it – she was supposed to be loud and obnoxious, a total party monster but I hated hated hated the voice that the narrator gave her. It went right through me every time, especially since we had to listen to it with the volume up fairly loud to combat highway noise.

I would give the first half of the book 4 stars, maybe even 4.5. It was fun and kept us interested, and the when the vamps finally enter the picture, shit got fucking hysterical. But the second half was a slog. The pacing was weird, it felt like it stalled out. There were times when I couldn’t even remember what the plot was anymore  – was there a thing that they working up to, etc.? So I gave that half a 2.75.

3 stars overall and I will definitely still be reading her books, but you know, you can’t please everyone every time.

10. Diavola by Jennifer Marie Thorne

LOL dude. 4 stars, one of the quirkiest and most fun haunted house books I’ve ever read! I love love love that it was set in a small Italian village, I loved the dysfunctional family dynamics, I loved hating the brother’s brother, I loved rooting for the main character every time her family treated her like a black sheep tag-along.

And then once the hauntings started happening, it was equal parts chilling and STILL FUNNY.

Eventually, the setting changes to NYC and the book lost a little bit of its charm for me then, but overall, 4 stars.

11. Every Last Secret by A.R. Torre

I hated this. One of the most boring domestic thrillers with two catty bitches fighting over one man who, aside from being a mega millionaire, was SUCH A BORING ASSHOLE. This was not good but I was in need of an audiobook to accompany me on my walks and this was the best I could do in a pinch.

12. We Should Have Left Well Enough Alone by Ronald Malfi

Short stories. The first one started the book off with a bang, I loved it so much and this is going to sound like I’m giving myself way more credit than I ever deserve, but it reminded me of those idiotic short stories I used to write on here back in the day before my job and life in general sapped every last ounce of creativity from my brain? Those days?

Yeah anyHOO. Some stories were poppin’, some were….droppin’. You know what I mean. There was one about a foster kid that tags along with a trio of kids from the neighborhood for trick-or-treating and that one was definitely the perfect nostalgic Halloween vibes that I needed, you know, on Halloween. But some were really drawn out with little pay off at the end.

I DON’T KNOW WHAT ELSE YOU WANT ME TO SAY.

That’s all of the books I read in October.

…because I can’t remember. How effing sad is that. I would like to get a brain scan someday. Not like I’d know what I’m looking at but like…are parts of it melted?

1. Grim Root by Bonnie Jo Stufflebeam

Oh this was SO BAD. I definitely remember this because as soon as I saw the cover, my face involuntarily twisted into a scowl of disgust. Basically a Bachelor-type reality show films on location at a haunted house. The writing was so bad, like juvenile fanfic. Caricature-like characters, no one really to root for, cringey dialogue. I get that sometimes books are just meant to be read for fun and not to critique its depth, weight, or social commentary, but this wasn’t even that. 2 stars – being generous there. No jams.

2. The Good House by Tananarive Due

No THIS is how you do the haunted house trope. Due’s writing is rich and immersive. Descriptive but never boring. That’s a gripe I have with horror novels oftentimes – they’re 500+ pages because so much of it is atmosphere-building and let’s be real -that shit can be a snooze after a while. But this wasn’t that. A unique take on magic, family history, and haunted grounds. I was crying by the end of it.

I had to give it a 4 though because it didn’t bowl me over like The Reformatory did – that was a solid 5 and set the bar for Tananarive Due’s books for me from here on out.

3. The Night Guest by Hildur Knútsdóttir

Super quick read – chilling, but TRIGGER WARNING for cat deaths :( This broad is doing some concerning and mysterious things in her sleep – waking up with 40,000 steps on her health tracker, random bruises, blood of unknown origin on her hands. I was down for this.

(Just wish it didn’t have the cat stuff in it.)

4. Mexican Gothic by Silvia Moreno-Garcia

OMG people FREAK OUT over this book but I found it to be boring, not scary, and it had me rolling my eyes quite a few times. Almost all of my Goodreads pals gave this 4 stars. Did we read the same book? It was a low 3 for me and I was considering even dropping it down to 2.5. As a fan of horror, this didn’t even come close to getting the job done for me. Great cover though.

5. The Lake House by Sarah Beth Durst

Was this YA? If so, I don’t think I realized it when I requested it from the library. I thought the cover was compelling and haunting so I was stoked for this! Sadly, it was not what I was expecting. Essentially a deserted island survival tale with three teenage girls who, as expected, were completely annoying on the page. Pretty lame, overall.

6. My Lovely Wife by Samantha Downing

OK!  Here we go, things are heating up! This domestic thriller was SO GOOD. A true page-turner. Exciting. Great writing. I had a ton of fun reading this and isn’t that the whole point of reading!? I lose sight of that a lot lately.

7. Evocation (The Summoner’s Circle, #1) by S.T. Gibson

2 stars, barely. I had heard that this is like the Raven Boys series but for adults and I was really into this at first but it went downhill for me. Not dark enough. Confusing. Cringey. Insufferable characters.  I lost interest and once the big climax happened, I had forgotten what the plot even was lol.  On top of all that, it felt like I had started reading this in the middle of the series – like there was some strained history with some of the characters that was alluded to like it was supposed to have already been pre-known coming into this book. I won’t be continuing this series.

Also, people keep salivating over the cover but I think it’s fugly.

Raven Boys forever. This is not that.

8. The Ocean at the End of the Lane by Neil Gaiman

Admittedly, at a certain point, I no longer knew what was going on but hello, this is Neil Gaiman and it was also narrated by him so it was very cozy and dreamy.

9. The Rich People Have Gone Away by Regina Porter

OK, I’m not usually excited about COVID novel but this one was wild. Enviable writing; captivating, interesting and flawed characters; satisfying moments when you realize whose stories connect. This book was unique and a solid 5 stars from me, Kiki.

10. The Main Character by Jaclyn Goldis 

Wow, this was…how do I say…..um. Far-fetched yet lacking entertainment. I don’t care to say anything else about this.

11. Meddling Kids by Edgar Cantero

3.5. This was really fun and the writing was so quirky. Scooby Doo-meets-The Monster Squad vibes. (Also, that cover is exquisite!!)

12. The Clinic by Cate Quinn

3 stars. I finished this in the car on the way to Long Island for the DREAMIE concert and Henry was like, “What is it about” and I honestly didn’t even care to explain. Um, that is still the case.

13. How to Sell a Haunted House by Grady Hendrix

A GRADY HENDRIX BOOK THAT I ACTUALLY LIKED??? Holy shit. It’s true. This was so close to being a 5 star read for me. I love the sibling dynamics. I actually FELT SCARED a few times which is a really hard feat when it comes to me and horror books because I am such a snob. But also, on top of everything, this was just a FUN TIME. I actually stopped at one point and had to make sure I wasn’t reading a T. Kingfisher book though because that is what this reminded me of – I love her (his? their?) quirky take on family dysfunction-meets-horror.

14. Summer of Night (Seasons of Horror, #1) by Dan Simmons

And then I finished the month with a 5-star horror book written in the early 1990s but set in the 1960s. Very Stephen King-ish, coming-of-age horror about a group of boys that ranged in age from 8 to 12, if I remember correctly, trying to figure out what the FUCK is going on at their now-abandoned school and across the whole town. Disliked the dog deaths. Why do pets have to die in fucking horror books?? It is so unnecessary. But overall, I was really into this book. However, remember what I said earlier in this post about how horror novelists in particular tend to get way too wordy when it comes to setting the scene, building the suspense, knitting the ambiance? Yeah, this one was like that. It would be swathes of text describing the layout of a fucking cornfield, like a book can’t get the HORROR stamp on it unless it pushes 500 pages, so we get a bunch of dry paragraphs that threaten to pull you out of the zone after a point. Or…is that just me? I want dialogue. I’m a talky-type of reader.

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Well, that’s all for September. Hopefully I get some scary reads in this month!?

I have reached the next mood phase of whatever….THIS….is that I have been going through for the last few months / year. And that is extreme irritability and agitation. Literally I’m so pissed off about everything, so mad at everyone, just so annoyed and let down.

And you know what else I’m bad about? Books. I just want to be rocked to my core by a book and that really hasn’t been happening much this year. Is it me, not them? WHO CAN BE SURE.

That being said, here’s the lineup of books from August and if I am remembering correctly, most aren’t even worth mentioning.

1. Foolish: Tales of Assimilation, Determination, and Humiliation by Sarah Cooper

LOL well I lied because right off the bat was this 4-star memoir by Sarah Cooper, whom I LOVE and this was never going to be less than 4 stars for me. Biased. If you don’t know who she is, she is a comedian, writer, and actor who used to work in the tech industry and went viral at the beginning of the pandemic for her HYSTERICAL Trump lip-sync videos on TikTok and Instagram. I fangirled immediately and even though she no longer does the Trump vids, I have no regrets and have never looked back. She is such a character. This kept me rapt and entertained from start to finish.

2. Heaven’s Crooked Finger (Earl Marcus #1) by Hank Early

I think I had one hour left to the audio and I just couldn’t do it. This book was so dry.

3. Best Friends Forever by Jennifer Weiner

Worst Weiner I’ve ever had read. It was a whole lotta WTFs and then we had POV chapters from characters that shouldn’t have been given the stage. Clunky. Not memorable at all.

4. We Were the Universe by Kimberly King Parsons

OK now that I’m getting into this recap, I’m realizing that August wasn’t a write-off (HAHA a pun HAHAHA) after all because this book got me good. 4.5 stars, weird, wacky, uncomfy. The writing was absolutely nuts. Loved it. Kimberly King Parsons, you are on my radar, babe.

5. Go Home, Ricky! by Gene Kwak

Dude, I loved this one too! 5 stars! The only bad thing about this book is that I was reading it to and from Chicago which was such a bipolar, dysfunctional, traumatic trip so I do pair those associations with the reading journey. But not even that can take away from how much I enjoyed this story, the writing, the characters!! This played out so vividly in my head like an irreverent dark comedy series. Make room for Kwak on my radar, Parsons.

6. The Resort by Sara Ochs

I’m taking a pass on this one. It was boring.

7. NCT 127: Limitless by NCT 127

An NCT127 manhwa?? Hell yes. 4 stars because it was kind of like….huh? And I couldn’t tell who was supposed to be who but it’s NCT127 so any NCTzen is going to like it. (The Kpop industry is OBSESSED with dreams as a concept though, I will tell you that much.)

8. I Hope This Finds You Well by Natalie Sue

This was fine but didn’t make me want to Q-Tip my imaginary dickhole over it. I saw this compared to Elenor Oliphant and I would agree because the main character is a bit unlikeable and very socially awkward. Almost the entire book takes place in an office and that felt kind of suffocating at times. I was excited when there was an impromptu trip to a bowling alley at one point.

9. House of Glass by Sarah Pekkanen

Creepy concept featuring a creepy kid but the ending wasn’t as….creepy as I wanted. There was a lot of extraneous detail with side relationships and characters that had no pay off and didn’t add much to the plot in whole so that was frustrating. But overall, I didn’t chuck it across the road when I finished. (Probably because I listened to the audio and had nothing to chuck. My headphone! I could have chucked those. But I didn’t because this didn’t inspire any angry, chuck-inducing tendencies within me.)

10. She Started It by Sian Gilbert

1 star. You’ve read this before. Probably at least a dozen times. Tired ass bully mean girl revenge Agatha Christie trope. It was vapid. All of the characters were cut from the same cardboard. The twist didn’t shock and awe me.

11. Midnight on Beacon Street by Emily Ruth Verona

Most compelling thing about this book is the cover.

So much potential. FAILED. I thought this was going to be fun nostalgic slasher romp but it was fucking stupid and a total waste of time.

12. The Husbands by Holly Gramazio

I had no idea what this was about until I started reading it so when The Thing happens (and it happens in the first chapter) I was like, “Oh. OK!” and I think had I known, I would have skipped because it’s borderline scifi / time fuckery which I try to lean away from but THIS. THIS I liked. It was crazy and fast-paced and also, I felt mildly panicked while reading it too because it was like being in a loop and that is a fear. The loop. Getting stuck. But I enjoyed this, the writing was snappy and funny, and I gave it 4.

13. We Used to Live Here by Marcus Kliewer

Did I understand this? No. Did it give me the creeps? Yep. 4 stars. Read it and then explain it to me please.

It’s billed as Get Out meets Parasite and I didn’t get that vibe at all. Also, I just saw that Netflix picked this up and BLAKE LIVELY is going to be in it. PASS.

14. City of Likes by Jenny Mollen

This was wild. I definitely felt again like I was watching some very messy Girls-esque series on HBO but with young NYC moms and one of them was a legit momfluencer who I couldn’t stop picturing my ex-friend Seri as because this bitch was so full of shit and insufferable and toxic….just like Seri! I did not see The Thing That Happened Near the End coming AT ALL and I actually screamed and then cheered in a really sick, guilty, depraved manner. I gave it 4 stars because it was a fun, pleasurable read. Maybe it wasn’t super memorable, but it was different and a good way to end the month. Also, I had no idea who this writer was until I got to the acknowledgements and it was her and her husband going back and forth (I listened to this on audio) and there was something about it that made me stop and say – wait, who actually are these people? So I looked her up on IG and she is actually an actore I guess? And her husband is Jason Biggs and OMG I’m dying now because I just saw that she was actually on Girls, LOL. That checks.

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The end.

Today’s big news is that I had to walk to the library and pick up the NINE (9!!!!!) books that came in all at once. This never happens! Usually I am waiting forever for a book and end up getting some lame bottom tier audio book to tide me over and all it does is make me angry.

Anyway, I had to make Henry go with me because I needed to use TWO tote bags and I wanted him to pretend like one stack was his but he wouldn’t play along.

I was afraid the librarians would give me stern looks for checking out so many books at once, but then thought, “well, they never acknowledge me so maybe they won’t notice” but for the first time ever, one of them broke the 4th wall and said to us from behind their glass, “hi guys, there’s a free jazz concert going on here if you’re interested” and I FROZE mid-book scan. (I always use self checkout FYI.)

Anyway, he didn’t seem to care and Henry was like “why WOULD they care though, they WANT people to read?!” But I swear some of the librarians there give me bad vibes plus Chooch used to always come home when he was a kid and bitch about them so I just feel very UNDER A SPOTLIGHT when I’m there if you know what I mean. And like they’re just LOOKING for something to scold me for.

Well, here’s my big boi book stack and I am so excited to be a shut-in for the next week or so to tear through these!

(The two on the right are ones I already had checked out, ugh, I’m drowning.)

So, my cat Drew died on July 1 and you can imagine that my reading month was pretty fucked – books I might have liked in another lifetime were a chore to get through, books that were only slightly not great were like a blight on the entire history of literature.

1. We Used To Live Here by Daniel Hurst

I started this book the morning of July 1. Approximately 4 hours later, my cat would be dead. That is all I have to say about this book.

2. I Know You by Annabel Kantaria

I didn’t like this and don’t feel like discussing.

3. Listen for the Lie by Amy Tintera

I think I liked this but now I can’t remember. (Just checked Goodreads – yes, I liked it.)

4. Soul Comfort for Cat Lovers: Coping Wisdom for Heart and Soul After the Loss of a Beloved Feline by Liz Eastwood

My brother Corey sent me this book and while I don’t ever read self-help type books, this was so helpful and comforting. It inspired me to be proactive in the grief process – yes, I have definitely 100% been allowing myself to collapse into a puddle of tears, and this happens at least once a day still, but I’m not sure I would have found the motivation to actively seek out support through my friends, find and attend an actual pet grief support meeting, and most importantly – find myself a therapist. I can tell you that I still feel like absolute shit, but I have to imagine that I would feel even worse if none of these steps were taken.

This book also gave me hope that Drew is here somewhere, or there somewhere, and that I will meet her again (I am choking on grief as I type this – last night and this morning were tough and I thought I felt her getting onto the bed and want to believe that it was really her).

5. The Paradise Problem by Christina Lauren

Christina Lauren romps are usually just what my desiccated heart needs, but this one really fell flat for me. I wanted more paradise, less problems, I guess. I don’t know.

6. The Things We Do to Our Friends by Heather Darwent

I gave this 1 star because it was absolute trash. Shitty writing, shitty characters. BORING. What a waste of a beautiful cover.

7. While We Were Burning by Sara Koffi

Another case of the cover is better than the book.

8. The Southern Book Club’s Guide to Slaying Vampires by Grady Hendrix

I have hated every Grady Hendrix I’ve read, and this was no exception. Such a snooze. Sloppy plot development. TW for animal stuff. Shock value overload. His writing is actually so bad, you guys.

9. The Perfect Marriage by Jeneva Rose

OK finally a book I enjoyed. I picked this up after reading the author’s most recent release, as this is the one that put her name on the map I guess. Plus, Megan had already read it and loved it and it’s about to be turned into a movie I think? It was twisty and provided the escape that I was desperately seeking (Susan).

Also, I started following Jeneva on Instagram and she is effortlessly hilarious which makes me appreciate her books that much more.

10. Every Last Fear by Alex Finlay

I haven’t liked any of this guy’s books I’ve previously read, but this one surprised me. A compelling family mystery / thriller that actually didn’t make me cringe or roll my eyes. My book reviews are good.

11. Bad Men by Julie Mae Cohen

Witty, dark, and entertaining! The body count wasn’t as high as I would have liked, but I really enjoyed the murderess. A tad predictable but it was still a fun read, one that I would have probably enjoyed a whole lot more if life wasn’t so wrecked currently.

I meant to post this on Sunday but seeing as how I cried 3/4 of the day like my face is a fucking salt water sprinkler, that didn’t happen. Today marks 2 weeks. Nothing is helping.

Well. Here are the books I read in June which feels like an eternity ago at this point and who the fuck even cares really – I know I sure don’t.

1. The Band by Christine Ma-Kellams

I almost DNFd this. If you don’t like Kpop or are at least mildly interested in Korean culture, I can’t imagine this book would be very appealing. It’s VERY CLINICALLY/ACADEMICALLY written at times and even though it was rife with dry humor and wit, it was still almost too dry. I did end up really enjoying it though once I reached the pivotal moment where the book’s narrator (I believe she was meant to be based on the writer herself), runs into the canceled member of a Kpop boy group in a California H-Mart. From there, the book really picks up, there is way more dialogue and less gigantor blocks of text full of long-ass sentences with that dreaded “assigned reading” feel.

It was extremely smartly written which made a lot of sense when I read the author’s bio at the end. (Harvard-trained cultural psychologist / college professor lol. That checks.)

2. Mother-Daughter Murder Night by Nina Simon

It was fine but forgettable.

3. With or Without You by Caroline Leavitt

Barely remember reading this. I think I was in between library books and grabbed this on Everand. It was quick and OK. I wasn’t invested in any of the characters so didn’t care one way or another if the wife came out of the coma, which is what the whole book is about.

4. No One Can Know by Kate Alice Marshall

Shit, I have really loved some of her books but this was not one. I gave it 2 stars. I was bored. My Goodreads review just says “What even was this mess.”

5. Stay True by Hua Hsu

Memoir of a New Yorker staff writer that focuses mostly on his childhood best friend and a traumatic event surrounding that. I hadn’t really read the synopsis going in to this so I was expecting the thing to happen and it hit me hard. Wow, just like real life.

6. Between Us by Mhairi McFarlane

My second McFarlane book – loved it. Not a 5-star like “Just Last Night” was for me, but a solid 4. She writes such vivid, animated characters, and the conversations between them feels so real and natural. I wasn’t sure what direction this book was heading during the first third, but then it really picked up and I was into it.

7. My Darling Girl by Jennifer McMahon

Elderly mom who might be either be possessed or just a really shitty mom, etc. It was mildly entertaining but I will say the twist at the end got me.

8. The Vacancy in Room 10 by Seraphina Nova Glass

Two POVs and I kept mixing them up. I didn’t like this very much. Everything feels so predictable and generic to me anymore. Should I stop reading? I’m bored.

9. Home Is Where the Bodies Are by Jeneva Rose

This one was actually pretty good. Neighbor kid goes missing in the 90s. Dad of main characters’ family goes missing many years later. Present day – mom dies which brings all three siblings back to the family house and reopens the mystery of the missing kid and also where the hell is dad. I actually didn’t see the reveal coming and was pleasantly surprised. An entertaining thriller was just what I needed at the time. Seems so long ago now.

10. What If You & Me (Say Everything, #2) by Roni Loren

LOL I was halfway through this before I realized it was #2 in a series. Pretty stupid romance. I won’t be going back to read #1.

11. Middle of the Night by Riley Sager

I mean, at this point in my life, it’s tradition to read a new Riley Sager book in the summer. I am so LOVE/HATE with this guy’s books. I have read 1 stars from here where I actually have thrown the book across the room when I finished, and I have read 5 stars that I still think about sometimes! This one was…I think I gave it a 4 on Goodreads but I would say more honestly that it was a 3.5. It had a Goosebumps-For-Grownups feel to it. Another “missing neighborhood kid from the 90s” tale where I did NOT in any way predict the ending. It was a good summer mystery/thriller and I liked the dual timelines.

Also, his book covers have been SO GOOD lately.

12. Good in Bed (Cannie Shapiro, #1) by Jennifer Weiner

Meh. I generally enjoy Jennifer Weiner books and associate her with my first month of “getting back into regular reading” at the beginning of 2020 because her newest novel at the time was the first one I checked out of the library and I devoured it. But most of her books are kind of “more of the same.” This was is an older book of hers and it was fine. All of her main characters are plus-sized and the way she describes them, I picture every single one as Carnie Wilson but then at some point in this book, someone compares the main broad to Janine Garofalo and I’m like, “Babe….what.” So, that can sometimes get in the way of the story.

13. The Weekend Retreat by Tara Laskowski

This was so dumb. A bunch of rich fucking boring assholes who I kept mixing up. I wish I had not read this and just spent that extra time with Drew instead. Fuck this book. Fuck everything.

1. She’s Not Sorry – Mary Kubica

Love me a domestic thriller. This was almost a 4. I genuinely did enjoy it but the plot kind of went haywire at a certain point, almost like she had ideas for two books and then decided to smash it together into one. The one storyline was VERY predictable, not connected, and completely unnecessary. But the twist in the main plot was A GOODIE.

2. Funny Story – Emily Henry

OK, if this has been the first Emily Henry book I had ever read, then 5 stars, easy. But, Happy Place is the gold standard, as far as I’m concerned, and this just didn’t quite reach that level. So, solid 4 stars it is. Emily Henry writes the best side characters – every single one has a purpose, an intention, dialogue unique to their personality. I know I have said this before, but once upon a time, I went to college for English writing and this is the snappy, whippy, smart and sardonic dialogue that I used to strive for. You know, back when I “wrote.” Sigh. Emily Henry’s books are such a fun summertime escape for me and I really think that the only thing that would make them better would be if I was reading it poolside. In Wildwood, maybe. Nothing too fancy.

3. Nigh Watching – Tracy Sierra

Remember what I was just saying about Emily Henry’s knack for realistic, smart dialogue? This book ain’t that. It was FINE but also, what. Just a whole lotta gaslighting and WTF is happening now. It starts immediately with a home invasion and I was worried that the entire book was going to be married to this one event – the man searching the house, the mom and two kids hiding in the panic room. But, it does move on to other settings, and there are also flashback chapters.

This might be one of those times where the audiobook ruined the book for me. Narrator’s natural voice was fine but when she started doing other voices it was just annoying. There’s an entire chapter where the main lady’s voice is raspy and SHE DID THIS AWFUL VOCAL FRY-esque thing which was like the nails of influencers circa 2015 on a chalkboard.

Actually the book itself was pretty mid regardless.

4.  The Vacation House – Jane Shemilt

Yooooo. I picked this up on a whim from the library and almost DNF’d it because of a slow start. But man, this caught me off guard how much I loved it. A book about rapists getting their comeuppance. We love to read it.

Really frustrating to see how the victim’s family was completely torn apart while the perps went on to live their best lives, which is so often the case.

5.  Worry – Alexandra Tanner

I mean, one of the characters is a rescue dog named Amy Klobuchar, so that should clue you in to the irreverence that is Alexandra Tanner’s writing. Simultaneously made me glad that I’m not in my 20s living in NYC with a younger sister and also sad that I’m not in my 20s living in NYC with a younger sister. The trials and tribs! A multitude of LOL moments. Loved it. Would watch it if it became a TV show.

6.  Expiration Dates – Rebecca Serle

3.5 – this was a fun concept and quick read! This broad gets a magical slip of paper every time she meets a man that tells her how long the relationship will last, until she meets one where no expiration is given. I enjoyed this more than I imagined – thought it would just be a sappy romp, and I mean – that it was – but it also kind of hit.

7. Rebecca, Not Becky – Christine Platt and Catherine Wigginton Greene

I would have liked this better if I hadn’t listened to the audiobook, I think. This was interesting in that it was written jointly by a Black author and a white author, and centers around a Black female protagonist, and a white female protagonist who is on a constant  mission to prove that she is woke, and while she has all good intentions, it does tend to come off as performative – especially in the eyes of the Black character, whose family has just moved into a wealthy predominately white neighborhood. Lots of thought-provoking discussions on race and prejudice, and many uncomfortable moments as we watch Rebecca Not Becky go above and beyond to make a token Black friend.

But yeah, the audio narration was grating.

8. I Did It For You – Amy Engel

Holy shit, this one was a HOT MESS. 2 stars. Skip it. The “big reveal” was actually so fucking laughable.

Not to shame the Young Adult genre, but I actually had to to doublecheck Goodreads to see if this was YA because it felt like it was written for pre-teens. Nope. This burning sack of dog shit was meant for adult eyeballs.

9. Real Americans – Rachel Khong

Easy 5 stars. Solid. Will live in my head for years to come. I love a multi-generational immigrant saga. My favorite section was the first one though, following Lily, a Chinese American struggling to find her professional footing during Y2K times.

I read “Goodbye Vitamin” by Khong several years ago and that was also a 5-star. I have been waiting for this book since then and it was worth it. She is a phenomenal writer. Also? There is a touch of magical realism in this, as a bonus. Please read this.

(Holy shit, I just started to involuntarily sob as I thought about one of the final chapters, LOL, is the heat getting to me or is it just me being like OH HI I HAVE A HEART.)

10. They Call Us Enemy – George Takei

A graphic novel written by George Takei of Star Trek fame about his childhood days growing up in concentration camps in America during WWII. I cried so much reading this.

11. I Thought You Said This Would Work – Ann Garvin

Two old college friends (grudgingly) reunite on a roadtrip to get back their friend’s dog who was turned over to a shelter by her ex-husband. Oh, and the friend is in the hospital battling her second round of cancer. Aside from the cancer, this was a very silly romp of a book, lots of capers, lots of madcap action, lots of quirky characters picked up along the way. I rolled my eyes a lot but somehow, by the end of the book, I was like JESUS CHRIST and bawled my eyes out. All that silliness did nothing to prepare me, that’s for sure.

12. When Among Crows – Veronica Roth

An interesting Slavic fantasy, very quick read, and very obviously the beginning of a series. I did enjoy it but is 3 stars enough to continue on to the next book? I dunno. I think this might be a case where the audiobook could have enhanced my experience because I read that it’s a full cast, but I didn’t want to wait for it so I just read the physical version. Wow cool story Erin.

13. Hello Girls – Brittany Cavallaro and Emily Henry

A YA Thelma and Louise-ish? It was OK.

OK, I’m out. I got the new Riley Sager from the library today and I am excited to see if I love it or hate it, there’s never an in-between when it comes to me and Sager.

April was a blur and I barely remember reading any of these, but here are some books:

1. Wild Things by Laura Kay

Aw, I read this while in Korea. :( In hotel rooms, on trains, and on the plane – this was a pretty solid book to read while traveling. Not too terribly heavy, some good laughs, and a lot of collective “aw”s from the studio audience. A friend group move out to the country, buy a house together, raise chickens, and just kind of reset their lives. It made me want to flip my life on its head in a way, as well! Just…do something different. However! I wasn’t much of a fan of the protagonist. The other characters in the friend group were great but this broad was frustrating at times and didn’t have much of a personality.

Overall though, it was fun.

2. The Pachinko Parlour by Elisa Shua Dusapin

Apparently, I liked this because I gave it 4 stars but I don’t remember any of it, just that it was a very quick read.

3. The Hating Game by Sally Thorne

Dude, everybody in Book Land has read this book, it feels like. I have been hearing about it for years. I’m not a huge romance reader, but out of curiosity – and because the audiobook was available – I gave it a whirl. And OK, OK, I get it. The writing was pretty damn good, the characters were well fleshed out. It was like reading an edgy cable sitcom. I really enjoyed the banter between the two work nemeses for sure but also – that this kind of behavior was going on in an office was pretty unbelievable.

4. Normal People by Sally Rooney

Another famous book on booktube. I. Fucking. Hated. This. I hated both main characters. I hated the writing. I hated it all. It was boring, insipid, and I did not give a shit AT ALL about these two idiots – Marianne especially. I kept hoping she was going to die.

5. Spoiled Brats: Stories by Simon Rich

OK, I’m not generally into short story collections but this one was funny. The only story I didn’t like was the very first one because *animal stuff* but the rest were right up my alley (that is to say: idiotic). My favorite was “Sell Out” – I wanted more! Then I found out it had been made into a movie (An American Pickle) starring Seth Rogen and now I need to watch it.

6. I Who Have Never Known Men by Jacqueline Harpman

Three stars because the writing was fine but for me in particular, this story was not something I enjoyed. I mean, it’s about a bunch of women locked in a bunker who one day escape only to find that there is nothing left of the world. Is this really something meant to be enjoyed? I felt awful and uncomfortable – and hopeless – through the whole thing, and I guess that’s the point. My Goodreads review was a simple and succinct: “Bleak.”

7. The Day Tripper by James Goodhand

Ugh I forgot about this one. When will I get it through my thick head I just don’t like time travel. And I just didn’t like this book.

8. Weyward by Emilia Hart

First of all, can we take a moment to admire this exquisite book cover?

It’s the best part of the book.

I mean, the story itself was fine, but s l o w. There are three timelines and we’re following a different-but-related woman in each. I didn’t really prefer one over the other – each storyline had its merits and sluggy-sections. But I will say, the end was satisfying.

9. End of Story by A.J. Finn

Ugh. Not worth writing about. So hokey. 2 stars. Five stars for the author photo though, cute dog!

P.S. The audiobook was so fucking obnoxious.

10. Hello Beautiful by Ann Napolitano

4 stars. Sad, funny, cozy. Made me wish I grew up with a gaggle of sisters close to my age.

11. The Other Mothers by Katherine Faulkner

Three stars. Just a mid domestic thriller.

12. The Vacationers by Emma Straub

Not ground-breaking or even that memorable, but it was fun, chaotic, dysfunctional. Great characters. I want to go to Mallorca now. I will read more from Emma Straub. (Her dad – RIP – is my favorite horror writer!)

13. First Lie Wins by Ashley Elston

OK so a lot of this played out like some lame thriller TV show that Henry would be into but the end was SO GOOD. The last line especially. Love a good last line.

***

That’s all the page-flippin’ I did in April.

1. The House of Last Resort by Christopher Golden

A religious-y haunted house / possession book set in some fictional town in Sicily? God this should have been spectacular. The cover is, at least. It just never really WENT THERE. So much meandering. Then I realized this author also wrote All Hallows, which I hated, but I will say that this one at least read less like a YA horror script to be workshopped in a high school creative writing class. The only scene that really got me didn’t even take place in the house!!

3 stars. Not the worst. I guess.

2. Happiness Falls by Angie Kim

Angie Kim went to Stanford and Harvard and it shows in her writing. Not that it’s pretentious or highfalutin, but just SO SMART. The most unique “missing person” novel I’ve ever read. It’s fucking depressing but there were also some parts where I laughed out loud,  genuinely. Mia is a frustrating protagonist, unlikable the majority of the time, but also fascinating and being in her mind is incredible (and exhausting. and confusing.).

4 stars.

3. The Sweetest Remedy by Jane Igharo

Connecting with new family. A romance. Nigeria. I kind of wanted more, especially the Nigeria parts because I wanted to feel like I was there, and I didn’t. It was fine! 3 stars.

4. Reykjavík: A Crime Story by Ragnar Jónasson

An Icelandic thriller. It was OK but at some point, I stopped caring about what happened to some teenager in 1956, you know? March was a bad month for me to care about books, I think.  3 stars.

5. Rabbit Cake by Annie Hartnett

There is so much casual animal death in this book and the plot is beyond ridiculous but not in a “fun romp” kind of way. I think I actually hated this. 2 stars.

6. The Heiress by Rachel Hawkins

Rachel Hawkins is hit or miss with me. This was a miss. I didn’t give a shit about a single person in this book. The intrigue wasn’t there for me.  The cover is pretty though. 3 stars because it didn’t suck, maybe it was just me.

7. Really Good, Actually by Monica Heisey

Really FUCKING good, actually. I gave this a 4 on Goodreads, but dude. Let’s be real – this was a 5. The main character was such a hot mess, relatable, root-for-able. I cried for her. I laughed with her. I laughed AT her. I cringed at her. The writing was vibrant, real, snappy, hilarious. When I found out that the author is an essayist, comedian, AND screenwriter, it made a lot of sense. This was my style.

I’m just sorry that I put off reading it for as long as I did – it was on my Scribd (Everand?) shelves for a good while.

8. Giovanni’s Room by James Baldwin

4 stars but possibly because I felt obligated? I think to my taste, it really was more of a 3 but I can certainly understand why this book (and author) is so very beloved. And BLEAK.

9. The Girls in the Garden by Lisa Jewell

Another hit-or-miss author for me. This one was kind of a snooze. 5 star cover, 3 star story. Lisa’s writing itself is always nice, but her plots sometimes are just like WTF Lisa, come on.

10. Knock Knock, Open Wide by Neil Sharpson

2 stars. Fucking waste of time. Why is that every time I bring a book to Korea, it ends up being so terrible!? This was a joke of a horror book. I rolled my eyes through the whole thing. Way too long. No pay off. Dumb characters. If it wasn’t a library book, I’d have tossed it in the Han River JUST KIDDING I WOULD NEVER LITTER IN KOREA!!!!!!

*******

And that’s all of the mostly shitty books I read in March. We’re almost done with April here and I am still in a slump. I am craving a five star read. :( Maybe the new Emily Henry!?!?

Oh boy more books.

——————————————

1. Berlin by Bea Setton

3 stars. This lady was insufferable, maybe even more so than me. Still, I didn’t hate this. Parts of it read like a series of REALLY WELL-WRITTEN LiveJournal posts from the early 00s. Really well-written, but also wildly solipsistic and self-aggrandizing. So yeah, LJ posts but make them literary, I guess.

2. Come and Get It by Kiley Reid

3.5 – for most of the book, I wasn’t bored but I was constantly questioning wtf it was about so it was tough to get really immerse myself in the story. Then The Something happens about 3/4 of the way through and it’s…hilarious but also traumatic and then everything just falls like dominoes. Lots and lots of cringe and secondhand embarrassment.

I still question wtf this was even about, but it was entertaining and I loved Millie. And Collette.

3. Dark Corners (Rachel Krall, #2) by Megan Goldin

4 stars, made me want to go back to Florida since I was reading this during the dreadful month of February. A good, fast-paced thriller. Etc etc etc. This is #2 in a series and while I did read #1, I didn’t feel like it was the necessary to have read it.

4. People to Follow by Olivia Worley

And Then Were None but make it YA with a cast of pretentious YouTubers. By the time the killer was revealed, I wasn’t interested anymore nor did the motive even make sense to me. Also, I get that these were vapid 20-something social media darlings who were constantly distracted by their own refection, but the reactions to discovering each dead body was kind of….underwhelming? Eh, I’m sure this was a lot more fun for its intended audience.

5. Tom Lake by Ann Patchett

5 stars, but maybe 4.5 since I didn’t love this AS MUCH as The Dutch House. It took me about 1/4 of the way in to really get into it, but once I did, it became such a cozy read for me. I was jealous of the family dynamic – stories of close-knit families always sucker-punch me because I don’t have that with my family (I mean, my parents and siblings) and what I wouldn’t have given to be able to spend the early parts of Covid on my family’s cherry farm, listening to my mom tell us the story of her golden years, pre-marriage. This book doesn’t have a hard-driving plot, but it’s full of interesting characters, love, and family. I don’t know what else to say other than it resonated with me and I was hooked. And then I walked it back to the library while doing the “I’ve Just Been Crying” body shudder. Oh, and it’s narrated by Merril Streep! And she of course did a fantastic job except that she used a concerning “Tommy Pickles”-esque voice for one of the (adult!!) daughters and that was kind of annoying.

6. Y/N by Esther Yi

This way too literary for me. I was looking for a fun romp into the psyche of a delulu Kpop sasaeng but this was way too fever dreamy for me. I did not have a good time reading this.

7. That’s Not My Name by Megan Lally

4 stars – A great example of a YA thriller being better than a lot of adult thrillers. I couldn’t put this down! Dark, twisty, pulse-pumping. I LOVED the chapters where the boyfriend of the missing teen girl was doing his own damn detective work with two friends – it gave Teen Wolf (the series) vibes. The camaraderie was realistic, the dialogue was believable. It was entertaining without making the book corny.

8. Welcome to the Hyunam-Dong Bookshop by Hwang Bo-reum

4 stars – probably won’t be everyone’s cup of tea but I just really love Korean novels and this one played out like a slow, cozy slice-of-life K-Drama in my mind. I loved the natural progression of relationships between the bookstore owner, her barista, and her regular customers. This one moves slow, there is no real “climax,” it’s just….about life. And it’s precious. And thought-provoking.

9. The Quiet Tenant by Clémence Michallon

UGH THIS ONE HAD ME SCREAMING!! The Goodreads blurb says it best: A pulse-pounding psychological thriller about a serial killer narrated by those closest to him: His 13-year-old daughter, his girlfriend—and the one victim he has spared.

4 stars!

10. Whale by Cheon Myeong-Kwan

Yoooo. 5 stars. This book was sick. A wild ride. A fantastic saga. Trigger warnings galore. Brutal yet wickedly funny. Also? Probably not for everyone.

11. Penance by Eliza Clark

I was really into this and then..the end happened. This knocked it down to more of a 3.5 for me because I felt like it wasn’t necessary. Sometimes you don’t need a twist and it felt like it was tacked on because a certain word count needed to be met, I don’t know. It was jarring.

Anyway, pretty chilling but please look up content / trigger warnings. I can handle a lot but this one got very detailed w/r/t a school shooting and it was hard to read, being, you know, American and all.

12. My Roommate Is a Vampire by Jenna Levine

Eh. It was fine.

13. The Wonder State by Sara Flannery Murphy

4 stars for the plot, fucking weird man. I was into it. Maybe more of a 3 for the actual writing though. I felt like it could have been executed a bit better, especially the dialogue. There were some scenes where the conversation felt very rigid and unnatural.

14. The Reformatory by Tananarive Due

Solid 5 stars are you kidding me. This entire book is a masterpiece but the last several chapters had me holding my breath and shaking. Unforgettable, frustrating, beautifully written, devastating, characters as clear as day. I can’t recommend this book enough but be forewarned: it is BRUTAL. One of the best ghost stories I have ever read and will undoubtedly never forget.

I mean for Christ’s sake, it has a 4.52 average out of 8,151 ratings on Goodreads. The hype is real. This book deserves all the accolades it gets.

Can’t remember what I called the first half, but here are the next 10 books!

11. The Woman in the Library by Sulari Gentill

Three stars. This was entertaining but had just a bit too much going on. I thought it was interesting that it was a book-within-a-book but it also kind of made it clunky.

12. Night’s Edge (Night’s Edge, #1) by Liz Kerin

Three stars. A unique take on the vampire trope. Apparently, this is #1 in the series. Not sure if I was enrapt enough to continue.

13. The Naturals (The Naturals, #1) by Jennifer Lynn Barnes

A really fun YA Criminal Minds-esque romp. Also, ANOTHER series but I’m not sure if I will continue. This was meant to be a palate cleanser so that I didn’t fall into a reading slump.

14. Paris: The Memoir by Paris Hilton

Five stars. Fuck yeah, Paris. This was waaaay deeper than I expected it to be. I know it might seem like a lie, but I have always admired Paris Hilton and it was horrifying to read her firsthand accounts of the horrific abuse she experienced at the shitty “schools” she was sent to during her teen years. She endured a lot. It’s proof that sometimes being rich and famous isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. I’m glad that she was able to not hold this against her parents but I honestly don’t think I would have been able to be so forgiving if this happened to me.

15. Finlay Donovan Jumps the Gun (Finlay Donovan, #3) by Elle Cosimano

First book was fantastic, second was eh, this was a slog to get through. The novelty has long since worn off, it’s not cute or interesting anymore, same-old, will not be continuing on with this series.

16. Life Ceremony by Sayaka Murata

Not usually a fan of short stories but I loved the other books I’ve read by Sayaka Murata so I took the plunge and so glad I did. The standouts for me were the title story, A First-Rate Material, and Lover on the Breeze which anthropomorphizes a curtain in a girl’s room (this one made me cry??? lol). I will read anything she writes.

My favorite review is from the author of the Heartstopper series, Alice Oseman: “Sayaka Murata says fuck societal norms! Start a family with your platonic best friend! Eat weeds you find in the city park! Make human stews to honour the dead! Have sex with a curtain!”

17. The Companion by E.E. Ottoman

Quick and boring read about a polyamorous, queer romance in 1948. I’m not its target audience so I hesitate to give it a more thorough review or a star rating, because really, it wasn’t for me! Writing wasn’t bad but what even was the plot?

18. Only If You’re Lucky by Stacy Willingham

2 stars. This was so bad. Boring, poorly-written, mistook it for YA – it’s not, and not a knock against YA but it just felt like this was written for high school girls. We are constantly reminded that LUCY IS JUST LIKE ELIZA, WHO IS DEAD IN CASE YOU FORGOT. WE DON’T KNOW HOW OR WHY YET BUT WE WILL EVENTUALLY FIND OUT AND WHEN WE DO, WE WILL ROLL OUR EYES. It was actually insulting how repetitive this one. It reminded me of the most recent Harlan Coben series on Netflix where we get FLASKBACKS anytime someone mentions something that happened several scenes ago. So fucking corny and cheesy, JUST LIKE THIS BOOK.

I have a lot of anger, clearly.

19. Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing by Matthew Perry

FML. I miss you, Matthew Perry. Everything about this is heartbreaking and yet still made me LOL numerous times. The amount of pain and suffering this man lived with. It is so depressing.  I do wish that it had been edited better. As a cultural icon, his story was an important one to tell and deserved a better editor.

20. Search History by Amy Taylor

A weird ending to a weird reading month. Three stars. Woman moves to a new city across Australia after her boyfriend breaks up with her, starts dating a new guy, finds out his ex-gf has died and becomes obsessed with scrolling through her Instagram, going as far as taking a class at the yoga studio where she taught and getting her hair done by her brother. Uncomfortable. Three stars.

***

THE END.

I don’t know what happened in January but I blasted through a shit-ton of books. TWENTY to be exact! To be fair, one was a children’s book, but all the others were normal-length books. I was just on a roll, had some downtime, and the library was really coming through with a bunch of books that I had requested.

Here is the first half!

1. Peaces by Helen Oyeyemi

My third Oyeyemi! I am going to be honest here, her books are a struggle for me to read because they are literary fiction for true academics. I am not an academic. But I appreciate Oyeyemi’s vocabulary, writing style, character creation, and world building. This book takes place almost exclusively on a magical train and centers around two guys on something of a honeymoon. I’m not sure that I fully understand any of her books, but I feel a certain way while reading them and I like it.

There. That’s my review.

2. What Red Was by Rosie Price

I believe I picked this book on a whim at the library, and I obviously liked it enough to rate it a 3.5. It wasn’t boring, it held my attention, it wasn’t poorly written. BUT I was a little confused about how the main character is raped by a relative of her best friend and it felt like we focused less on the main character and more on the family of the best friend.

And then there’s this strange scene where clues related to the rape and the rapist are displayed in a very public way, which at first I was like, “OH FUCK YEAH” but then remembered that the main character had not actually consented to THIS either. So, it just left me thinking about that for a while, how I would feel, etc.

Oh, my other gripe is that I believe we’re supposed to think that the best friend’s family is like, super interesting and well-to-do, Kennedys-esque maybe, but I just felt like they were whatever, nothing special, unremarkable.

3. Oksana, Behave! by Maria Kuznetsova

Oh, I really enjoyed this! Another one that I grabbed straight from the fiction shelf at the library, this one was based on that cutie cover, haha. This book follows the life of Oksana through a series of quirky and often poignant vignettes, starting with her move to Florida from the Ukraine as a young girl (7 I think?) with her parents and grandmother. The grandmother was the best part, IMO. Total spitfire!

4. Landline by Rainbow Rowell

Three stars. A failing marriage and magical landline to the 90’s. Sounds better than it was. I could have done without all the “talking to my two small daughters on the phone” moments. It got under my skin in a big way.

5. Several People Are Typing by Calvin Kasulke

Working from home and communicating with coworkers via Jabber all day, the concept of this book was appealing to me. But then the Slack messaging format just got reallllly old. There’s a quirky sci-fi element in that one of the coworkers gets stuck *inside* Slack somehow but no one believes him, and then a very unexpected romance develops.

I think this would have worked better for me if the blocks of messages were broken up but chapters of actual narrative too. Give us SOME non-Slack content. Character backstories. I DON’T KNOW, SOMETHING, ANYTHING!

6. I’ll Take You There by Wally Lamb

I thought that I had read something by Wally Lamb before but I guess not. This might not have been the best to start with, but I found the plot interesting – 60-year-old Felix gets visited by a ghost at the movie theater where he holds a movie night for the classics, is visited by the ghost of some silent film-era director and then replays some scenes from his past on the screen.

Through these visits and personalized films, he’s able to understand more of what his sisters went through back in the 50s as girls, and then later, as women. So, it’s interesting. It didn’t make me cry though so do with that what you will.

7. The Last Word by Taylor Adams

Dude. I didn’t like No Exit much at all—it felt like it was Christopher Pike book for junior high kids and not knocking that because I LOVED CHRISTOPHER PIKE BOOKS when I was in elementary school, but you know…I wanted a more mature book at the mo’. So it’s actually kind of nuts that I picked this one up but I’m glad I did because I really enjoyed it! Was the main character annoying? No. Did I feel tense? Yes. Do any pets die? NO.

This was a good, solid thriller. 4 stars. I even recommended it to Henry.

8. Natural Beauty by Ling Ling Huang

OK Ling Ling Huang. Thanks for making me legit gag numerous times with the body horror. Jesus. I really enjoyed this horror-twist on the beauty industry and beauty standards, what people will pay to cheat ageing and genetics, as well as the lengths corporations will go to profit from human vanity. Well-written, the visuals it gave me will haunt me for years.

9. The Skull by Jon Klassen

The aforementioned kid’s book. But to be fair, I used to read Chooch books illustrated by Jon Klassen but this was one was also written by him, it’s his retelling of a traditional Tyrolean folktale. Look at that cover!

10. Idol, Burning by Rin Usami

Just swap out Jpop with Kpop, introduce me to the stanning lifestyle when I’m 16, and I could have been the main character in this book. I think that’s all you need to know about this one, lol. I really enjoyed it.

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So, there you have the first round of books I read in January.