Joy found two old Jesus and Mary portraits at her grandfather’s house and, knowing my gravitation toward things of a religious icon nature, brought them into work for me.
While I was admiring them, Debby came over to my desk and started telling me a story about her great-grandma’s house and how it had a legit parlor room where people were laid out.
“So now I have a big box in my attic full of pictures of dead people,” she finished.
HOLD UP WAIT A SECOND.
“You mean like this,” I asked, pulling open my desk drawer and extracting a photo of some dead dude.
(Yes, I keep post-mortem photos in my desk. Helps motivate me.)
“Um…yeah actually. Just like that,” Debby stammered, clearly not expecting me to have that.
She said she doesn’t want them, but doesn’t like throwing away pictures of people. So now I’m trying to get her to give me the box.
God, I can’t believe she’s known me since May and waited THIS LONG to tell me her dark secret.
***
In other work happenings, the thrill of collecting Glenns hasn’t yet fizzled like I thought it would. In fact, Chooch has jumped on the bandwagon and wants to make Glenns all the time at home now.
Chooch is still really into Japanese horror, so he made a Ju-On Glenn, which absolutely no one will figure out on their own. He was in the middle of making one Saturday night, but it was time to leave for a haunted hayride.
“But I’m not done with my Strawberry Shortcake Glenn!” he wailed, which is totally weird because the other day I was going to make a Strawberry Shortcake Glenn but got distracted. WHAT ARE THE ODDS.
Amish, DJ Lance, Harry Potter Glenn.
Literally only 2 people have recognized this as Robert Smith Glenn. God, get with it, Law Firm.
Jesus, Phantom of the Opera, Native American, Bieber Glenn.
“I don’t think you should do a Jesus Glenn,” Barb said at the exact moment I dropped the vending capsule containing Jesus Glenn into the clown head. I guess because Sue vetoed Barb’s desire to do an Hasidic Jew Glenn. But it was too late, Jesus Glenn was already inside the clown head, lost amonst the other plastic balls. “Well, maybe just tell whoever gets it to not hang it up,” she advised.
But George, who gets all the good Glenns, got Jesus Glenn and it went right up on the wall. I pointed it out to Barb today and she mumbled, “Yeah, I saw.” Clearly, she’s harboring a little resentment!
Juice Head Glenn and Pinocchio Glenn!
Little Red Riding Hood (Brad’s suggestion) and Jack-in-the-Box Glenn. Even with the “Yay grandma!”, some people are still having a hard time figuring out Little Red Riding Glenn. :(
Today, Chris got Kato Kaelin Glenn (basically looks like a broad in a blazer but it amused me immensely to draw it) but refuses to put it on the wall with the other Glenns because he wants them all for himself. When Jamie found this out, she marched into his office and schooled him.
“At least put the Kato Kaelin Glenn on the wall!” I pleaded when Chris walked by a few minutes later.
“Kato Kaelin Glenn…do I have that one?”
Barb gave him a weird look. “Um, you JUST got that one like five minutes ago,” she said.
He doesn’t even know which Glenns he has! What a Glenn-collecting poser!
He’s still hoarding them though.
Otherwise, my life goes like this: haunted houses, haunted houses, haunted trails, haunted hayrides, haunted hayrides, haunted houses, pie party.
I have a tough life.
