This was given to me yesterday because I’m now known at work as the girl who likes weird carrots. I’m cool with that.
Jonny Craig is on the cover of the latest Alternative Press! When I was screaming about it at work, Carey asked, “Is this a magazine you made up?” because she hates Jonny and hates me too!
Anyway, my subscriber copy finally arrived yesterday WHILE I WAS ALREADY AT WORK so Henry texted me a picture of it and then proceeded to make idle threats.
Came home from work to a gingeriffic photo spread of Jonny AND a joint package from Andrea and Chuck. They sent me one of Chuck’s Killer Klown masterpieces! I almost died. Chuck is famous in the Halloween industry for his amazing masks and horror props, and when he asked me to write descriptions for his two new products, I was so honored!
Chooch painted Jonny for me. I have relinquished all my blank canvases and jumbled box of paint to him, for he is the new Somnambulant. Bow before him. (But be careful he doesn’t puke on your back–he does that shit.)
I’m writing this while waiting for the trolley because Henry ruined my life.