Dec 152007
 

After much careful deliberation, a considerable amount of mulling, and a brief engagement with hemming and hawing, I have officially decided to participate in No Name Calling Week. This futility workout will begin on January 21, at which point I will shelve my Tourette-ish need to call Henry an ass-fucking moronic dick-shitting piece of trailer trash with a second-grade level spelling proficiency who washes his underwear in a creek. I will not tell Christina she’s a dumb fucking fake Mexican lesbo God-fearing lame rapping banana-stuffed cunt. I will not call my child a Little Asshole.

Luckily, I can still punch the shit out of Janna.

I will be monitored all week by Henry, Christina, Janna and I guess I’ll have to tell some people at work, since that’s going to be a very crucial chunk of the week.

“I’m going to win,” I boasted to Henry.

“Somehow I don’t think the point is to win a prize,” he said, yet another ounce of his faith in me fluttering off to Heaven.

I think I might be biting off more than I can chew. I also think this is intended for school kids.

  19 Responses to “I’ll be the big weenah”

  1. That’s okay, Erin. You can be your own school for that week. You can do it! Does this mean you’re going to be taking out your frustrations by hitting me more than usual?

  2. if you “win”
    i’ll send you a prize.

  3. this will be one of the hardest weeks of your life.

    good luck! :)

    i’ll try not to be so moronic. that might help.

  4. so now what happens when you do call anyone a name…..does somebody have a remote that makes a collar give you a shock or something?

  5. Oh, come on. We’re all just little school kids at heart.

  6. I’ve been trying my damnedest to refrain from complaining lately. I have so much less to say. Daaaang.

  7. You’ve never called me a mean name. :(

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