I have come to embrace the weekly bullet-pointed posts. They really let me get it all off my chest, you know? Kind of like free-style rapping. But way worse.
So here are some pictures and bullet-points. Enjoy. Or don’t enjoy. It’s OK; I hate-read some blogs too every now and then.
- The latest season of the Real World has had its moments (I especially like that they have stopped pretending that the camera people and producers don’t exist), but I’m not feeling it as much as I thought I would be. It started off pretty good, and now that one of the original girls is gone, there actually isn’t a single cast member that I hate, which kind of sucks, because that’s the best part. If you’re a grown-up, or just someone with better TV taste than me, this season is called Real World Explosion because halfway through the season, they surprised the roommates by moving in their exes. OMG EXPLOSION, GUYS, GET IT? But the one girl’s ex isn’t on the show because he’s too busy having a real life by touring with the band Asking Alexandria, LOL all day. Anyway, Henry gets all curmudgeonly when I put it on but then watches the whole episode because he secretly loves it. Sometimes he gets so into it that he has to STAND UP to watch. (see: below.)
- I painted my friend Jeannie a calzone painting a few weeks ago and she then decided that she was going to take me and Nate out for a celebratory calzone lunch. (You’re welcome, Nate.) Anyway, that finally happened on Tuesday and even though Jeannie and Nate didn’t want to sit in the basement of Monte Cello’s (boooooo), it was a really nice lunch celebrating a painting that Jeannie didn’t bother to bring along with her. Anyhow, the point is, I checked in on Facebook and posted the below picture and for some reason over 20 people liked it, which seems excessive for me since it was just a check-in at some pizza place; YOU HUNGRY, FACEBOOK? But it’s not like I have my Masters in Facebook, so what do I know.
- Everyone is talking about CrossFit and Insanity and whatever else kind of extreme workout DVDs you can buy from an infomercial at 3:ooam. But you know what I’ve been doing? Throwback workouts, my friends. I found the Cindy Crawford workout from the 90s on YouTube last week and said to Henry, “I’m pretty sure this workout video is how I fucked up my back in middle school.” Then of course I started doing it and Henry was appalled. “Yeah, that’s it, Erin. Fuck up your back some more.” But you guys, Cindy’s workout videos are the shit because of the music. Primal Scream! The Smithereens! My favorite Seal song of all time (“Crazy”)! And I was sore as FUCK the next day. Yesterday, for funsies, I did Abs of Steel and today I did Tamilee Webb’s other series, I Want Those Arms. Maybe tomorrow I’ll see if YouTube has Jody Watley’s workout video too. (Sorry, Jillian Michaels—I’ll come back to you when I decide to return to this decade.) Fuck Yeah, Tamilee:
- I’ve been slacking on fun nail art lately (lately=the last 6 months). Mostly I just do solid colors and leave it at that, but then my friend Kendahl decided to start her own line of indie polish called Firecracker Lacquer (still in test-mode!) and she is so inspirational with her nail art blog posts that I might get off my ass and start putting in some effort again. The nails below don’t count. I half-assed those all the way to the market. (I don’t know what that means but I’m apparently channeling that little piggy today.)
- Henry and I were watching one of the many “how is this food made?” shows last night and one of the segments was on Rocky Road candy bars. Henry got instantly nostalgic and asked out loud, “I wonder where you can buy those now…” So I googled and the first thing that came up with this Yahoo Answers post from 2010 and I started cracking up. Like CRACKING UP to the point where Henry had to get up and leave because he didn’t think it was funny at all, but IT WAS FUNNY because I kept imagining Henry all hunched over a keyboard in his mom’s basement (because that’s where he was living in 2010?), one finger from each hand striking the keyboard like a piano mallet. “does anyone now were they sell rocky road candy bars????” YOU GUYS, HELP HIM!
- Right before I left for work today, the mailman hurled a box at my front door. My ears perk like a dog’s when I hear boxes hit the porch. “PACKAGE?! FOR ME?! WHAT DID I ORDER?!” I hadn’t ordered anything!! And I didn’t recognize the return address! Henry calmly said that it was probably a bomb and I began to freak out, but PACKAGE got the best of me and I continued to tear away at it with my bare hands. Finally, he gave me scissors and Henry was like, “YOU ALMOST JUST CUT MARCY!” because at this point, I had used context clues to help me figure out that it was a box of weird fruit from my friends Kevin and Liz in Miami!! It was all stuff that I have never seen before and I was like, “HENRY, CUT THIS IMMEDIATELY.” But apparently HENRY didn’t have time. I did get to eat one of those gray balls, though. If I’m reading the accompanying pamphlet correctly, they are sapodillas and basically, that’s all I will be putting in my mouth from now on. The description says they taste like pears and brown sugar, and by golly, they DO. Ugh, just look at this majestic grouping of weird produce. Hashtag-blessed all day long.
- In blogging news, I finally know what I’m going to write for my Pittsburgh Guest Blogging thingie that will be happening on April 1st. WHAT A RELIEF. Aren’t you relieved!? My friend Sandy is also participating so I ran to her office-thing the other day and started blabbering about how stressed I am over this and she was so calm. Why can’t I be calm, ever? I literally almost cried about it a few days ago because I’m known for taking really small things and inflating them to the point where my whole world is consumed by nothing but that I feel like I’m going to have a heart attack from all the pressure that almost no one is putting on me. For as lazy as I am about a lot of things, I am VERY TYPE-A about others. So don’t worry, Guy Who Will Be Posting My Thing, I will have it to you by the end of the weekend. And it will at least be decent.
- One of my friends sent me a message on Facebook and said that he and his wife think Chooch is gifted, and instead of my first reaction being one of a proud mom, I naturally made it all about myself and started to dwell on the fact that I was tested for the gifted program in elementary school and spent most of my life thinking I didn’t get in until one day when I was 26, my mom laughed and said, “No, you were accepted, but I told them I didn’t want you in that program because it was all about that imagination bullshit.” ARE YOU KIDDING!? So now here I am, sitting at my non-gifted desk at my non-gifted job, sighing sadly over my non-gifted life. Please excuse me while I go make some non-gifted coffee. :(
- I was going to also write about all the things this week that have irritated me but it’s just too much.