Apr 112018

I’ve been back at the boring daily grind for a week now and nothing earth-shattering has happened but here are some words & pictures to prove that I really did come back home and I’m not actually secretly living in a seedy noraebang in Korea although that sounds like a reality I could easily get behind.

I know everyone, me included, will be bitching about humidity once summer hits, but good lord can we get a fucking spring up in this city sometime before April ends? We came back home last week to snow, and it’s snowed another two or three times since then. I love the scarf that Chris made me for Christmas, but I’d like to not have a reason to wear it IN APRIL! I was especially cold on Monday, but my peeps at Crazy Mocha had me covered with their berry chai latte special. I like these new people who have been behind the counter at my local Crazy Mocha! The other people never had special drinks. Lame.

Oh well, since it’s still practically winter, I’ve had more time to wear my famous goldenrod tapestry jacket, which garnered more compliments this week — from older men, it’s almost always from older men! And not even in a sleazy way, either. Trust me, I know sleazy. These guys are genuinely just liking my coat because it probably reminds them of some sofa they had in their frat house in the 1960s, who knows.

We babysat Calvin on Saturday! And by we I mean that Henry babysat Calvin, Chooch, and me. At one point, he sent us to the gas station with $7 to get drinks. It was a mess. Chooch wanted one of those weird gas station milkshakes and I wanted coffee and we were also supposed to get Henry water but we weren’t sure if we were going to have enough money since Chooch and I couldn’t just get something normal out of the cooler like Henry told us to, so I suggested that we just not get Henry a drink but Chooch, after considering this for a cool second, vetoed this plan because he is way more mature than me.

“Well, at least make sure this is the cheapest water,” I said and he gave me this sassy look and said, “I already did, and it is.” He used the calculator on my phone to make sure we weren’t going over $7 and we seemed fine but I wasn’t sure if there would be tax because I don’t know how tax works, but then I found a quarter in my pocket, “just in case.”

After acting like boxcar children trying to spend our first ever round of panhandlin’ change, we took our stuff to the register and yay, it was under $7! We were so proud of ourselves!

And that’s the story of how Chooch and I went to the store by ourselves.

Also, here’s a video of me trying to brainwash Calvin into liking Taemin:

Here I am looking like a total douche in my new Gentle Monster sunglasses!

The other day, Glenn disgustedly asked, “What is that you’re drinking out of?” so I got to happily tell him that it’s my SHINee bottle that I bought from the SMTown cafe and he was like, “..Wow I’m so glad I asked” and then I posted this on Instagram and his wife Amanda commented and said she was going to have SHINee playing in the house when he came home and I asked him about it a few days later and he said SHE DID, LOL. So then yesterday I sent him and Todd a SHINee video and said, “You can’t say anything bad about them though because one of them died recently!” and then we had an actual normal and civilized conversation about Jonghyun and Glenn said he “didn’t mind” the song I sent and that he likes them better than BIGBANG. #GlennsKpopOpinions

Anyway, I’m moving to the other side of the department in less than two weeks and I’m super stoked to have new victims to pull down into my rabbit hole.

The next segment has no picture to accompany it, but my felon neighbors are officially moving out. “Ned” was over there last week with a moving truck, and then the broad who I still think framed him was over there the next night with her own moving truck. So, great news, because I don’t want to live next to crims, but I’m also totally clenched at the thought of who will move in next. I’M SO SCARED. I hope our landlord actually does a background check this time.

Well, now that I’m back in Pittsburgh, my life is boring as shit again. I guess that’s OK. I’d rather have boring than drama. I will end this with my current favorite music video. I hope that one of my kpop cardio channels makes a routine for this one!


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