I just went into the bathroom to beat the shit out of my left contact, which was acting like an asshole. When I took it out, it ripped in half. So now I can only see out of my right eye. Where "see" means "squinting out a foggy window." Bob keeps shaking his head and saying, "You should have just told your doctor the truth" and I keep defiantly rebutting this. It’s only a matter of time before I start stamping my feet.
But Collin agreed. "You probably would have had glasses by now if you had told the truth and ordered a pair yesterday," he said. Ugh! Does no one understand that I don’t want to buy glasses??
When I was on my way home from the eye doctor yesterday, two Mormon missionaries were walking toward me. I squinted all up in their faces as the one girl pawned off a Jesus card on me, trying to see if one of them was the missionary girl I interviewed back in October. But they were two new girls that I had never seen before.
I graciously paused and let them talk to me, hoping that God would take notice of standing within such close proximity of religious people, and perhaps he would correct my vision with painless rays of Heaven light, like some sort of Holy Lasik. That hasn’t happened yet, but I keep checking my mail box ofr a voucher.
I asked the girls if they know Hayley. They both seemed taken aback. "You mean…Sister McRae?" the dominant one of the pair corrected me. I forgot that it’s some sort of weird taboo to use their first names. Collin said Hayley’s probably getting flogged right now for revealing hers to me.
Anyway, they’re coming to my house this weekend. I hope God is watching. Maybe he’ll have them bring me glasses.