Oh Honestly, Erin

I woke up on the ferry Tuesday morning, officially in Finland and also feeling sick. :( I dunno if it was just the air in the cabin or what, because I did eventually start feeling better once I got up and ready. I will say that while the overnight ferry was SO CONVENIENT AND CHEAP, it was also kind of chaotic because you have basically an hour to eat breakfast before the ferry docks around 7:30AM. That…is an early start.

We did pay extra for the breakfast buffet – I think it was $16pp which is not bad, really – after I realized before our trip that it was going to possibly be a bit difficult to find somewhere to eat breakfast once we arrived in Turku. Most of the cafes seemed to open around 10 and I really didn’t see us lasting that long without food. Especially Chooch and me. We be bitches.

But dang, that buffet was chef’s kiss. I mean, every breakfast buffet we had on this vaca up until now was impeccable, delectable, incredible, all of the bles you can think of, I’m not a fucking thesaurus. Sadly, we would be on own for breakfast after this, since we weren’t staying in a hotel in Helsinki.

Don’t worry, we’d survive.

Barely.

Sigh.

Um, I wrote IN REAL TIME from that morning so you might already know that Henry jacked up my Turku plans and we ended up just taking a train to Helsinki almost immediately after getting off the ferry, but not before standing on a platform for something that Henry “wasn’t sure” was correct and seeing some kid get bit on the stomach by a dog. That was pretty dramatic. I mean, the kid was screaming and crying but the mom was like, “*shrug*” after half-assedly checking for broken flesh, and meanwhile the dog-owner was like a comic cell of the word SKEDADDLE come to life. She and the dog peaced out big quick. I mean, I didn’t blame her. I am always on the dog’s side. Why did he bite that kid? What did that kid do to him? Probably SOMETHING, you know what I’m saying.

I wonder what the law is like in Finland. Here, if that mom would have pressed the issue, that dog probably would have been put down, and I really fucking hate that about America. So,  dogs can’t protect themselves? OK cool. Great.

Anyway, the train ride was about 2 hours, maybe less. Henry slept immediately for the entire duration, Chooch did god knows what on his phone (actually, he spent almost the whole trip doing deep dives into critically acclaimed music lists during all of the bus rides, etc), and I looked out the window marveling at the Finnish landscape.

My first real observation, while Henry tried to explain to the cab driver that morning what we were trying to do is that English didn’t seem to be AS second-language-y as it was in Denmark, Norway, and Sweden. So this was our mistake not being prepared with better translated instructions for the driver after becoming way too complacent in the first half of our trip. Ugh, we probably totally came off as “those” kinds of Americans, and I 100% swear to god we are not and do not ever expect our dumb language to be spoken by all.

Fuckin’ English.

I was still kind of annoyed with Henry by the time we got to Helsinki and also nervous to see how scary it was going to be to navigate. Turns out, NOT TOO BAD. We were able to get our luggage locker with success, and this was the first time on the whole trip being in a city where you have to pay to use the public restrooms so that was fun (no really, it was cool!). I haven’t had to do this since I was a kid in…probably Italy? Germany? I can’t remember which other countries had pay-to-use restrooms back then. Definitely only accepted coins back then though, lol!

First impression of Helsinki was that the people were chill and laidback.

I think the subway was easy to use? I seem to recall Henry and Chooch fighting over this a lot but we always seemed to get where we needed to, somehow.

He hates us lololol.

We had some time to kill before our apartment for the week was ready, and it was nearing lunchtime, so we stopped inside Hakaniemen Market Hall for a small bite.

First we walked all the way around both floors to get a good idea of what was offered – a lot, that’s for sure, and quite a few vegan options as well! Chooch and I made friends with an older man who had a booth of his original artwork on postcards and magnets plus general souvenir fare like patches, etc. Of fucking course I didn’t have my credit card so we promised the guy we would be back while we went to fetch Henry who was probably erotically sniffing meat odors somewhere. I’m sure the guy was like, “Mmm, heard that one before,” but we really did come back, after snagging some chocolate samples from another vendor and then collecting Henry.

This reminds me that I need to get my print framed still! I really liked that guy! His Helsinki city art was bright and fun.

Then we went back to the very first food vendor we saw, all the way at the entrance, and got pastries and sandwiches. Isn’t it funny when it works out that way?? I homed in on those pastries as soon as we walked in and plus they had meat-free sandwich options, so it was perf.

It was the perfect lunch.

Chooch was desperately looking for Hoobastank to buy for Bill. Inside jokes, you guys. At the time of this trip, our record player was broken had been broken for a few years and Henry kept saying he was going to buy a new one. Our other one was legit from the 70s or 80s and worked so well, but then the needle broke and apparently in this modern area, replacing a needle on an old turntable costs as much as buying a new, good record player. So anyway, every time I told Chooch, “Why don’t you buy something for yourself,” he would say AND PLAY IT ON WHAT?? Anyway, like a month after coming back, Henry finally bought a new one, so I bet Chooch is kicking himself. Dude, I was still buying records the whole time our player was broken! I didn’t understand Chooch’s logic, but then again, I don’t usually understand him at all, ever, so why am I even wasting time typing words and thoughts and feelings about this.

Just can’t escape that piece of shit!

Dude, the amount of times we would be in the area of Helsinki’s Central Station over the next three days….

Anyway, we eventually retrieved our luggage from the locker and figured out which streetcar we needed to get to our apartment, which was in an old building with a super scary vintage elevator, and a mini-geocache sesh was required to procure the key from its hidden spot. It was a very small studio with a double bed and a futon but it was worth it for the amount of time we were actually there, and the neighborhood was so quiet with lots of conveniences nearby, like small markets, cafes and restaurants. And there were bus and trolley stops within walking distance too so I wasn’t mad about it.

View from the window.

Here’s a map for reference.

Taka-Töölö!! I love that name so much!

Anyway, after getting settled in the apartment, it was time for our first Finnish amusement park! STAY TUNED. This park was actually so magical and I think about it lovingly at random parts throughout the day. I would love to go back! It had VIBES, man. VIBES.

Our first day without Coaster Crew was SO FUCKING SAD. Henry and I hung out at the hotel lounge the night before for a bit – Pam and Sherry were sitting at the bar so we joined them even though the bar was JUST CLOSING when we got there. Ugh! I blame Chooch because he made us go out and get him McDonald’s and also we had to get saline solution finally because it was a NOW OR NEVER situation at that point. We saw Pam and Sherry at the bar as we were leaving and figured we had time. WRONG I guess. I don’t know if it’s because it was a Sunday night or what, but it seemed like the bar was closing early-ish?

Anyway, some old man was also at the bar, TOTALLY trying to pick up Pam. It was fucking hilarious. Sherry was like, “Good luck with that,” and left. I feel like he said he owned a shoe store or something and even gave me his email address too, which I promptly left in the hotel room. “Do you want this?” Henry asked the next morning while packing, holding up the scrap paper with the email address.

I just looked at him liike, “What do you think?” so he tossed it.

Anyway, Tim, Brandon, Ally, and Jeremy were also hanging out in the lounge. It was a somber evening. Everyone was just quietly nursing their drinks. Tim came over and thanked me for the note I wrote on the back of the Liseberg print, having read it by then. It was also the first time we really talked to Jeremy, and he was so great. I wish I could rewind time, go back to the beginning, and talk to everyone more. HINDSIGHT, etc.

The next morning, I woke up in a foul mood because sometimes that’s how I project sadness: full-throttle bitchiness. We went down to breakfast and it was another MAGNIFICANT buffet but…it was missing Coaster Crew (I did see Amy and her husband down there, and even though we never talked to them – they really kept to themselves mostly – it was nice to see familiar faces). Still, the food was so good and I wish I could go back JUST for these amazing Scandinavian breakfast buffets. They were such a highlight.

We ended up sitting next to an American? Canadian? family – parents and two young kids. I didn’t really pay much attention to them, but Henry and I got up together at one point to get more FOODZ and when we returned, the parents were laughing and conversing with Chooch who was in the process of trying to SAW OFF one of his park wristbands with a BUTTER KNIFE. I was like, “Jesus, I thought we were safe leaving you alone for a minute now that you’re SEVENTEEN but apparently not!”

“Maybe you should ask the front desk if they have scissors!” the dad suggested with a laugh.

We left shortly after that and I made a big production of telling the family to have a nice day (and by “big production” I mean that I said, “Have a nice day guys!” with a fake smile since I was still trying to hold back COASTER CREW tears). As we passed through the lobby, Chooch stopped to have someone at the front desk assist with the wristband removal operation, and then as we got on the elevator to pop back into our room before checking out, THE FAMILY ALSO GOT ON THE ELEVATOR so then I was stewing in awkward sauce having JUST went out of my way to say goodbye to them, and now I had to do it again??

Henry and Chooch will tell you that it wasn’t that big of a deal, but I must have replayed this moment over and over in my head for like 3/4 of the day. This is what we call AN AFFLICTION.

Checked out. Got our luggage tagged so that we could pick it up later when it was time to get the ferry to Finland. Embarked on our walk to Gamla Stan, Stockholm’s iconic Old Town, which was pretty close to our hotel and actually even closer than we initially thought, as we would accidentally discover later that day.

But let’s just look at pictures of Gamla Stan because even though I was in such a bad mood, I did get over it and I actually love these pictures so much even though there was a lot of BICKERING that went on behind the scenes.

We really didn’t think we were going the right way, and then suddenly:

This square is REALLY iconic, total Instagram spam. It’s always crazy seeing sites like this in person because they often seem so much smaller in real life. This was one of those times. I thought it was so beautiful and was so excited to be there but also – it was just a very small square!

It was still really early in the AM so we beat the tourists, but the lighting was also bad since it was so early. You take what you can get, right?

We walked through here a few hours later and it was PACKED. I think this is where the arguing started. Sometimes I get so frustrated when it comes to photos and I know IT’S SO FUCKING STUPID because truly no one else cares but me, but in my very busy and loud headspace, all I can think about is wanting – nay, NEEDING – the perfect shot because what if we never come back here?? And every time Henry took a picture, we were covered in shadows. He kept yelling, “YOU CAN EDIT IT LATER!!” but I wanted to be PERFECTO from the GETGO.

This one was less bad because Chooch took it but it still wasn’t what I wanted and I was getting frustrated. This went on for probably 15 minutes – look, I’m laying it all out for you. I was being a fucking BRAT. I was. I admit it. Henry, if you’re reading this  – SHUT IT. I still think you take terrible pictures of me!! But I was overreacting bigly.

I just wanted to have one nice picture of Chooch in this square. You never know, one day he might actually care and want to show his future spouse these old dumb pictures.

Not even pretending to smile at this point, lolololol. I bitched because Choocg “cut the tops of the buildings off” and he was like, “Take it yourself, I’m out” and then literally left us there arguing and went to look at souvenir shops.

The Nobel Prize Museum opened while I was trying in vain to show Henry how to take the picture I wanted of myself and he just couldn’t fucking do it, his sausage-fingers kept rejecting any angle that wasn’t making me look like My 800 Lb Life so he would revert back to his usual way of setting up the shot and I looked so homely and PISSED probably because I ACTUALLY AM ONE OF THOSE THINGS 24:7 AND THE OTHER THING I AM MOST OF THE TIME.

I wonder how many times I ended up in the background of someone else’s photos, making stank face, radiating with SPOILED AMERICAN BITCH syndrome.

I took this photo as an example of what I wanted but Henry FAILED. Oh well, at least we got a decent shot of HIM out of the miserable process. Ugh.

Things got better from here after we left the square. And by that, I do mean “after I stormed off and acted like I had ANY IDEA where I was going.”

I pretended to be really interested in these monuments while Henry and Chooch casually strode behind me at a safe distance, knowing that I would eventually come around and not bothering to coddle me. WHICH I HATE. Sometimes I WANT THE CODDLING.

PAY ATTENTION TO ME.

I let them catch up to me and decided that I’d give up on my search for a flight back to America that day and maybe go shopping for souvenirs instead. Plus, Henry and Chooch were like, “Coffee?” and I’m always up for coffee. So now we had a new plan to replace my TAKE FANTASTIC PHOTOS IN THAT GAMLA STAN THING quest.

You know, moving on and all that.

I was still pissed off, but what can you do?? The live version of this photo is hilarious because my smile is replaced SO QUICKLY with the most unflattering grimace/scowl and I completely walk away, lol.

These little alleyways though! I could have probably spent the whole day just poking around this area.

Henry chose this cafe and got completely ripped off by the old guy / owner. Lol. I know Sweden is notoriously expensive but I’m pretty sure the going rate for two coffees from some no-name alley cafe is not $25. Good one, Henry. More photos from here over in my last post re: photos from the “good camera.”

I loved this shop so much! It’s called Hilda Hilda. I bought Sue a dachshund print pouch because I just couldn’t pass it up. It was too cute and I loved that it’s quite literally made in Sweden as the tag says. See above for evidence!

I linked the shop – ya just gotta check it out, man. Ya just gotta.

We should have gone to THIS cafe!

Anyway, after shopping for about an hour (and running into Scott and Judy!) it was time to move out of Gamla Stan and explore some other areas. So, look forward to that post I guess.

Hello here are some photos I took with the ‘good’ camera in Stockholm – mostly around the Gamla Stan area. Some of these were also taken by Henry I guess because I was making him carry the camera and he took that as an invitation to play travel fotog I guess. Anyway,  I have a bunch of pictures on my phone too that I haven’t gone through yet so I will post something more comprehensive soon but I can tell you right now that the first hour or so was BAD NEWS BEARS. I was in such a shitty mood because Henry wasn’t following any of my direction when I was asking him to take a picture of Chooch and me and it was actually embarrassing. Just didn’t want to give the impression that everyone was so fucking perfect OMG family vacation yee haw.