Nov 192022

Henry and I were working on house projects all morning and then took a break in the afternoon to try out a new-ish bakery in my old turf, Jefferson Hills. It’s called Sabatello’s and it’s billed as Pgh’s first goth bakery so it had been on my radar since I used to be a fake goth from 1998-2001.

Actually, we were on our way to Michael’s for spray paint when I started whining about needing a treat, fucking mutt that I am, so that’s how this happened.

First of all, they have a purple door which I immediately embraced, and the interior is black and white stripes with purple accents and Halloween decorations sprinkled throughout.

The owner came out immediately to greet us and tel us about their offerings and she was the fucking cutest goth and SO FRIENDLY – I love friendly bakery people which you would think would be a prerequisite but I have walked out of Potomac Bakery numerous times with a SOUR TASTE IN MY MOUTH.

Can I just say that before delving into the descriptions of her baked goods, she took a moment to gush, “Your hair color is STUNNING.”

Girl. THANK YOU. I go to Bad Apple and Carly is an artist, I swear.

Ok anyway!! We bought an array of goods but I need to tell you about the cheesecakes, posing here in front of the Cure wall in honor of their goth roots.

Egg nog & white chocolate cranberry, good lord. The white chocolate cranberry one is my favorite. They were both so light and melt-in-your-mouth-y.

I’m going to make a habit of visiting regularly so that I can ingratiate myself into a friendship while eating my way through all of the cheesecake flavors.

Then we came home to Chooch taking a shower and all the water pouring out of the dining room ceiling so that was cool considering the waterfall was directly above one of the walls we’re repainting. Anyway, the slumlord is allegedly sending “Cliff” over, whoever the fuck that is, because the leaking pipe we have been reporting to him over and over for like 2 decades has finally rusted itself into oblivion so now we can’t use the shower/tub until “Cliff” fixes it.

It’s fine. Everything is fine. But if you don’t hear from me for a while, assume that I drowned in the creek I was attempting to bathe in.

Say it don't spray it.

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