Back in 2019, we went to Silver Dollar City during Thanksgiving break for their holiday festival thing. We had a nice time BUT!!! Henry had hurt his back the morning we were supposed to start the drive there and was unable to ride anything except for the carousel and a dark ride. And also, the temps were below average almost NONE of the coasters were running that day. The mine train, Outlaw Run (their RMC), and Fire In the Hole (indoor ride that counts as a coaster cred) were the only ones Chooch and I were able to ride that day and it was so painful to be that close to Time Traveler without getting on it, let me tell you.

I made sure to blast JACKIE BLUE on the drive there. I think it was about a 15 minute drive from our hotel in the big tourist trap area of Branson. The park opens real early – I think around 8:30am. They have the sections with all the rides roped off, but there’s a big courtyard-y area with shops and bakeries where you can get some morning sweet treats or a sit-down breakfast buffet.

OR GO TO CHURCH:

Chooch and I got trapped inside here because as we were trying to leave, a family came in and the mom was standing outside of the doorway taking pictures of them so Chooch and I had to dive to the side to avoid living in some strangers’ family picture for eternity. I got stuck in a pew next to a young girl who said, “It smells weird in here.”

“Kind of like pee,” I said, and she scrunched up her nose and agreed.

Chooch thought she had said it smells GOOD in there and was appalled that I countered with my pee comparison. It was funny at the time BUT I GUESS YOU HAD TO BE THERE.

Henry did not join us for this churchy pit stop.

But here he is afterward being embarrassing.

We had about 15 minutes before rope drop so we chose the artery that leads to Time Traveler and proceeded to stand amongst the other early birds in the ALREADY SWELTERING SUNLIGHT. Not even 9:30am yet and it was just going to get hotter. This time at least I wore a black shirt so my sweat couldn’t be seen. Ugh.

I forgot that SDC is one of those stupid ass patriotic parks where men have to remove their hats while we all have to endure the NATIONAL ANTHEM. This is excruciating ESPECIALLY in the current times, being a country led by a pedophile and Nazis. I stood with my arms crossed, scowling, as a bunch of asshole behind me sang along in reverence and then one big asshole hollered, “AMERICA!!!!!” at the end. Fuck off.

I will say that this definitely set the tone for me, at least for the first 1/3 of the day.

But! We finally got to ride Time Traveler! It wasn’t that long of a wait – maybe about 15 minutes once the ride actually opened, 20 minutes total. They assign seats here and we all got the second car.

Not to be a bitch, but the whole time I was expecting to be blown away and I just…wasn’t? Am I spoiled now? Am I losing interest in coasters?? I don’t know. But this coaster is supposed to be elite and I was just like, “OK?”

Then we walked over to Wildfire, but it was down, lol.

Wish we actually were from Canada, honestly.

Powder Keg!! I REALY enjoyed this one. What I did not enjoy was that the Fast Lane (I can’t remember what they call it there) definitely had priority. Chooch and I were waiting for the front row and lost two chances to go because of Fast Lane and I was livid when I saw that some of the Fast Lane people got right back in the Fast Lane line and got to ride it again before us! The bitch who took the front row had a beet red sweaty face so Chooch and I kept saying, “There she is, red face!” every time we saw her throughout the day. I hated her.

Fast passes are the worst creation ever. Do it like they do in Europe or don’t do it at all.

The park wasn’t even THAT crowded but Fast Lane made it feel like it was. At least for this coaster.

We probably only ended up waiting for 30 minutes and I guess it was worth it? I did enjoy it but the line was REALLY long by the time we got off so that was a one and done for us. It had a nice launch though.

I was very excited to get on Outlaw Run again! Especially since this would be Henry’s first time (sad that I can’t brag about having one extra RMC credit now compared to him – ugh). Now look, I watch lots of coaster content on YouTube because I am big fat loser so I was aware that there have been big complaints about how Outlaw Run runs now. I heard it’s gotten very rough, there’s a pothole at the bottom of the first drop, etc.

Even still, I was not prepared for this trainwreck it’s become. HOW is this the same coaster that Chooch and I straight-up marathoned in 2019??? Back then, it was a walk-on every time and we were shocked about that – an RMC with no lines?! Unheard of. On this day, it was also a walk-on (except that we wanted the backrow and it was on one-train ops so we did have to wait) on a fairy crowded day in July. But after that first drop, I could understand why. There is no way the general public like this coaster. When it’s too rough even for a thoosie? It was actually heartbreaking how bad this coaster has become and I was sad that this was the version of it that Henry had to experience. We all hated it. It wasn’t even worth riding in another row for science.

PLEASE, Silver Dollar City, ask RMC to come back and fix it! They should have been working on that instead of refurbing Fire in the Hole!

Which, speaking of, we rode next. The line was long because I think it was actually broken down when we got there because the line just wasn’t moving at all. Meanwhile, there was a mom and her young daughter in front of us, and then an old man in front of them. He turned around and started talking to the mom and the girl (mostly the girl and it was fucking creepy – he had pervy Farmer Jed vibes). THEN he did the dread “OVER HERE YALL!” wave, summoning his wife and young girl who he introduced as HIS DAUGHTER MARY and I fucking swear to god she was like 10 and this man was in his 70s. Henry didn’t hear this part but when I told him later, he kept insisting that she was probably his granddaughter BUT I AM TELLING YOU, HE SAID DAUGHTER.

Then!!! He kept shouting, “BILL! BILL! WE’RE OVER HERE!” and I was like, “AW FUCK NO” when I saw that Bill had numerous other people with him. Bill was standing near the entrance to the ride and yelled back that they were still waiting on someone in the bathroom. Bill kept saying, “We’ll just ride it separately” but Farmer Jed was like, “NO YOU WILL CUT PAST EVERYONE IN LINE AND RIDE WITH US FOR GODS SAKE.”

I was like peeling my skin off at this point because LINEJUMPING IS CAUSE FOR REMOVAL FROM THE PARK YOU FUCKING MOUNTAIN DWELLER. GO HOME AND DRINK YOUR MOONSHINE WHILE SHINING YOUR HUBCAP COLLECTION WITH YOUR SNOTTY RAG! And take your weird ass daughter Mary in her church dress with you! I felt like she had a tag on her somewhere that said Product of Incest.

I kept saying, “This is bullshit, let’s just get out of line, I don’t want to deal with this” but Henry and Chooch were too busy being poisoned by the sun to care.

Then the line started moving at a pretty consistent pace which definitely led me to believe that the ride must have been down that whole time (good ol’ RMC). The switchback eventually brought us back around to the entrance before the line wound its way inside the building (Fire in the Hole is a dark ride) so now we were directly across from where Bill and his clan had been waiting for the pissing member of their gang. Perfect timing – they were all now accounted for and JUST started to get into line when Farmer Jed was like, “JUST COME UNDER THE BAR HERE!!!” meaning they would have skipped out on the whole outdoor section of the line, cutting at least 50 people. There was a lot of hem and hawing on Bill’s part, and I made STRONG EYE CONTACT with who I can ony imagine was Bill’s wife and slowly shook my head no in the most threatening way I could muster without also having a switchblade to flick open and close.

Bill said, “Naw, we ain’t gon’ do that” and then he and his family proceeded to GET INTO THE BACK OF THE LINE!!!!! So Farmer Jed’s old hag said, “LET’S JUST GO WITH THEM THEN” and ducked under the bar and left with Farmer Jed and Mary from the Hills Have Eyes in tow!

I WAS ELATED!!!! Chooch said, “See?? And you wanted to leave. But it all worked out.” He said it in the most inyerface way imaginable though so my smug joy was shortlived.

Anyway, we rode it. It was fine. We got stuck just outside of the station though because someone on the train before ours had puked AND IT TURNS OUT IT WAS THE LITTLE GIRL THAT FARMER JED WAS TRYING TO GROOM IN FRONT OF US!

And on that note, I will end PART ONE. But just know that I really fucking hate linejumpers so much. Especially in this new age we live in where no one wants to confront anyone for fear of becoming a viral video or getting stabbed.

We’re on our way home from Long Island after seeing Enhypen’s Walk the Line concert last night. It was FANTASTIC.

Now, I’m not really that much of an ENGENE (that’s their fan name in case you care) but I do know all of their members and 90% of the songs. In fact there was only one song they performed last night that I wasn’t sure if I had heard before. But I sat out last summer’s concert and had big regertz after that. Mostly because when they came back with their song “XO,” I was fully obsessed.

So when they announced this current tour, I bought 2 tickets in the 200s section.

The drive was long and uneventful. We were able to check into our hotel in Linden, NJ on the way so that was nice, but we didn’t hang around very long – long enough to put on the latest Jake Webber video which I sent of picture of to Chooch and he said he was glad he wasn’t there lol:

It was only around 4pm but we left immediately to start the drive to Long Island because GPS reported lots of accidents + rush hour. And we wanted to eat somewhere before the concert too.

The drive was chaotic. I absolutely could not do this myself, and I am secure enough in my GIRL POWER attitude to admit that this is a big reason why I am glad to have a man/driver at my beck and call.

We went to this vegan place called Rockin’ Roots. It was VERY small and two of the four tiny tables were taken.

The whole reason I wanted to go here was because they have vegan sushi but when we got there, the chalkboard menu had everything erased under the SUSHI heading and their printed menu doesn’t mention it at all so that was my sign that they didn’t have any for that I guess. I got the daily special – the Cuban – instead. It was really good but I only ordered a half and was still so hungry after. Not to mention that the lady at the table next to us HAD SUSHI. AND SHE DIDNT EVEN FINISH IT. I figured she must have gotten the last of it and I was pissed.

Also, Henry bumped the table SO HARD that my can of Olipop tumbled over and this was literally a second after I had decided to wait to pop the top. That could have been such a disaster because we were like 90 minutes away from our hotel at that point and I’d have had to go to the concert in Cherry Pop stained shorts. It didn’t happen but I was still so mad at him for being an oaf.

THEN SOME GUY IN AND THE DUDE WORKING BEHIND THE COUNTER TOLD HIM HE COULD MAKE HIM A LOBSTER ROLL!!!!!

I was soooo mad.

Henry was like, “I’ll go up and order one to go!” But at that point I was fully committed to pouting and ruining the day at least for the next hour or so, so I said, “NO JUST FORGET IT!!!”

Then I proceeded to whine incessantly about still being hungry because Leo problems. We ended up stopping at a crappy bakery and got a really crappy cookie. I couldn’t even finish it out of principle and the stubborn need to stay in my diva character.

I was still being a bitch when we arrived at UBS Arena but then I started getting freebies so this pulled me back down to earth. I love getting freebies at kpop concerts!!!

Then after we got in a really long line, some UBS employee came over and was yelling, “Are there any AmEx cardholders here??” And I yelled, “Ooooh!!! Me!!!!” So he gave a handful of us instructions on where to locate the ELITE AmEx entry lol. The line over there was much shorter after all the non-cardholders were weeded out but I’m not sure how much time it actually saved us once doors opened.

While standing there, I got a bracelet and a keychain after I heard the rustling of cellophane behind me – I turned around to see an older lady and her little kid handing them out and I said, “Oooh! Can I have one too?” Being an older fan, you have to speak up for freebies or else most of these people will assume you’re too old to care but yo, I will always be young at heart enough to want to wear friendship bracelets with idols’ names on them. I even got sunnies with “EN” beads glued to it and a rubber duck with the concert date and location written on the bottom! I love stuff like this. Especially SINCE THE CONCERT TSHIRTS WERE ALL SOLD OUT, dafuq???!!! I ended up having to buy a dupe on Etsy today.

My Enhypen glasses lol. I got them from one of the girls with the girl wrapped in the flag in line in front of us, in case you were dying to know. There was a young teen girl also in line in front of us and she kept scrutinizing me, I felt like. She was looking at all my kpop accoutrement dangling from my purse and I really like she was judging me and trying to determine if I was a legit fan.

Answer: I’m a certified and legitimate multi-stan. You’re safe.

Mister Softee sighting!!!

We were in section 208, the middle of row 1. Henry was happy because this meant he could stay seated through the whole thing while enjoying an unobstructed view. I was just happy to be comfortable and take it all in since it was my first experience with ENGENES. They might possibly be the loudest/screechiest fans I have encountered yet. If I close my eyes, I can still hear what sounds like horny seagulls ricocheting in my ears. It was cracking me up because the screaming was at full capacity JUST WHEN ENHYPEN MVs WERE PLAYING before the show started. I was like, “Dang if they’re expending this much energy just on music videos they’ve seen a million times, how will they have anything left for the actual concert?!”

Oh not to worry – they had A LOT left in the tank, lol. I appreciated their unwavering moxie, for sure! I could have done without the teenager behind me legit BELLOWING, “NI-KI!!!” at random intervals. Like girlfriend, he isn’t going to look at you up here. But I get it.

OK I gotta say – I was RULL into this concert. I went in as a casual stan and came out having an existential crisis over who my bias is (it was Jungwon and Sunoo going into this but HEESEUNG GOOD LORD, MY GUY) and then Henry and I spent the car ride home today dissecting everything, putting on our favorite songs for relistens, evaluating their stage presence, etc. I can confidently say that I have NO REGERTZ – NONE after this experience. They held my interest from start to finish.

Sunoo though! He was so adorable all night. Easy to see why fans call him the Happy Virus.

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I super-loved the people around us in our row. There was an older woman to my right, and then Henry had an older couple next to him. Loved that for him. There were two empty seats next to the lady next to me, and around 8:40, these two girls (I really think it was a mom and daughter but it was hard to tell) came running in, plopped down into the seats and immediately TOOK UP SO MUCH SPACE. I was like, “Yo, how do you people lack THAT much noonchi?? LOOK AROUND, GIRLFRIENDS – you’re encroaching upon the personal space of others!” Now, they weren’t directly affecting me that much, I could only see them in my periphery, but I felt so bad for the lady next to me. She was having a great night and these two numb-nuts came, started filming each other lipsynching, USING THE FLASHLIGHT ON THEIR PHONES, and turning the night into a legit photoshoot with their selfie sticks. I get wanting to capture memories, etc and it’s not like I don’t also film snips of songs, but they were being SO PERFORMATIVE. One of them clearly had to be a TikTokker, that’s all I can figure. She was also dressed like the daughter of a corrupt CEO in a K-drama in a weird fitted suit dress. Looked like this:

They were literally the ONLY negative parts of the whole night. Even after the show, they stood there and blocked our row from leaving because they were back to doing another photoshoot until Henry elbowed past them and muttered a gruff, “EXCUSE ME.” I mean, there were like 8 of us trying to get the fuck out of there.

Like I have said before, people enjoy concerts their own way but this was just so incredibly obnoxious. Like, turn your fucking flash off!!!

Anyway!! The highlight for me was when they performed Bite Me, No Doubt, Moonstruck, Pass the Mic (I LOVE this song after seeing them perform it live!) but MOSTLY I was there for XO. I love that fucking song SO MUCH. It really helped distract me when I was mourning last year.

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Overall, I would say that it was well worth the ticket price and excruciating pain of having to get back in the car again after just spending a week driving around Missouri and Iowa (that was poor planning on my part – I already had these tickets on lock before I started planning my birthday trip and didn’t even consider the fact that this was literally DAYS after we returned from that long-haul road trip, oops). It made me appreciate them even more after seeing them in person. I will say that Seventeen and NCT127/NCT Dream really have us spoiled when it comes to the in-between videos (VCRs if you’re a kpop stan), and DEFINITEY onstage banter & encores. It comes off so effortlessly with those groups, and especially with Seventeen – the encores are untouchable, unlike any other concert I’ve ever experienced. So it’s a high bar! But Enhypen, for being a relatively “new” group (only just debuting in 2020), already have such a strong collection of songs and their personalities come through HARD on stage. I’m so excited to see where they go and will happily stan them even harder now!

THIS JUST IN: Henry said out of nowhere that he likes their song “Loose.” I put it on for him and now he’s doing weird car-dancing to it with his arms and it’s making me uncomfy.

ETA: it’s been three days and I had to come back here and say that for just being a “casual” fan, I have not been able to stop thinking about this concert and have spent all weekend bingeing Enhypen content on YouTube. I’m officially an ENGENE and for confident in my bias choice of Jungwon.

Also! I failed to mention that before the show, we stopped at one of the arena bars and the middle-aged woman bartender asked Henry if he was the same guy who was there for the show the night before as well (Enhypen performed two nights at UBS and we were night 2).

“He looked just like you! He was carrying a bag of candy.”

“I wish he was carrying a bag of candy,” I mumbled, fixing my Firestarter eyes upon Henry’s dumb face.

“I just thought it was so cute that he was here with his daughters,” she gushed, and I was quick to inform this broad that Henry was here because he likes Kpop and not because he was a chaperone.

“We like this stuff so much that we got married in Korea,” I said, never letting an opportunity to brag about this pass me by. Hey, I waited 23 years to get married, let me fucking live.

She was like, “Oh wow,” and didn’t really have the same “That’s cool!” reaction that most people do? So, after we walked away, I was like, “I mean, she didn’t think I was your daughter, did she??”

So, that was fun.

After being Lookie Lous at the St. Louis Arch last Sunday morning, we continued on to Six Flags in Eureka, Missouri. I think it was about 30 minutes outside of St. Louis, and my first impression was that it seemed kind of beautiful from the road, for being a Six Flags park. It’s nestled right at the base of a fluffy green hill/mountain:

(I snagged this shot from Photos at Six Flags St. Louis | Parkz – Theme Parks, no clue who to credit but it’s not my picture.)

We kept our expectations ultra-low with this park. Six Flags in general is meh – when thoosies say “We had a Six Flags day,” it’s not generally a good thing. Most of the locations lack soul, just tons of ugly asphalt, no heart, massive and unruly lines, employees putting in minimal effort. The DC Comics IP gets really old. Some have outstanding coasters though. This one….well, lol.

My second impression was that the entrance was beautiful! Minus the guy who saddled up as soon as I took this picture, lol.

Before I get into the rides, I want to say that yes, it was unbearably hot on this day too. Like, I was sweating through my shirt an embarrassing amount before we even rode the first ride. However, this did seem to keep the crowds at bay so literally everything we rode was either a complete walk-on or a station wait. We actually spent more time walking through through the empty queues to the station than actually waiting to get on any coaster in the park that day. That being said, this played a HUGE ROLE in my overall thoughts of the day. Because in the end, this day was so memorable to me in the best way and it could have been completely opposite if we were there on a mild-weathered day with huge crowds. Give me the humidity over long lines any day!!

We started off with American Thunder – a woodie that again, I had low expectations for. We got right into the back row while Henry took the front seat and thought he was so cool for that too.

YO this was surprisingly good! Not too rough at all. I saw someone call it “glass smooth” and I would certainly not take it that far but it was definitely enjoyable and I would also say re-rideable too. Jumping ahead here, but we should have just re-ridden it immediately because all of the other coasters in the park got progressively worse and by the end, no one was physically stoked to ride ANYTHING twice, lol!

On the exit path, some girl in bright pink shorts was apparently desperate to get past me but I didn’t notice her until Chooch physically moved me over. She ran past me so fast that I barely registered her. In every park, there is always that one person/group that pops up over and over again and this time, it was Pink Shorts. We saw her cutting the line for the next ride….

I was most excited for Mr Freeze!! It’s kind of iconic because it has a backward launch! There is a Six Flags in Texas that also has one, but they switched it so that the launch is now forward and there have been rumors of this happening to this one too. So, I felt a certain type of urgency to get on this before that happens.

Here’s a POV:

I LOVED this but shoooooo, this took it out of me, pals.

“Did you hear me screaming??” I asked Henry as we exited.

“That’s a stupid question,” he muttered.

I was sopping with sweat at this point, and cold sweat to boot thanks to the fear that Mr Freeze instilled in me. Launches always get me!!

Chooch and I rode a wild mouse-type coaster after this but Henry was like “I’M GOOD” and sat on a bench. He didn’t even take a picture of us though!?

I had no opinion on that coaster – it was hot. It spun. It dropped us back off in the station. I peeled my moist thighs off the seat. The end.

I wanted to take our #carouselfie immediately after this before my hair got too wet (at one point it looked like I had come from the water park, you guys. It was really that bad) but Chooch got side-tracked by Bugs Bunny and then we missed the carousel line cut-off and had to wait for an entire rotation which is actually kind of annoying – who the fuck has time to wait in line for the carousel?? Had to get the shot though.

That sheer kimono thing came in clutch to hide all of my absolutely savage sweat stains.

Interestingly, the carousel was playing some bizarre fight sequence, assuming it was to make us feel like we were in some type of battle? It was jarring! The revolution before ours had regular calliope music playing!

In his dreams, he’s The Boss.

Well guys, this was A W F U L lol. Like, so bad that it was actually a HIGHLIGHT for me because of how fucking hilarious it was. I mean, ALL of us were OOFing and UGHing our way through this nightmarescape and it was a long ass ride too. Now we knew going into this that it was going to be bad – it’s infamous for being rough and shitty. The majority of thoosies have strong opinions on how much they hate it, but there are a small handful of The Boss Apologists out there. I honestly thought that while it was rough, chaotic, potentially hazardous even??, it was also memorable for being these things. It was an EXPERIENCE. Like getting a bad tattoo.

We have ridden less rough coasters that we hated and will never ride again but also have no lasting memory of. This actually felt bonding, like a simulated car crash that we experienced together as a family and survived and can now laugh about it. Does this make sense?? Did The Boss knock some of the remaining sense out of me?? All I can tell you is that while I had immediate bruises forming on my person, I was also laughing so hard that my ribs were hurting (OK, the jackhammering contributed to some of that pain). Honestly though, even Chooch was wheezing. This ride was SO BAD that it was good?? But would I ever ride it again? OK, definitely not that same day but I think I probably would if we ever went back.

Yeah, I said it. Does that make me a Boss Apologist too? Maybe. I’m OK with that.

FUCK why didn’t I buy a Boss shirt?!

(I just said this out loud while Chooch is in the kitchen and he said, “Wow, why are you so obsessed with the Boss?” I mean….)

Apparently, there used to be a helix near the end that was removed – I would have loved to have experienced that!

After that, Chooch and I rode some kids’ coaster which was the only time we had to wait in line. (There was a guy behind me wearing pants and a coat and that is the only thing I remember about this – being so repulsed at his outerwear choices on this sweltering day). That coaster was fine, bland and not memorable though. Then Chooch got to spin some wheel for children, landed on Osage and won a small plastic neon pink horse. We were like “Osage, whatever that means” and then it came up numerous times throughout our Missouri portion of the trip and now we know that Osage is a Native American tribe – knowledge! SEE?? ROAD TRIPS ARE EDUCATIONAL. It helps when you’re stupid and have lots to learn anyway.

I admitted that I didn’t think this Boomerang was the worst one I’ve ridden and Chooch was appalled by this. “REALLY? Because I was thinking it was definitely the worst one I’ve ridden.”

(Also I need to quit using this particular Hipstamatic filter on pictures that feature people because it makes us look like we have skin diseases.)

We still had THREE MORE shitty coasters left:

• another wooden one (Screamin’ Eagle) which was the last one Henry did for the day because that one was also terrible and from here on out, he sent Chooch and me to ride the wooden ones first so we could report back. He just told me last night that he pretty much had a headache for days after riding the Boss lol.
• a fucking Vekoma SLC called Ninja that had a pretty cool entrance – I was going to take a picture of it afterward but the headbanging knocked that thought of my head so I forgot all about it. Here’s someone else’s picture because I also just realized that the Boomerang was the last picture I took anyway lol:

(THIS IS NOT WORTH THE WAIT, NOT EVEN A LITTLE – luckily it was a walk-on for us)

• And last but not least, of course this location has a Batman clone. No notes on that.

All in all, it took us about three hours to get park completion (just the coasters). The longest we waited for anything was the kids coaster – about 10 minutes. I didn’t HATE this park. In fact, I thought it had some charm and in a really masochistic twist, I would actually kind of like to get a night ride on the Boss someday!? Am I crazy? Maybe in the fall so I can wear a padded coat.

Anyway, we opted to cut out of here early and start our drive to Branson so that we could be refreshed for a day at Silver Dollar City on Monday!

Our first amusement park of this summer’s chaotic coaster road trip was Beech Bend in Bowling Green, Kentucky. This is a very small park that probably isn’t on the radar of the general population unless they live in the area, but coaster enthusiasts (those cray-cray thoosies) will go out of their way for it because of the wooden coaster – Kentucky Rumbler.

There are two other small coasters here, and a dark ride, among a collection of your standard carnival-type rides like a Music Express and a Scat 2. We knew this wasn’t going to be a full day park by any means so we were content with rolling up around 3:30PM last Saturday, after driving since 8AM from Pittsburgh ugh, and paying the “evening rate.” PLUS HENRY GOT THE SENIOR DISCOUNT LOLOLOLOLOL. Chooch and I were calling him Our Senior after that. :)

My first impression was – yay, free parking! The parking lot was a large grassy expanse and so much better than your typical asphalt slab.

Second impression was that it reminded me of a much less run-down Camden Park in West Virginia. You got that same rural vibe and glorified carnival-type rides, but they were much better maintained and the park itself had lot of beautiful landscaping and flowers. Also had Waldameer vibes, a little.

Kentucky Rumbler was the entire reason this has been a bucket list park for quite some time. It’s always a crap shoot when it comes to woodies, but I had heard such glowing reviews for this one so I got in line with confidence. My first impression was that the ride had two ride ops who seemed to genuinely want to be there – they were friendly and chatty with the riders!

Also, it was a station wait!

Second impression was that this coaster WAS AWESOME. It surpassed my expectations! All I was hoping for was something that wouldn’t jackhammer me, and this was as smooth as a violent woodie can possibly be, IYKYK. Our first ride was backseat and we were SCREAMING! I kept calling the first drop “the swirl” though, and I am certain that this was bigly getting on Chooch’s last nerve. I was very giddy – imagine being in the car all day and then let loose to ride a wild, bucking bronco of a wooden coaster. Shoooo.

Totally re-rideable too, even for Henry! What a gem tucked away in rural Kentucky, honest to god. And honestly, this set the bar high for the rest of our trip. I was expecting the FIRST COASTER of a weeklong road trip to be this exceptional, but here we are, a week later and I’m still thinking about it longingly and running my fingertips over the Kentucky Rumbler magnet that now adorns my fridge.

We would come back to this side of the park later to get some more rides on it, but first we had to acquire the other two coaster creds in the park…

…and terrorize Chooch with selfie requests.

Not pictured, but this was in line for the SBF Visa Spinning coaster which are a dime a dozen these days, especially at the really small parks like this one, indoor family fun centers, boardwalks, etc. Nothing to write home about.

Oh shit, now that I’m looking at this picture, Chooch and I rode the Starship 4000 later that day and it was my first time riding one of these in A MINUTE. I sincerely think the last time was probably the Butler County Fair?? In fact, I can’t remember ever riding one of these with Chooch, so that was exciting! Until it started whirring and I quickly remembered just how uncomfortable these are, especially considering it was about 10 degrees hotter inside that space prison as it was outside, and I can’t remember it physically hurting my sternum?? Like, I honestly thought something was going to crack inside of me and I was psychically pleading for the fucking cycle to end.

The carousel was right across from the spinning coaster though and I was like, “PUHLEASE can we take the carousel now because I get any sweatier???” I quit using deodorant with aluminum in it because I’m so afraid of cancer here there and everywhere, so I was fucking sweating like a lumberjack through my shirt. It was pathetic. But good god, it was like standing on a frying pan set on the sun that day and would not get any better until halfway into the week.

Anyway, they’re smiling because this was only the first carouselfie of the trip and neither of them had to take the picture. This doesn’t last long LOL.

OK I was already stoked that this place has a dark ride, but this one blew me away!! It was old-school, which I love, BUT it had a lot of extra auditory effects which heightened the experience by a lot and seriously creeped me out in the best way. And not only was the ride experience totally memorable but the ride op – LYNDA LOVE – was so adorable and personable! There was a family that got in line straight from the water park, and the women were unfortunately only wearing coverups over their bathing suits so Lynda had to turn them away because pants are required on all the rides there. There was a bit of a language barrier and Lynda turned to us and said forlornly, “I wish I would speak their language.” We asked Chooch if they were speaking Spanish and, not once looking up from his phone, shrugged and said, “I don’t know, probably.” And Henry said, “Well, couldn’t you tell them what she said?”

“I mean, yeah probably. But I think they got the gyst,” he said in his patented “can’t be bothered” tone. Thanks, Chooch! Always so willing to go the extra mile.

Anyway, I screamed a lot in the haunted house, in case you were wondering. Also, it was air-conditioned in there and felt amazing. Lynda’s parting words to every car was, “Enjoy the a/c!” This was after giving everyone instructions on what to do if the ride breaks down so I guess that happens frequently.

Normally I would have been ALL ABOARD for Scat2 but it was so hot and humid that even now as I think back to this, I want to vomit. Hard pass, Scat2.

The Wild Mouse was the last credit we needed. In line, I instructed Henry and Chooch that we had to sit all three together, no spaces in between any of us, to ensure maximum spinning. I legit said this so many times that I was getting on my own nerves.

There was a single ride ahead of us and I was NO GODDAMIT because I thought for sure the ride op was going to send us all in the same car, but he sent the single ride by himself! Then he came over to me, squinted at my shirt, and yelled, “PIERCE THE VEIL?! WHAT’S THAT, SOME KIND OF ROCK BAND??” I said yes and Chooch was irritated. “I wouldn’t call them ROCK,” he music snobbed as we slid into the car.

Yeah, I know, but the dude was like 70, letting him believe they’re a rock band isn’t hurting anyone!

MEANWHILE!!! Henry the Dissenter didn’t slide all the way in and was about to leave an empty seat between him and Chooch!! Right as the ride op was about to lower the bar, I screamed, “NO!” and made Henry slide over a seat, which made him grumble. The WHOLE WAY up the lift hill, I berated him for not listening to me re: seat assignments.

“I was listening! I just forgot!”

“FROM 2 MINUTES AGO???” I screamed around Chooch, who was willing himself to astral project back to Philly.

Yo, thank god Henry had enough time to swap seats because that was an INSANE Wild Mouse lap. I mean, we were spinning extra on the course but when we got to the brake run, we sat there for a good minute spinning like the Spaceship 4000 – I was laughing so hard that I couldn’t catch my breath and was near tears.

When the ride op finally brought us back to the station, he was laughing too. “THAT’S why she wanted you to move seats!” he said to Henry, who just frowned in response. ;)

“Do you want to ride that?” I joked to Chooch.

“The AMBULANCE?” Chooch cried. I mean, I was gesturing to the little kids truck ride under that pavilion, but wow, get dark with it, Chooch.

There was big, dreary warehouse-type structure with “games” and a snack bar, and also “party rooms.” It was pretty bleak in there so I think Beech Bend should work on make that area more festive and less “this is where Farmer Beechbend used to store the feed and hoes.” I used the bathroom in there – it was two stalls, super tiny and HOT – and a mom was in the stall next to me struggling to get her kid to take a shit. This was the second time that day that I had an unnerving public restroom experience with a mom and her unruly child.

Meanwhile, Henry bought himself a soft pretzel and Chooch and I ate most of it. :)

I really thought that said “Cabananas 1 -19” and “Cannabis 1 – 5”.

Did you know that I can’t ride pirate ships anymore as an adult? I can ride the most extreme coasters and spinny shit, but pirate ships will knock me out. It’s the rocking motion – side to side or front to back, it makes me nauseous. :(

We did not ride this janky backyard log flume and I lowkey regret it even though we saw one of the logs get stuck at the top of the tallest drop, lol.

We spent the last part of our day lapping Kentucky Rumbler. Station wait every single time – could have been a walk-on even if we weren’t such bitches for the backseat.

Ew, on the way out, we stopped to watch some game that was being played on this stage and I DID NOT APPRECIATE THE WAY THIS BABY WAS LOOKING AT ME.

Chooch said that it looked like his friend’s brother Roman, but I thought he said, “That baby looks like it’s broken” and I screamed OMG IT DOES.

Delightful swings!

Anyway, the park closed at 7 (ON A SATURDAY? IN JULY?!) but we managed to do all we needed to do in about 2 hours – plus, we were overheated and STARVED. I would definitely stop back here if we’re ever out that way though because Kentucky Rumbler is just THAT good.

Needed a break from the chaotic coaster road trip recapping – it really hit me today just how tired I am. And old. Lol. It’s going to take a bit to get all of this documented!

But here is a collection of the magnets I accumulated over the past week! Kind of regret not getting a new one from Silver Dollar City though now that I see which one I already have on the fridge (it’s mid).

I’ve been trying to get Chooch and Henry to tell me their favorite moments and of course it’s like prying a femur out of Jeffrey Dahmer’s mouth. Mine is how our waiter at a pizza place in Branson because a household name for the rest of the trip, and actually the WORST coaster of the whole trip -The Boss-because it was so bad that it was actually hilarious. I also loved stopping at The Arch in St Louis and walking around Des Moines during a late night lightning storm.

I still maintain that the best road trip we’ve done is the Florida Spring Break 2022 ambitious coaster credit collecting.

LOL Henry just tried to say his highlight was “being close” to me the whole time which is a joke. Now he’s thinking of a real answer. There’s smoke in the house.

“It wasn’t Six Flags,” he scoffed. (I actually thoroughly enjoyed our time there lol.)

“Driving sucked so that’s not a highlight,” he murmured. Wow, he’s really thinking.

Final answer: “I don’t know.”

Cool! Cool cool cool.

When researching this trip (and to be frank, not as much effort was put into this as I usually would have), there was one BIG NON-NEGOTIABLE, NON-COASTER tourist attraction that I found and refused to forget: The Shrine of the Grotto of the Redemption in West Bend, Iowa.

Henry was big annoyed about this, but we managed to fit it in on Thursday, on the way to Lost Island Theme Park in Waterloo. Chooch, having paid attention to absolutely nothing aside from “Erin’s birthday trip” had no clue what was going on so when we parked, he looked out the window and incredulously cried, “What the hell is THIS???” And to be clear, his tone was incredulous in a disgruntled and put-out tone, and not even remotely awestruck.

What is this place, one might ask? To summarize with the help of Wiki because I have had half of a beer and can barely type:

The Shrine of the Grotto of the Redemption is a religious shrine in West Bend, Iowa, in the Roman Catholic Diocese of Sioux City. A conglomeration of nine grottos depicting scenes in the life of Jesus, it contains a large collection of minerals and petrifications and is believed to be the largest grotto in the world.

It is also “considered to be the world’s most complete man-made collection of minerals, fossils, shells, and petrifications in one place.” The estimated value of the rocks and minerals which make up the Grotto is over $4,308,000. Over 100,000 people visit each year.

It includes a museum with precious and semiprecious stones from throughout the world, and photos and artifacts about the construction of the shrine.

I did learn on my own that this was originally constructed in Wisconsin and eventually moved to West Bend, Iowa.

I am not religious but I will honestly go out of my way to gawk at religious tourist attractions and cathedrals. I love me some cathedrals, especially in Europe.

I tried sharing with Chooch that I enjoyed a small window of “rock collector” status when I was in elementary school but he gave no fucks. It’s true though – there was some science-y nerd hut in Century III Mall near the pet store and I was obsessed with it. My grandma actually let me pick out a rock collection starter set once and I thought I was a geologist at that point, like show me the way to the next quarry, I’ll be there as soon as I ask my mom to drive me.

My collection didn’t go very far, and I kept fucking with some of the more fragile ones so much that they started to flake apart. And aside from purchasing some pyrite and other basic backyard rocks from the Laurel Caverns gift shop, I eventually moved on to other collections. Like collector spoons and brochures from rest stops and hotel lobbies, crippling insecurities, and hitchhikers, and eventually antique wheelchairs. My life has been so full.

Of crap.

Chooch got a call related to campus housing for the fall (he’s staying in some swanky suite with three friends and that’s going to be fun paying for that now too) so he disappeared for a while. How is he an adult now, I hate it.

(And adult in Minions Crocs, mind you.)

I kept demanding pictures of myself because I was so stoked to be here, lol.

This is smack in the center of a small neighborhood. Imagine having this majestic rock palace outside of your house. You could take your lunch break inside one of the caves, chilling next to a shark skull and Baby Jesus while noshing on a PB&J.

I did catch Chooch taking some pictures so guess he thought it was interesting there after all!

This particularly reminded me of Fruity Pebbles and melted Crayon art. Obsessed.

That pop of green!

There were even shells and creepy skeletons and bones from the sea.

Can you believe that Henry CLEANED THE LENS and  took another picture of this one because of the “glare”??? I  was like, “Um excuse me, what glare? That’s the fucking SEARCH LIGHT FROM HEAVEN singling me out, motherfucker.”

Originally, it was going to be nighttime when we stopped here (it’s always open to the public) and I think it would have been so majestic and ethereal at night so I’m kind of bummed that Henry switched things up. (He’s so good at that, why do I bother with an itinerary.)

LOL Chooch, always on Troll Patrol.

It was so nice that it wasn’t 100 degrees this day so I was able to have my picture taken without looking like a glazed ham beneath a frizzy coif. This was the first day of the whole trip that I actually blew dry and straightened my hair knowing it wouldn’t immediately soak up the humidity and revolt.

The gift shop was pretty mid. It was mostly actual religious gifts and rosaries, etc. and less souvenir-leaning. I got a really blah magnet BUT also a matchbook which looks like it was made in the 70s. I was really looking for a commemorative plate because the museum had a whole collection of those in a case and I was hoping that maybe they had a current design, but I GUESS NOT.

LOOK AT THIS CEILING!!!

Obsessed, you guys. Obsessed. In my opinion, definitely worth a stop if you’re even remotely in the area. It’s free but they accept donations, so we did donate + we made a gift shop purchase. They offer free guided tours as well and one was just starting while we were there, but we just didn’t have enough time since we needed to drive an additional 2.5 hours to the next stop after this.

Plans shifted and instead of going to Green Bay today, we decided instead to change the route and go to Indiana Beach in Indiana. This put us closer to home and there are two “new” coasters there since we last visited (2022 I think?). These pictures are from somewhere in Indiana after we left the park.

Full recap another day, but I will say that I made it all week until today before my period started and I had awful cramps the whole time we were at Indiana Beach. I’m so glad it happened today though and not on one of the super hot days, especially not the Silver Dollar City day because that day was already slightly miserable and ugh, if I had crippling cramps on top of that??!! We probably would have started our return trip home that day, tbh.

We left Indiana Beach around 5:00 and Henry found maybe the WORST restaurant in the area for us to have dinner before starting the drive home. It was called HARVEST TIME and if the FISHY FRIED GREASE stench in the parking lot wasn’t enough to deter us, the non-HEINZ ketchup bottle on the table should have been the last straw.

Chooch and I both got a grilled cheese with tomato and fries. I got mine on rye bread and I suppose that’s what was served to me because it looked slightly different than Chooch’s but tasted like no rye I have ever known. And you know it’s bad when Chooch agrees with me on anything but we both hated our food. I have never had such dry grilled cheese!! It was like they toasted the bread in a toaster and laid the cheese on it afterward – sooo dry and not even partially melted. Not even a CORNER of the cheese was soft.

And the fries were dry with no taste. Bad coffee too.

I was really mad about this and declared that Henry is banned from choosing restaurants from now on.

(I should note that this travesty occurred because MR HAPPY BURGER IS PERMANENTLY CLOSED AS OF LAST YEAR – I could fucking cry  I’m so glad I have that French fry wrapper framed!!!!)

Anyway, it’s 10:17pm and we’re just now passing Columbus. I can’t wait to go home and see Penelope. <3

We spent my birthday evening at Arnold’s Park on Lake Okoboj, as previously reported. I bought this magnet and the old white man I purchased it from held it up to his face, squinted, and said, “This is missing something. Ahh! It’s missing TRUMP sitting there!”

Pal, only if he was buried head first in the sand would I want that. Gimme my fucking magnet.

We had just been observing that day too how nice it was that we weren’t bombarded with TRUMP paraphernalia throughout Iowa like we had been in Missouri. Not even a single Trump yard sign or billboard – it was so cleansing on the eyeballs.

And then that happened. I actually wasn’t even sure if that was what he said initially because I had let my guard down the whole time we were in Iowa. Branson? Would not have been fazed. But I was very taken aback and actually wish I had walked out without the magnet but I already paid for the fucking thing. Of course, this morning we went back to the Okoboji Welcome Center and I found a much better magnet so maybe I’ll “write a picture” of an expired Trump on this one, cankles jutting out of the sand.

Today is my birthday and out of everything that happened today, here is my absolute favorite:

At Arnold’s Park earlier tonight, we were sitting down at a table, eating. Chooch had cheese fries and Henry and I both had small personal pan pizzas, in a box. I was bitching because no one brought over napkins so Henry got up to fetch some, obedient dog he is. Literally AS SOON as he walked away, Chooch swept his arm out and accidentally knocked over Henry’s TALL cup of Diet Coke, which had NO LID.

Coke flooded all into his pizza box, completely drenching his slices – and mind you this was AFTER Chooch helped himself to one and Henry hadn’t had ANY yet. I was initially mad because I thought it got on my shoes (they’re new Vans!!) but once I realized it was fine, I started cracking up and then Chooch started cracking up and then Henry came back to the table, saw what happened, and was…decidedly NOT cracking up lol. Chooch goes, “I’m sorry. But it’s your fault for not putting the lid on! Here, I’ll eat the one they got the most Coke on it” so now Henry was left with only two slices of pizza and nothing to drink.

LOL

Flash forward to about three hours later. We’re at our hotel (Okoboji Inn) and there is drama because our room is a king with a sofa bed. Chooch is too big for the sofa bed so the nice woman at the front desk brought up a roll-away bed for him.

Of course, this one was also problematic for our little Princess and the Pea. He was jostling all around on it, squeaking the springs and bitching up a storm.

“I’d rather just sleep on the floor at this point!” he cried, so Henry suggested that he move the mattress to the sofa bed since it was the bed frame that was causing his discomfort. Henry of course had to set down the can of beer he treated himself to at the gas station after we left Arnold’s Park and help him because Chooch is my son and we contribute the bare minimum to these things. In the process of this hectic maneuvering, Henry turned around and yelled, “Aw goddammit my beer spilled!”

I honestly almost peed my pants, and then Chooch was cracking up too which made me laugh harder, back and forth. We feed off each other’s giddiness!

“You have literally spilled everything I had today!” Henry cried from the bathroom, like calm down bro let’s not be hyperbolic here.

I guess when you have had 46 birthdays, dumb things like this become highlights.

ETA: I was just reliving this moment with Chooch and he said, “His beer didn’t just accidentally spill. It spilled because I threw a pillow at him.” EVEN BETTER.

Hello from a new-to-us state! I don’t know why but going to Iowa was one of the  things I was most excited about when planning this trip. Just because, why Iowa, you know? Like, who goes to Iowa for vacation. But it just so happens that there are some cool amusement parks here!

Anyway, we spent most of the day at World of Fun in Kansas City, Missouri after checking out the NOT-Victorian in Branson. It was another hotter than Hell day. 95 degrees I think but the “feels like” was 108. It felt every bit that hot too.

We left there around 5:30, (they closed at 7:00 but we had already done everything we needed to do, plus get re-rides our faves) and stopped at ZOMBIE BURGER in Des Moines. We made it there around 8:15 and I’ll be so for real here, it wasn’t all that – just a gimmicky place capitalizing off of horror by decorating with zombie art and naming the food after horror movies. But I buy into that shit, PLUS they had a veg section. I had homed in the Negan burger, which was the Zombie Burger’s own veggie nut burger and that sounded fantastic plus, NEGAN.

“I hope they actually have it, or I’ll cry,” I said, because, tragically, “Sorry, we don’t have that anymore” follows me from restaurant to restaurant.

“HOW?” Chooch dead-panned. “Do you even have anything left? You’ve been crying all day.”

Wow. He is such a good son. The best boy.

Anyway, YES THEY DID HAVE IT.

Henry got a beer and I had some sips. It was a WarPigs Foggy Geezer IPA. I created a monster with him and IPAs. Bro, branch out a little.

The Negan! It was good – my favorite part was actually the bun. It was very soft and fluffy and I enjoyed it very much, thank you for asking, omg you’re too kind but no I don’t think I’ll be starting a bun-reviewing periodical at this time.

Bathroom graffiti.

Decor was really on point.

Oddly, a baseball game was on the TVs at the bar – if I’m going to a zombie-themed eatery, I’m expecting zombie classics playing on a loop. But cook on with your baseball game, I guess.

Afterwards, I didn’t want to immediately go to the hotel. We’ve  never been in Des Moines before and I wanted to see some of it! Henry signed and drove toward the river at my command. There was parking along the bridge! So we did that and Henry thought I was just going to get out and take a quick picture but turned into, “Let’s just walk to the edge of the bridge and back” which then bled into, “I want to just walk a block down there and get a picture of that sign.”

“The TRAVELERS SIGN?” Chooch scoffed in a who cares tone.

“Yeah, I like it,” I shouted back. LET. ME. LIVE.

We saw whatever the fuck this is on the way, and the CASEYS CENTER – a venue named after Henry’s new favorite gas station that he has stopped at a hundred times on this trip so far. Also, there was a baseball stadium with a game happening and Chooch found out it was their minor league team, Cubs. I wanted it to be the Cornstalks.

Come on, it was a cool sign!

I didn’t look to see what this is, I assume an art museum or something.

After walking back on the other side of the bridge, I determined I was satisfied and that we could go. But then I saw what HAD to have been the Capitol Building peeking out in the distance. I SCREAMED when Henry got onto the highway because I thought he understood by my cries of childlike wonder that I wanted to get CLOSER to the Capitol. So, he muttered under his breath and veered off onto a ramp back into the downtown area. Yayayayayayay!

Oh, and I should mention that there was a wicked lightning storm happening, which got way worse and has since turned into a storm-storm as I sit here in the hotel writing this.

I just really thought this was so beautiful and am so happy that we got to see it at night!

This is the Iowa Soldiers and Sailors Monument a/k/a “Iowa’s Most Scandalous Statue”:

LOL – this is on Roadside America so I was stoked to get to mark another idiotic thing as “been there.”

So, that part of the night was very nice – I like when we get a chance to actually see parts of the cities we visit for roller coasters, especially because I can’t foresee any other reason that would have brought me there. And from what I saw, Des Moines is beautiful!

Then the night took a turn when we drive the 15 minutes to Altoona Iowa to check into our hotel, which ended up being a Best Western directly across from Adventureland with a ton of truckers parked in the lot and the area was just bad vibes all around. When Chooch and I  were waiting for the elevator, one of the aforementioned truckers  walked past and mumbled, “Welcome to the shit hole” to us. WTF.

Then we got to our floor and some weird child-thing came slithering out of its room at the same time as someone from the floor above took off running back and forth and then as soon as we opened the door to our room, there was maniacal pounding from the room above.

“Nope,” I said and walked right on out. Henry was in the hallway at this point and I said, “I’m not staying here,” as I walked past him to the elevator. Just felt it in my gut. The trucker’s ominous non-greeting, the stampeding, the blah room. I couldn’t do it. Not on the eve of my birthday. This of course resulted in a big argument in the car, but now we are ready for bed in a nice, clean, reputable Hilton:

Sory. But sometimes I need to be fucking spoiled, and I don’t care. I wasn’t sleeping in that other place. And for as much as we harped on Henry over the Branson hotel, that one was clean and quiet at least. No frills at all but we slept well and it legit felt like we were the only ones there. Not a peep from the other rooms.

I don’t know what the plan is for tomorrow. The weather looks iffy – storms and rain. Not sure if the park will even be open. If it’s still lightning the way it is tonight, I don’t know what we will end up doing. :/

Shit, son, am I getting too old for this or what? We’re only on Day 3 and I am so depleted lol. Granted it’s been 95 degrees every day and we have been at amusement parks aka pavement tundras. Today was Silver Dollar City and it was a long ass motherfucking day. Mostly good but there were some low lights as to be expected with long and humid days navigating crowds (actually wasn’t crowded though) and hunger. A ton of memorable moments though that will probably become long-lasting inside jokes of course – I laughed so hard at one point that it felt like I damaged something internally.

One of the last things we did before calling it a night was have Chooch take pictures of us in front of VICTOR THE BULL, downtown Branson.

You’re welcome ;)

Bonus: here’s a picture before we went to SDC, from a “scenic outlook” which was anything but?!

Random jean skirt?!

Meanwhile, we were joking that even at the scenic overview, there was a huge billboard for Dolly Parton’s Stampede. It is legit everywhere you look around here.

Even the elevator door at our dumb hotel that chooch and I hate but Henry loves. We’re annoyed because there is a really beautiful hotel called HOTEL VICTORIAN at the top of the hill but Henry was too cheap to let us stay there. So Chooch’s response to everything is, “I bet THE VICTORIAN has [insert something our hotel doesn’t have].”

Last night, we walked up the road to get to the main drag so Chooch could get some stupid +1 coaster cred at one of the many family fun zones here. It’s a pretty steep grade and Chooch huffed, “We wouldn’t have to walk up a hill if we stayed at the VICTORIAN.”

Then this morning, he said, “I’m opening the window so everyone at the VICTORIAN can look down on us.”

Dude you guys were fucking delirious at this point, lol.

We just stopped at the Arch on our way to Six Flags – the first time I saw it IRL was at night when we drove past it en route to Silver Dollar City. Even then it was horrifying to me. Being up close at its base was even scarier!

Please enjoy these pictures. We didn’t do the tour because we don’t have enough time but being there was enough for me, tbh!

I feel like everyone has been asking me lately if I’ve watched Kpop Demon Hunters and the answer was always a polite no. Honestly, it’s not because of the hype and I’m being a K-hipster or whatever, but I just genuinely don’t care for animated movies. I think the last one I gave my full undivided attention to was probably CARS.

CARS!!

That was a long-ass time ago.

And it’s not even the “it’s for kids” reasoning because you all know how much I loved Degrassi and iCarly as a full adult, lol.

I had listened to some of the songs though because of Twice, and a lot of my fave idols were all up in my IG feed doing the Soda Pop challenge, so I definitely knew some of what was up.

Then on Saturday evening, Henry and Chooch blew me off for a night at Blake’s (I wasn’t invited and yes we talked about my hurt feelings in therapy today LOL) so as they were walking out of the house, I said, “That’s fine, Penelope and I wanted to watch Kpop Demon Hunters anyway, so I guess that’s what we’ll do tonight.”

Chooch mumbled, “Thank god,” because he’s such a hater and refuses to be around me when I’m consuming any kind of media that he deems “lame” or “overrated.”

So, that’s just what Penelope and I did! We drank some Lolev beers (OK, I only let Penelope have a few whiffs) and we quickly becamse ENGROSSED in this movie.

Like, immediately obsessed.

Screaming over the kimbap and cartoon versions of recognizable places in Seoul, LIKE THIS PLACE – the Seoul Fortress Wall / Naksan Park where we visited on our first and last trips to Korea and when I tell you that I felt an ache in my heart, like a full-on PULLING and TUGGING, I am not exaggerating.

OK, heartstrings. I feel you. You exist.

Ow ow ow.

And Namsam Tower was so prominently featured too, I was in tears.

This movie!

The music!

The Korean culture!

It was beautiful, and by the pivotal scene at the end, I was in fucking tears.

I get it now, you guys! I understand why this movie is trending – it is beautiful, funny, original, and has the BEST songs. But oh, did it make me feel achingly homesick for a place that isn’t even my home. We have been talking about this lately, about how I have wanted to go to Romania for more than half of my life and am finally (God willing, etc etc) going this year, and I was wondering if this will replace Korea in my heart. Henry and I just looked at each and both said, “Nah” at the same time. I can’t explain it but Korea feels like somewhere I’ve lived before, in another time, and each time we visit it hasn’t felt like a vacation, or even your traditional “trip,” but something so much more nostalgic. And for a cartoon to play on those feelings – I was in deep!

It was not the worst way to spend a Saturday night after being ditched by your family, LOL.

The best part though is that apparently, this is Blake’s kids’ favorite movie at the mo’ and it was on at his house so Chooch was unable to escape it after all. He was so surly when he came home, LOL!

Anyway, I made Henry watch it last night. I said, “You can watch this while I look up stuff for our trip,” but then I ended up sitting here and fully watching the whole thing again. I hate myself haha.

Kurt Travis time!

On the way there, I had made some outlandish statement about how I’d be fine “just sitting at the bar” during this show since I’m so far-removed from this scene now, etc. But then as Kurt and his band (Zac Garron was there as his guitarist!! Love him) were about to start, I said, “Byeeee!” to Henry and ran out to the floor, getting a cozy spot at the side of the stage. It’s a pull, you guys. Like magnets. I can’t fight it.

Dude, what can I say that I haven’t already said a thousand times over the years about Kurt Travis? This show really brought me back, man. He is so incredible! He could go on a “Kurt Travis Sings the Alphabet Song” tour and I would be waiting for the presale.

We had a good 30 minutes to wait before it was Anthony Green time so we people-watched and I guess chatted, what do Henry and I even chat about. He wasn’t even sitting next to me at our table, but catty-corner!

“Do you think Anthony’s going to be chaotic?” I asked Henry, trying to make CONVERSATION.

Henry just gave me the “now THAT’S a stupid question” smirk in response.

Then it was Anthony Green time! Dang, I am so so so far-removed from this scene but it still felt like no time had passed since I last saw him. I think it’s been quite a while since I last saw Circa Survive, but I’ve seen him with Saosin, LS Dunes, the Sounds of Animals Fighting, and solo myriad times in the last decade at least. I’m fairly positive that every time we’ve gone to Riot Fest, he’s been there in some capacity. (The last time we went in 2023, LS Dunes and Thursday were both there!)

I know I’ve written about it a million times on here, but Circa Survive SPECIFICALLY was such a big part of my life. Juturna got me through my pregnancy to the point where I wouldn’t be surprised if Chooch was partially triggered by the opening notes of any song on that album.

And the first time we saw Circa was the summer of 2005 at the Grog Shop in Cleveland, which was my first time there, actually! And I patiently stood outside that night with a bunch of fanboys, literally the only girl  there, waiting for my chance to tell Anthony how much he means to me and could he please sign my CD. I was wearing my mom’s old Jacki Sorenson aerobics shirt from 1984 – that is the ONE THING that is seared into my mind.

That, and the guy I was standing with telling me that Anthony literally stopped him from killing himself. He had told the guy to reach out to him if he needed to, and he took him up on that and Anthony talked him down. I will never ever forget that. Anthony has always been a genuine person, through all of his own demons and struggles he has always cared about the people who love his music and that comes across so strong at all of his shows. No matter which band he’s with.

So, hearing him sing his solo work on top of some Saosin and Circa that night was so cathartic. It definitely put me in a weird headspace, but overall, it was healing. A merging of my past and present, in a way – a reminder that I can still hold on to pieces, the healthy parts, of my old self without it stunting my personal growth. Does that make sense? Because it made me realize how far I’ve come since those old days of seeing Circa at the Grog Shop, Warped Tour, Mr. Smalls — still loving music with my whole stupid heart but also being so much more stable now. And it’s nice to be able to go into it without feeling SICK TO MY STOMACH like I would get back then, that hyper-nausea of preparing to see a band that made me feel like I had just cut my wrists because I loved them on such a psycho-emotional level. Now, I can just chill out with Henry and enjoy it for what it is, feeling the feelings without it crippling me.

I don’t know what started this exploration of my past (oh yeah, therapy lol) but it feels like it’s doing good things for me.

Then this happened and FML honestly lol:

IT’S A SURPRISE YOU HAVEN’T CAUGHT ON YET IT’S NOTHING PERSONAL YOU’RE AN EMBARRASSMENT.

Ugh, I used to cry and sing that part out loud while walking in the cemetery in 2005.

We lingered a bit after the show because I was hemming and hawing about getting Kurt to sign  the vinyl I bought, and also because we were 99.9% percent certain that one of our Sugar Spell Scoops friends was in attendance and we wanted to say hello to him.

Yo, why am I such a baby when faced when speaking to bands?? Literally Kurt was standing there totally unbothered and I was still so weird about asking him for a minute of his time?? I walked up  to him, holding the vinyl against my chest like a 1950s school girl clutching onto her poety notebook with dear life, and asked, “Hi, will you sign this?” in SUCH A FAKE BABY VOICE WHAT IS MY ISSUE.

He was happy to do so and while that was happening, I said, “I saw you in Pittsburgh 10 years ago exactly playing a house show at some kid’s house. You thought you were the oldest person there, but nope! It was me.”

I feel like HE REALLY LOOKED AT ME at this point, maybe trying to remember, and whether he did or not, who cares because he said, “Damn, if that was 10 years ago, then I’m even OLDER now! And look at us both, we’re still out here!”

I loved that sentiment because, yeah really! Look at us! In our mid-40s and out late on a Tuesday night for the sake of amazing music.

Kurt then gave me an abbreviated version of what he’s been up to personally, including buying a house in N.California with his girlfriend and dog. “It has 4 acres!” he said, and I was genuinely so happy for him, for getting himself to a good, safe and happy place. For still making music.

“I don’t think I’ll ever be able to stop making music,” he said after I told him I’m so glad that he’s still out there doing his thing. It was just a really good and super real moment. I already love his music so much, but this really added a special sheen to that.

We ended the night by chatting with our Sugar Spell friend (Mychael – I hate myself if that is spelled wrong) at the bar about the future of Pittsburgh vegan ice cream (please come back soon Sugar Spell!) and I was laughing because we all recognized each other earlier in the night but, seeing each other out of context of an ice cream shop and out in the wild really threw us all off. He said he had texted Amanda at one point like, “I really think it’s them!”

Anyway, he was at the bar with Zac Garron! I guess they are friends! I didn’t want to be a creep and ask, lol.

I didn’t talk to Zac because he was mid-convo with another couple but what a small world.

Yeah, so that was a super action-packed night! I felt like my social battery was crazy-depleted as we walked through the parking lot but it was so worth it, even getting home way past my bedtime and being embarrassingly hung over the next day – AND I HAD A VIDEO CALL. Oh well.

_____________________

On the way home, I was musing about the night. “I can’t believe I’m at the age where musicians I have loved for years are now talking to me about how much acreage they have.”

Sigh.

OK OK OK this was such a fantastic night and probably I’m blowing this up in my head but I feel like so much happened that night that I am preemptively tired just thinking about recapping it so I’m splitting it up into two parts. Because it’s my blog, and that’s just what we’re going to do, OK.

When Henry told me a few mths ago that this show was happening, I wavered on getting tickets for some reason – complacency, laziness, etc. But then I got into Kurt Travis SO HARD again recently and I was like, “OK sold. Lessgo.”

I was so stoked all day at work about this and my pal Lyda from our Seattle office let me go off on Teams about my history with all three singers – Anthony Green, Kurt Travis, and Geoff Rickly. It was so much fun sharing music with her while also getting to retell some of my favorite stories, like the time I dragged Janna, who could give a shit about the bands I like lol, to some frat kids’ basement in Oakland for a Kurt Travis house show 10 years ago!

Anyway, the show as at Jergel’s in Warrendale, and at first I was annoyed that it was a bit of a drive outside of Pittsburgh when I should have just been grateful that this didn’t require us to leave the state as EVERY KPOP CONCERT does.

This is what I was wearing. Ignore my old-ass fugly face.

Idiot Henry.

We arrived a good hour or so before the show started so we had plenty of time to grab a table, get some drinks, and order food. I had a really good wheat beer from Troegs and Henry had who cares. Our food was mid, but our server was an actual delight – so attentive and friendly without being overhearing and her smile never seemed fake – EVEN AROUND HENRY. It was just good vibes.

Meanwhile, Henry had checked out all of the merch booths on his way to the bathroom and reported that not only was Geoff Rickly’s book available at his merch table—it’s been on my TBR list for a few years—but Geoff himself was up there selling his merch.

“Go talk to him,” Henry urged.

“And say what?” I sighed. “‘Your sweat got on me when I saw you play at Smiling Moose with United Nations and it was one of the greatest concert moments of my life’?” And then, “DO YOU REMEMBER THAT??”

“Yes, Erin,” Henry said. “How could I forget.”

Then I joked that I could ask him if he’s still friends with Robert Smith (Henry rolled his eyes) because FUN FACT/STORY TIME:

The first time I saw Geoff’s band Thursday was in 2004 at Coachella. Yes, back when Coachella was only moderately despicable and schmoozy. Influencers didn’t exist yet, after all. I really liked Thursday a lot back then so it was a bonus that they were going to be there, as we were there FIRST AND FOREMOST to see The Cure.

Henry was much less open-minded about 99% of the bands I enjoyed back in the 2000s and I remember he was very “……….” about Thursday so he does not remember this AT ALL but it was like 113 degrees that weekend in the desert if I remember correctly, and Geoff ended up passing out on stage. I was so scared and screamed when it happened! Clearly he ended up being OK but that always stands out in my mind.

Anyway, they were playing on the same stage that The Cure would be headlining on later on that weekend.

That summer, The Cure put together something called the Curiosa festival and toured around the US with it. Thursday was one of the bands they brought with them and when we went to the Cleveland stop, I’ll never forget Robert Smith telling the crowd that he loved Thursday so much when he saw them at Coachella and had become friends with Geoff, and personally invited them onto the Curiosa festival.

It was something that really stuck with me, all these years later. It was such a heartwarming moment because at the time, Thursday was still an up-and-coming band and to be taken under the wing by the actual Robert Smith? What a dream!

Anyway! Geoff went on first that night. Just him and his guitar.

He told us so many great stories, starting with that when Anthony told him about this tour, he thought Anthony meant that this was just a solo singer thing, so he was kind of surprised when he showed up alone and saw that Kurt and Anthony brought their bands with them. Just his deliver made this so funny YOU HAD TO BE THERE OK.

More Geoff anecdotes:

• He said when he was asked if he wanted to go on tour with “the singer from Dance Gavin Dance,” he hesitated and asked, “That depends….which one?” and everyone in the crowd laughed so hard. IYKYK! And when he found out that it was Kurt, he said, “Fuck yeah, best one!”
• Geoff said that while he is now clean, he used to NOT be and told us about how one time years ago when he was on tour with Anthony Green, he was so drunk at the airport that he couldn’t scan his boarding pass so the staff at the gate said that they wouldn’t be able to allow him on the flight, so Anthony stepped in and said, “It’s ok. I’m his dad.” And they let him on the plane. This even made Henry laugh – Anthony and Geoff are around the same age. WHY was this so funny to me?? I was thinking about it the next morning and laughing all over again!

Also, Geoff not only resembles Wendy’s husband (mostly just from afar because I have bad eyes) but their laughs sound nearly identical!

His set was phenomenal and already I was patting myself on the back for not skipping this show just because it was on a school night.

While Kurt’s band was setting up, I went over to buy Geoff’s book “Someone Who Isn’t Me.” While I was standing in line, I was watching the people before me showing him their Thursday tattoos and otherwise proving the longevity of their fandom by having him sign old concert tickets and setlists. I’ve always just been a more casual fan (although I was PISSED at the last Riot Fest we attended in 2023 because the gates didn’t open until late due to rain so as we were waiting to get in, Thursday started their set and we had to be content with just hearing it from a Chicago sidewalk, le sigh) so I wasn’t sure what, if anything, I was going to say when it was my turn.

I started by shyly asking if he had any books left and then after he retrieved a stack from a bag, I proceeded to ask—still in my shy voice—if he would sign it for me.

As he was signing, I said, COMPLETELY OFF THE CUFF I WAS SO PROUD OF MYSELF FOR NOT LETTING MY SOCIAL IDIOCY TAMPER WITH MY WORDS, “I love your music, but I could listen to you talk all day. Your stories are so great.”

“Thanks!” he said. “Then hopefully you’ll like the book, too.”

And then something dumb came over me, and I stage-whispered (CHOOCH HATES WHEN I DO THIS BECAUSE I HOLD MY HAND UP TO THE SIDE OF THE MOUTH AND EVERYTHING FOR THE FULL EFFECT), “Can I ask you something weird?”

Geoff, still signing my book, glanced up. “Sure!” he said, doing a great job not letting hesitancy show in his voice.

“Are you and Robert Smith still friends?!?!?” I blurted out in such a dork-alert manner that even my shadow was trying to disassociate itself from me.

He definitely seemed a little caught off guard by this question, I don’t know what he was expecting, lol. But he said, “I mean, we exchange little notes here and there.”

I then felt compelled to explain why I was asking, briefly mentioning the Coachella / Curiosa 2004 thing and maybe my hyper-awareness was making me blow this out of proportion, but he did seem to relax after learning why I was asking and TOLD ME A STORY ABOUT THE CURIOSA TOUR!

“I don’t know if you remember this, but the NY Times wrote a review about Curiosa at the time,” he started. He said that his mom had come to one of the shows and met Robert. “She was very goth then, looked very goth, too,” Geoff said. So when the NY Times was looking for a picture of Robert to use, they somehow found a picture that Robert had taken with Geoff’s mom and wrote, “Robert Smith and his wife” in the caption!

Geoff said he was like OMG and apologized to Robert who said, and here Geoff did an impeccable impersonation of Robert’s accent, “I should be so lucky, your mother is a lovely lady!”

LOVED THAT STORY SO MUCH!!!

By the time I returned to our table, I had been gone for quite a while and Henry was like *eyeball emoji*

“I was chatting with Geoff,” I shrugged in a douchey “no big deal” manner. “I asked him if he was still friends with Robert!” I squealed.

“Omg,” Henry mumbled.

This was just the first part of the evening! So memorable and heartwarming, revisiting these old days with Henry. (Who is way more accepting of all of the music, new and old FYI. I wore him down, guys.)