When we went to Chicago (specifically the Rosemont area, which is near the airport, F-Y-to-the-I) for the NCT Dream concert in 2023, we ate an early dinner at this vegan Korean place called Amitabul and when I say I still dream of this place…from the peaceful “om”s wafting down from the speakers, to the amicable Korean owner, and most importantly THE FRESH VEGGIE-LADEN FOOD. I was excited to stop by again before the NCT127 concert on Friday.

Dude, there are so many things to choose from, but I really don’t think you can go wrong. I got this delectable noodle dish and joined the Clean Plate Club – maybe a bit too fast, though. We both inhaled our food and ended up so stuffed, but not in a sickeningly way because this food is so healthy!

The only downside to this place is that since there is no music playing – just the “om”ing, and it was between lunch and dinner so aside from lone diner in the back and several people come in for take-out, it is QUIET.

Which means only one thing…

Henry’s mastication is amplified.

I tried to get a video to send to Chooch, who was born with the same aural affliction as me (actually, his was dormant until he learned about this on an episode of How I Met Your Mother and now he’s even worse than me about it) but Henry refused to chew until I put my phone down.

Jesus Christ, though – when he went back to eating it sounded like he was cutting down a forest with his molars.

The downside of eating such a filling meal was that we had NO ROOM for samples when we went to HMart afterward :( We did grab some snacks and samgak kimbap for later though.

And some hodu-gwaja! These are little cake-like balls filled with red bean and walnuts and made me so nostalgic for Korea. I mean, I always am anyway, but I was transported back as soon as I opened the bag. They were good but not as good as the ones I bought from a stand in the subway station by our hotel last year. Ugh and I got to order them in Korean too! I feel dumb doing that in America.

The next morning, we got up way early for some reason and went to Lost Larson before making our way home. Lost Larson is a Swedish-inspired cafe that has been on my list since our coaster vacation and played an integral part in why our August trip to Chicago for ATEEZ was so terrible because we didn’t get in to town in enough time to make it there and then drove out of the way to my back-up cafe where I had a legit emotional breakdown afterward and actually considered going to a hospital but then was worried about the bill.

All of that to say, we made it there this time! It was….cold and underwhelming. The vibe was not vibing. The coffee (I had it black) was mid. The pastries did not make me feel like I was back in Sweden and, for being pre-8AM, tasted day old.

Not impressed even a little bit. I know this is an entirely different country (but the pastries in all of Scandinavia and Finland just really hit), but the pastry we got FROM A GAS STATION IN NORWAY was a billion times better than whatever stale shit they plated for us – with absolute ambivalence, might I add – at Lost Larson.

Hate to be this person twice in one blog post (“I was in <x country> and it was better there” – you know that person lol) but I feel like even if I had no basis of comparison, I would have left this place feeling completely unsatisfied.

Which we both were.

My search for comparable Swedish pastries continues.

Luckily, our last memory of this trip to Chicago was a good one because DARK MATTER was a few blocks away!

Yooooo. You guys. I first had Dark Matter coffee in 2014 at Riot Fest. They had a booth set up there and I am ALWAYS CRAVING COFFEE but whoever goes to a concert or music festival where coffee is actually available?! Man, I loved it from the very first sip. The next year, they were set up again and I told them, like an eager puppy, that I’m from Pgh and that their coffee was one of my favorite things about Riot Fest, so they gave me a free t-shirt!

Honestly, great coffee and great people. You can’t beat that.

Hi, I’m channeling my dad again. God, I am such an old dad!!

Anyway, would you believe that of all the times we have gone to Chicago, this was our first time actually going to one of their storefronts?! I have even ordered bags from them online but have never set foot in a brick-and-mortar location. Well, that all has been rectified because not only did I get a bussin’ cup of coffee to go, but I also stocked up on some bags for home and got a can of their super potent cold coffee. Henry a/k/a Mr. Dunkin’ got nothing because he was a’scared. Poor little coffee poser.

As expected, the people working there were super chill and didn’t make me feel like I was wasting their time which, I’m sorry, you know that happens at some cafes!

My coffee was actually free since I bought two bags so that made me even happier. And then when I got back to the car and took my first sip, I basically screamed in caffeinated ecstasy, “IT TASTES LIKE RIOT FEST!”

I can’t explain it, but it brought back the stench of the muddy field, the joy-inducing blue sky, and the perfectly cozy chill in the air, and the clashing cacophony of multiple bands playing simultaneously on various stages. Ugh, Riot Fest used to be such a good time.

After that, we made our way out of town and started our drive home. Henry stopped at the very first rest area and got himself a big ol’ cup of sugary cold brew at Dunkin’ and was so smug about it too.

The moment the lights went out in the Chicago Theater, I knew I was cooked. Done for. Stick a fork in me, sir.

(Blog Post Interlude: Henry, being the respectful Kpop Dad that he is, was standing at first and then realized that the girl behind him was v. smol, so he apologized and remained seated for the whole concert. Sure, call him courteous, praise his nunchi, but I believe this was his excuse to sit and drink his beer while admiring Taemin’s abs in comfort.)

Taemin opened with Deja Vu and my heart was palpitating at dangerous levels. Taemin.

LEE TAEMIN.

!!!!

UNDER THE SAME ROOF AS ME!

This is from the Bangkok stop because I couldn’t find any good quality videos from Chicago, but this is a classic example of going from “liking a song” to “FUCKING OBSESSING OVER A SONG” after seeing it performed live. It expanded its real estate in my heart.

I have been struggling with how to effectively encapsulate the swirling feelings of this night into a blog post, but if you have ever seen one of your God Tier artists, you know how it is. It’s impossible. You just have to know that I was hyper-aware of the riotous thumping of my heart the whole entire night. The mask may have been stifling my maniacal screaming, but I was IN DEEP. I could not take my eyes off of him (except for when the broad in front of me would start to lean out of the aisle, forcing me to have to move into the aisle too – she was pissing me off so much because she HAD SO MUCH ROOM between her and the girl to her right and if she would have just fucking stood within the area of her actual seat, I would have had the perfect view that I paid for BUT WHATEVER. That was the only less than perfect part of the whole night.)

I just want to post ever live video from the concert that I can find but that would be ridiculous so I will just keep watching those on my own time and tell you that this one of the best nights of my life. Taemin is art in motion. I know he is not a machine but D A N G, I wish he would have performed for another 2 hours. It felt so short.

Set 1:

• • Intro video
• Deja Vu
• Guilty
• Advice
  • Ment 1
• Goodbye
• IDEA
• Heaven

Set 2: Ballads

• • VCR (Henry went and bought my shirt during this!)
• I’m Crying
• Clockwork (!!!!!!!!!! I never thought I would hear this live!!!!)
• Not Over You
  • Ment 2 (with snippets of a cappella fan-requested songs, including LOVE!!!!, Flame of Love, Pretty Boy – he gave Kai a shout out here, welcoming him back from the military!)
• The Unknown Sea
• Blue

Set 3:

• • VCR
  • Dance break with dancer intros (I thought this was so cool of him to give them props!)
• G.O.A.T.
• The Rizzness (!!!)
• Sexy In the Air
  • Ment 4
• Move (!!!!! LEGENDARY)
• Want
• Criminal (I died)
• Horizon

Fan-led Singalong organized by ChiWols – The Unknown Sea

ENCORE:

• Danger
• Crush
  • Ment 5
• Hypnosis
  • Ment 6
• Say Less

I started crying as I typed that last song, haha.

These pictures are trash because they’re basically just screenshots from my videos but I don’t care.

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I go to concerts fairly often but this was the first time in quite some time when I actually had friends texting me the next day, and messaging me when I got back to work, asking me how it was because they knew what a major deal this was for me, and that made it even more special.

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OH LORD HELP ME.

I was texting Chooch like a maniac during the VCRs and when we got back to the hotel.

“Yeah, but did he even glance* at you?” he asked because he is such a little bastard lol.

*(I tried so hard to get VIP for the opportunity to “make eye contact” with Taemin, literally that was how one of the perks was described, and Chooch thought it was the funniest thing ever that 1. I was willing to pay $250 for this perk and that 2. VIP packages sold out in seconds.)

Songs I would have given up my blood to hear live:

• Love (he did sing a verse!)
• Rise
• Nemo
• Press Your Number
• Artistic Groove

But honestly, he could have sung nursery rhymes to us all night and I would have been happy.

And then the lights came on. I did not want to leave. :(

All I remember after this was walking back to the hotel in a daze, then being body-slammed by adrenaline and unable to fall asleep. I just lay there in bed, watching the video snippets I took on my phone, “Friends” playing on the hotel TV as is hotel tradition for us, feeling this insane mix of euphoria and a deep aching, which of course would grow legs by the next day and turn into full-fledged post-show depression.

On the drive home (which was actually pleasant, no fighting!) I just kept whispering, “I can’t believe we saw Taemin. He is so perfect. DID YOU SEE HOW PERFECT HE IS??”

My favorite part about him is his divine duality – when he is performing, he is this dark, sultry angel telling a story with every move he makes. right down to the intentional flexing of his fingers. No move is wasted, even the slightest twitch of his elbow matters. But then the music stops and he is LEE TAEMIN-AH, exuding precious innocence, being a dork, mocking us and himself – I can’t stand him, lol!

Ugh, it was so good. Taemin is a living legend and if you don’t know him by now, why?!

Our hotel (StayPineapple!) was a block away from The Chicago Theater and I kept looking out the window to see if people were lining up yet. There was a scary moment around 5PM when a bunch of firetrucks rolled up with their sirens on and parked directly across from the theater. I was like, “I SWEAR TO GOD, IF TAEMIN IS IN A BURNING BUILDING…..” but then they went into the building across from the theater. I don’t know what was happening but there didn’t appear to be a fire anywhere and hopefully it was nothing serious.

Yo, I was sooo paranoid and superstitious about this concert. Like, Lord just let me see Taemin tonight, Amen.

We left the hotel around 6 – doors were supposed to open at 6:30 and I wanted to have some time to pass out my freebies to my fellow Taemates. Dude, that took all of 10 minutes. My pins were gobbled up so quickly! It was fun getting to have some interactions with people in line and trading freebies with other people who also brought stuff – I got some fun bracelets :) And Henry, my placeholder in line, was also accumulating some swag for me too, what a dork lol.

I just want to say that this theater’s staff and security were so efficient with getting us inside quickly and safely. They had a side entrance opened as well so we were herded into that line, which then split into more lines for the security check points. Isn’t it sad that this is the world we live in, where we have to be searched before entering a theater? I’ve been thinking about that a lot lately, especially after seeing Ollie Wride at the Crafthouse where we walked right in and I can’t remember the last time I went to a concert where we could just “walk right in.”

Anyway though, it’s usually pretty quick with kpop concerts because these people know what not to have on their person but of course we managed to pick the ONE LINE that had the slug-slow security agent sifting through every item in every bag. Meanwhile, I WAS SO SICK TO MY STOMACH WITH PRE-TAEMIN JITTERS. I was so ready to see him / no, I’m not ready / OMG I can’t wait to see him / no, this isn’t real, I’m going to puke.

And so on and so forth, the internal angst went.

Once we were inside, it was mayhem. First order of business was merch procuring. This theater was not made for Kpop, lol. The merch line wrapped all the way down the first floor and up the steps to the balcony level, so Henry said he’d take one of the team and go back out to snag me a shirt during one of the VCRs — that’s the part of the concert where the artist/group leaves the stage to do a wardrobe change and pre-recorded videos play. To this day, the ones at the Winner concert in 2019 were the best because they were hilarious skits.

Our seats were OK. I can’t complain because I was able to get in as soon as they went on sale, managed to buy two before it sold out / went to premium prices. I want to say it was around $150 a seat, and almost immediately after that, all of the seats around our that were still available were triple that price. Fucking Ticketmaster. This whole tour was such a ticketing cluster. So many people missed out because they couldn’t afford the resale prices which of course dropped significantly days before the show (for the LA one at least, so I hear) but when so many people have to travel for Kpop concerts, it was gut-wrenching to see the disappointment in fans who just couldn’t viably drop everything and make that trip with less than a week’s notice.

I really fucking hate you, Ticketmaster.

Henry immediately left his seat to go to the bathroom and told me later that when he went to get my shirt, he wanted to use the bathroom again but the staff apparently realized that there were way more women there than men so they closed the mens rooms on the first floor and Henry had to go all the way upstairs to find an open one, lol. Anyway, he came back with this beer and it was pretty good! I was excited to post it on Untappd, haha.

He also got POPCORN for some idiotic reason (YOU DON’T EAT POPCORN AT A TAEMIN CONCERT HENRY) and this is him masticating his moustache into a twist while I attempted to take our picture. Ugh. Also, I wore a mask through the whole concert because I was on the tail end of a nearly two week illness and didn’t want to infect any fellow Taemin fans. I was also concerned for Taemin’s health too because I kept hearing about how many different flus and viruses were going around at the time, how it was the worst flu season we’ve had in decades, and all I kept thinking about was how now Taemin was here in the land of anti-vaxxers and mask-haters, and he was doing some VIP group pictures with fans. I really hope he was able to stay healthy and uninfected while he was here in fucking Dumberica.

This theater was so beautiful! And matched Taemin’s majestic aura.

The fans were a wide range of ages and ethnicities, and I will say that there were more men there than I have seen at most Kpop concerts. (Most of them were there with female counterparts but most of them seemed to also be fans, like Henry!)

Since doors opened earlier than 6:30, we ended up having to sit there for an hour waiting, and I will tell you that it was fucking FREEZING in that theater. Plus, I was wearing a thin blouse that billowed and fanned me every time someone walked by. And my legs wouldn’t stop shaking because of N E R V E S so Henry kept putting his hand on my knee to make me stop but I was sincerely about to catapult myself right out of my seat and through the ceiling, into the midwestern sky. It was really like that, I’m not exaggerating. The anticipation, the constant checking my phone for the time, trying to distract myself by texting Chooch who of course was just like “mm cool,” being annoyed by Captain Popcorn. It was all too much.

But then, finally, 7:30PM came and the lights went out…

I am still collecting my thoughts on the Taemin concert so I can spew them all over this page like pea soup from Regan’s mouth but I wanted to post this picture that Henry took of me pre-concert in our hotel room with the Chicago Theater behind me because I never want to forget how I felt in that moment: the pre-concert jitters but also pure happiness and that has been such a rare feeling for me lately. I mean, look at all the whining I do here weekly – you know!

But sheesh – not only did it feel so good to be out and about after being sick, but I just FELT good too. I wasn’t worried about how I looked. I wasn’t depriving myself of food that day. I had some beer! I was..living. To put it bluntly. Living.

It was so cold that night in Chicago but I felt sincerely warm.

I still can’t believe we saw THEE 이 태민. Grateful for the opportunity and privilege to make the trek to Chicago for this beautiful, special, majestic night under the same roof as the most ethereal dancer and angelic singer I have ever known in my lifetime

You guys, we were staying right down the street from the Bean and even though we have seen it several times before I thought that maybe, on a frigid Monday morning, there might not be crowds so we walked on over.

Had we been ONE MINUTE FASTER we’d have beaten this one couple who arrived seconds before us and proceeded to do an entire amateur photoshoot and I was trying to be polite and not get in their way but also, COME ON.

We stayed to the side for awhile and then finally when they were, readjusting or something, regrouping, discussing the next series of poses, who the fuck knows, I ran over and was able to have Henry take one picture of me quickly.

We were going to leave after that but I was like NO I WANT ONE TOGETHER THIS IS RIDICULOUS.

So I interrupted them and asked if they would take one of us together. The lady of the couple agreed and proceeded to take some very bizarre and unpopular angles, not once getting the whole Bean, and then I had to crop her fingers out of every shot.

Also, she somehow TURNED OFF LIVE so our “jumping shot” looks like this:

But whatever, I can’t complain too much because it was a nice to experience the Bean without throngs of people duck-facing it up.

She did take this “behind the scenes” video though so I guess there’s that lol.

Now my toes are frozen and we’re on our way home. I miss Taemin with my whole fucking heart in case you were wondering.

You guys. I never thought I would say this, as someone who was so firmly mired in the post-hardcore / Warped Tour / goth scene for so many years, but Henry and I attended the IHeartRadio Jingle Ball in Detroit and had a fantastic time!

Granted, we only went because not only was NCT Dream performing with Renjun who has returned from hiatus (he sat out the US tour they recently did in September and he is my Dream bias, so I was bummed about that) but Wonho, formerly of Monsta X and currently a fabulous solo artist was also going to be there! His first time in the US without Monsta X! Henry knew before I even told him that we were going to be attending our first Jingle Ball because of this.

Aside from Jason Derulo, I didn’t know any of the western artists on the Detroit line up (the line up varies by cities and we very luckily dodged a MEGHAN TRAINOR bullet, as she is appearing at several of the dates) but I didn’t care. I figured we’d stay for Wonho and NCT Dream and then leave.

But then, we were having such a good time, our seats were fantastic, there were no apparent dickheads around us, so I decided that we should stay for the whole thing. We paid enough $$$ for the seats, and if we left early, we’d probably just end up sitting in the hotel room watching Friends reruns.

I will write about Wonho and NCT Dream separately. In this post, I want to just talk about the other artists and how, while a bit of a culture shock to see western pop artists perform (LOL culture shock like I’m not actually American, I’m so fucking annoying even to myself, don’t worry guys – we share the same opinion about this blogger).

The lineup, in order from opening to headliner:

1. Isabel LaRosa
2. Wonho <3
3. Madison Beer
4. NCT Dream <3
5. Jason Derulo
6. Saweetie
7. Teddy Swims
8. Jack Harlow

First of all, the show stared PROMPTLY at 7:30. It was actually borderline jarring because the lights went out and then Isabel walked on stage to the backdrop of thumping bass. I thought this would be like K-Con where there’d be an MC or something that came out first to do their spiel. They did in fact have the local Top 40 radio DJs there, but they came out after Isabel’s set, which…I honestly thoroughly enjoyed. It was definitely giving “sex scene in a student-made horror film that we would have rented from Incredibly Strange Video circa 2002”, that is to say: SEEDY, SLEAZY, CREEPY.

At one point, her hockey jersey came off and she performed the rest of her 4 song set in just a tiny bra and shorts. It was something.

She has a song about “wanting someone older” and the music video for it played on the screen behind her. It of course showed her at a school and her costar was A TEACHER.

“It’s your favorite trope,” I shouted in Henry’s ear and he frowned so hard. He hated all the inappropriate, statutory rapey relationships that peppered the TV series Pretty Little Liars, which we used to watch together, particularly a main story line that involved one of the Liars and her ENGLISH TEACHER. Hooo boy, did that boil Henry’s blood, lol.

(Speaking of, the English teacher was recently in a Netflix Christmas movie with Lindsay Lohan and his girlfriend in that movie was also much younger and there were some “jokes” about that which made Henry frown in disappointment all over again haha.)

Also, I really liked that it was just her and her guitarist on stage. It was minimalistic and somehow still so loud and unnerving.

The more I thought about in the days after Jingle Ball, the more I realized how much I liked this (???) and that it sort of reminded me of the metal-adjacent female-fronted stuff I used to listen to in the early 00s.

Then came Madison Beer after Wonho. I knew A LITTLE about her, like the fact that Justin Bieber made her go viral when she was just 13 and he reposted a video of her singing. And that she was one of the voices for some League of Legends virtual group called K/DA, along with some other broad and two of the (G)-Idle members. So, she’s played a minor role in the kpop realm!

I was SHOCKED by her though because she clearly can SANG and her voice actually had somewhat of an old-fashioned sound to it that I truly appreciated because I’m so tired of these pop girls singing in their fake breathy baby voices a la Halsey.

Did she make me uncomfortable at times? Oh, you know it. Her performance was also sexually-charged but I guess that’s just always been the nature of American pop and I’m so out of the loop that it was like sugar shock.

I guess this song was nominated for a Grammy. I REALLY liked it live, but then later when I watched the video, I didn’t like it as much. But it really works so well as a live performance – I had never heard the song before but when it started, I was fully invested and borderline obsessed. It was dark and thumpy.

I do really appreciate the Jennifer’s Body theme of the music video though, and Jesus Christ she could be Megan Fox’s sister, seriously.

I don’t think Jason Derulo needs any intro! I was seriously shocked that he wasn’t headlining though, because out of everyone, he’s been around the longest and is arguably the most well-known. His set was really energetic and dance-y, and he did a medley of some of his most popular songs too since everyone was really only allotted enough time  to perform 4 songs – he found the loophole lol.

It was during this set though when it occurred to me that it really felt like being in a giant strip club – all of the performances so far (with the exception of NCT Dream, but also even Wonho to an extent lol) were just like living, gyrating, pelvic thrusting billboards for SEX! SEX! SEX! and the only thing missing was poles, honestly. It was entertaining but I think I am officially of the age where I was thankful I didn’t have a young kid in attendance with me.

I’m pretty sure a large portion of the crowd left after Jason.

Then came Saweetie. I didn’t take any pictures of her and my review will be short & s(a)weet(ie):

She is SO BEAUTIFUL. She looked amazing in her adorable little Christmas outfit.

Her DJ was repetitive and annoying.

I guess this is what girl rap sounds like now? Sort of….not rapping, no flow? I was bored with her set (when she was pretending to straddle and ride an imaginary “Big big Santa” was pretty fun though haha) – I grew up on DaBrat and Foxxy Brown so that’s my bar, I guess. Again, just basing this on what I saw that night – I haven’t listened to her in any other context aside from the song she did with IVE last year (which is the only reason I even know who she is).

Teddy Swims was really good but I could never sit through an entire concert of his, I don’t think. All of his songs blended together and I couldn’t stop laughing because he reminded me so much of Christina.

Also, and this pains me to admit but I said it out loud later that night when we were walking back to the hotel, but I still think that the best male singer in North America, maybe even all of the western world, is fucking Jonny Craig. UGH. This Teddy Swims guy has A Voice, but he’s no Jonny Craig. It’s sad because if Jonny hadn’t made such poor life decisions, he could be a household name at this point and not still playing at tiny hole in the wall clubs in his 40s.

But yeah, enjoyed Teddy Swims more than I expected (when I looked up him prior to this and saw the genres he was known for, I scoffed, “YEAH NO I’M NOT GONNA LIKE THIS DOUCHEBAG.”) and at least I can admit this!?

Jack Harlow – whose name I knew but knew nothing else – was the last to perform. He came strutting out on stage alone in chinos and a fucking fitted black sweater like he just left his cubicle in the IT Dept. And then he started….rapping? Is that what that was? I have no idea but all I could think was, “Who the fuck is this white nerd?” You guys, I didn’t like him at all. Henry didn’t either. We were both pulling stank-face until I threw in the towel after two….songs? Whatever you want to call it. I turned to Henry and said, “Yeah, I’m ready to go if you are” and he was like, “TWIST MY ARM” as he practically pushed me out of my seat and into the aisle in his eagerness to never have to hear Jack Harlow again.

(When we were walking up the steps to leave our section, Jack was in the middle of talking to the audience and even that was getting on my nerves. “Oh boy and he’s a talker,” I mumbled and Henry made the “Pffft” sound in agreement with me because Henry always agrees with me unless I‘m pulling a runner at the eye doctor and then suddenly he’s dying on the Bittel Vision hill.)

We had a pleasant walk back to the hotel – there were cops at every intersection so we felt safe to be walking the several blocks back rather than take the hotel shuttle which Henry asked SO MANY QUESTIONS ABOUT at the hotel for us to just not bother using it lololol. Then we hit up the vending machines before going back to the room and I was SHOCKED that there was nary a Faygo in sight. Detroit!!

Oh, we also walked around the casino a few times because I thought I had seen a sign for gelato in one of our earlier strolls and it made me laugh that we had made at least 4 laps around the whole casino throughout the day and didn’t even consider to pull a lever on a machine. My brother Ryan, a huge Vegas aficionado, would have SHUDDERED TO THINK.

Henry, first thing this morning in the hotel: Are you watching the videos you took from last night?

Me: ofc

——

Roadtrip food interlude! I would remiss to not give the vegetarian restaurant we ate at this morning a shout-out in its own post. Henry found this place when he was looking for nearby H-Marts in the Detroit area (we are still trying to build up a k-beer stock for Chingumas, so annoying like a treasure hunt).

Even the name – Spacecat V-stro – is fun!

Full transparency, I originally found myself hovering above the DANGER ZONE which is where I am hyper-focusing on stupid shit – did I gain weight, do I look ugly, should I start a fight, should I punish myself? Why am I like this. I came so close to being like, “just forget the original plan, let’s just go home.”

But I fought with myself quietly behind the scenes (i.e. in my head) and just kept my big mouth shut so that we could just for once have a good morning. I know I’m difficult. I can’t always control it but if I can, I will. OK?? Leave me alone.

Spacecat can be found on a really cool, Pride flag-prominent street in Ferndale, also in good company with cozy-looking bars that probably have beers I can actually enjoy unlike Harry’s, indie gift shops, and a plant store that I would have popped into if it was open.

We also had a pleasant encounter on the sidewalk with a doctor (HE WAS WEARING A DOCTOR COAT; maybe he was a doctor for Halloween and really grew attached to the jacket but I really feel like he was a legit doctor guys, so stop asking me questions about it) regarding the hours of street parking while Henry was trying to download the parking app. I tried to point out that it said right on the parking kiosk that parking was 11am-12am or something but no one listened to me and it was just like the time Henry and I went to this haunted adventure trail where we ended up losing because Henry and some other cis white male ignored me and my correct solutions to the quests but it’s not like that happened in 2003 and I still dwell on it 21 years later because that wouldn’t be like me at all.

Anyway, it was 8:45am when we eventually went inside while Henry was still fussing with the parking app. There was only one person there – presumably the owner – and she greeted us so casually yet warmly as though expecting us, and I immediately knew it was going to be a good experience.

She told us to have a seat anywhere and then asked with a friendly eye brow raise, “You ready for some coffee?”

BET.

Most of the artwork was CATS. Fully my style. And the soundtrack was a great retro punk mix.

When the Spacecat lady came over with coffee and menus, she noticed Henry struggling with the parking app and said, “oh you don’t need to worry about that until 11!”

Mmmmmmm. YA DONT SAY, HENRY.

Now, about that menu! It’s almost predominately vegan but they DO bill themselves as a vegetarian restaurant because some of the things do have eggs/dairy. Others are naturally vegan, and then the rest have the option to swap out dairy cheese with vegan cheese.

I like their transparency!

I also like that all of their protein is made in-house, so no Impossible or Beyond products being used there. I appreciated this because I feel like it’s a cop-out to just add some toppings to an Impossible patty and then charge $20. Granted, I think Impossible burgers are delicious but I almost never order them while out because they kill my stomach and make me feel overstuffed.

Even the chik’n here was housemade with tofu, similar to how Zenith makes their tofishy sandwiches. I came so close to getting one of the chicken sandwiches (yes, it was 9am but who cares) but ultimately Henry ordered the chk’n and waffles so I just stole some off his plate – it was DIVINE. Henry, an avid disliker of tofu, fully approved of how the tofu had transformed into fried chicken.

And as for me, I was torn between several items on the brunch menu and the weekly grilled cheese special, but ultimately asked our Spacecat tour guide what their favorite of the two veggie burgers was. She steered me toward the Red Dwarf because it has “more going on” as opposed to the other burger option which was a more traditional patty melt. I also opted for the vegan cheese.

It was HEAVENLY. SPACEY even. The party was made from beets (and quinoa I think) and carrot “bacon” and the most deliciously tangy homemade sauce. I got it with a side of warm garlic kale and I could not have been more satisfied. It left me feeling full but not gross and bloated.

This food is made with love (they’re actually closed on Mondays and Tuesdays to make all of the food for the week) and even though it was nutritious, it still had that “restaurant cheat meal” edge to it.

Even Henry was raving about how much he enjoyed it.

And again, while I would have given this place a solid thumbs up regardless, the way the owner (?) was so down to earth and genuinely interested in where we were from, what brought us to Detroit, what the veg scene is like in Pgh – it just made it so much more memorable. I’m sure we will be back at some point to visit Jessi and Bill and when that happens, I am making them go there with us!

This just really set the tone for the day, in the most positive way possible. Literally the rest of the day – hunting for Korean beer at HMart, stopping at Biggby for coffee, and just being in the car together as we made our way back home – was so enjoyable and pleasant. No complaints. I can’t say that every often!

I didn’t feel like liveblogging and also Henry and I were listening to an audiobook like the lamest empty nesters who ever emptied their nest BUT we just stopped for lunch at a cute vegan spot called ROOTED VEGAN in a small Indiana town called ANGOLA. Props to me for finding it – Henry continues to do fuck all on the food finding front.

Ok first of all, the woman behind the counter was friendly and patient while Henry squinted at the menu behind her and bristled his moustache like it’s a facial Magic 8 Ball ready to choose his food for him.

I got the bakn chikn wrap and Henry got the Nashville chikn wrap – I fucking BEASTED mine. It was just what I wanted and now I’m full but not painfully so, and will probably be able to skip dinner so yay for that because I always panic about eating before a concert!!

We also got a lemon crinkle cookie and a chocolate cookie sandwich straight PUMPED with pumpkin frosting. Hoooooboy it was rich and decadent and that nearly pushed me over the edge but then we went for a stroll around the cutie courtyard/square area before getting back in the car so that helped.

Dude, that car/truck thing.

This place was so cutie!

After I took this picture of Sojouner Truth, some young guy in a BURNT UMBER hoodie and disheveled ginger hair stopped by and said, “That guy was a pedo.” He was pointing to another statue, and I felt like I needed to take a picture of it so as I walked over, he followed me and said, “Yeah he was gay but it was the 1800s so he couldn’t really do anything about it you know.”

I said something along the lines of “ya don’t say” but like, less 1950s and more modern times.

The Angola Pedo.

Then he continued along his way, stopping at each business and handing out a paper of unknown subject matter.

“Wow, I basically got a tour,” I said and Henry laughed REALLY HARD which disgusted me because it wasn’t funny at all.

IT’S BEEN REAL, ANGOLA.

P.S. I just went back and looked at that statue and that dude died in 1790-something so that guy gave me FAKE NEWS.

*except that I was with Henry so define ‘shenanigans.’

We left the house bright and early Saturday morning for our drive to Long Island. I was excited because while we have been to NYC, we’ve never been to Long Island and I like going to new places. I had been researching vegan places to eat at before the show and had it whittled down to one winner, so I was excited about that too!

Surprisingly, the drive was pretty calm. I wasn’t being a raging asshole like I have been for the last several months. I felt calm (with an underlying sense of OMG NCT DREAM rippling through my nervous system) and we didn’t fight at all. I even kept my wedding band on!

At one of many rest stops. I just wanted to get a picture in my Renjun shirt! (It was already announced last month that Renjun would be continuing his health hiatus and not joining the Dreamies for the US leg of their tour. Of course, I was heartbroken over this because everyone knows he is my Dream bias but I am also glad that he was given the option and did what he felt was right for him at the same. I’m not sure what his current standing is but he seemed to really be going through mental and emotional duress last spring and I just really hope he has been getting the help he needs and that he is being kind and gentle with himself. I worry about him so much. :(

The first half of the drive was spent finishing a book – The Clinic, it was just “OK.” Actually, it was kind of stupid, I lied. Literally nothing notable happened. I had avocado toast for breakfast from Dunkin’ (I know, don’t hate me for being so fucking fancy) and then later, veggie wrap from Sheetz. Henry really knows how to wine and dine a bitch.

But then once we reached the end of NJ and started seeing signs for THE GEORGE WASHINGTON BRIDGE, things got livelier. And by that, I mean that we hit grid-locked traffic and it took us 45 minutes just to get on the bridge. Henry was flipping out but everyone around us seemed calm like this was normal, but Henry was like, “WHAT ARE THOSE CARS UP THERE DOING?? ARE THEY CREATING THEIR OWN LANE?? THEY CAN’T DO THAT!” OK, highway patrol, calm down.

NYC! No time to mess around there, sadly.

I loved this NY Welcome sign so much. We have never driven into NYC before – always taken the train from either Newark or Jersey City so this was all new. I FELT LIKE A DISNEY PRINCESS. A WHOLE NEW WORLD BRIDGE.

We had several hours to kill once we got to Long Island and, after driving past UBS Arena and seeing the line of NCTzens that had already formed which got my heart racing a bit, we went straight to the vegan spot du jour – Toma-Tis. It’s vegan Caribbean cuisine! 

I’m just going to copy my Yelp review after this part, but I want to first talk about how relaxed and friendly the whole ordering process was. We were greeted by a super friendly lady who didn’t rush us – she was all smiles and didn’t make us feel like interlopers like sometimes will happen at vegan places, ugh. The pretension can be off the charts at times. But not here!

We placed our orders and then sat at a table by the window to wait. A woman who I assume is the owner came out front and started chatting with us – LOVED HER. We had a nice chat about being plant based and she was impressed that Henry, who still eats meat, cooks vegetarian / vegan food for me. And she and I both eschewed meat for the same reason – we didn’t like how our mothers cooked meat!

My favorite part was when the restaurant’s phone rang and it was a young kid calling from Jamaica! She kept saying, “Where’s your mother? Put your mother on the phone.” I guess he hung up and she goes, “That was a young kid calling from Jamaica!” and then she went in the back to tell the women in the kitchen too. LOL.

Then she asked where we’re from since I said we were traveling and I told her that we had come here from Pgh for a concert at UBS and she said, “Oh! You’re here for that concert?!” so I guess she knew about it!

NO WAIT I LIED. My favorite part was actually when she was asking us if we’ve ever had Jamaican food before. We said no (closest I would say is ShadoBeni here in Pgh which is vegan Trinidadian cuisine) and she exclaimed, “Oh my god! And this will be your first! What made you come here??” and I told her that we’re always looking for local vegan places when we’re traveling and this place stuck out to me when I saw it on Google. (“Thank you, Google!” she said.) She asked me if I ordered the jerk “chicken” and after I told her what I had ordered, one of the other ladies said, “He’s the jerk,” and pointed to Henry as she caught herself. “Oh no,  that’s not what I meant! I meant he ordered the jerk! I’m so sorry!” but we were all cracking up so bad and I kept saying, “No, it’s true, he is the jerk!” It was so funny.

YOU HAD TO BE THERE OK. YOU WOULDN’T UNDERSTAND.

Anyway, the owner told me to call her and let her know what I thought and I was going to do except that I am averse to phone calls so I did one better and left a thorough review on Yelp and Google. :)

I was just as excited to come here as I was for the concert!

First of all, the service was SO PERSONAL. Everyone there was so friendly, chatting with us about veganism, etc. The owner especially was so sweet and made us feel like we were really being taken care of.

We didn’t want to go crazy with ordering since we were going to be going to a concert right after and tried to order light by sharing the jerk chicken sandwich, a pumpkin patty and a jackfruit/chickpea patty, cassava fries, and a slice of pie which I think they said was some type of potato “pudding”?

Everything was so delicious, substantial, and satisfying! The cassava fries were light and not greasy at all but still had so much unique flavor, I was swooning over them!

The jerk chicken was out of this world and I regret not getting a whole one for myself! The seasoning, the crisp of the “chicken,” even the bread it was on was perfect.

Both patties were warm and savory, a perfect handheld snack. AND THAT PIE! Unlike anything I have ever eaten – it was just the right amount of sweet, loaded with spices and flavor, dense and chewy. One of those things that you eat and then can’t stop thinking about. We had half of it saved and I’m not going to lie – I thought about it a few times during the concert and then immediately dug into it in the car afterward!

I don’t want to come back here, I NEED to come back. The menu is so extensive, and I want to try some of the entrees – hoe many places do you know that serve vegan oxtail?? I need to try it.

I am so happy that we found Toma-Tis and I will be recommending it to all of my friends, vegan or not! (FWIW, Henry is not vegan and he devoured everything happily!)

pumpkin patty!

We drove a few minutes down the street to some state park (Valley Stream State Park – there, I’m a good blogger and I checked the geotag on my photos, HAPPY?) and stuffed our fucking faces at a picnic table while numerous family picnics were going on around us. It was F E S T I V E. Music was playing, people were grilling, a middle-aged Black dad was doing the cabbage patch and I wanted to join their party bigly. It was a lively park!

The picture does not do it justice but this is the jerk chicken sandwich that Henry split with me. It was so satisfying right down to the bread it was on. RegERT not getting my own, you know that’s right.

I really think the cassava fries were my favorite though! They were so light, not greasy at all, and the texture – well, if you’ve had anything made with cassava then you know, but it’s so pleasing. I don’t know what the sauce was – it was thick, creamy, and had a slight spicy tang to it. Made the cassava fries that much better which I didn’t think was possible!

THIS EFFING PIE! Just looking at it gave me a tastebud flashback in the best way possible. It was unlike anything I’ve ever tried. It had a very distinct spice that was definitely dominating the rest of the flavs – Henry said he thought it was nutmeg. Whatever it was, it left a very enjoyable aftertaste in my mouth that kept this pie on my mind for some time. We only ate half of it between us because it was so dense, and I would be lying if I said I wasn’t craving it here and there during the concert later. (Yes, I ate some in the car on the way to the hotel afterward, LOL.)

After we ate, we had a really nice stroll around the park because:

1. I needed to get my 10,000 steps;
2. IT’S CALLED “NEEDING TO DIGEST,” MY FRIENDS.

This park was so nice and wooded! We saw many Mr. Gray Guys, and even a Cousin Bun Bun:

We left around 6pm to head back to UBS Area and begin what would become one of the best nights of 2024 (I mean, that’s not a hard title to take since this year has sucked so hard, but still!).

9:21am: Yo! It is Sunday morning, the day after NCT Dream and I am in that weird limbo state of being both happy and also having post-concert depression which I have to say hits different as a Kpop Stan. I have gone through many phases of music so I can say this with confidence and as if I have a PhD in these matters of the heart. We stayed at some Marriott in Cranbury, NJ after the original hotel in Wood-something NJ canceled the reservation during the concert last night so Henry had to scramble – RUDE! And then they still charged him so he had to fight with them while I was sleeping I guess to get our money back. (He did.)

Now we are stopping at Dunkin’ and heading out to Philly to give Chooch his TV and other crap he either forgot or wasn’t immediately needed last weekend. We drive a Kona so we couldn’t fit everything in one trip and knew we’d back out this way the next weekend much to Chooch’s delight lol.

Yesterday was pretty great, I have to say. Henry and I didn’t fight and I didn’t have any bad feelings and then we had amazing vegan food and saw NCT DREAM and for the first time since Bambi died, I almost feel like it’s going to be ok except that now I am crying because I mentioned her so…maybe some more time is needed haha 😩.

10:31am: we’re in Philly but Chooch just woke up and isn’t ready for us yet. Typical.

11:24am: Hilariously, we are now at Choochs dorm and Henry went to go park the car after unloading everything but then I couldn’t get into the dorm because I left my wallet at home and have no ID lllolol. I told the girl at the desk that I am the most irresponsible adult ever and she laughed in a way that said “don’t talk to me.” ;)

Anyway, now we’re waiting for Chooch to come back down so we can go get lunch I guess, I have no idea but I’m sad bc I was counting on using the bathroom in the dorm and now I have to hold it for the unforeseeable future.

11:45am :)

Guy in front of just licked Cheetos dust off his small child’s fingers and I almost vomited.

12:06pm: At Reading Terminal Market!

Henry spiraling out at the options. Sadly, the pretzel place was closed because Amish / Sunday. Luckily, we were aware of this in advance so there were no sudden disappointments to be had.

Stoked to have his photo taken again while he’s eating! It’s what MUM is best at.

Chooch and I got vegan deli sandwiches from LUHVS Deli – Chooch’s is the cubano and mine is corned beef. Obsessed. I loved the bread on mine especially. Chooch ate here earlier in the week and sent me a picture and said “I will take you here” and then when I asked him to take me there today he was like UGH FINE – wtf.

I don’t know what meaty thing Henry got but he also got ube fries!

This was so much fun and we actually didn’t fight!!

1:19pm: Now we’re at the art festival in Rittenhouse Square and this is chooch’s third and he apparently knows some of the artists at this point.

chooch and one of his artist friends who just exclaimed HEY YOURE BACK!

Apparently this guy’s roommate is from Pgh. Chooch is really making the rounds.

2:45pm: stopped for overpriced lattes at Le Pain Quotien and then some guy who has a table set up with a COME CHAT WITH ME sign interrupted a convo he was having with a young couple to tell me, “I just love your purse! I wanted to say it when you walked past before too” and then the couple sitting with him were like OMG and chooch was like WHY DOES EVERYONE LIKE THAT DUMB PURSE AND NOT MY CROCS?!” Also a man at 4th St Cookies also liked it!!!

You guys why am I loving this dumb rival city so much.

2:58pm: Chooch is taking us on the trolley for the first time!

3:04pm: Henry being obsessed with mastering a new public transit thingie now:

3:23pm: OK we just walked him back to his dorm and said goodbye and I am ok!! He even said “wow why were you sadder last week?” And I said, “because I realized now that I will be back to visit often so I’m ok” and he said “no. You won’t.” This is my new fave city, guys!

4:30pm: Stopped at a rest area and when Henry was collecting trash to throw out he “spilled Red Bull” on himself and when I saw it I burst out laughing and said, “I am NOT walking in there with you” while he was looking for pants to change into.

“Just go, asshole!” he said, as he was still getting the garbage (and the can of alleged Red Bull offender) together.

LOL I was cracking up alone on my walk through the parking lot so who looks more embarrassing, really.

4:44pm: Still at this fucking rest stop because Henry not only had to change pants but also “GO TO THE BATHROOM” aka POOP and now we’re waiting for our coffee. He tried to hold my hand and I said, “Ew people probably think you trafficked me, get off.”

4:49pm: On the way out, Henry said that not only did he have to change but he also had to TAKE OFF HIS UNDERWEAR bc they too were wet and he didn’t have an extra pair to change into!!!! I AM SO DEAD.

Meanwhile, an old man & youngish girl got out of a car and Henry said, “Did she get out of the backseat?”

“Maybe she’s being trafficked too. DO YOU KNOW THAT GUY? Is he a part of the same RING as you?”

But then as we drive past we saw that an older lady was in the passenger seat so I guess the more plausible explanation is that was a dad and daughter. Stand down.

6:56pm: Nothing cool or exciting has happened since my last check-in aside from me ranting about racist Americans and Karens complaining about people dancing at concerts.

7:45pm: An hour left. My throat hurts from last night. I’m calling this live blog. PISSSSSS OUT.

I can’t remember how much I mentioned in my quick post from Friday and don’t feel like looking but I can tell you in a nutshell that Friday was a whirlwind of emotions even though the Actual Day of Dread was Saturday. I think I was so focused on having “a good, perf day” that I got in my head and way too in my feelings and actually made myself sick and miserable off and on for the whole day (also Henry’s presence in general exacerbated my bad mood but that is a whole other that we don’t care to get into now, right?).

We left the house around 8am and after making what felt like a zillion stops along the way, got to Drexel around 2pm I think? The plan was to go to the bookstore and get that financial damage out of the way and just sort of get the lay of the land. When we were there last April, Chooch hadn’t committed yet so this time it was for real. AND I NEEDED A PICTURE OF HIM WITH MARIO THE DRAGON STATUE! He refused to indulge me in April but now that he’s an actual Drexel student, I think he realizes that there were certain bones he has to throw to mom during these fragile times.

WOMAN. ON. THE. EDGE.

I really like that he chose a college in a big(ish) city. He will never be bored, that’s for sure! We have been to Philly a generous handful of times at this point and have barely scratched the surface so while I’m sad that he will be 5 hours from home, I’m excited to have a reason to get to know Pittsburgh’s rival city in greater depth! (I will say right now that my greatest takeaway after this particular visit is that the stench of pot is so strong here that it’s like it permeated the lining of nostrils because I cannot shake that scent, 24 hours later.)

After sorting out the textbook sitch, we walked to Hip City Veg which was a much farther walk than Henry had advertised and I was HONGRY so this was not ideal. I somehow managed to keep the Big Fits tucked away for future use though and only dealt a moderate verbal evisceration.

Anyway!!! I had wanted to check out Hip City Veg for a bit so I was stoked to finally be there and that there’s a location near the Drexel campus (we could have been lazy and taken the subway – I think they call it the L in Philly – one stop so I will keep this in mind for next time). With all the veg-friendly dining options in University City alone, PLUS the great dining plan he’s on at Drexel, Chooch better never tell me he’s hungry.

Henry got the vegan cheesesteak which made me LOL because Megan’s bf Eric wrote a list of cheesesteak recs in Chooch’s grad party guest book even though Megan was like, “Eric, he doesn’t eat meat!” and then the one who DOES eat meat got a vegan one! Anyway, he let me try it and it was OK.

I got the grilled fake chicken baddie and it was DELECTABLE but also made my stomach REVOLT. I need to get tested for food allergies. I have a sneaking suspicion that I have a moderate gluten thing going on, either that or I just have my stomach so trained to not want to accept anything other than protein shakes and PB toast and other bland pantry staples like saltines. My current diet is so nursing home bad that almost every time I eat outside of the house I feel like my stomach is going to explode, like you can actually see a noticeable bloat like I’m pregnant with a helium balloon.

But even still, this fucking sandwich was worth it, it was so good. And the sweet potato fries were delicious too and I have to admit that I almost said “delish” which is something I would NEVER say, I am going through some terrible changes and fighting it every step of the way.

THEN WE TOOK THE L OR WHATEVER TO CHINATOWN, YAY! Specifically, because I wanted to go to MATCHA PANDA. Love me some matcha.

My stomach was so mad at me and I had no business putting anything additional into it but boy, I wanted a matcha latte and a fucking cake, ok. Also, I had a killer caffeine headache because some douchebag screwed me over at a rest stop and was already paying for his shit by the time I joined him after peeing and then AS AN AFTERTHOUGHT, turned to me AFTER HE SWIPED HIS CREDIT CARD and asked, “Oh, did you want something?”

I said, “Ha, guess not” AND STORMED OUT AND ON MY WAY TO THE EXIT I TOOK OFF MY WEDDING BAND AND THE ONLY REASON I HAVEN’T CHUCKED THIS INTO A LARGE BODY OF WATER BY NOW IS BECAUSE I MADE THIS RING IN KOREA AND FOR THAT REASON ALONE, IT STAYS.

So then, get this, he stops at the NEXT REST STOP and gets me coffee at 7-11 which I proceed to not drink out of principle, and that is how I ended up with a caffeine headache – NO, NOT BECAUSE I’M A STUBBORN CUNT, WHO SAID THAT? Because Henry is SELFISH and OBLIVIOUS! is the correct answer.

Thank you.

OMG all of the booths were so spacious and had giant stuffed animals at each other. I felt like VIP.

The matcha barista was super friendly and the vibes were vibing, totally immaculate. There was lo-fi r&b playing and yo, I felt like we were in a cafe in Korea and now as I am typing this and remembering the serene atmosphere, my eyes are tearing up. It burns. The memories of Korea sting my eyeballs.

Earl Grey and Pistachio millecrepes. D I V I N E. Asian desserts / flavor profiles are my faves.

And this matcha was magnificent. I love matcha so much. There was very little sweetness to this so the matcha really shone through boldly. Loved it for me. Henry did not like it and said it tasted like the earth but also, Henry does not like matcha in general. This is not the matcha that you get at somewhere shitty like Starbucks. This was legit.

Henry got a banana milk latte and he said, “Ehhh….it wasn’t terrible, I’ve had bet—-I mean, it wasn’t terrible. Let’s go with this.”

Chooch got a Spanish latte and didn’t like it. I don’t know what to do with these critiques because they’re coming from two people who, at the end of the day, do not like any type of coffee or espresso drink unless it comes from Dunkin’ and even then – do they really?!!? They load their drinks up with so many pumps of flavor syrups! How would they even know!?

Excuse the messy table, but I just loved the emerald / jade green color palette going on here. It was so soothing. Especially paired with the music.

I think this will become a place I visit regularly when I’m in town. (Much to Henry’s chagrin lol.)

Took the L back, got the car from the parking garage, and finally went to check in to the hotel which was a generic extended stay next to the airport so that made me nervous but the room was nice and it ended up being fine noise-wise too.

Chooch was pissed because he was relegated to the pull-out couch haha.

We rested for about 90 minutes and then I was being a bigmouth about wanting go AND DO SOMETHING. I mean, it was 7pm on a Friday night and Henry was content with just rotting away in the hotel room but I wanted to go out and live my life. I suggested Penn’s Landing (and by suggest I mean that I screamed I DON’T FUCKING KNOW, PENN’S LANDING MAYBE!? IDIOT!!!) and this entailed us driving back into the city when I thought we would just Uber or take pub-trans but Henry Knows Best, and then we saw pretty immediately that Penn’s Landing is under construction but by now, Henry was determined to park so that I could walk BY THE WATER which is what I kept crying about. I don’t even LIKE water that much but when I’m a different city it’s like WE HAVE TO BE NEAR THE WATER OR WE’RE NOT DOING IT RIGHT. I have no idea, don’t look for my travel guides anywhere anytime soon, that’s all I’m saying.

Henry finally found somewhere to park after AT LEAST AN HOUR of driving in circles with me and Chooch screaming “YOU COULD HAVE FIT THERE!” at him every 5 minutes, causing him to fire back with I’LL TELL YOU WHAT, ONE OF YOU TWO ASSHOLES CAN FEEL FREE TO DRIVE THEN! and we were like LOL NICE TRY.

Anyway, once we did park and then walk over to the water pier thingies, it was nice. We didn’t do anything aside from watch a dance-off and see some rats scurrying out in the open, but it was still better than sitting in the hotel room and whatever part of town this (old town??) was really fucking cute.

And then we went to Wawa and got back to the hotel around 11 which is an acceptable time to go to bed while out of town. If you ask me, anyway.

Full disclosure, I forgot to finish writing about this. Life is so fucking stupid anymore! Anyway, let’s just quickly looks at these leftover pics and I will maybe write some words where applicable. Like here for instance, where we ended up riding this rapids ride with a thoosie dad and his daughter who invited us to join them on their raft after we chatted in line about coasters. Chooch, wearing an actual coaster group shirt, offered nothing and I was left limping my way through the convo because even though I am always whining about having no one to talk to about coasters, as soon as I do have someone I clam up?? Anyway, Henry took an entire album’s worth of photos of us on this for some reason.

We didn’t eat lunch here, but did get a pretzel and it was just OK. But I will not judge the food at the park on that alone!

We were trying to push Henry toward Cinderella and Chooch yelled, “He’s your biggest fan!” YOU CAN RIDE A HORSE-DRAWN PUMPKIN CARRIAGE TO HER CASTLE, BTW. We sadly did not do this, Chooch refused after seeing the line and the low capacity of each carriage.

This place in a word: enchanting.

In two words? Add “charming.”

When I saw this castle on the website, I screamed, “I WANT TO TAKE HENRY’S PICTURE THERE!” and by “scream” I mean that I sent Megan a CAPSLOCK message on Teams. She was like, “Oh that’s a must!” and then when Henry tried to scratch this off the itinerary, I cried, “BUT MEGAN WANTED ME TO TAKE A PICTURE OF YOU BY THE CASTLE!!” and he was like, “OH FOR GOD’S SAKE.” Lol, thanks, Megan :)

If Henry hadn’t needed to stand in line for A PRETZEL we could have made it to the castle before people started to line up for Cinderella but whatever.

Some nice man took a picture for us – if we use this one on the wall, does it even count as a CAROUSELFIE though??

Also, Henry is wearing his wedding band but as you can see, my ring finger is bare. I took my ring off at the airbnb the day before and I don’t think I put it back on for 2 or more weeks after that LOL. I also took it off in Chicago too. Our fights are so much more meaningful now that I have an actual wedding band to take off in a fit!

I loved the nursery rhyme walk-thru area!

So did Chooch!

The attention to detail really tickled my soul.

Before we left, Chooch got his drivers license, LOL. Unlike Liseberg, where we both got our boating license FOR FREE, this cost $12! Worth it though.

Only other thing to note is that when we were in the candy shop waiting to buy a whoopie pie, we saw a cute little mole scurrying about! I don’t think I have ever seen a mole in real life before! That just added to the charm.

What a nice day and not a single fight. With that,  I think we can finally put this New England Birthday Trip to rest because honestly, I kind of don’t want to think about it anymore for a while.

I still have another Storyland photo dump as if anyone was worried about that. But here are some stray photos from my camera roll from after we left and started our drive home. I didn’t live blog because if I remember correctly my blog was down that day, what else is new anymore, so these are just kind of chilling with nowhere to go.

Henry wanted to GET STRAIGHT HOME, NO STOPS, NO DETOURS because we had a realllly long drive ahead of us and weren’t slated to get home until midnight. Well, it ended up being almost 3AM in reality because we did stop a lot and also it stormed at one point when we were in NY, and it was just a really long and aggravating drive – and yes we all took turns driving.

Almost immediately after leaving Storyland, I saw this cute covered bridge gift shop and Henry was like JESUS CHRIST when I made him pull over and then I didn’t even buy anything haha.

Chooch and I were competing with each other to get the best pictures from the car. Honestly though this whole White Mountain area was so beautiful and I am so sad that we didn’t have more time to stop and be leisurely (well, we could have had more time if Henry had taken the next day off which was MY BIRTHDAY but his job is more important than my happiness – UNDERSTOOD).

We stopped here for coffee but I got WEIRD VIBES so we walked out, which Henry hates doing but why would I still buy something if I wasn’t feeling it? Then he’d have just bitched about me wasting money SO I CANT WIN. Do not give me that “poor Henry” bullshit!

We ended up stopping in WOODSTOCK NH which is apparently 10.5 hours away from Pgh lololol.

The coffee was fine but they didn’t have pie??!!

Aside from 87 gas stations, 45 rest stops, and 1 Dunkin’ for a green goddess wrap (chooch and I are obsessed), I really can’t think of anything else worth talking about because I was still depressed and rearin’ to fight at every juncture. I think Henry had finally just opted to not make eye contact with me after a while to preserve the un-bitten state of his head.

This was one incredibly dysfunctional road trip. I don’t necessarily regret it but I currently associate it with manic mood swings and uncontrollable sobbing. One day maybe I will be able to compartmentalize that part and look back “fondly” (lol) on the good moments!

We spent the day in southern (?) West Virginia yesterday. I think it was southern. I don’t feel like looking at a map but I think we were at the bottom-ish of the state in Huntington. The main….attraction? was Camden Park which I’ll recap later in its own post, but afterward we had a late lunch (linner, really) at a nearby fastfood joint called Frostop. I saw it on Roadside America last week when I was scoping out the area around Camden Park and this was on there all thanks to the large, rotating mug of root beer that sits atop the snack shack like a crowned jewel of fastfood royalty.

I also saw that they have grilled cheese on the menu so it was a must-do at that point. Plus, I like root beer just fine.

Because I’m a fucking doof, I always search YouTube for videos on places that we are going to visit so I thought outloud, “I wonder if anyone made any Frostop videos?” Oh Erin, babe. Honey bunny with the half brain. Of course people have made videos about visiting Frostop. This is 21st century America. We the people have nothing better to do and there is an audience for anything. So, I found a video filmed last year and in that video, the girl working there that was being “interviewed” (ACTUALLY MIGHT HAVE BEEN OUR SERVER FROM YESTERDAY) said that the mug was not currently spinning because of some mechanical issue that was being looked at. So, that was a concern we had! I ONLY WANTED TO GO TO THIS PLACE TO SEE THE SPINNING ROOT BEER MUG! I WAS PROMISED A SPINNING ROOT BEER MUG!

As we drove down the road closer to its location, Henry spotted the mug on the horizon and HOLLERED, “It’s spinning!!!” I mean, great, but let’s not shout about it!?

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I guess Frostop is actually a brand of root beer and other “grandpa’s favorite” adjacent bevvies. For instance, I am 100% certain if I texted my dad right now and asked if he knows what Frostop is, he will fire back with an entire history of the brand alongside a picture of one of his pop machines with a row of Frostop for the taking. My dad LOVES pop, especially old-fashioned types.

But Frostop also has several “Drive-ins” in certain states, and the one in Huntington happens to be the closest one to us here in Pittsburgh so I really felt like we needed to stop here (even though Hillbilly Hot Dogs several miles away looked waaaaay cooler and actually veg options?!).

First impression: the girl who was working there yesterday was very friendly and personable and determined immediately that we were city folk who needed extra guidance. She explained that we could either stay in our car for CAR SERVICE (I didn’t realize this was a legit “drive-in”!) or we could sit at one of the umbrella’d tables and she’d be with us in a minute.

Second first impression: I LOVED THE AMBIANCE. Brown and cream is so ugly together but somehow it just works in these types of situations.

So honestly, this place could have had shitty food and I would still have enjoyed my time there. It was just my style. Add it to the list with Pal’s Sudden Service and Mr. Happy’s. 

And Mama Steve’s and Mr. Pancake.

The expressions.

I would like to note that Mush Brain struck again when the server asked what I wanted to drink and I confidently said, “Mountain Dew.”

“Sorry, we only have Coke products,” she said, and I was like, in my Mush Brain, thinking that was weird considering this was literally named for its root beer and that’s when I realized that MOUNTAIN DEW inexplicably came out of my mouth instead of root beer?!

“Oh! I meant to say root beer,” I corrected myself. “I don’t know why I said Mountain Dew,” and then I glanced at Henry who was looking at me with “are you having a stroke?” eyes. You guys, Mountain Dew was my drink of choice for pretty much all of my teens and into my early 20s until I basically quit drinking pop / soda cold turkey so I can’t even remember the last time I actually ordered a Mountain Dew at a restaurant or pulled one out of a cooler in a gas station, yet for some reason it rolled so effortlessly and familiarly off my tongue like I blinked and it was 2001 again.

Bizarre.

But yes, I know I said I never drink sodas anymore but I had to make an exception and get the root beer that they are famously named for! You can’t go to Frostop and not get a Frostop, or so I hear!

Chooch got a lemonade and we both opted to get our drinks in mugs. Henry got his in a to-go cup for some reason.

OK, HERE’S THE REVIEW: The root beer tasted like ordinary root beer to me (also, I’m glad that in the video we watched, the guys got root beer floats because prior to watching that I had grand designs to float it up but then I saw them and they are MASSIVE. It would have knocked me out for the day, and I might have had to puke at some point on the way home, not trying to be vulgar for once, just honest!!!). The grilled cheese was a big time meh. The bread was meh, it was barely “grilled,” and the cheese was soooo bad, like something you’d expect to be served up in a nursing home. Like, if my brain was cheese – mushy, but less melted. It was very strange cheese.

So, don’t get the grilled cheese. If you eat meat, Henry ordered BOTH the burger AND weiner and said they both good.

BUT YO.

THE ONION RINGS.

Wooooooo baby. Those were some of the BEST onion rings I’ve ever had. Also, note that I am super picky re: onion rings and onions in general. I hate when the onion is still practically raw and crunchy, and I also hate when you bite into it and the entire strand of onion is pulled out.

This was the PERFECT medium – not raw, but just crisp enough that one bite would sever the onion AND it didn’t have that slimy worm feel to it. I was so happy with these onion rings, but my stomach was NOT. Even without indulging in a root beer float, I still ended up down for the count and actually thought I was going to have to throw up before we even left the place. My bitch baby stomach just cannot handle anything greater than peanut butter toast these days, it’s so pathetic.

I did not end up puking, you’ll be pleased to know, and was able to last long enough at the table to BUY A FROSTOP SHIRT. The last 5 or so years, I have been in my commemorative diner/restaurant t-shirt or mug era. It’s so random and Henry doesn’t even hesitate anymore when I say, “I have to get a shirt.”

So, I now happily own a Frostop shirt just like the ones the employees wear!

“Aren’t you excited to inherit all of my diner and fastfood t-shirts when I die?” I asked Chooch.

“Yeah, I am so excited. I can’t wait,” he said in a monotone slick with onion ring grease.

“And my haunted house journals!” I added gleefully.

“I’m excited to burn those,” he said.

WOW.

And that was our memorable time at Frostop. SHOULD I TRY TO VISIT ALL OF THEM NOW?!

The last part of our New England Bi-Polar Road Trip was a half-day romp through the most precious, adorable, wholesome, charming amusement park I think I have ever seen – StoryLand in the White Mountains of New Hampshire! I knew a little bit about this park from my friend Alyson who lives in NH, but other than being familiar with its fairy tale aesthetic and the fact that it has a pretty intense wooden coaster for a children’s park, this place was a mystery to us. I kind of thought that we’d just run in, grab the 2 coaster creds, then head home.

But yooooooo, boiiiii. Hold up. This place exceeded expectations immediately upon entry. I really wasn’t expecting it to be such a whimsical oasis in the mountains of NH. I mean for god’s sake, the first thing we encountered was this little show!

WOW THE JOY ON CHOOCH’S FACE AS HE POSES FOR YET ANOTHER PHOTO WITH MOMMY.

OBSESSED ALREADY. THIS IS MY STYLE!!!

Are we back in Norway, though?? I’m kind of glad it has taken me so long to recap this day because seeing these pictures with fresh eyes is so much. I can’t get over how actually enchanted this place is. And it was kind of cool because in the early morning portion, it was overcast and drizzly, which added even more ambiance if that’s even possible. It did get sunny later on though so we got to experience the park both ways!

Did you know I’m obsessed with cuckoo clocks?! One of my  plans for either this shitty house or a future one if we ever fucking move (oh god, please let us be able to buy a house someday while Henry is still spry enough to carry out all of the projects I have packed in the dark recesses of my mind) is to have an entire wall of cuckoo clocks set at different times. Not annoying AT ALL.

OMG this really has to be the cutest themed teacups I have ever seen. I’m obsessed. Bavarian Norwegian crossover of my dreams.

Dude, it definitely felt like being in Norway again!

The ride operator said she loved Chooch’s Minion Crocs and that opened up membership to some kind of bizarre Croc Compliment Club because he started getting comments on those fuckers all the livelong day after this. He was so happy about it, to the point where he even started eavesdropping on people around us to see if they were talking about his Crocs.

Ugh. Now he knows what it’s like to be COOL LIKE ME.

Wow, thanks for the great video Papa H.

Then we went on the cutest little log flume that was PANDA THEMED. One of the ride attendants was named CHEESE and she was so cute! Also, we got in a “pre-line” for this baby because it didn’t start running until 10am and Chooch was like, “I can’t believe we’re lined up for a baby log flume” but it was part of the experience because we got to stare down the little girl in front of us who kept turning around and looking at us LIKE WHAT, WHY? BECAUSE TWO BIG PEOPLE WANT TO RIDE THIS DUMB LOG THING WITH NO CHILDREN??

LOG FLUMES ARE FOR EVERYONE.

When we were coming back into the loading area, there was a baby squirrel trying to cross over the trough!!! We had a moment with the ride attendant over it lol.

After we got off this, we ran to another section of the park because ROARASAURUS was now open! It’s a crazy intense woodie in a children’s park!! The thoosies LOVE this bitch.

It’s one-train ops but the line was just a station wait so it really wasn’t too bad. Chooch and I rode in both the front and back and TBH I wanted to ride it more times but Chooch and Henry were like, “let’s move on.”

The train is so cute!!

Henry said, “Look it’s Splash Battle Mountain” and I realized he was trying to make a Dance Gavin Dance joke and this KILLED Chooch and me. At first, I slipped and genuinely laughed but the I realized that I was giving him credit for landing a joke so I quickly started to criticize him and then gave him examples of how he could have made it make better sense.

Ugh. Obsessed.

I loved the Dutch-ass section too!!!

The second coaster cred was this polar bear coaster thing that was actually pretty fun for a small scale family coaster! Also, many comments on the Minion Crocs in this line.

This is what the station looks like from the brake run! The theming here was immaculate. I would have been in heaven if I had gone here as a child. Now I’m pissed. DID MY PAPPAP NOT LOVE ME ENOUGH??

OK, that’s all for now!