Hopefully, there will be a day when I stop holding my breath as Chooch ascends/descends a flight of stairs. Hopefully, that day comes soon.

6 comments

This was at Warped Tour, where you couldn’t walk an inch without accidentally booting a crushed water bottle into the heels of the person in front of you. For some reason, I always have this itch to photograph random feet when I’m out in public. Maybe I have a fondness for trampled litter, who knows.

And hey, the Bronx is a great band.

5 comments

Urgent. Will die without reading.

• 13:30 Henry called me a whiner-baby WHATEVER THAT MEANS. #
• 20:46 was going to write about Warped Tour tonight but it appears that I’m job-searching instead. Oh Life, you card. #
• 21:36 I just resigned from my job. Tomorrow is my last day. My boss almost cried and then I almost cried. Ow. #
  

  ---

• 19:31 UM. Tina just said goodbye to me because she’s leaving early and I FEEL SAD. Like, a legitimate twinge of sadness traveled my body. WTF. #
• 21:10 evidently I don’t smoke Swisher Sweets correctly. Feeling ill is the 1st sign. Smiling while smoke seeps through my teeth is the 2nd sign.
  buy amoxil online buy amoxil generic

  #

---

• 15:40 It’s a good thing my pre-ordered Anthony Green CD arrived today, because I’m feeling crushed by post-job-quitting blues. Ouch. #
• 20:33 Just called a cop a fucker. Henry frowned. #
• 12:01 My kid is so abusive. I shouldn’t flinch every time he nears me. #

Automatically shipped by LoudTwitter Now you can rest easy, knowing my inner most thoughts and movements.

---

11 comments

Henry is old and naps. A lot.

---

Urgent. Will die without reading.

• 12:37 You know there’s something wrong with me when those douchey Teletubbies are on my TV and I don’t even bother to turn it.
• 13:37 Henry just taught me that the phrase No pain, no gain does not literally mean "push urself until u rupture muscles and choke on puke"
• 13:53 Toni Basil gets on my nerves, but she made me fist-pump when she said this: Great art makes you feel something; its not just kids stuff.
• 17:06 Words will be the death of me
• 18:47 There’s ice cream cake at work. I asked Tina to cut me a piece since I’m helpless. She sighed in annoyance but I caught her smiling coyly.
• 18:53 As she’s catering to me in mock exasperation, Tina just said I remind her of a little girl she used to babysit. Flirt alert.

---

• 12:19 Two $24 concert tickets cost me $73.70. Does my blood taste good, TicketMaster?
• 15:48 Outerspace is disgusting
• 16:26 Maybe you’re the one that’s overrated.
• 01:00 My heart belongs to Nightdreams
• 01:05 I want to direct a porn where Jesus and Satan bang each other.
   

Automatically shipped by LoudTwitter. Now you can rest easy, knowing my inner most thoughts and movements.

 

9 comments

I wanted to go to an amusement park, but all Henry gave me was a shitty playground.

4 comments

Chooch finally poses now. Hopefully, gone are the days of back-of-the-head action shots.

8 comments

Abandoned house in Saltzburg, PA. Have newfound, uncontrollable desire to film horror porn there.

3 comments

Do you think he likes the Misfits, maybe?

 

4 comments

 

 

 

Two weeks ago, I couldn’t find the right shoe to this pair and I was almost reduced to tears. I paced around, hands in my hair, saying, "Where the fuck could it be?" over and over. Then Henry found it in the basement (thanks, Chooch) and became my automatic hero for like, an entire ten minutes.

I’ll never tire of Converse.

8 comments

 

5 comments

Christina’s here to indulge in some Girl Power J.Lo movies and Blue’s Clues birthday cake.

Then, to wash all that down her gullet, we’ll be going to the much anticipated Chiodos show tonight with Henry’s kids, where I will dance like Bobby Brown and they will want to die.

In other words, this weekend is pretty full of awesome.

(Well, if you’re into that shit, but probably it would just be lame for everyone else.

)

7 comments

Kara is the keeper of the owls. If one might have an inclination to try and remove an owl from the wall or maybe, say, rub their genitals against one, it just might provoke her to step out from the mirror, gouge the offender’s eyes out, blend it up into an ocular smoothie and invite the owl predator to drink up. Cheers.

(*This was taken at lunch yesterday, which I will write about when it is not Sunday, because on Sundays I don’t like to be writin’. I do important things on Sundays, like bug the shit out of Henry and make him buy me things and then maybe I might kick around some pebbles down at the graveyard, drink some Jack on the pier, become embroiled in a knife fight with a bike gang: my world is pregnant with possibilies.)

10 comments

 

 

4 comments

"Ever since Starlite cracked his hooves, I’ve had to use this sight-seeing boat in Cleveland to get to Rainbowland," Rainbow Brite explained after changing the Mormon’s skirt to a light tangerine, a hue better suited for a trip to Rainbowland than steely gray.

"Oh darn, I think I left my Jesus DVDs back on land."

6 comments

I dye the ugliest eggs. I was so excited at first but then quickly tired of it. Chooch was a big help. He only succeeded in cracking the eggs every time I let him drop one in a cup. Mainly because I would forget that I already had an egg in it. Before long, Chooch abandoned me for Blue’s Clues. I sulked for awhile, then took it out on the eggs. Easter blows.

5 comments