I wanted, NAY—NEEDED, to get a real breakfast yesterday morning before heading out of New Jersey after barely eating the day before because of NERVES and being CONCERT FOCUSED. We stopped at Tick Tock Diner because it was on the way out and we had seen it the day before on our way to the hotel. It was about 7:30AM on a Saturday and only four other people (all male solo diners) were there which was kind of weird but whatever.

Then I saw the breakfast prices and look, I’m no economist and barely understand the value of a dollar but these prices felt outrageous to me?

Like, the prices for those sides? That’s….a lot, right?

I mean, I’m no stranger to $17 avocado toast but it’s usually at a trendy brunch spot with IG-ready backdrops, not a basic diner?

I did like the ambiance though AND Sade was plating when we walked in, followed by a playlist of Erin-approved 80’s and 90’s jams until an unexpected—and unnecessary—instrumental only version of Walking on Sunshine came on. Not needed.

Our waiter’s name was Joe and he had what sounded to my untrained ears a Greek accent if I may be so bold to assume. He was really nice so it wasn’t a total bust.

I was glad to put some protein and healthy fats in my other fats but at $17? I would not say this was worth the $17 but it was at least satisfying.

Henry got pancakes which is uncharacteristic of him.

BREAK FOR SOME CHARMERA SNAPS!

Waiting for the elevator on our floor, ready to check out, crying about missing BIGBANG. (I literally dreamt about the concert, the first time ever it continued on in my dreams. I will mention this again and again for the next several posts until I get it out of my system, just pretend I’m your Granny Appledale who tells the same stories over and over and no one has the heart to tell her this also because she doesn’t let anyone get a word in edgewise.)

(‘Word in edgewise” is so weird when you think about it.)

Ew, this place had the same gross Temu Ketchup that that one diner near Dorney Park has!!!

They serve the coffee in what I originally thought was the creamer carafe. It was odd but I think I liked it? Also, BIGBANG nails. :(

(I have someone’s entire concert video playing right now on YouTube, I am so broken, LOL.)

We did a slight detour into the Philly after this to drop off a bike pump and jeans for Chooch at the Dunkin’ he works at. It was basically a “hi/bye” situation since he was working but one of his co-workers goes, “ARE YOU RILEY’S PARENTS?” and seemed genuinely tickled about this so I said, “WHY, DOES HE TALK ABOUT US?” and he said, “yes, only bad things” which I can believe LOL.

“Ugh my parents are so annoying.”

OK we have reached the point in the blog where it’s time to discuss Henry’s first embarrassing moment(s)! We were at a rest stop and the 7-Eleven looked kind of different — I asked him if it was always like that (it kind of spilled out into the main dining area and I didn’t remember it being like that on the billion times we have stopped at this exact one on the way home from visiting Chooch). It wasn’t really that deep, and then he was being SO SLOW AND INDECISIVE looking for a snack and people kept running into me so I shouted, “I HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE!!!” and went out to wait by the car.

He was gone for SO LONG.

When he finally came out he was sort of doing this weird chuckle and I was like, “WHAT HAPPENED WHY WERE YOU GONE FOR SO LONG.” For some idiotic reason, he decided to ask the cashier if they had renovated and she said no, it’s been like that for years. So he was like, “OK cool” and left. But then he realized he needed a straw for his stupid drink so he went back in and asked her where the straws are. He said she goes, “Over there….and there’s also one behind your ear.”

I FUCKING HATE HIM LOLOLOLOL. I’m so glad I wasn’t there when this happened because he is so embarrassing! Then!!!! He noticed there was something on the driver’s seat so he went to get a towel to clean it off and when he turned around, I said, “Well, whatever it is, it’s also all over your shorts. Good job, you look like you have poop on your pants.”

It must have been chocolate, is all I can imagine, but it was just smeared all over the back legs of his LIGHT GRAY shorts and he got mad at me for  not noticing earlier? Like bro, I’m not your mommy!!!?? If anyone noticed, they probably didn’t think anything of it because he’s old.

Then he started choking on trail mix and it’s like, can you please not!?

We got to another rest stop and he was SO CONCERNED about his poop pants that he wouldn’t go in through the main entrance because there were too many people. They were all old men in khaki shorts, I pointed out. “They all probably have poop pants, too, you’re fine.” He was being soooo whiny about it and was making me walk behind him, LOL

Then we had to walk out a side door to avoid people on the way back to the car and I was almost peeing my pants at this point like I was trying to join him in human waste-stained solidarity.

Then we made it home right when it started storming bad and we JUST MISSED all the flooding.

Today! I met Megan for coffee this morning at Uptown Coffee. I haven’t seen her IN A MINUTE. I think actually it’s been since last December when we were in the office for the Christmas party?? Insane. I was happy that she texted me to see if I was free—I’m usually a total drag when it comes to spontaneity but I can’t sit here and complain about friends not asking to hang out and then turning around and saying no when they do, right?? And my only plans were to also go to a cafe with Henry so I dropped him like a hot potato and said, “I’m going with Megan instead, bye.” LOL. OK maybe I was less cunty about it.

There was some car show happening near the cafe and it was so fucking annoying. The cafe itself wasn’t bad until some totally airhead mom came in with her young daughter who proceeded to shriek and scream and then block the door so people outside couldn’t come in while her oblivious mom stood staring into space. Megan and I kept giving each other LOOKS and I was trying to show this broad GRACE like people always say to do but I’m thinking that GRACE isn’t something that works with me.

Then!!! The HUSBAND came in with THREE MORE DEMON KIDS!!! It was so terrible. They took up so much space and acted like no one else was there (when in fact every other table was occupied). It was unbelievably inconsiderate so we ended up going outside and it was just as bad out there with people posting up right next to us no matter how out of the way we tried to get, and then proceeding to SHOUT over our heads at their children who were standing elsewhere. WTF is going on with parenting these days?!!?

In addition to this, there were speakers set up in the courtyard that were evidently trying to shoot country music up to space, it was so skull-fuckingly loud. You’re annoying, Mt.Lebanon. So many rude assholes were out and about.

I came home and ate a quick lunch then Henry and I walked to the Hollywood to see the new Korean movie “Hope,” which was SO GOOD BUT STRESSFUL and I was giddy because they said 갑자기 a lot which you might know is my favorite Korean word and I even have it as a charm that I was wearing today too!

But this is where Henry’s second embarrassing moment of the weekend comes into play. In the middle of the movie, he leans over and LOUDLY whispers, “I have to pee.” Like OK cool, good for you, you don’t have to fucking announce it every time like you need a hall pass, you go to the bathroom in the middle of every movie, bitches don’t even need context clues to figure out why you’re getting up.

So, I’m already annoyed to begin with that he felt the need to do this because there were other people sitting on the balcony too, so perhaps STFU.

He’s gone for 5 seconds and then I hear:

CRASH

BANG

*metal sounds*

I closed my eyes and sank down a little in shame, knowing EXACTLY that he tripped over the garbage can.

I think probably even the people downstairs were like, “Wow, someone just tripped over a garbage can, it sounds like.”

Then when he came back, we made eye contact and both started laughing.

“I tripped over the garbage can!!” he stage-whispered, like buddy let’s just get you a megaphone at this point.

“Yeah, I got that,” I sighed.

“And then I almost fell down the steps! I would have died!” he went on. This part I DID NOT KNOW and now I was CRYING in my seat, picturing him tripping over the garbage can and then clutching it tightly to his chest as they both barrel-rolled down the steps together.

I nearly pissed my pants AGAIN, second time in one weekend!!! I COULDN’T STOP LAUGHING and it was so painful to keep trying to stifle it, like being in church and not only getting a laughing fit but getting a laughing fit over something totally inappropriate to boot, like when those people in Philly fell into the grave hole with the casket they were carrying. I laughed for weeks over that but imagine if I was in CHURCH laughing at that.

I’m getting off the rails as usual, sitting here crying with laughter (alone—Henry is not laughing and keeps tossing dirty looks in my direction) and actually making myself overheated.

THE GARBAGE CAN. The steps start right to the left of it.

Anyway, once the movie was over, I was able to laugh out loud about this and then almost had a pee-attack while waiting to the cross the street and probably looked like a lunatic standing there with my legs crossed, face humid and moist with the GIDDY GLAZE.

And that has been my weekend with lots of laughter at Henry’s expense!

I fear that I will never recover from last night you guys was that even real did I really actually see MOTHERFUCKING BIGBANG?? The EMPERORS of Kpop?! Your idols’ idols?! The pioneers of “paving the way”? The ones who walked so others could run? They are untouchable. True artists and I am AWESTRUCK.

We’re on our way home now, after stopping by Chooch’s Dunkin’ in Philly to drop some stuff off for him (not drugs, just a bicycle pump and jeans – boring) and I can’t stop thinking about last night.

It’s going to take me a few days to collect my thoughts on here but in the meantime here is what I wore! Nothing too flashy—I’m more comfort-concerned than fashionably creative (but goddamn there were some AMAZING cosplay outfits last night).

G-Dragon (and Taeyang) were born in 1988 and G-Dragon often wears Seoul 88 Olympics hats and is famously obsessed with the number 8. I bought this jacket on eBay last year in hopes of someday having the opportunity to wear it to another GD concert or BIGBANG (I was really high-hoping at that point!).

My shoes are GD’S Peaceminusone Paranoise Air Force 1s but I ended up not wearing them because they’re not broken in and good thing I swapped them for my Vans because we ended up standing in a merch line for 3 hours outside in the blazing sun before doors opened (this is not hyperbolic – it was probably actually longer than 3 hours but the sheer unbridled joy of the actual concert wiped that bad memory from the brain bank).

Also!! We made a friend. Well, Henry did. Her name is Michelle and she was staying ah our hotel. Henry was in the elevator with her earlier that day and they were talking about how they’re both going to BIGBANG and she was nervous about getting back so he offered to meet up after and give her a ride. Thank god she trusted him because when I finally met her after the concert, we started yammering on to each other like we were old friends and it was the most organic and natural conversation I’ve had with a stranger in a long time! We’re IG friends now and she said she is making me an honorary Korean which was the best end to an already incredible night. I am FLOATING today.

I waited my whole Kpop life (10 years!) for this day and it is finally here – we’re on our way to see my ultimate #1 not-just-Kpop but all-time band (tied with the Cure). BIGBANG IS FINALLY HERE!

I’m not liveblogging because I just want to listen to them the whole there while looking out the window dreamily.

I CANT WAIT TO BE WITH 50,000 OTHER VIPS! I CANT WAIT TO SEE DAESUNG LIVE FOR THE FIRST TIME! I CANT WAIT TO HEAR “LIES”! I CANT WAIT TO CRY WITH EVERYONE ELSE DURING “HARU HARU” AND “STILL LIFE”!!!

I’m a mess.

P.S. Henry said he is most excited for “BIIIG” and “Fantastic Baby” – he likes the anthems the most!

We tried to keep the rest of the weekend pretty chill after yet another whirlwind Philly trip on Saturday. Chooch, we love you, but that drive is so B O R I N G. Most of Sunday was pretty boring and lowkey — I went on walks and then conned Henry into starting an exercise program with me. Then that night, we walked to the Hollywood Theater down the street to finally see Teenage Sex & Death at Camp Miasma!

It was SO GOOD. But first, can I just say that I love supporting local independent theaters and I think that the Rowhouse has really made the Hollywood shine but it is so annoying every time we go there because there is only one person checking tickets and then that same person handles concessions and I don’t know what I’m in such a hurry for but it’s so annoying. This night was especially annoying because we were behind some broad who was having issues and then had questions and then was indecisive, all of these things. I think what it all boils down to is that I hate standing in line and it’s kind of like, what is the point of buying tickets online if I still have to stand in line.

Please  work this out, Hollywood.

I tried to go into this as blind as possible and really only knew that the scenery was painted and knowing this changed my whole perspective. I actually got so teared up over how beautiful it was. I also LOVED the campy, over-the-top kill effects and the lowkey humor.

The only thing I didn’t like was Henry’s heavy breathing! I was calling him Little Death all night.

So good. 2026 has been such a banner year for horror, I can’t believe how many amazing – and wildly different – options we’ve had this year! I think Obsession is still the one that genuinely scared me the most and got under my skin to the point where I don’t think I will ever watch it again (and I mean that in the best way ever).

The next day, I wanted tofu banh mi for lunch for we went to Meet Pho in Oakland.

STOP LOOKING AT MY BLUE COCONUT LATTE, YOU PERV!!!!

LOL, this was a gift for Chooch.

Also, my banh mi was quite satisfying.

Henry got vegan pho and said, “It was good.” I only just asked him now, three days later, because I forgot to ask him then (see also: I didn’t care if his was good because I was too busy beasting my banh mi.)

I was trying to take a picture of the place because it was so cute but Henry ruined it by standing up at the exact same moment. Idiot.

Then we did my favorite activity: post-meal walk-about. Luckily, Oakland is a great place to walk. I was feeling oddly sentimental about the Cathedral of Learning. I didn’t enjoy most of my time at Pitt but I truly did like being in the Cathedral. So any class that wasn’t in the Cathedral was immediately the worst class ever.

I think that Philadelphia is a better city than Pittsburgh in terms of things to do but Oakland as a campus is superior to University City. Sorry Drexel and UPenn but you guys don’t have Cathy up there.

A red door that I liked.

I was telling Henry all of my favorite things about the Cathedral like it was our first date and he didn’t live through the Pitt years with me. Sometimes I can’t tell if he legit can’t remember or if he’s just indulging me, but I always 100% know that I am regurgitating stories and NOTHING CAN STOP MEEEEE.

In other Labor Day News, one of the Sleazy Femme Film Fest filmmakers followed me on Instagram! It made me so happy because her short (Filth Eater) was insanely captivating. And then I saw on their Instagram that they took a picture of the crowd (I must have known because I look prepared??) and I had to screenshot it because it shows how genuinely happy I am when I’m at the Glitterbox. I have spent the last decade or so feeling lost when it comes to community and even though I have only just started going to events here, I feel so comfortable here.

Screenshot

I also love that Henry got cut out of the picture because usually when group photos at events happen, I’m the one who doesn’t make it in! Usually someone moves and blocks me with their head. :( But anyway, this is me in my happy place so now you know :)

Speaking of Glitterbox, there is an event there that I want to go on Saturday if we get back from NJ in time!

LOL I ended the post about helping Chooch move and forgot that Henry and I had the audacity to go out to dinner afterward without him hahaha. He was like, “W O W” when he found out, lol.

To be fair, we didn’t eat until we got to Harrisburg and it was just at the Capitol Diner which is not that great but sometimes you have to take what you can get.

Immediately Henry had to chase after the hostess after she dumped us at a table — the whole dining room was full of empty tables and she sat us right next to the only other occupied table where we were practically pressing into each other, it was so uncomfortable. But on the way there, we passed a veritable Backrooms of empty booths so Henry asked if we could just sit at one of those. She said yes (I would have left otherwise, I am SERIOUS about where I sit in a restaurant!!! It takes very little to make me overcome with uncomfortable feelings) so then I was happy.

Big baby mood.

We had a wonderful server who immediately liked my phone case so I knew that moving sections was, well, the move.

I ordered the HEART HEALTHY omelet which came with cottage cheese. Can I just say that I am so smug about cottage cheese having its moment? Everyone is fucking with cottage cheese now when I have been made fun of my whole life for enjoying a side of those creamy curds. I remember one time I ordered a fruit salad that came served on a mound of cottage cheese and the person I was with said it looked like I was eating rot. :(

(I hope melba toast has a renaissance next.)

I only ordered the diet breakfast platter so I could beast a slice of coconut cream pie without guilt.

The lady in the booth behind me was so fucking annoying the whole time. She was running our server ragged and just being so high maintenance. I don’t know what dessert she ordered—-I think it was some cheese cake variation—-but she asked the server, “Do you put whipped cream on the side?”

The server said yes, and I was thinking she was requesting the whipped cream on the side, but FIRMLY said, “Please don’t.” She then launched into this boring explanation about COMMERCIAL WHIPPED CREAM and it would be different if they make their own whipped cream in house, but she cannot “do” COMMERCIAL WHIPPED CREAM.

Until I got my own pie placed in front of me, I was so confused about this question, like who just asks out of the blue, “Do you put whipped cream on the side?” but then I saw that both Henry’s and my plate had a small dollop of whipped cream on the side. More of a decorative plating choice than anything else, I imagine, but then made me think she has probably been there before and knew that they did this so that made more sense but also—just don’t eat it? It was legit just a small squirt.

Both she and her dumb man companion were extremely annoying and talked about the most boring things (setting up a trust, for instance, zzzzzzzz). It made me realize that Henry actually isn’t the worst conversationalist after all.

Crazy!!

Here are some Charmera snaps!

Ew, I used the bathroom before we left and the woman in the stall next to me flushed and walked RIGHT OUT OF THE BATHROOM WITHOUT WASHING HER HANDS. I mean, that’s her choice I guess BUT I COULDN’T HELP BUT NOTICE THAT SHE WAS WEARING BLACK SHOES AKIN TO THOSE WORN IN THE SERVICE INDUSTRY, WAS SHE ONE OF THE SERVERS?!?!

Henry was hulking around by the hostess area when I came out and I hurried over to ask him if he saw who came out before me and of course he was being Captain Obtuse and gave me approx. 3 different answers like, brother this ain’t multiple choice.

He said it “could” have been one of the servers (“Not ours!”) he said, but he’s not entirely sure if that’s who he saw come out before me because there were two women in there when I walked in.

What a lame mystery.

Well, that’s about all the highlights—titillating, I know. We didn’t make it home until almost midnight. These same-day trips are so tiring but worth it even just to see BEST SON (lol) for a few hours.

Plus, we got to listen to a ton of BIGBANG and Romanian popcorn music, lol. And we had “good talks.” Communication, y’all.

*except in this case, “down.”

We had to do the exhausting there-and-back to Philly on Saturday to bring Chooch a bed frame, mattress, box spring, and dresser + other miscellaneous crap like his bike that he’s been begging us to bring for 2 years but we don’t have a bike rack, and clothes that he “lost” but were in his room. Henry had to rent a pickup truck and I absolutely hated being a passenger in it. It was a RAM whatever that mean, and it said REBEL on the side. So embarrassing!!

I found issues with it immediately upon entering, the biggest being that my headrest was pushed forward and we couldn’t fix it but Henry kept saying it was the same as his and brother, I didn’t have to fully turn around in my seat to tell you that this was completely untrue. His was straight up and down! MINE WAS TILTED DOWN AT AN ANGLE! So then he exclaimed, “There fixed it for you” and I said, “Thank god” as I went to put my head back only for it to keep falling BECAUSE HIS SOLUTION WAS TO TAKE THE HEAD REST COMPLETELY OFF WITHOUT TELLING ME?? I almost snapped my neck!!!

Anyway, I ended up fixing it by accident an hour into the drive when I violently wrenched it forward which disengaged something and snapped it back into the proper position! I was so happy! FUCK OFF, HENRY.

The only other memorable thing that happened on the way there was that at one of the rest stops, I was about to enter 7-11 when I saw two people coming out so I held open the door and stepped aside to let them through first. The guy in the lead was some redneck biker hick motherfucker carrying a carton of Marlboro who did not acknowledge me at all, and the next person was also a white guy (ugh) but he at least muttered a thank you, must have fucking killed him. Oh, the emasculation.

Then I started to enter the vestibule when I saw that a man was behind me so I lunged back to hold the door open for him.

“I got it,” he said politely. “They should have been holding the door open for YOU,” he said with the verbal equivalent of “smh.”

“Oh I know!” I cried. “That first guy didn’t even say thank you!”

Anyway, I know you are so surprised to find out right now that the polite guy was Black and not a CIS WHITE AMERICAN MALE. THE SCOURGE OF THIS COUNTRY.

I tried to tell Henry this story (he missed it because he was pouring our life savings into that fucking truck’s gas tank) but he didn’t care. He tends to tune me out when I’m standing on my I HATE WHITE MEN business.

We made it to Philly around 1pm and I proceeded to barely do anything to help, but that was a given. No shocks and / or awes were passed around.

I said he was moving “down” because he and his roommates Josh and Will went from the 20th floor at Summit to the first floor of this seriously cute townhouse. All three of them have their own rooms and bathrooms and it’s on a really cute and historic street too, about 4 blocks away from where they were currently living, so still close enough to walk to classes, etc.

Also, Chooch started working on a new Dunkin’ on Friday after not being able to get a job a Dunkin’ despite having prior Dunkin’ experience to the point where he casually mentioned it to the manager at the one near our house when he was home last summer and she (jokingly) said, “You’re not on the list, are you?” which made him spiral thinking he was on a do not hire list simply because he only have 1 week notice when he resigned IN HIGH SCHOOL.

In addition to this, he starts his new co-op in a few weeks! He’ll be doing something with UPenn’s football recruitment (Drexel doesn’t have a football team so he’s really stoked to get to do SOMETHING football-related even if it’s at a different college – but the co-op is still through Drexel so….) I still have no idea how these co-ops work when I told Todd about this one, he was genuinely stoked for Chooch and said this should be a really good opportunity for him, especially if he’s trying to open football-related doors. His end-game appears to be working for the Seahawks at some point. I have no idea

My mom has had this unused mattress in a spare room in her house for years so Chooch is now the proud owner of an antique bed set. “This is what people slept on when I was your age, son. None of these rolled up foam mattresses saturating the market these days!”

Chooch was so mad because I kept managing to put myself in the most inconvenient spaces while offering no assistance. I did unwrap one of the cups he made in pottery and I put in on his windowsill though.

Butts.

Chooch and Josh bought this on Marketplace for a housewarming gift for themselves.

After an absurd amount of time watching them walk and forth like Sims, we left to go to Ikea because Chooch needed a desk and other assorted housewares.

He was opening a pack of crackers from the back of the REBEL RAM and grudgingly gave me one when I begged like the pigeon that I am.

“Ew! How old are these?” I cried, the cracker leaving a stale paste in my mouth.

“Old,” he said. “They were in the cabinet.”

“EW FROM THE LAST TENANTS?” I gagged.

“Yeah but they were still sealed. You’re fine,” he waved it off. Oh OK dad!

UGH.

Ikea was miserable as usual. But he did get a desk and a bookshelf, plus other home goods and a large house plant, and I got a candle and a pillow.

Chooch and I were standing outside by the pick-up zone waiting for Henry to come back with the TESTOSTERONE TRUCK. We were standing directly behind an empty spot, and then two women were standing behind another empty spot two over from us.  Chooch and I were like, “What is happening” because the women were like, “OH WOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWW!!” in a super “ARE YOU KIDDING” tone as Henry started backing into the spot we were standing in front of and that’s when I realized their guy was also waiting to back into it but Henry cut him off.

“He had his turn signal on first,” Chooch muttered in defense of Henry, and I didn’t understand why that man was trying to pull into our spot instead of the empty spot where his women were standing behind, but I also wasn’t trying to have a confrontation in Philly. I mean, we were standing 10 FEET AWAY FROM THEM, if that. So I went over and said, “Hey, I apologize on behalf of my husband (ugh I hate that word LOL) – he has no situational awareness.”

And then they were both suddenly like, “OMG NO, IT’S TOTALLY COOL, YOU’RE FINE!” because I guess they weren’t expecting me to actually come over and say something. But this is my new thing you guys. Instead of seeing who can out Karen the other, my tactic is to be a normal stable member of society and smooth things over by being direct instead of either avoiding it altogether or getting hyper-aggressive. And then I get to move on with the day without having an adrenaline break-down / post-confrontation embarrassment or stewing in the regret of not saying something at all.

The best part was that the guy did the “WHAT THE FUCK?!?!!?” hand motion to Henry (who again, no awareness, completely had no idea any of this was going on) so then his women had to go over and tell him to cool it since I apologized, and then I made Henry apologize too as we were all leaving and the other people were like, “HAHAHA IT’S FINE OMG NO BIGGIE!”

It’s like a really fun way of calling people out for overreacting. (I’ve been on the other side of this before and I can tell you, I have felt like shit LOL.)

After this, we had to go back to Summit so Chooch could get the rest of his clothes out of his old room. I asked him if he’s going to miss it there and he said, “Some parts, but NOT the management.” He sounded so old when he said that.

I just can’t believe how fast time moves. This is his third year at Drexel already. Two more to go. (He opted for the 5 year route so he could get an extra co-op in there for more job experience.)

We had to go to Henry’s work today to get our car so we could take our rental truck back, etc etc no one cares. But immediately, I cried, “I NEED to take a picture of you posing with the Faygo truck” which turned into several poses much to Henry’s chagrin. You can almost the live version of these photos with him grumbling, “AW COME ON!!”

Anyway, we’re about to watch a move at The Hollywood now so ciao for now

Sigh. On Sunday, Henry and I took Glenn and his wife Amanda out for dinner and celebratory drinks because guess what, you guys? Glenn has retired after 18 years at The Law Firm (16 of those years being harassed mercilessly by me!).

Working from home makes everything so anticlimactic. There was no official send-off or gathering of any type planned so I was like, “Fuck it, I will go rogue.”

Glenn suggested two of his favorite places to go to and I said, “OK just let me know which” and he goes, get this, “Why not both?” OK Glenn! Bar-hopping on a Sunday, don’t mind if I do?!

First, we met at Glenn’s house (“come to my house first and I’ll show you my wheelchair collection,” he said, and I almost fell for that because I am so gullible) and Henry got to meet (dog) Henry!

And we got to meet all of their chickens! They have so many! And they all have names which I love.

Anyway! First we went to Shenanigans for pre-dinner drinks. And let’s be very clear here – I had one beer at each place, so – two beers + food. I don’t know how people can drink more than that!! We had the most delightful server at Shenanigans. I loved it there a lot and not because there is also a bar on DAYS OF OUR LIVES called Shenanigans. (Is it still there? I haven’t watched DAYS in so long that I feel like Stefano could have set fire to it without my knowledge.)

Then we went to Hal’s for dinner and had a not great server.

But I got to meet one of Glenn’s adult sons!!!! He is a cook at Hal’s and came out to see us and when they introduced him to me, he said, “Yes, I’ve heard a lot about you.” LOLOLOL. Notorious in all the wrong ways!

We went back to their house afterward and hung out for hours on their front porch, talking and telling old work stories to Henry and Amanda who I’m sure were like, “Zzzzzzzz.” I did crack up at one point when Glenn mentioned having a bonding moment with one of the most disliked partners in the Firm (at least from our department’s perspective) and Henry goes, “WOW” because he has heard this name so many times over the years. Henry has always been an honorary Law Firm member.

Monday was Glenn’s official last day. Before he logged off he sent a department-wide email with a Looney Toons “That’s All Folks” gif and I WON’T LIE, I TEARED UP.

I’ve had since June to prepare for this, when he emailed me the morning that he was planning on telling Amber of his retirement plans. I remember that I was out on my early morning walk when I saw the email come through on my phone and I actually stopped walking to read it — that’s how you know it was serious. I rarely stop walking!

I was immediately sad, but then my second emotion was, “HAHAHA FIRST!!!” because I love being the first to know things!

I think anyone who has read my blog even semi-casually over the last 16 years knows Glenn. Our performative feuding and pranking was legendary.

Here are some of my favorite Glenn moments:

GLENN BEING THE REASON WE HAVE TRUDY!!

Schaufensterpuppen Saturday

GLENN AND TERRY’S BEEF!!!

(This is a multi-parter so you have to also click the hyperlink at the beginning of this post!!!

Work-Bro Lunch Date. You’re Welcome.

THIS IS BASICALLY WHAT STARTED IT ALL:

Wacky Worm in the Law Firm

GRAVEROBBER GLENN!!

Halloween Work Desk Decoration Memories

RANDOM WORK LIVEBLOG WITH GLENN MENTIONS!

Rainy Monday Liveblog

MORE GLENN RUMORS: SATANISTS AND LESBIANS!!!

Work Haps: One Week in March

The Week of Barb, Day 1

COLLECT ALL THE GLENNS! – Last but not least, here is the entire blog category full of all the dead celebrity memorializing I would do using Glenn’s employee ID picture.

Those were the days, you guys. Fuck Covid forever because nothing has or will ever be the same again. Wishing Glenn (GRUDGINGLY) all of the best in his next chapter, though. Ugh. Sucks for the rest of us!

Saturday night had us doing another “Who knows what this even is” event that I found a month ago when looking up local shows to check out. As usual, I did the bare minimum research, enough to determine that I liked what I heard, and then bought tickets. (Ah, these $15 non-Kpop local shows have had me spoiled! You should see my PayPal Credit balance now that Kpop concerts are picking back up, UGH). Four small bands promoting a 4 way split release? In the words of the great Truman from Pappo’s, “LET’S DO IT.”

We got to Bottlerocket a bit before doors and chilled at the bar. This place is AMAZING. The 70s vibes are chef’s kiss! The wood paneling made me feel swaddled in a cloth cut from my childhood. The old school game shows playing on the vintage TVs around the bar were fantastic alone but when it switched to BATTLE OF THE NETWORK STARS I was wigging the fuck OUT. You guys, that was my SHIT. I can’t remember what TV station played a weekend long marathon of this in the early 00s but I watched it all until my eyes turned bloodshot and I walked away with a concerning crush on ROBERT CONRAD and the addition of “hullaballoo” to my already stupid lexicon.

Coincidentally, one week before this, we were at that Sleazy Femme Film Fest at the Glitterbox. In the Kentucky drag queen documentary from the 80s, he referenced BATTLE OF THE NETWORK STARS!!! Granted, it was in a disparaging sense, but still!

This Kennywood poster is fucking outstanding.

Too much Steelers stuff though.

Gays for Carter!

My hair looks nice now at least (Thanks, Gemma!) but my face still looks old and haggish. Can’t have it all. (Not on MY salary, anyway!)

Bottlerocket’s thing is hotdogs. First, Henry was like, “ME NO NEED DOG-DOG. ME ALREADY EAT DIN-DIN.” But members of some of the bands were sitting across from us, openly and heartily enjoying a buffet of hotdogs so Henry’s will power eventually crumbled faster than his face whenever I’m doing something that makes him frown.

“That one kid just ate like 5 hotdogs in a row,” Henry frowned, and then ordered his own shortly after. Color him inspired.

I had to send action shots to Chooch who responded: “Ew don’t send me this.”

I felt super comfy here. Woman at the door was really nice, bartender was really nice. Ambiance was nice. It was just NICE.

After our recent Roboto experience, we were heavily scrutinizing every person that walked in, trying to determine if they were connected to any of the bands and if we were, once again, going to be the outliers. There was a healthier crowd this time overall but I do think we were still the outliers LOL.

OK, enough small talk! Let’s get into the bands because I am now obsessed with all four.

First up was Kwarter Zip from right here in Pittsburgh! They introduced us to their brand new drummer, Josh, who had to learn all of their songs in like 2 days when their original drummer quit. They said the only bad thing about Josh is that he’s from Philly and a Flyers fan, “so that sucks.”

Then Josh said he needed a second to fix something before they started the next song and the singer goes, “Our new drummer, Josh, everyone. He’s from Philly and he needs a second.” I don’t know why this was so funny to me but I’m also the same person who has been obsessed with ringer tees and the word “hullaballoo” ever since one weekend watching Battle of the Network Stars.

I really liked them! Good, solid Pittsburgh emo.

The next band was Lofting (from Lancaster!) and the singer was the “kid who just ate like 5 hotdogs in a row” LOL. I laughed to myself over this then quickly grew concerned and hoped he wouldn’t barf up there.

He did not.

And they ended up being my favorite band of the night (all of the bands were so good though!!).

I sent Chooch one of the videos I took of them and he goes, “Wow, they’re allowed to do that in Lancaster?” LOL.

One thing I will say, since there were so many hotdogs being doled and ingested by all, the hotdog stench was unhinged in the area around the stage. At the bar where it was actually being cooked in a gas station-style rotating box thing? No stench. Near the stage? Smelled like fermented Ballparks. Like everyone at their hotdogs and then collectively sweat the juices out through their pores. It was incredible to witness, in a Biblical, 1000 ft tsunami wave sense. Like three-day old cookout garbage left out to fester in humid conditions, only the odor was being emitted from concert-sweaty armpits.

MMmm.

I was holding my breath a lot.

Third band was Be Safe from Frostburg, Maryland and their style of emo is the kind that breaks hearts but then kindly helps you sweep up the pieces. Did that make sense? Do you even come here expecting sense, though?

This evening was giving me such mini-Bled Fest vibes and I was loving it so much.

In between each band, I rejoined Henry at the bar. He never moved once except to use the bathroom. Every time I came back, he had a new war story for me (“I don’t know what this lady is doing but she keeps standing so close to me and it’s bothering me!” or “That one girl has been walking around talking to everyone.” Incredible updates, truly.)

Last but not least, Short Fictions from Pittsburgh! This was Henry’s favorite band of the night although he did say, “They were all good. I liked them all. It was good.” They had a video of hamsters playing in the background, and the singer was talking about how his hamster (“Hammy, because kids are so fucking creative”) died when he was in third grade and not only did his mom go to the school and have him called to the office to tell him, but she also brought Hammy’s corpse with her. This made me think about how I had two hamsters in high school and then one ate the other because the pet store people didn’t think to tell me, a teenager, that hamsters shouldn’t cohabitate. I think that’s a trauma I haven’t properly processed.

(One of my hamsters was a girl and I named her Bizzette after Bizzy Bone from Bone Thugs n Harmony which is a detail I need you to know.)

The singer reminded me of my friend Wonka in a way.

Anyway, they’re playing at Bottlerocket again on 11/15 so maybe Henry will be inspired to go see his new favorite band again and beast another hot dog??

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Of course I bought the split release too! What a great night at a great venue with great bands.

And real quick, we’ll end with my Charmera snaps from the night:

HENRY’S HOT DOG. It had coleslaw and “bottlerocket” sauce on it.

Hot dog mastication in progress.

Kwarter Zip.

Lofting.

Be Safe.

Short Fictions.

No bad moments, no complaints, not a bad seed in the crowd.

The infamous four-way split!

I have loved all of the concerts we have gone to this year and how they have been in such varying genres that it’s almost whiplash-inducing. But I have been ACHING for Kpop. The last one we went to was Key in December of 2025!!! There just haven’t been any of the “big ones” touring this year that will make me shake my wallet out like a spiritual summoning and since NO KPOP CONCERTS ever happen in Pittsburgh, I can’t justify road-tripping for a nugu group that I only semi-stan just to get a Kpop fix.

But you guys!!! In two weeks, I am going to see my ULTIMATE GROUP, MY FOREVER #1s, THE GROUP THAT GOT ME INTO KPOP AND KOREAN-EVERYTHING TO BEGIN WITH:

THE LEGENDARY BIGBANG!!!

Oh, I am SICK TO MY STOMACH over this one. Even Henry is totally stoked for it. JFC I never thought I would get to see them in real life!!

I am going to be insufferable (even more than usual) when this happens.

Then, I just TODAY got tickets to see TAEMIN AGAIN!!!! This time he is performing at arenas, as he should. I am so excited for this. However, I only bought one ticket so Henry will be sitting alone wherever he is able to get a ticket for on the day of, lol. This one is in October. I’m so happy and grateful, my heart is filling more full just at the thought of being around Kpop stans again. (The normal ones.)

This fucking angel baby:

Prior to this, Ten (WayV / NCT / SuperM) announced a N. American tour and I got us tickets to see him in Baltimore! They were $60 each! Literally the cheapest Kpop concert tickets I’ve ever bought (this was artist presale but I think even face value is that cheap) which is CRAZY because Ten is my ult NCT bias (tied with Haechan). I had the privilege of seeing him with SuperM in 2019*  but never with WayV and never solo so I am SHAKING over this one! It’s three weeks after Taemin, in November!

Just knowing that these are all on the horizon has me feeling more myself than I have all year and I am READY to break out my lightsticks and scream my throat raw!

(Not Kpop but we’re also seeing the Korean band LEENALCHI at the Warhol in November, as well! I’m so happy! Remind me of this post next time I’m whining and complaining about something dumb.)

*I think this may have been the last Kpop concert went to with me. :( It was also my first time seeing Taemin!